The Bringer Of Destruction
by AlexisBlade
Summary: Stephanie Shepard. First human Spectre. Survivor of Akuze. Hero of the Blitz. Butcher of Torfan. Saviour of the Citadel. An enigma capable of bloody violence and heartfelt compassion. Her records begin at sixteen on Mindoir but who or what came before?
1. Awakening

_**Had a few typos pointed out to me hence this page has been re-posted. Still no Beta if anyone's interested...  
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_**Heading into AU territory a little... okay maybe a LOT, same overall story line of Reapers and Collectors, however, this Shepard is a combination of origins and had a rather different upbringing that will greatly impact what is to come. Oh and there's no way it'll be finished before ME3 comes out, ME3 may or may not influence things but if my story line is just far too different to integrate ME3 then I won't.**___

_**As per usual Bioware owns all Bioware characters.**_

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><p>The pain was excruciating. She'd thought she'd felt the worst pain possible when Thresher Maw acid had burned through her left shoulder right into the bones. This... this was so much worse. It was as though every pain receptor in her body had been bathed in Maw acid. She wanted to scream but movement in her throat turned to spasms and made it so much worse, she wanted to puke she was in so much agony, as though the action would purge the pain from her body not cause more. Disjointed voices wafted through her consciousness. It took her a moment to determine there was a man and a woman. The man sounded excited. The woman angry.<p>

Forcing her eyes to open, another agonizing trial of torture, it took far longer than it should to focus. The bright lights making it hard for her to adjust but when she did her focus was narrowed on two unforgettable cobalt blue eyes. She could feel drugs in her system trying to pull her under but she'd been trained to resist and she fought ferociously, not simply to thwart the drugs but because those eyes, she _knew_ those eyes.

The mumbled voices began to gain clarity.

"She's not responding to the sedatives." the man was starting to sound anxious.

"Then give her another dose _now _Wilson." the woman looked away from her to glare vehemently at the man in the background somewhere.

Stephanie Shepard's focus widened a little to take in the woman's face, her perfect skin, the way her long raven locks hung around her shoulders, the twitch in her left eye that was followed by an ever so slight biotic rumbling which screamed she was outraged over something. When she looked back Shepard's heart rate spiked.

Miranda Lawson prided herself on her ability to compartmentalize and to emotionally detach from any given situation. This one, however, she was struggling with. She'd spent over two years of her life putting Stephanie Shepard, survivor of Akuze, Hero of the Blitz, first Human Spectre, Saviour of the Citadel and Humanities golden child back together. She was _not_ going to lose her to some fools amateur mistakes. Shepard's beautiful amber eyes that had seen so much and held so many secrets were locked on hers. They were focussed with the steely determination the woman was known for but there was something else in them. She had to be swimming in pain but it was _surprise_ radiating from those luminescent eyes.

"Shepard I know it hurts." she spoke clearly and calmly to the woman.

Shepard managed to concentrate hard enough to raise her arm, reaching out for Miranda Solheim just to see if she was real, if she was really there after so long.

Miranda gently pushed the hand back to the table, knowing that the touch would cause her even more pain and seeing it in the slight hiss from Shepard, the clenching of her discoloured jaw. "You must relax, you were seriously injured and need time to heal." she swallowed at the intensity of those eyes, those eyes that were trying to tell her something to reach out to her in some way.

Shepard's voice wouldn't work, it just _wouldn't work!_ She tried desperately to even just _say_ her name but got nothing, not even a grunt for pete's sake.

"You're going to be just fine." she reassured the fighting woman, secretly very impressed at how long Shepard was holding out against a double dose of already higher than normal sedatives.

A ghost of a smile pulled the right side of Shepard's lips, Miri had told her that the last time they'd seen each other as girls. She'd also promised to keep in touch, though she never had, but she was here now and she trusted her. She relaxed back and let the drugs drag her back into numbing oblivion.

Miranda's eyes widened ever so slightly. She had seen that look of unconditional trust in only one other who had surprisingly similarly unique amber eyes, Persephone Calleyuss. Why would Shepard have given her that look? That level of trust to a perfect stranger? She'd think over it later, for now she was livid with Wilson, "I _told_ you the numbers were off. Run them again." she snarled.

Shepard was still listening as they talked numbers and levels and though she wasn't a doctor herself she knew that something in them sounded wrong. She'd been hospitalized long enough after Akuze to pick up on quite a bit of medical talk.

Shepard awoke again to a world of hurt that was being exacerbated by alarms and explosions and someone yelling at her to get up. She heard something about an attack and her military instincts kicked in. Stowing the pain for a later date she sat up, a little groggy as the last of the drugs wore off and new ones kicked her full of adrenaline or something that had similar effects.

"Your armour's in the locker to your right, we'll get you a weapon on the way out there isn't one in med bay." Miranda's voice was commanding her over a loud speaker.

Looking to her right she saw the appointed locker and not caring for her appearance or modesty right now she pulled off the loose surgical gown and bare naked went to get her armour. Only she found it wasn't actually _her_ armour. It was new. Still carried the N7 markings though, the black and red looking even more impressive than she recalled. This armour was fitted to her perfectly. It felt a little heavier but was surprisingly well padded and _comfortable_ against her raw skin that was still screaming at her. She felt a slight hiss through the suit as a pain relief agent was administered by the armours medical VI. The HUD that appeared on the inside of her helmet's visor was a little disconcerting.

"Damnit! Those canisters by the door are going to blow, take cover." Miranda's voice was terse, she was clearly anxious and pissed off.

Shepard smirked as she ducked behind the operating table she'd just vacated. Pissing off Miri was a seriously bad idea, that was a lesson she'd learned via one of her father's goons who'd tried to tell them stargazing on the roof was stupid. She'd sent him flying with her biotics never to be seen again.

A moment later an explosion rocked the lab. Shrapnel flying everywhere and causing some very suspicious sounding hisses from other canisters.

Before Miranda could say a word Shepard was on her feet and sprinting for the now blown apart door. She threw herself through it and hit the deck as another round of explosions rocked the room she'd just vacated.

"Someone is hacking security trying to kill you, you have a dozen mechs closing in on your position." Miranda's voice was coming through her helmet now.

"Wilson doesn't have hacking experience perchance does he?" Shepard muttered dryly, her throat was hoarse and a little husky from lack of use.

There was a pause before a response, "Apparently he does." Miranda's tone was just as dry as she too had been taken by surprise by this revelation.

"Oh what luck. How many mech's he send after you?" Shepard ducked over an upturned table to find the security guard on the other side had been shot, his pistol was on the floor not far from his hand. However, what caught her attention was the activating mech up the stairs to her right. No time to reach the pistol she lit up her biotics and warped the machine with far greater strength than she'd even been able to achieve before.

In the meantime Miranda had checked her screens to see that indeed a formidable force had been sent to her own location. "A few." she answered Shepard's question, her glance away from the screens had meant she'd missed Shepard's slight distraction.

"I'd hazard a guess at more than a few if he sent a dozen after the comatose patient. Where can we rendezvous?" Shepard picked up the pistol and took in her surroundings. Clearly this was a space station. The emergency fire system had kicked in and was hosing down the lab behind her, or at least attempting to in its somewhat compromised condition. There were stairs to her right and a couple doors to her left.

"The docking bay. Take the stairs to your right, there's a more defendable position to engage the mechs through the corridor." Miranda instructed her, quickly making her own preparations to deal with the three dozen mechs coming her way. Wilson certainly wasn't taking chances, she'd ask how Shepard knew it was him later.

Shepard was already on the move as soon as Miranda had said 'stairs'. She seemed to be moving okay. Last thing she remembered, other than the last time she'd woken, was tossing Joker into the emergency pod and being sucked away from him. It all got hazy after that but she figured she was obviously picked up and her injuries a little too expensive for a regular hospital, no hospital had a security force of mechs at its disposal. The room Miranda was talking about had a raised area on the right and plenty of cover behind numerous work stations. Not wanting to risk overusing her biotics as she wasn't sure of her limits now she opted for the high ground and crouched for combat.

It was not a long wait.

The mechs filed into the room in precision order. They were lined up like ducks at a shooting gallery and Shepard blurred into motion. Her hand eye coordination hadn't suffered and she took down the first seven mechs with pinpoint accuracy before her thermal clip overheated. Not having a spare she resorted to her biotics and crushed the remaining five mechs. Normally she'd be feeling a little drained after the string of heavy biotic manoeuvres, however this time she wasn't even breaking a sweat.

"Did you alter my biotics?" Shepard asked curiously as she jogged over to the fallen mechs to scrounge their thermal clips.

"You will probably notice a few upgrades, this isn't exactly how I planned to wake and prepare you for them." Miranda growled, she'd only got a short glimpse of the legendary figure in action before she'd had to go on the offensive against her own diversion.

"Granted. Where now?" Shepard could see only one way ahead and was quickly jogging it. She grimaced as the door opened to a clear walled corridor which showed quite clearly on the other side a fierce fire burning and a couple of doctors running for their lives before a heavy YMIR mech gunned them down. There was nothing she could do for them so she quickly kept moving.

"You're doing great Shepard. Keep following the corridor, take the lift down a level and continue right. You'll find our head of security, Jacob Taylor pinned down on a crossway. He'll get you to the docking bay, I'll meet you..." she stopped as the communications suddenly dropped out. "Damn you Wilson!" she hissed and threw herself at the mechs in her rage.

"Miranda? Miri!" Shepard frowned as the HUD showed that communication lines had been severed. "Alright Taylor, here I come." she muttered to herself and followed Miranda's instructions. She paused a couple times only to check out some logs. It appeared that Miranda had been working on her for quite some time and that her injuries had been far more extensive than she'd thought. All of Miranda's observations were clinical and detached referring to her simply as 'the subject'. It was cold, very cold to be called such a _thing_, it was almost a little hurtful in fact.

Jacob Taylor got the shock of his life as none other than Stephanie Shepard waltzed through the doors and began decimating the mechs on the other crossway that were pinning him down.

When they were all taken care off she strode over to the dark skinned man who was standing up and doing a double take at her.

"Shepard? What are you doing here?" he gaped, brown eyes wide in disbelief, "Things must be real bad if Lawson has _you_ up and about." he shook his head in dismay.

"Miranda woke me up and sent me to you, if you're Jacob Taylor. We need get to the docking bay where I assume she'll be meeting us once she's dealt with her set of mechs." She wasn't sure if they were talking about the same person, Miranda could've gotten married for all she knew.

"Huh, well Lawson'll be fine, a bunch of mechs won't put her down." He shrugged, still looking at her in disbelief.

Shepard nodded, "I take it she's in charge?" she motioned for him to start walking.

"Yeah, Director of the Lazarus Project." Jacob got the hint and took the lead.

"Lazarus Project?" she wracked her brain as to why that name was familiar, Sunday school came to mind, a story of a guy being raised from the dead. "Wait as in resurrection Lazarus?"

"Yep. You were nothin but meat and tubes when they brought you in, couldn't get any deader if you tried what with being spaced then entering atmo and to top it off hitting dirt real hard." he glanced over his shoulder as she came to a sudden halt.

"Wait, what now?" she was utterly confused and had no idea what he was talking about.

He stopped and turned to her, "Do you remember what happened?"

"I remember up till I shoved Joker in the escape pod, then something sucked me back and things get real fuzzy." her brow furrowed as she closed her eyes and bowed her head to try and remember, "I... it feels like I was spaced, it gets real cold and hard to breathe." she shivered at the sensations it brought.

"Yeah, you died Shepard. There was quite a tussle over your body, Shadow Broker wanted to sell you to the Collectors. As you can tell he, she, it, didn't succeed. Your body was brought here and the docs've spent a bit over two years putting you back together." He watched her closely for her reaction but her face was covered by the helmet.

It took a very long moment for Shepard to process that. She'd been killed but she'd been brought back to life. "Miranda..."

"Project Director. She and Wilson did most of the work, if the technology didn't exist she designed it, whatever was needed to bring you back, no expense spared. How do you feel?" He smiled, it was really her, she was really standing here talking with him, very much _alive_ and _kicking arse._

"Like shit actually. I get the feeling I'm not quite up to scratch yet." she shook her head, "Two years? I've been dead for _two years_?" she just couldn't comprehend that just yet.

"Yeah." Jacob simply nodded, waiting for her to be ready to keep walking. It was clear for the moment but there was no way of knowing how long that would last.

"My crew, did they make it out?" She asked the first thing that came to clarity in her stricken mind.

"Most did." he nodded.

"Chief Williams?"

"Yep."

"Liara T'Soni?"

"Yep."

"Garrus Vakarian?"

"Yep."

"Doctor Chakwas?"

"Yep."

"Joker?"

"Oh yeah." he smirked at that one.

Tali and Wrex had already been off ship, Wrex back to his people to pull their arses into line in readiness for the Reapers, Tali back to the Flotilla to complete her Pilgrimage.

Shepard relaxed a little, "Alright so it took two years to bring me back from the dead. Are we talking cloning or what?"

"You'll have to talk to the docs, as far as I know you're all you, just with a few extra bits." he shrugged, not knowing any of the science stuff, he was a hired gun for head of security and this attack showed he'd gotten slack and let something in.

Shepard forced herself to keep walking, so many questions were running through her mind. Where was everyone? How the fuck was she alive? What was happening with the Geth, the Reapers? Why did the _Collectors_ want her body? She was pulled out of her thoughts by a voice coming over her comms.

"Check, check is there anyone on this frequency?" Wilson asked quickly.

Shepard stiffened and bit her lip to hold back the snarl.

"Wilson? That you?" Taylor was pleased to hear the docs voice.

"Taylor? Thank god, I thought I was the only one left." he _sounded_ relieved for some reason.

"I've got Shepard with me, where are you?" Taylor waited for a location before he'd decide which way to go.

"Shepard's alive?" _Now_ he sounded stunned.

"Indeed I am. Mr. Taylor asked you a question sir, it would be prudent to answer." her husky voice was colder than normal.

"Uh, yeah, server room B. Look you've got to hurry, the mechs are right outside... Oh god, help!" he cried out and the signal was lost.

"Let's move." Taylor jogged off at a smart pace.

They encountered some heavy resistance on the way but between their shooting skills, which Taylor proved to be quite the marksman, as well as their biotics, which Taylor had average skill in, the mechs didn't last long. After all Shepard had spent a great deal of time taking out Geth who were a hell of a lot smarter than simple security mechs.

Taylor dashed forward at the sight of Wilson sitting on the ground holding his leg from a gunshot wound, "Wilson!"

"Taylor, thank god. I thought I could override the mechs programming from here but they got me first." he grunted in pain.

Shepard swaggered over and stood over Taylor as he crouched down to look at the injury. Her experienced eyes told her it was one thing... self inflicted.

"There's some medi-gel in the cabinet over there." Wilson nodded to their left.

Second thing her experienced eyes told her was the medi-gel was actually in reach if he'd been of a mind to get it.

"Would you mind Shepard? I gotta keep the pressure on." Taylor glanced up at her.

Third thing, there was a decided _lack_ of mechs in here and _no_ blood trail.

Wordlessly Shepard went to the cabinet and rummaged for the medi-gel. Tossing it over to the man she left the two to their own devices momentarily, always keeping her eye on them of course, and went to the server. Wilson had done a number on it but Tali had taught her a lot about hacking things and geth were infinitely harder to hack than standard terminals.

Miranda was sick of these bloody mechs. It was like Wilson had set just about every mech on the station on her. She threw a couple with another powerful biotic attack when suddenly they just shut down. Waiting behind cover to see what they'd do they remained stationary for a moment before they just powered down. A voice over her communicator startled her briefly.

"Well Director Lawson, would you like a word with our dearly beloved Doctor Wilson in person or shall I?" Shepard's voice murmured in her ear.

"Just shoot the son of a bitch." Miranda growled, "Have you powered down all the mechs?"

"Yes. There are also no other bio signs than the four, soon to be three of us." Shepard murmured.

Miranda silently swore with vehemence all that escaped her lips though was a softly muttered, "Bloody hell."

"I'm sorry about your colleagues Miranda." Shepard offered sincerely.

"You are all that's important now Shepard. Deal with Wilson and get to the docking bay, I'll prep our departure." Miranda growled.

"As you wish." Shepard smiled at the old line, though Miranda didn't offer the standard response which was curious though it _had_ been a long time and they'd been kids. She'd been all of thirteen and Miranda sixteen though the three years difference hadn't meant much to either of them.

Taylor was still working on Wilson when she returned.

Wilson jumped slightly as Shepard bent down and took his pistol from where he'd dropped it on the ground beside him, "I'm gonna need that." he grunted.

Shepard took off her helmet and ran her fingers through her hair that was so much shorter than she was used to, it only came to her shoulders. "Taylor have you worked much with bullet wounds before?" she ignored him.

"I was an Alliance corsair, I saw my fair share and that was before joining... this company." He glanced at her, not sure what he should tell her just yet.

"Then you probably should know that wound was self inflicted." She glared at Wilson with her infamous death glare that had him going sheet white and trembling in his boots.

Taylor jerked back, "What?"

"Find it curious that the medical doctor is in the server room trying to 'fix' the mechs?" she levelled Wilsons gun on the now sweating man's head.

"Actually now that you mention it." Taylor stood and quickly drew his own weapon on the man, "You don't have clearance for anything security related."

"Now wait a minute here, I can explain..." he began to beg for his life, no idea what Shepard thought she knew.

"No need. Miranda sends her regards." Shepard smiled coldly before pulling the trigger and shooting him between the eyes execution style. "Comms are back up. It's just you me and Miranda."

"How'd you manage that?" he was impressed.

"I spent a good six months with a Quarian hacking geth. It wasn't too difficult." she shrugged, "Mechs will no longer be a problem and Miranda is prepping our departure, we should get going." she thumbed over her shoulder at the door.

"Before we do, there are probably some things you should know." Taylor shifted his weight a little self consciously after seeing her just execute the guy on the floor.

Shepard frowned slightly and waited.

"Lazarus... is a Cerberus operation." he admitted openly.

Shepard froze as that sunk in.

"The Illusive Man's put in a whole lot of resources bringing you back Shepard. Everyone else wrote you off and worse." He put in quickly seeing the look on her face.

"I wiped out a fair number of Cerberus facilities. Why the hell would he want to resurrect me? Didn't I get the point across?" she demanded firmly, her death glare aimed at Taylor now. Cerberus had been responsible for Akuze, for the deaths of everyone in her unit except Toombs and then they'd performed horrific experiments on him. They'd also been responsible for the death of another platoon of marines, for the death of Admiral Kahoku, for experimenting on Rachni and husks and Thorian Creepers all of which they'd lost control over and every civilian on their bases had been slaughtered while the top scientific personnel had bunked down in 'panic rooms'.

"That's way above my pay grade. I just figured you should know the truth, Miranda probably wouldn't say anything till we got to another facility." he shrugged, hoping she wasn't going to kill him now, perhaps it _hadn't_ been such a wise choice to make informing her. His fears increased as he felt her biotics surge around her and her cybernetics lit up a fierce red, god they were _intense_.

"I appreciate your honesty Taylor. Now I'd appreciate leaving." She growled, clamping down on her biotics with fierce willpower. Interrogating him now would only end up very badly... for him and he could prove useful if his 'honesty' continued.

Taylor nodded and led on.

Now that Taylor had said this was a Cerberus facility she could definitely see it. It was far too neat and aesthetic for any Alliance base. It set her teeth on edge but even more was that _Miranda_ was Cerberus, a bloody Cerberus _Director_, entrusted with billions of credits worth of resources over four billion of which had been just put into _resurrecting_ her alone. That immediately screamed she was a very influential member of the terrorist group. How the fuck did Miranda Solheim become a bloody terrorist? She silently fumed as Taylor led her to the docking bay at a much quicker pace now that mechs weren't trying to kill them every step of the way.

They reached the docking bay to find Miranda waiting outside one of the shuttles that was powered up and ready to go.

Shepard almost skipped a step at the sight of her in a white and black Cerberus uniform that was more like a cat suit that hugged her gorgeous curves. She'd been hot at sixteen but now she was an absolute _goddess_. Clearing her throat she quickly caught up to Taylor.

Miranda was watching her movements in person now. They were graceful, not the military bearing she'd expected but more the smooth lines of a dancer. She watched as Shepard took off her helmet, her cybernetics were glowing, red cracks breaking through her skin indicating that she was agitated. It was the only sign visually that she wasn't yet fully healed. "Taylor, Shepard." she greeted them with a curt nod and motioned them inside.

Taylor cleared his throat, his sign of being uncomfortable and quickly entered with a mumbled, "Lawson."

Miranda narrowed her eyes after him and glanced at Shepard who looked stone faced which could mean she was pissed as hell at something. Before she went in Shepard paused to study her, scrutinizing her for something. Miranda said nothing and simply scrutinized her right back. Whatever Shepard had been looking for she wasn't sure if she'd found it or not when she wordlessly stepped into the shuttle. Her gaze returned to Jacob and she hissed softly through her teeth as she realized what the problem was. The fool had _told_ Shepard they were Cerberus. Of _course_ she was furious. Both women were now.


	2. Memories

Shepard sat opposite Taylor and buckled in while Miranda sorted them out and set the ship on autopilot to the nearest relay, which was hours away.

Miranda returned to a tense atmosphere she could just about cut with a knife. "It seems Jacob's told you who we work for." she sat down beside Jacob and calmly crossed her knees in a relaxed manner to try and diffuse the tension.

Shepard merely nodded.

"Whatever you think of Cerberus the Illusive Man has gone to great expense to bring you back because you're needed. You have seen and done what no one else has and the Illusive Man is showing great faith in you and your abilities. I'd ask you at least extend the courtesy of listening to what he has to say before you attempt to kill everyone." She informed the woman curtly.

Shepard looked to her with a closed expression, "You saved my life. It would be rather ungrateful of me to kill you for it." she returned in a controlled voice, though the huskiness remained.

Miranda noted it, she would have to take a closer look if it didn't improve. Perhaps some water would help. Getting up she continued speaking as she sought out a bottle for the Commander, "As you know we had to wake you up early due to unforeseen circumstances. There are really lots of tests we should run to determine your recovery."

Taylor interrupted her, "Shepard's physically in top shape, she tore through those mechs like they were toys."

Miranda nodded, "How do you feel?" she asked, finding a bottle and holding it out to the woman.

Shepard narrowed her eyes and looked from the bottle to Miranda skeptically.

Miranda rolled her eyes and opened it to drink from it herself before holding it out to Shepard again.

At that Shepard took it, "Thank you. I feel like I went ten rounds with Wrex and he ended up sitting on me."

"Understandable. Is it musculature pain or skeletal?" Miranda needed her to be specific.

"Muscles, everything's a little brighter than it should be as well and my skin feels like it's on fire." she wasn't complaining, just stating what she felt in response to the question she was asked. Then she lifted the water to her lips and drank deeply, finding it very refreshing.

"So far they sound like side effects from being inactive for an extended period of time and will fade in the next few days. I'd like to ask a few questions to determine that your memories are intact." she continued clinically.

Shepard made no move to respond while she was drinking. The cool liquid running down her throat was divine. When she was ready she closed the lid and nodded to Miranda.

Miranda glanced at Jacob.

"Akuze. You were the sole survivor of a Thresher Maw attack, what can you tell us about it." Jacob asked amicably.

Shepards cybernetics and biotics both flared but her voice, still husky, was tightly controlled, "What in particular would you like to know? That I lost a lot of friends that day? That the Alliance lost a lot of damn fine marines for your little experiment?"

Jacob frowned and looked to Miranda for clarification.

"You believe that Cerberus was responsible for Akuze?" Miranda clenched her jaw and her eyes flashed but other than that her face maintained the cool professionalism she was known for.

"I have two very good reasons for believing so. First. I was _not_ the only survivor. Corporal Toombs also survived the attack only to be taken by Cerberus and experimented on, he had Thresher Maw acid pumped through his veins to see what it did to humans and a whole host of other horrific things done to him in the name of _science_ and _advancing humanity_." she watched their faces closely. Miranda's remained a mask while Taylor looked appalled.

"And your second reason?" Miranda's tone carried a clear warning in it.

One Shepard ignored, "During my hunt for Saren, Admiral Kahoku's marines went missing. He tried every channel he could to locate them and was stonewalled everywhere he turned." she paused as she sought the right words.

"That's hardly compelling evidence..." Miranda began but Shepard cut her off with a wave of her hand.

"I found them. Not intentionally actually. I was answering an Alliance distress beacon. A beacon that just like on Akuze had been set up in the centre of the Thresher Maw pit. My team managed to take out the Maw as there was only one of them in this nest. Admiral Kahoku's marines, however, did not. They were killed down to the last man." she glared at Miranda.

Miranda had heard of Shepards 'death glare' and could certainly understand why most people trembled in fear from it, she however did not. "Pirates could have placed that beacon."

"Plausible. Until you consider the fact that the further Admiral Kahoku dug the more toes he stepped on until he discovered that it was _Cerberus_ who'd set it all up. He sent me a message detailing the base responsible for the scientific investigation, he was terrified for his life at the time and rightfully so." she clenched her fists as dark energy began to swirl, it was so much harder to control with the amplified power.

Miranda shifted in readiness to act should Shepard lost control of her biotics.

"I led an assault on the base and amongst numerous monstrosities I found the Admiral's body. Killed by lethal injection _not_ by natural causes as was released to the media. If _pirates_ placed that beacon," she leaned forward, "why the hell did Cerberus go so far to shut Kahoku up permanently? And why the hell was it damn near _identical_ to what happened on Akuze?" she demanded.

Jacob swore under his breath and was absolutely livid at the revelation.

"I can understand how you came to such conclusions. However you can be assured that Cerberus would not go to such lengths and risk the lives of valuable marines. There is another explanation I will be happy to investigate for you." Miranda responded as calmly as she could given the circumstances.

Shepard scoffed at her and sat back, "Let me guess, you'll ask the Illusive Man and he'll tell you whatever will make you happy to hear."

Miranda's eyes narrowed and she glared at the insufferable woman.

"My memory satisfactory enough for you?" Shepard growled, crossing her arms and shoving her hands under her arm pits to squash the biotic flares before they went dangerous. It was successful.

"How about something a bit more recent." Miranda was grateful for the topic change and she _would_ investigate Shepard's claims if only to refute them and earn her trust enough to work with professionally.

"Virmire. Saren's base of operations, you had to leave a man behind. Lieutenant Kaiden Alenko. Why did you choose him?" Jacob asked, hoping this question wasn't as much of a land mine. Her blazing red eyes glanced at him like lasers attempting to cut into his soul.

"I left a friend to die that day and I didn't do it casually." she asserted instantly. "I needed someone who could arm the bomb, he was the best man for the job. Before I could go back for him after pulling William's arse from heavy fire a Geth dropship landed at the bomb site. He armed the bomb ahead of schedule giving us barely enough time to hightail it out of there let alone go back for him. He made the choice to give his life for us and to stop Saren. He died a hero." She defended her actions and Alenko's passionately.

"Of that there is no doubt. No one here is questioning your judgement or his sacrifice, you made the right call. There are few people left with the courage to do what you both did." Taylor nodded to her, hoping his approval was clear to her as he was sincere in his words.

She glared at them, "Anything else you want to ask? Mindoir? Torfan? Elysium? Want to know how I feel about Batarians?"

Taylor looked to Miranda, "I don't think that's necessary. The memories are there Miranda, surely we don't need to ask anything else."

Miranda took a deep, calming breath. "Yes, it's been a stressful awakening and will take some adjusting." she acknowledged, they had a few hours at least before they reached the relay then another hour before they reached the station that had another really big surprise for Shepard.

For the next two hours Miranda and Jacob occupied themselves, Miranda with work, writing a report about what had happened and the results of the impromptu tests on Shepard, Jacob with some brain numbing games on his omni-tool.

Shepard simply stared out the window into empty space processing all that had happened and all she'd learned. Her body ached, she was a captive of _Cerberus_ and she'd lost two whole _years_. What in the stars had _happened_ during all that time? She had to find a way to contact Anderson but first she'd find out what the hell the Illusive Man wanted with her. And what had happened to her childhood best friend who didn't seem to recognize her.

Miranda and Jacob were both startled when Shepard broke the silence.

"I figure you've got a pretty extensive file on me Miranda." She spoke softly, her manner infinitely calmer than before.

"I know everything there is to know about you Shepard." Miranda smirked, her pride in her work coming across as arrogance but she didn't care.

"So you know that when I was sixteen my father was murdered. My mother and I were put into witness protection, we had to change our names, our identities, everything. I joined the Alliance to better protect myself and keep mum safe." She turned from looking out the window to catch the surprise in Miranda's eyes.

Miranda went from cocky to floored then scowled, "Your point?" she bluffed, she did not like being shown up, especially after her previous comment.

"What's my real name?" Shepard asked calmly.

"Your name is Stephanie Shepard." Miranda was internally seething, "There was exceptionally little information regarding your childhood available." she admitted, "Though I fail to see what relevance your childhood has with the current state of affairs. As I said, I know everything there _is _to know." she reiterated.

Jacob valiantly tried to hide his smirk.

Shepard took a deep breath, "It has a far greater impact on the current state of affairs than you realize, Miranda." she spoke with hidden meaning laced in her tone.

"Is there something about your father's murder I should be made aware of?" Miranda asked icily, glaring at Shepard.

"The reason why it's impossible to find any information about my childhood is because the man who murdered my father is an exceptionally wealthy businessman. My father wasn't actually the target. I was. At all of sixteen years old I was proving to be a thorn in the side of his master plan." she watched Miranda closely as she spoke, her still husky voice softly calm.

Miranda just listened, aside from the fact she should know this and it was killing her she didn't it _was_ rather fascinating.

"You see I made the fatal error in his eyes of being a _distraction_ to his daughter. I was interfering with his plan of shaping her into the perfect dynasty for his multi-trillion credit empire." she continued.

Miranda's eyes narrowed ever so slightly, there were very few people who could claim such a vast business empire. She should know, her father was one of them.

"Therefore I needed to be removed. At first he simply relocated my family. But she and I had promised to message every day. I kept my promise. I messaged her every day for two years. I never received a single reply from her but I did, however, get a message from her father warning me to cease all contact with his daughter. It was a message I ignored and as a result he tried to silence me permanently." she turned her gaze back out the window to the stars at the heaviness on her heart. Miranda clearly had no idea.

"I'm sorry for what you went through but I fail to see its relevance now." Miranda didn't see that it had any bearing on the Reaper threat or the fact that she was now a galaxy wide public figure.

Shepard's shoulders dropped slightly and she sighed heavily, "Then I'll stop boring you with ancient history that's irrelevant to your mission." there was no disguise in the sadness and _hurt _that filled her being in that moment.

Miranda could see that she had just missed something incredibly important, "I did not say it was completely irrelevant, I'm still waiting to see what relevance this information has."

Shepard looked back at her sharply, "Clearly nothing." she snapped, "How long until we reach the Relay?"

Miranda glanced at her omni-tool, "Seventy three minutes." The fact that Shepard had suddenly clammed up was like waving a red flag in front of her. She didn't like not having all the facts and there was something very personal about this for Shepard that could indeed impact her in the future.

"Alright, what changes did you make to my physiology?" Shepard well and truly shut the previous conversation down.

Miranda obliged her for now but filed it away for later. The rest of the trip was spent clinically going over the changes to Shepard, what she could expect, how they affected her performance and what she needed to be careful of. It took so long because Shepard wanted to actually understand the changes on a technical level, _how_ they'd done what they had to bring her back.

Shepard was incredibly impressed. She'd always known Miri was smart but this was _way_ beyond her best friend and first love had ever shared with her.


	3. Control

Shepard listened to what the Illusive Man had to say without interruption and wearing her carefully blank mask.

"Welcome back Shepard." He nodded to her. Tapping the end of his cigarette over the ashtray in the arm rest of his chair that was more like a modern day throne. His 'throne room' was a darkened room with little in the way of features bar an elegant holographic console that surrounded him and the clear view of the backdrop, a rather magnificent blue fiery gas giant that was seen through filters to enable a pristine picture of it. It was all geared towards a theatrical show of ultimate power.

Shepard would have shot him right between the eyes if she was physically standing in his presence, "Illusive Man." she greeted him neutrally.

"How are you feeling?" He attempted civility and it was clear he wasn't used to the concept.

"I've had better wake up calls, had worse too." She shrugged nonchalantly.

He smirked, a lopsided movement of his mouth that might have been considered charming in his youth and though he maintained an air of good looks it was all lost in the unnatural, mechanical blue eyes that were utterly soulless. "Good to hear, the galaxy needs you Shepard."

"I hear I cost you a substantial amount of credits. You could have trained an army for what you spent on me. Why'd you do it?" She asked cautiously.

"Because Humanity is under attack. The Council refuses to acknowledge the threat and the Alliance's hands are tied, not to mention there are remarkably few people who know what you and I know." He looked to her pointedly, getting to business quickly as it was clear she was in no mood for chit chat.

"Let me guess, the Reapers are up to something that you need me for." It was the only logical thing. The Council had wanted to blame the attack on the Citadel on Saren and the Geth, no mention of the Reapers when she'd been alive so it was no wonder that without her it was easier to sweep it under the carpet.

"Indeed. Someone is abducting entire human colonies out in the Terminus." He paused and waited for the response, it was ever so slight but her eyes darkened and her lips pursed a little tighter. "The Council and Alliance are simply blaming slavers and pirates, it's much easier that way. However, hundreds of thousands of humans have been taken without any sign of a fight taking place. There is no evidence whatsoever left behind, not a weapon scorch, not a drop of blood. The people have just vanished." he piqued her curiosity. "I believe it's the Collectors working as agents of the Reapers."

"And what makes you think it's Reapers? Last I checked they wanted to wipe us all out not harvest us." Shepard asked slowly as she processed this information. She knew very little about the Collectors other than they were a reclusive species that stayed out in the Terminus in small numbers, she wasn't even sure where they came from or what their home world was called, if they even had one.

"We've never truly known their intentions nor understood how they think. Besides this focussed attention only came about after _you_ killed one of them." he paused to take a drag from his cigarette to let her comprehend that.

Shepard stood for a moment, "The Reapers would be the only ones who have the technology to subdue entire colonies without a fight." she mused carefully, "The abductions are definitely something I'd be willing to investigate. _If_ I find evidence of Collectors or Reapers I'll be willing to put aside my dislike of your organization and work with you to stop them. If I do not find evidence, I walk and you have no claim over my expensive arse." She looked him firmly in the eye as she made herself very clear in where she stood, that she didn't give a damn about what _he_ put in to get her alive and wasn't about to be used like some lap dog at his bidding.

The Illusive Man was one hundred percent certain of the Collectors and nodded in agreement, "Deal. Freedoms Progress was just hit. I want you to take Miranda and Jacob and investigate it before the Alliance can get there and tamper with any evidence that may have been left behind."

Shepard's eyes blazed red from the cybernetics and anger at the _request. _"I've been conscious for under six hours after being _dead_ for two years and you..." She seethed but quickly regained control of her anger though her eyes continued to glow. "I understand. Anything else I need to know?" she growled.

"Miranda will brief you on anything further en route. We will talk again once your investigation is complete." He tapped his armrest console and the communication net vanished leaving Shepard in the small circular room.

Gritting her teeth she strode back out to where Miranda and Taylor were prepping for the mission, Miranda going over data while Taylor sorted weapons.

"Do you have everything you need to go over on the way?" Shepard asked softly but stepping easily into her Commander role that had defined the last few years of her life.

"Yes Commander." Miranda had only just heard her approach she moved so quietly even in the armour. She finished downloading the information to her omni-tool.

"When we get on board I'd like to know as much as possible about the other colonies that've been hit previously so I have an idea of what to expect and if there's anything that should grab my attention." she nodded to Miranda.

"Of course Commander." Miranda had anticipated that, after all these abductions had only started happening _after_ her death so she knew nothing about them. She caught the shift in Shepard's figure as she wrestled with obviously wanting to say something.

"Thank you for what you did Miranda, bringing me back..." Shepard began, her voice soft, she was searching for any sign of her old friend in this cold, unfeeling woman.

"It was my job." Miranda asserted quickly, they didn't have time for idle chit chat.

"All the same, you were in charge of the project and gave me back my life. Thank you." Shepard sighed, it was quite clear Miranda didn't want to talk about anything that wasn't mission related. Miri had always been focussed but this was different.

Miranda looked peeved, "I wasn't in charge. If I was I would have done things a little differently." her tone was cold and harsh.

Shepard subtly stiffened, bracing herself for what she had a feeling wasn't something she would be pleased at hearing, "And what would you have done differently?"

"For starters I would have installed a control chip but the Illusive Man didn't want anything that could interfere with your personality in any way. Nothing that would change the woman you were." Miranda flicked off her omni-tool and looked to Shepard coolly waiting for a response.

Shepard was appalled, she felt sick to her stomach that Miranda would even _consider_ doing that to someone. "I see." was all she managed to say through her suddenly dry lips as flashes of Batarians shoving their control chips in the heads of kids on Mindoir and Torfan came to mind immediately.

"The Illusive Man is putting a great deal of trust in you Commander, I _hope_ you don't let us down because I promise you if you do anything to compromise Cerberus or this mission I will kill you myself." Miranda took an almost sick delight in having obviously affected the _hero_ so much.

Shepard's eyes began to glow red as her anger seethed to the surface, "For someone who knows _everything there is to know_ about me, you sure are fucking stupid." she growled her dearest childhood friend.

Miranda's eyes narrowed and she tensed under that fearsome glare that could turn grown men into jelly.

Shepard took a menacing step forward, her biotics flaring with her rage, "Have you ever seen a slaver attack? Have you ever seen those fucking Batarian scum cutting open kids heads and shoving control chips in their brains? Have you ever heard their screams as the whole operation is done in under ten minutes without any anaesthetic or any kind of meds? Hell they barely take the time to shove the skin flap back over the wound. I watched my _friends_ get chipped and so much more." her voice was low, huskier and cold, so very cold.

Miranda lit hers up defensively in an instant, shivers tricking down her spine.

"And you have the gall to stand there with such disdain and arrogance _bitching_ about not being allowed to put a fucking chip in my brain? Threatening to kill me if I don't dance your little game?" her husky voice had dropped again into a menacing snarl that truly did put the fear of Shepard into Miranda. "I came over here to just _talk_ with you, to _thank_ you but clearly you have _no fucking intention_ of working _with_ me." she reached up and firmly tapped Miranda's forehead to which the woman took an instant step back from, "You'd better get your head on straight Miss Lawson because I'm not a lump of meat and tubes anymore thanks to you and being on my shit list is _not_ healthy. It's a very short list in fact because most people on it end up dead." She stepped back and forced down her biotics, "And I really don't want you on that list Miss Lawson so perhaps a little more thought before saying things that compare you to Batarian Slavers." she snapped before turning on her heel and stalking towards Jacob.

Shepard's response shocked her. There were no words for a long moment only her eyes and the set of her jaw. What she saw in those reddened amber eyes was not just anger but hurt, a deep chasm of emotional pain. Miranda frowned as she watched her go, the slight sagging of her shoulders, the heaviness of her footsteps. Surely her words shouldn't have had such a profound effect on the woman who'd made it clear that she hated Cerberus with a passion, surely Shepard understood it was merely a warning. There'd been no need to bring the Batarians... Miranda mentally cursed at her blunder, of _course_ that's where Shepard's mind would have gone at the mention of a control chip. That flash of pain in her eyes had been like the pain of seeing a dear friend turn on her, sure she'd spent two years learning Shepard's file but Shepard had only known her for a few _hours_. It didn't make sense and Miranda didn't like things that made no sense.

"Taylor, what've we got?" she looked down at the array of weapons on the table, trying very hard to keep her voice calm and not betray the roiling emotions within her.

"Reports say you favour a pair of heavy pistols as your primaries," he picked up a very nice looking Phalanx and held it out to her, "with a sub-machine pistol as backup." he motioned to them on the table.

Shepard looked over it quickly, her experienced eye seeing it was very fine. She clicked it in place on her hip magnetic hook, "What about you and Miranda?" she asked as she began to clip on her weapons.

"I take an assault rifle with the same backups as you, Miranda's primary is the sub and a hand cannon in addition to her badass biotics and tech skills. You really _don't_ want to piss off that woman." He smirked, his voice low enough that she couldn't hear from over at her console.

Shepard returned his conspiratorial smirk, "I can imagine."

Miranda joined them shortly to gear up and they were moving out in under ten minutes for Freedom's Progress. The true test of whether or not Shepard was going to play ball with Cerberus or kick them out on their arses for which Shepard had no qualms in doing. _Especially_ after what _Miranda_ had made abundantly clear to hear.


	4. What is Freedom?

Touching down on the cold planet that was currently only just entering dawn at the colony they found it to be eerily deserted.

"It's a ghost town." Taylor muttered as he followed Shepard and Lawson warily.

"Minus the ghosts." Shepard agreed as she led them through a habitation module that had half eaten meals on tables, a shower was still running somewhere and everything looked as though the occupants would simply be around the corner innocently distracted by something.

"Looks like they just got up and left." Taylor put his hand over the food to determine that yes it was cold now.

"This is... disconcerting." Miranda murmured torn between keeping an eye on their surroundings and on Shepard.

Shepard said nothing. Taking a left outside the module she led her small team towards the warehouse district. Approaching a large industrial sized bulkhead she came to a halt as her danger sense tingled in the back of her neck. Wordlessly she motioned for the pair behind her to take up position either side of the door.

Wondering why she was giving such orders they obeyed anyway and nodded when they were ready, their weapons already drawn.

Shepard hit the door release, which was in the centre of the door, and warily looked around. The clicking of mechs coming online was loud in the stillness of the morning. Jogging forward quickly to take cover behind a couple crates she located the source of the noise. "Two LOKI mechs coming online directly opposite the doors." she murmured, "Two more around to the right and it sounds like two Fenris mechs as well. Miranda can you overload their shields?"

"Yes." came the stiff response.

"On my mark do it, Taylor you shoot 'em down. I'll take the ones on the right." She ordered quickly.

"Got it." Taylor prepared in an instant for combat.

"Mark." Shepard muttered. Less than a heartbeat later there was a blue flash that had the mechs freezing up. Shepard ducked around the crates and her Phalanxes roared to life with a vengeance. The force of them sent one mech flying back as Taylor opened fire on the vulnerable mechs to her left. Her next shots sent the second mech crashing over the barrier behind it while the two Fenris mechs charged.

Miranda slowed their attack with a second overload and opened fire with her sub pistol without having to be ordered to by Shepard.

Shepard crushed the mech that was getting back up again with a warp then added her fire to Miranda's to down the dog imitation Fenris mechs before they could get close enough to hit them with their stunning electrical attacks.

"These mechs shouldn't have attacked us, we're human." Taylor pointed out in confusion.

"It appears we're not the only ones here. Did we detect any other ships?" Shepard glanced at Miranda as they both rose from their crouched positions with the threats eliminated.

"The shuttle doesn't have that capability." Miranda shook her head, also a little annoyed at the thought of someone else beating them here.

"Well then, let's see if we can find our elusive companions before they set more mechs on us." Shepard continued on at an even faster pace though her muscles screamed at her in complaint. She was actually thankful for the visor as it filtered the light for her sensitive eyes and thanked the stars for the armour's pain numbing agents that kept her moving for battle.

They fought their way through two more groups of mechs, Miranda proving to be quite the operative and not simply a brilliant scientists. Shepard was smiling beneath her helmet when Miranda blasted one mech over the edge of the canyon to their left with her biotics. It was eerily reminiscent of a particular childhood memory of stargazing.

Finding their competition shortly thereafter all three humans were quite stunned to see _Quarians_ gathered over a fallen mech studying it.

The Quarian marines shouted and instantly drew their weapons at the sight of the Cerbeus logos on Miranda and Taylor.

"Put your weapons down, I said _I'd_ handle it!" A very familiar voice commanded firmly from a slender young Quarian moving between the two sides.

Shepard immediately put away her pistols and motioned for the others to stand down.

Tali looked over the three humans, "We're not here to fight or cause trouble. One of our own was here for his Pilgrimage and is currently hiding from everything out of fear. All we want is to find him and return to the Flotilla." she attempted to be diplomatic with the humans. Shepard had taught her that there were good humans out there and though these belonged to Cerberus they _might_ at least have a shred of decency somewhere in them.

Shepard pulled off her helmet and as she did Miranda glanced at her in annoyance.

"This Quarian could have information about what happened here." she pointed out quickly.

"So we ask him about it then Tali takes him home." Shepard returned, knowing exactly what Miranda was insinuating and not having a bar of it.

Tali's jaw dropped open in her suit and her eyes widened, "Shepard! You're-you're _alive!_" she gasped in shock.

"Alive and kicking as of," she glanced at her omni-tool, "eight hours ago. Takes a couple years to bring someone back from the dead apparently. Then I was woken up before being fully healed by explosions from a mole trying to sell my body to the Shadow Broker. Today has _not_ been one of my best mornings." she was attempting to try and stave off the grin for as long as possible, taking in the dear Quarian before her. "This," she pointed to her scarred and slightly glowing face, "is very uncomfortable."

Tali smirked, "I bet. So... Cerberus rebuilt you?" she glanced warily at the woman who was looking very annoyed right now.

Shepard understood the depth of the question, "We have an... understanding at the moment. This is not the first human colony where all the humans have been abducted without a trace. _Hundreds of thousands_ of our people have been taken." she let that sink in.

"Oh keelah." Tali murmured in horror, she hadn't known that at all.

"The Illusive Man has a theory that I'm looking into, if it turns out to be correct then I'll agree to not blow up the next Cerberus base I find and concentrate on Collectors, who've really pissed me off with wanting to _buy_ my arse like some trophy." Now she looked angry and her cybernetics lit up, "If they're behind these abductions I'll do what's necessary to bring them down, even work with Cerberus."

Tali nodded, this was really big and it was something Shepard would do if she only had no other option, "The Council or Alliance aren't doing anything?"

"They think it's just slaver attacks. But look around, you see _any_ evidence of a fight bar the mechs? People wouldn't just up and walk out with slavers, they'd fight tooth and nail before either being killed or taken. Lots of weapons scorching, blood, bodies, in short a very big mess. Here." she gestured towards the window, "Nothing. But just like the Reapers the _Council_ doesn't want to see it. It's a _human_ problem. The Alliance takes its cues from the Council, ignore the problem, it'll stop eventually."

"Yeah, when there are _no humans left_." Taylor grunted.

Shepard took a step forward and the marines lifted their weapons again, she stopped. "Tali, we're not going to take the kid, I just want to know what he saw. All I need is confirmation on _what_ took the humans." she tried to soothe them.

Tali considered her, she looked like Shepard, talked like Shepard but _was_ she really Shepard? "Only Shepard knows what my Pilgrimage gift was. What was it?" she asked firmly.

"Geth data." She answered simply.

Tali relaxed immediately, she ran into Shepard's arms and burst into tears.

Shepard held her with a smile, the Quarian only barely passed her shoulder, "So did you get the Neema?" she asked softly, cradling the young woman against her like a lost child and feeling a sense of the familiar, that everything was going to be alright.

Tali nodded.

"So Tali'Zorah vas Neema nar Raaya. Very nice ring to it." Shepard grinned in approval.

"Touching but we don't have time." Miranda growled from behind her.

Tali went to pull back but Shepard held her tighter, she could _feel_ the growl in the back of Shepard's throat and knew that Shepard and this woman were _not_ on friendly terms. She smiled at that fact and hugged her tighter, sniffling from the tears.

"So I take it you guys have a better idea of what's ahead. Thoughts?" Shepard didn't comment on or even respond to Miranda's interjection.

Tali detected the unusual low note of Shepard's voice and pulled back again, this time Shepard let her, "Well Veetor has taken refuge in the warehouse district and activated the security mechs. It would be best to split into two teams..." she began but one of the marines interjected angrily.

"Now we're working _with Cerberus_!" he snarled at her.

"No Prazza." Tali snapped back at him, "You're working for _me_ if you can't handle that get back on the ship." she growled at him firmly.

He backed down quickly but with great reluctance.

"I get the strangest feeling that Cerberus has somehow offended the Flotilla." She cast a wry glance at Miranda.

"They attacked one of our ships." was all Tali growled in explanation.

"Ooh." That was all the explanation needed, Quarian ships were like their souls. You did _not_ mess with their ships.

"That's not how I would have described it." Miranda returned snidely.

Shepard simply held up her hand for silence from the woman, "Let me guess, they had something Cerberus wanted so you figured you'd just _take_ it and the Quarians objected." she scoffed, "Tali you take your team west, we'll go east. Anyone fires stray shots in either direction I'll sit on you so fast you'll be seeing stars for a week." her gaze rested on Miranda in a silent communication that was clearly articulating _especially you_.

Miranda barely nodded but could see Shepard had understood the subtle response.

"Yes Commander." Taylor instinctively resorted back to his Alliance training at her commanding tone.

Shepard turned to Prazza, "Tali how many Cerberus facilities did we wipe out?"

"Five." Tali answered without hesitation.

"What did we do to the Cerberus operatives inside them?" she asked, not taking her eyes off the marine.

"Killed them."

"About how many?"

"Keelah, over a hundred I'd guess but I wasn't really counting." Tali glanced at the Cerberus operatives, the dark skinned man looked uncomfortable, the woman was stone faced and unreadable.

"So the fact that these two Cerberus operatives are still breathing?"

"Means they're important for something and under your protection." Tali reasoned.

"And what lengths will I go to for the people I protect?"

"Uh, anyone who crosses them tends to die rather quickly and painfully." Tali smirked beneath her mask at what Shepard had just done. She'd made it very clear that she was no friend of Cerberus but the two people with her were needed for something therefore were off limits or there would be bloody hell to pay, as the humans phrased it.

Shepard hadn't taken her eyes off Prazza for a second and he was wilting under her gaze, "So is there going to be a problem, _marine_?"

"No ma'am." he mumbled.

"Good, as Operative Lawson pointed out we don't have much time. Should the Alliance get here your Veetor will be taken into custody for a full investigation. You don't want that. I don't want that. So let's go." she put her helmet back on and quickly synced communication frequencies with Tali.

They'd just taken out a series of security drones and were on approach to the loading area of the warehouse district where Tali had detected Veetor was located when a panicked Tali spoke up quickly.

"_Shepard, Prazza's gone on ahead, I told him to wait but he wouldn't listen. He wants to get to Veetor before you but Veetor's reprogrammed a heavy mech and it's tearing Prazza's squad apart!_"

Miranda hissed, "Bloody Quarians, we should have known they'd turn on us." she shot a pointed glare at Shepard.

They could hear the gunfire from where they were which was quickly followed by screams even as Miranda spoke.

"We're coming Tali, just keep your head down, maybe yell abuse at Prazza for me, I love it when you start cussing in Quarian." Shepard smirked beneath her helmet, "Come on, you know you want to call him a bosh'tet."

Immediately they were subjected to Tali hurling abuse at the errant marine.

Shepard had to stifle her chuckle but it was effective in snapping Tali out of her panic.

Taylor even smirked.

Sprinting through the outskirts of the warehouse district they followed the sounds of gunfire and quickly came across the heavy YMIR mech standing at a massive ten feet tall armed with a powerful machine gun and rocket launcher with heavy armour as well as shields protecting it. It was ripping through the Quarians like tissue paper. They got there just in time to see it hammer Prazza, filling the Quarian with so many bullets his chest was a spray of blood as he was thrown against a large transportation crate.

"This is going to be a son of a bitch to take down." Miranda observed coldly, the Quarian's got what they deserved in her mind.

"Tali we're here. You and Miranda deal with its shields. Taylor dance with it around those crates, keep it distracted, I'm gonna cut through the packing section and flank it through that module." she gestured her instructions crisply then quickly set off as the mech was running out of Quarians to play with. She heard the sizzle of the shields being assaulted by an overload, heard Tali sending her drone after it, heard Taylor open fire on it with his assault rifle and heard the explosive fire of the mech's machinegun. She could smell and taste the acrid burning of weapons fire, the metallic hint of blood from all the dead or injured Quarians, the smell of the coolness of morning that was being burned away by the rising sun. All of these things hummed through her senses and built up a battlefield in her mind, she could see it all without needing to use her eyes, she could dance through it with her eyes closed even though she'd never been here before. She smiled to herself, she still had her battlesense and it was sharper than ever before from her own heightened senses from the Lazarus Project. Then the fight was on.

The shields dropped under the combined assault of the tech specialists who now began to work on its armour plating with Taylor.

"Miranda can you warp?" Shepard asked suddenly, taking her position in the module looking down over the field and unnoticed by mech just yet.

"Of course." Miranda scoffed at being asked such a thing.

"Ever seen what happens when you hit a singularity with a warp?" Shepard was charging up her biotics already.

Miranda paused, "Sounds intriguing." she'd never seen it done before.

"I'm gonna hit it with a singularity you count to six then hit it with a warp." Shepard had always excelled at her biotics, she was grace, efficiency and power all in one. Pulling out the mnemonic movement she wrapped the mech in a gravity defying singularity that was so powerful the massive mech was lifted from the ground.

Taylor's jaw dropped and his eyes widened at the sheer _strength_ Shepard was exerting on the machine. He could lift things biotically but that was basic compared to what they were seeing.

Miranda was also impressed though she knew that Shepard's biotics had been boosted To her this was evidence of the success of the procedure and not of Shepard's abilities in and of themselves. Counting to six she lashed out a heavy warp right at the heart of the pulsating core of dark energy.

It was a biotic _explosion_ that ripped the mech apart so completely it was literally shrapnel.

Everyone took cover as the entire area was pelted with jagged bits of metal.

"That was _incredible_." Taylor actually laughed out of sheer awe.

Shepard smirked and wasn't going to comment, but Miranda took the opportunity.

"We boosted Shepard's biotics if you recall, increased power and length of time she can manipulate dark energy." she reminded him curtly.

Jacob frowned at her, "You enhanced what she already had, you didn't suddenly _give_ her biotics Lawson." he pointed out.

Miranda glared at him but said nothing more.

Shepard was pleased with Taylor coming to her defence so she decided to just let the slight on her abilities by Miranda just slide for now. Instead she sought out Tali who was in the module opposite her tending to some injured Quarian's she'd managed to get out of the mech's path.

"Nicely done Shepard." Tali nodded up at her.

"Team work always kicks arse." Shepard smiled, taking off her helmet, "I'd offer you help getting your people back to the Flotilla but I doubt the Illusive Man would be that generous. What do you need me to do?" she asked softly.

"Veetor's in the control room just over there. I'll handle this, you talk with him." Tali gestured towards the aforementioned shed and quickly continued her ministrations on the bleeding out Quarian.

Shepard gave her shoulder a squeeze, "I'm in charge of this operation so don't listen to anything Miranda might try to say about taking Veetor, he's going home _not_ to a Cerberus interrogation chamber." she muttered firmly before heading out as Tali had directed.

Tali's heart fluttered. She was now sure in her heart that it really was Shepard... and that Shepard was in big trouble. She knew Shepard would _never_ willingly work with Cerberus if she had a choice.

Shepard found the door to the control room was secured and glanced at Miranda.

Miranda nodded and activated her omni-tool. The door was soon swishing open.

Inside was dark except for the bank of screens on the back wall that cast enough light to show a jumpy Quarian working on the console.

"Mechs will protect. Must stay hidden. Mechs will protect." he was muttering to himself.

"Veetor?" Shepard called to him softly, not wanting to overly startle him. It looked like he was compiling something, visual footage that was showing the abduction of the colonists... by Collectors. Shepard's heart sank, "Shit." she muttered to herself and strode forward.

"Collectors. The Illusive Man was right." Miranda nodded towards the screens, her voice soft but firm. Shepard couldn't argue with this, especially considering it was a _Quarian_ who complied this evidence clearly _not_ a Cerberus deception.

Shepard gently put her hand on Veetors shoulder.

Veetor cried out and whirled around, almost falling over but that hand kept him steady. He swung out to punch wildly at the intruder but his wrist was caught.

"Veetor calm down, you're all right Veetor, you're safe now Veetor, help is here." Shepard soothed him, hoping that saying his name repeatedly would get his attention.

He sobbed and stopped struggling, "You're, you're human, how did you escape them?" he gulped down air.

"Veetor look at me and take a nice slow deep breath. With me now, breathe in," Shepard breathed in, "breathe out." she exhaled slowly, releasing him as she did.

The young Quarian did so and slowly began to calm down.

"A bit better now?" she asked with a smile.

He nodded.

"Okay, we only just got here so missed the attack. I know this will be difficult for you to talk about but I need to know what happened. Can you tell me what you saw?" she asked slowly, her voice gentle and calm.

He whimpered and wrung his hands but nodded, turning to the console he brought up what he'd been working on, "Seekers, swarms and swarms of seekers. They stung the colonists and the colonists just stopped moving." he nodded to the screen.

The three humans watched as screaming colonists were paralysed by what looked like large wasps the size of two average human fists.

"Then they came, they took them, put them in pods, took them away." he whimpered and began shaking again.

Shepard put her hand on his shoulder again, "May we have a copy of this please Veetor? It would be very helpful." she soothed.

He nodded and activated his omni-tool, "Yes, yes of course..."

"I'm Commander Shepard." she supplied when he glanced at her realizing he didn't know her name.

"C-Commander Shepard? The-the saviour of the Citadel?" he gaped at her, hand frozen over his omni-tool.

Shepard smiled ruefully, "Told you, you were safe." she winked.

He blushed under his mask and mumbled unintelligible words.

"The data please Veetor and anything else you can remember would be helpful." she got him back on track and activated her omni-tool for him to transfer the data across.

"There was a-a loud crack, like thunder just before- just before the seekers. I took scans, lots of scans." he nodded, his fingers working quickly.

"Probably their ship entering atmo." Taylor interpreted.

"Their swarms didn't find me, I-I hid in here. The screams..." Veetor began to shake again.

Shepard touched his shoulder once more, "If you didn't hide you wouldn't be able to give us this and we wouldn't know who was taking our people. This isn't the first colony they've attacked but until now there's been no clue left behind as to who took them. Thanks to you, Veetor, we now know and can do something about it. This data will save thousands of lives. Thank you. If you were taking a human pilgrimage this gift would get you any ship in our fleet." she put her fist to her chest in a Quarian salute.

Miranda rolled her eyes. If it were up to her she'd just grab the Quarian and leave, let someone else get the information out of him more efficiently than the Commander was currently doing, making him remember things he might have blocked out our didn't think important.

"Oh, oh really? I... thank you. Thank you Commander Shepard." he stood a little taller, calmer and the fear in him seemed to melt away under her touch and words.

Taylor was very impressed with her. This was nothing like a Cerberus operative would do to get the information needed, they'd force it out of their victim through any means necessary, asking nicely was a forgotten art.

"If you think of anything else that might be helpful, no matter how small, send me a message or send it to Tali'Zorah vas Neema nar Raaya." Shepard smiled and nodded as the data transfer continued, he'd taken a lot of scans and samples.

"T-Tali'Zorah? _The_ Tali'Zorah?" he gaped at her, he'd never met her but every Quarian who'd gone on pilgrimage since her return had been regaled with tales of her exploits and how she'd been side by side with Shepard as she saved the galaxy from Saren and the Geth.

Tali cleared her throat awkwardly in the doorway.

"Speak of the angel." Shepard smirked, her eyes sparkling.

"Hello Veetor." Tali's voice was all smiles as she approached. She'd done what she could for the injured and though she trusted Shepard she _didn't_ trust Cerberus.

"Tali'Zorah!" he squeaked in surprise.

"This young man was about to tell me all about the heroic exploits of one gorgeous Tal'Zorah nar Raaya." she grinned at Tali, putting her arm around the shorter Quarian's shoulder.

He made a strangled cry of embarrassment and disbelief.

Tali burst out laughing, "Leave the boy alone Seph." she scolded playfully, knowing full well that Shepard was doing what she did best in easing the tension.

Shepard smiled and gave his shoulders a squeeze, glancing down at her omni-tool as it beeped to register the end of the transfer. "Tali's gonna take you back to the Flotilla. Tali this data Veetor's collated shows that Collectors are taking humans and how they've done it. Little's really known about the Collectors and the Illusive Man seems to think they're working for the Reapers as they've only been taking humans since we killed Sovereign." she held up her wrist, "Cerberus will go over this data but anything your people could find out would be greatly appreciated." she shot Miranda a 'don't even think about it' glare when she went to speak.

Miranda clenched her jaw and remained silent. The files had said that Tali and Shepard were close, she hadn't realized _how_ close until just now. No one except her inner circle of a small handful of people were allowed to call Stephanie Shepard, 'Steph', she assumed the accent was why it sounded like 'Seph' when Tali said it and it didn't seem to bother Shepard.

"Of course." Tali processed it quickly _that_ was why Shepard was willing to work with Cerberus. They believed her about the Reapers, were they wanting her to lead an investigation and attack force against them? Against the Collectors? "Shepard... can we talk privately?" she asked softly.

Shepard looked to Miranda and gestured with a tilt of her head to the door.

"I can't do that Shepard." she stated flatly.

"I promise no undermining Cerberus, no plans to escape. I gave my word if the Collectors were behind this I'd toe the line. Tali is a friend and has valuable contacts to help. Now I'm going to ask nicely one more time before I throw you out on your arse." Shepard's voice was stern and she glared heatedly at Miranda.

Miranda stepped towards her with eyes narrowed and fists clenched, "I'd like to see you..." before she could even finish Shepard's fist lashed out and smacked her so hard in the jaw her head snapped back and she blacked out.

Jacob guffawed, "Oh she is so going to kick your arse for that." he clapped her on the shoulder, "I wish I'd recorded it." he chuckled, striding over to pick up the unconscious woman.

"Sedate her for me would you please Jacob. I want her waking up on the station and not before. She's less likely to go biotic demon on my arse if it'll kill everyone else around us." Shepard was grinning from ear to ear.

Jacob nodded, "Yes ma'am."

Tali laughed as after sedating the woman he lifted her up and put her the unconscious woman over his shoulder.

"Would you, would you like me to go to?" Veetor asked nervously.

"Just wait outside the door thank you Veetor." Tali nodded and was very grateful that he dashed out quickly. When she looked back to Shepard her heart broke at the distraught look on her face now that they were finally alone. Activating a small cone of silence around them she nodded, "Talk to me Seph, no Cerberus bugs will be listening in."

Shepard threw her arms around Tali and only barely refrained from bursting into tears, "Tali I... goddess the Normandy being attacked only happened for me a few hours ago. I've been fighting for my life ever since I woke up and now I've got a fucking Cerberus leash around my neck. I gave my word if the Collectors were behind these attacks I'd do everything I could to stop them and Cerberus will most likely give me everything I need. But it's fucking _Cerberus_. Akuze..." her voice was ragged and she breathed out the last word that had completely changed her world.

Tali held her trembling form, "Oh Seph, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. What can I do?"

Shepard took a deep breath, "Contact Anderson, tell him everything, but also tell him I'll do everything in my power to stop the Collectors, I'll _never_ join Cerberus. I'll kill myself first." she scoffed, "Then again, they'll just resurrect my sorry arse more likely so Miri can kill me herself."

"Miri? That woman Miranda?" Tali pulled back to look at Shepard curiously.

"You know she's supposed to have perfect memory, but she has no idea who I am. She thinks just like the rest of the galaxy that I'm nothing more than Stephanie Shepard, hero of the Citadel. She's forgotten that we knew each other a long time ago." she smirked wryly, "Funny story. Miri Solheim was my first love. We promised to write every day when my family was sent away, I did for two years. Never got one back from her but her father sent me one telling me to stop or bad things would happen. I was a rebellious teenager and didn't listen. He sent an assassin after me, killed my dad. Now she doesn't fucking know me and threatened to kill me if I do anything to turn on Cerberus. Go figure that one out."

"Oh Seph." Tali squeezed her arm sympathetically. "That's horrible!"

"When we knew each other she was so full of life, so bright and friendly and compassionate and amazing. Now she's a stone cold bitch working for terrorists. What the fuck happened to her?" Shepard rubbed the back of her neck deep in thought, partially turning away from Tali.

Tali was silent for a long moment, unsure what to say. Stepping up to her she slid her hand up Shepard's shoulder, "Seph, be careful. You can't trust her, you can't trust any of them." she warned softly.

Shepard took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "I could really use you with me."

"Seph I can't. I really wish I could but I've got an important mission of my own on Haestrom in Geth space. I can't leave it to anyone else." Tali felt so horrible at the drop of Shepard's shoulders.

"Geth space?" Shepard was instantly concerned and looked to her friend with worry etched into her features.

"I... I wish I could tell you more but..." Tali lowered her face, wringing her hands.

"Cerberus. I understand." Shepard reached out and touched the chin of the young woman's mask. "You ever need help I don't give a shit about Cerberus, I'll come for you." she promised with complete sincerity and deep intensity.

Tali melted at that gaze, "I-I, thank you, that means so much to me." she sniffled as tears threatened.

"You're family Tali'Zorah." Shepard pulled her close for one last hug, "You be careful out there. No getting your arse shot off by geth or blown up by whatever it is you're doing on Haestrom. Got it?" she growled.

Tali smiled, "Yes Commander. You take care too." she murmured.

Shepard touched her forehead to the top of Tali's faceplate, it was a symbolic kiss on the cheek just between them before they parted ways. Tali back to the Flotilla and Shepard... Shepard back to the Cerberus space station and the Illusive Man with a heavy heart and lead feet.


	5. The Dance Begins

_**Wow. Stunned and stoked at the amount of hits this story is getting already. :D**_

_**You'll be pleased to know Gemini1179 that I've got the first twelve chapters mostly sorted and am sticking to around 2-3000 words a chapter. Just going over them to make sure they flow. As for Miri hiding... he he he should have put a major angst in the descriptor cos things are not going to be sorted between them for awhile yet. Not even sure if these two are destined just yet, they might have to much between them...**  
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_**Hope you all enjoy!  
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><p>"Was it really necessary to sedate Operative Lawson?" The Illusive Man asked, though his lips curled in a small smile at not only the audacity of Shepard but that she had actually been able to do it. No one had <em>ever<em> gotten the upper hand on Lawson in anything he'd been privy to, and he was privy to much, more than even Miranda herself was aware of.

Shepard gave the faintest little smirk, "She practically dared me to knock her out. I figured it would be safer to sedate her until we got here, if she woke up on the shuttle I doubt any of us would have returned."

The Illusive Man actually smiled, "Indeed. What was the altercation about?"

"Tali asked to speak with me privately. I asked Operative's Lawson and Taylor to wait outside. Lawson refused so I told her to get out or I'd throw her out on her arse. She didn't take to well to that and told me she'd like to see me try. So I did. I didn't think I hit her that hard, she was out cold before she'd hit the deck." she self consciously rubbed the back of her neck, looking a little abashed by it. Secretly though it had felt _really_ good, quite cathartic in fact.

"And what did Tali'Zorah want to discuss?" The Illusive Man nodded, he'd have to keep a close eye on their working relationship but at least Shepard appeared contrite over the incident.

"She wanted me to be able to freely tell her how I was feeling without Cerberus listening." she stood a little straighter, looking him in his soulless eyes.

The Illusive Man noted that she actually looked a hell of a lot calmer and more at ease with herself than last time. He would have to keep a very close eye on Tali'Zorah to ensure Shepard was indeed telling the truth.

"I needed it, just a chance to clear my head a little with someone I trust. Now the Collectors." she moved them to the reason for this talk, "I'm in." was all she said.

He nodded, that was all he needed to know. "Excellent. You'll need a team."

"I had a team." she frowned. Was he going to push _more_ Cerberus operatives on her?

"It's been two years, they're in different places now." He warned her nonchalantly.

"Granted but I can at least try." She asserted quickly, "Williams?"

"Is on a highly classified assignment for the Alliance." He'd been prepared for this so had done the necessary digging.

"Vakarian?"

"Disappeared not long after your death. No one has seen him for well over a year now."

"T'Soni?"

"Is an information broker on Illium and is mixed up with the Shadow Broker. I cannot risk her at this point in time considering the lengths the Broker has gone too to procure your body for the Collectors." he shook his head and tapped his cigarette.

She knew Liara would _never_ hand her to _anyone_ if she wasn't sure of their intentions, there was something going on there that the Illusive Man didn't want her pursuing just yet. "Wrex?" her heart was sinking.

"Is on Tuchanka rallying his people in readiness for the Reapers." It was wise and he didn't want to interfere with the Krogan.

Shepard exhaled, "Alright, got it. So I'm guessing Miranda's gonna be on my arse."

"She'll be your executive officer and reports directly to me." he nodded.

"And Taylor?"

"Will be your Gunnery Chief." he lifted the cigarette to his lips and took a drag.

Shepard waited, her eyes narrowing slightly at his arrogance.

"I'll be sending you some dossiers of people I would recommend. They are not Cerberus and you will have to impress them to get them to join you. But I have faith in your leadership abilities to do just that." he tapped the cigarette again.

Shepard nodded, not quite believing him but arguing would be pointless, "And a ship?"

"I think you'll like it, as well as the pilot. He's someone you can trust." he cast his small smile at her and nodded, "The Collectors come from beyond the unmapped Omega-4 relay. No ship that's gone through it has ever returned." he warned her gravely.

"Suicide mission. Standard operating procedure then." Shepard should have known it'd be something like this. Did he think that because he'd brought her back from the dead once he could do it again? Or that she was somehow invincible? Surely the fact that she'd _died_ last time should have clued him in on the fact she wasn't. Why did _everyone_ expect her to pull miracles out of her arse? She wasn't exactly a shining paragon figure after all, hell just ask the Batarians.

The Illusive Man smiled, pleased in her confidence, "I'll forward any information I can gather to Miranda. This mission is all yours Shepard. Do what you need to do, we brought you back because you are the best humanity has to offer. Humanity is counting on you." was all he said before tapping the console.

Shepard was already well aware that she was no longer alone and threw herself to the side as soon as the holographic wall began to dissipate. She just barely dodged Lawson's biotic attack and spun around lightly on her feet to grab Miranda by the wrist and slam her into the wall.

Miranda grunted, taken by surprise at how quickly Shepard had _moved_, she'd blinked and the woman had her pressed against the wall, both her wrists in hers, her hips pinning her in place.

"I'm going to let you go. I'd prefer it if you simply took a swing at me instead of mess up my insides. Fair's fair after all." Shepard drawled. A moment later she did indeed step back and simply turned her head in motion with the killer right hook, surprised at how well she just absorbed it. "Feel better?" she smirked coldly, looking into Miranda's furious cobalt blue eyes.

"What the _hell_ Shepard?" She hissed at her.

"I could ask you the same thing Miss Lawson. All Tali wanted was to ask me how I was coping _without_ you listening in. This might surprise you but given everything that's happened today I _needed_ to talk with someone I know I can trust, I _needed_ to vent my emotions where I felt safe. It helped me focus and come to grips with what's happening in a way _you_ can't provide. _Especially_ considering our earlier conversation about wanting to chip me and killing me if I sneeze wrong. You really can't expect me to share my heart with you for psychological evaluation after _that_." she growled at her angrily.

Miranda mentally swore at her mistake. She'd actually started making progress with the woman on the shuttle going through her upgrades and had well and truly ruined it in that heated moment. What about it had put her on edge like that? All Shepard had wanted was to thank her.

"Besides which you literally asked me to try and throw you out. I simply took you up on your offer and sedated you so that you didn't blow us up on the shuttle when you came to." she straightened her shoulders and assumed her Commander stance, "I'm not all that hard to get along with if you give me a chance. Treating me like a prisoner, however, is not going to do either of us any good. I've been given the latitude to do whatever I think is necessary for this mission which is bigger than Cerberus so I'm going to be using outside resources." she held up her hand when Miranda went to argue, "But that doesn't mean I'm going to be deliberately undermining Cerberus. I may hate what you do to achieve your goals but I'm not stupid. The Collectors and Reapers are more of a threat unless Cerberus or any of its operatives actively makes themselves one." she looked to Miranda pointedly.

Miranda straightened, nodding in understanding at the warning.

"So let me do what you spent two years bringing me back to do because clearly the Illusive Man doesn't think anyone else can." She hadn't intended it as a slight against Miranda but could see the woman had interpreted it as one.

Miranda hissed softly through her teeth at the reminder that the Illusive Man hadn't trusted _her_ with this mission, she was just the second in command after being in charge of Cerberus Operations for years.

Shepard stepped forward, closing the distance between them again, "You have the intelligence in spades Miranda but somewhere along the way you lost your heart." She reached out and put her fingertips over Miranda's heart, "You can't lead people into hell without showing a little heart."

Miranda was shocked at the intrusion into her personal space and the galling observation of a flaw in her perfect genes. Was that truly it? Her throat constricted as Shepard reached up and tenderly caressed her cheek, her eyes softening to become both tender and sad. She shoved Shepard's hand away, "I don't need your pity." she spat and pushed passed her.

Shepard firmly gripped her by the shoulder and stopped her in her tracks, "I'd never pity you, but it breaks my heart to see..."

Miranda turned abruptly as if to slap her but Shepard turned her face, _offering_ her cheek to be slapped. Her eyes narrowed and refrained from the motion, "Finish your sentence _Commander."_ she growled.

Shepard shook her head, "It doesn't matter. My heart has never mattered to you." she sighed cryptically and walked out.

Miranda's frown deepened, what did she mean by that? She was talking as if... as if they'd _met_ before but she knew sure as hell that she'd never met Commander Shepard. God this woman was frustrating the hell out of her.

Shepard was almost so lost in her thoughts she almost didn't notice the figure waiting for her outside.

"I see you survived the wrath of Lawson." A jovial voice sounded.

Shepard blinked at the man, then recognition hit and her entire face lit up, "Joker!" she moved towards him lightning quick and hugged him, careful of his bones.

Jeff blushed at her hug, "Commander." he mumbled.

"Goddess it's so good to see you! You got out alright then. I hoped you would." she pulled back, holding his shoulders and just taking him in.

He ducked his face, not able to meet her piercing gaze, "I'm so sorry Shepard. It's my fault you... you were..."

"Pfft." she lightly and playfully hit his cap so it spun around on his head, "Get over yourself. If you hadn't stayed at the helm as long as you did no one would have made it off." she was grinning, she didn't blame him at all for what had happened. Besides she hadn't actually had any time whatsoever to dwell on it.

He smiled shyly and fixed his hat. He cleared his throat and dropped the smile as Miranda stalked passed them, "So I get to show you something awesome!" he grinned at her once Miranda wasn't in his field of vision.

"Oh oh oh! You're letting me see your private collection! Joker I've been _dying_ to see it!" Shepard teased him with shining eyes and the biggest grin.

Joker went beet red, "That's so not funny _Commander_."

Shepard smirked, "Oh it so is and you know it." she waited for the chuckle and was rewarded with it. She started walking and he quickly fell in step with her, walking so much stronger than he had last time, Cerberus must have done something about his bones, reinforced them or something.

Joker glanced at her out of the corner of his eyes, this was what set her apart. She was the best in the field, was tactically brilliant but she could always make anyone feel better just with a few words. He bet she could even get the stone cold, stick up her arse Lawson to smile if she set her mind to it, granted she'd have to work really hard but if anyone could do it Shepard could.

"So why Cerberus?" she asked softly after a few minutes of quiet.

Joker sighed, "It all went to hell after you died Commander. _You_ were the glue that held us all together. Everyone was split up, records sealed and everything you dug up about the Reapers the Council wanted _gone_ then the Alliance grounded me. They fucking _grounded_ me Commander!" he snarled not at her but at the Alliance. "Hell yeah I turned Cerberus."

"Do you trust them?" she continued in her soft, contemplative voice.

"I don't trust _anyone_ who earns more money than I do, you and doc Chakwas being the only exceptions." he grinned at her but then became serious again, "They're the only ones taking the Reaper shit seriously. _Someone_ in this fucked up galaxy has to and even if it's a bunch of terrorists they're still a powerful bunch of terrorists and they're _doing _something about it. They let me fly, they brought you back and then there's this." he nodded to a large window they'd arrived at.

Shepard's eyes widened as the ship in the hangar was the same profile as the Normandy, somewhat bigger, probably twice the size in fact, but it was clearly a newly minted Normandy class stealth frigate.

"You weren't the only one they resurrected." Joker beamed in genuine excitement, "Only thing left to do is name her."

"She's already got a name, let's not mess with fate hey, she's a fickle mistress after all." Shepard grinned, her heart was a little aflutter, in a good way but she was also very aware that this ship, hell her _life_ came with strings attached so her excitement was greatly contained.

Joker chuckled, "Hell yeah, I was so hoping you'd say that. Normandy's back, you're back, it'll be just like old times Commander." he saluted her.

"Even down to the suicidal odds no doubt. Seems we get all the fun missions." she clapped him on the shoulder. "Is the crew on board yet?"

"Some, some are still coming, they've gotta name her too so it'll be a few hours before we can ship out." he nodded eagerly.

"Good, I've been conscious for twelve hours, I'm hungry, aching and so need a shower, preferably in medi-gel." she grumbled.

He looked to her scars and his heart ached, her beautiful face was still marred but she was alive, "Yeah, you woke up earlier than expected."

"Happens when some arsehole decides to attack the station and kills almost everyone on it before they're finished rebuilding me. I've been swimming in pain-meds." she murmured, "And they're wearing off, no happy place for me right now."

He grimaced, "Been there, definitely not fun. Come on then, let's get you on board."


	6. Scarless Beyond Recognition

Only a few people had been going over the final systems checks, they'd rushed to get the final fittings in place for the newly moved up schedule. Shepard was glad, she had no idea what she looked like but she figured right now it wasn't pretty.

A pretty, bubbly red head with sparkling green eyes had greeted her, introducing herself as Kelly Chambers her yeoman. She had her own yeoman! She did feel a little bad about rushing their meeting but bodily functions needed addressing so she asked where her quarters were and she was sent up to what they called the Loft. It was like being on a first class _cruise_ liner not a military ship. Upon entering the first thing she'd noticed was the blue glow of a huge aquarium that took up the majority of the portside wall. To the starboard side was her own bathroom and working space that had a very large display case that also served as a visual communications screen. The Loft was split into two areas, this upper area then down a couple steps was the living area. Flush against the display case was a black leather L shaped lounge with a medium sized coffee table. Past the 'lounge' was a massive queen sized bed that looked so inviting right now and her clothing and armour storage.

Exploring her private domain she found it was already fully stocked with clothes, all the right size of course, though they were all _Cerberus_ uniforms. They would need some... altering if she was going to wear them. She smiled as instead of finding Alliance style underwear she found an assortment of very comfortable, _nice looking_ lingerie. That was _definitely_ a Miranda touch. Grabbing a change of clothes she opted not for a shirt and simply took a white singlet that had no logo and black jogging shorts.

Putting her armour away she was in absolute heaven as the hot water washed over her sensitive skin and washed her hair. It was only when she began to dry herself that heaven shattered. For the first time she was looking down at her body. Her skin was _flawless_. Tentatively she ran her fingertips over her chest where one of her scars had been. She had been covered in scars, mostly from the Thresher Maws but a few bullet and knife wounds had marked her skin. They'd been battle scars, scars of honour, scars she'd worn with pride, scars that had told her story etched into her very flesh. Her scars were a part of who she was and now they were gone, they were simply not there. She could see them in her mind, could see what she was _supposed_ to look like and it threw her like nothing Miranda had told her about what they'd done to her had been able to do.

Miranda was getting impatient. She knew Shepard was on board. She'd sent her a message that they needed to meet to discuss the many things required for this mission and ship and Shepard was late. Eleven minutes late to be exact. "EDI, where's Commander Shepard?" she growled at the AI.

"In the loft Operative Lawson." EDI responded in her calm, feminine voice.

"Thank you EDI." Miranda was too annoyed with the woman to wait any longer. Storming up there she barged in without touching the door chime to warn Shepard of her presence and looked around. Eyes narrowing she didn't see her out here meaning she was in the bathroom. She didn't even consider just waiting, she'd been waiting too long already. Stepping into the bathroom she found Shepard just standing there naked staring at her reflection with a look of forlorn horror. Her anger softened, Shepard hadn't really seen her face yet and it was still rather scarred.

Shepard hadn't even heard anyone come in so when Miranda's voice broke through her quandary of disjointed thoughts she started and whipped her head around to the woman.

"The scars will heal in time Shepard." Miranda assured her crisply.

"How did you re-grow my skin?" Shepard demanded, ignoring the comment and that she was naked in front of Miranda, the woman had rebuilt her after all so had seen her naked for quite some time. Though truth be told it didn't even register in her mind that she was naked in front of another woman.

"Enhanced dermal regeneration, using your own cells to regrow the skin rather than using artificially grown skin." Miranda observed her closely, something was wrong and it wasn't about her face.

"So my scars should still exist." her tone was accusing and her cybernetics were flaring now.

"They could have, I opted to have them removed for you I thought you would appreciate..." she attempted to explain but Shepard cut her off, her tone was frigid.

"Right here was a knife wound from a Batarian pirate on Elysium, you know how that ended." her finger traced along her left forearm, "Here, here and here were bullet wounds from a raid on Blue Suns outpost, all mercs down, four marines injured, I was the worst because I was shielding a civilian who'd been taken hostage." she pointed to two places on her abdomen and one on her hip. "Most of my shoulder and upper back were scarred from Thresher Maw acid, also here from where I was struck by one of its tendrils and nearly lost my leg. Here I had burn scars from Batarian slavers on Torfan." she was cataloguing each scar she'd collected over the years for Miranda.

Miranda frowned she certainly wasn't expecting such ingratitude for her actions considering she'd done it to _help_ the blasted woman, "Yes, you had a lot of scars, want a medal for them?" she sneered.

Shepard glared at her only partially aware of how red her eyes were glowing right now, "They where my life's story etched into my flesh, they were reminders of what I've sacrificed, what I've lost, what I've _given_ in the line of duty and to protect others. They were a part of who I am, of my self-identity, of what makes me _me._" she hissed through her teeth, "And you _opted_ to _remove_ them. Why didn't you just give me blue eyes or blonde hair or tanned skin or a fucking _nose job_?" she yelled at Miranda, tears streaming down her face but she didn't give her a chance to respond, "Because you were ordered to bring me back as _me_! _EXACTLY_ as I was! These," she gestured to herself, "where _my LIFE_, my life you just _erased_ to make me look pretty." her voice hitched as she tried not to sob.

Miranda could scarcely keep her jaw from dropping or her eyes from widening at the emotionally enraged and distraught woman before her. She had never imagined that anyone would _want_ to be as scarred as Shepard had been, that Shepard had been so tied to her scars emotionally.

"They were a part of me I earned through blood a part of my _soul _and you... you..." she couldn't choke the words out through her tightened throat, her shoulders were shaking and her knees were growing weaker by the second.

All of Miranda's previous anger evaporated as Shepard broke down before her, turning from her and covering her eyes with one hand while the other steadied her wavering form on the basin. There wasn't even a way she could get them back for Shepard the genetic markers had been discarded. She had made a gross miscalculation, one that was tearing Shepard apart right now. That had _never_ been her intention. She might have issues with the woman, was incredibly frustrated with her but she still respected her, she had done what no other human had. Shepard had done everything _right_ with Saren and the Reapers, hell she'd even saved the Council when she could have left them to die. She made the tough calls and saw them through to the end ensuring they were tactically sound, what wasn't to respect about that? Everything she'd learned about Shepard had told her the woman was strong and determined, that she gave of herself above and beyond all that was expected of her and now, now she, Miranda Lawson, might have just completely screwed that up.

"Shepard, I'm so sorry, I had no idea they were so important to you." she apologized sincerely, swallowing the lump in her throat.

Shepard was desperately trying to pull herself together. She was Commander fucking Shepard, she _didn't_ cry, especially not in front of other people. There was no point in asking her why, there was no point in demanding an explanation really as there was no way to change this. Her scars, that part of her self was gone. "Why are you here Miranda?" she whispered raggedly.

"We were supposed to meet to discuss the mission." Miranda cleared her throat softly, Shepard was still wet and for the first time she realized that the woman was actually very beautiful. For so long she'd just been a slab of meat on the operating table. Now she was a living, breathing being and her cheeks flushed with shame at not only not having seen that sooner but for her lack of respect for her in her anger. Perhaps it was also because of witnessing her in such a broken state and knowing she was the cause of it.

Shepard growled, her pain channelling into anger, "Of course that's all it bloody is to you isn't. The only reason you brought me back. The only thing I'm alive for. A bloody weapon for your personal disposal. Get out _Lawson_. We'll meet when I'm fucking ready." she hissed, gripping the basin with both hands and refusing to look at the woman.

Miranda wordlessly left, Shepard clearly needed time. Time they didn't have but right now it would have to be made. If Shepard wasn't ready emotionally this would have all been for nothing.

Shepard shakily dried herself off, she brushed her shoulder length chocolate brown hair missing her long locks that had been against military protocol for years. Tying her hair back she dressed and tried to mentally prepare herself for facing Miranda again. It was so hard. She decided there was only one way she could do it.

To say that Miranda was surprised when Shepard turned up in her quarters in her _armour_ was an understatement. "Should I be worried?"

"This is the only thing that _doesn't_ have a Cerberus logo on it, at least that I've seen. I'd like that fixed even if it means ripping them off my clothes. I agreed to work _with_ you not _join_ you." Shepard returned curtly.

Miranda nodded, "I'll have Miss Chambers see to it."

Though Shepard was icy cold they worked through what needed to be done efficiently and effectively. Miranda was also pleased that Shepard's mind was sharper than most she'd worked with and she thought through things differently. She swallowed her pride when Shepard suggested alternatives to things she put forward and though she felt challenged she thrived on challenges. As Shepard left, still ice cold in demeanour, Miranda knew that if they were going to work together she needed to give ground to the Commander, and fast. She'd never been on a project like this before, where she felt almost _incompetent_ in dealing with the subject. It was so much _easier_ when she was just meat on a slab being put back together. Now every step she took seemed to blow up in her face even when she was _trying_ to be helpful. It was bloody frustrating to the Operative who was supposed to be perfect. She'd done so much research on Stephanie Shepard she'd just about written the bloody manual on her, a clinical and detailed biography of the life of the most famous human to date. And it was useless. Another approach was required and she needed to find it as quickly as possible.


	7. Smooth

Shepard was inspecting the armoury, checking out their weapons and putting Taylor through his paces amicably.

When they were done Taylor cleared his throat a little uncomfortably, "So all that stuff you said about Cerberus back on Freedom's Progress... is it true?" he asked cautiously.

"Yes." Shepard answered honestly and calmly.

There was a pause, "You were going to kill me back at the Lazarus base when I told you about being Cerberus weren't you." it was a statement, not a question. He'd seen it in her eyes, that moment of confliction, the flicker of movement of her weapon that thankfully had remained lowered.

"Yes." again her honest answer was calm as she observed the uncomfortable man.

"What stopped you Shepard?" He asked slowly, already his mind was ticking over possible answers but he wanted to hear it from her.

Shepard took a deep breath, "Several things. You were honest which is something I'd never encountered in a Cerberus Operative." she hesitated before continuing on, "And the first time I woke up when Wilson had mixed up the meds there was genuine concern in Miranda's eyes." she scoffed, "Little did I realize it was just because her precious project was in jeopardy." she grunted wryly.

"Yeah, she _is_ a little task oriented. But that's why she's the best." he shrugged, he didn't really want to get into a bitch session about Miranda Lawson, she was an incredible woman under that outer shell if she let you in.

Shepard shook her head, but stopped herself from saying anything that might reveal she knew Miri better than they realized. "So you don't strike me as the typical Cerberus guy."

He nodded curtly, "Alliance Corsair."

"Really?" Now _that_ she could picture, he was military to the core. "What happened?"

"Political bullshit happened. Alliance sends you out to work under the radar keeping pirates and the like in check supposedly out of their jurisdiction but they tie you up with enough red tape you can't actually _do_ anything." he growled in disgust. "Yeah I know Cerberus crosses the line time and time again but they get things done without the tape and the Illusive Man knows not to ask me to do anything that crosses the line." he asserted quickly.

Shepard just listened as he vented, clearly he hadn't been able to as everyone he'd worked with was Cerberus but she, she was _Alliance_, she understood his perspective. "Sometimes a little red tape is needed to keep people like the Illusive Man in check." he was about to argue but she continued, "But I completely understand. Even when they made me a Spectre, above the law in order to achieve the best for the galaxy, they constantly tied my hands, the Alliance was the worst." she admitted sincerely.

Jacob nodded with a scowl at the mention of the Alliance, "They screwed you over Commander. For the first six months after you died you were the Alliance poster girl, they had your face on all the recruitments. But apparently you didn't _focus test_ right, they replaced you with a _composite_ when the Council started downplaying the Reapers. They made you out to be mentally unstable Commander." he scoffed and shook his head in disgust. "You're the best of us and they shamed your memory." he straightened his shoulders and looked to her resolutely, "Commander, I know you're hating this, hating to be working with Cerberus. But know that most of the crew on this ship are ex-Alliance. Some of them were drummed out of the service for their outspoken support of you. We've got your back, ma'am. We've seen what you can do and trust that you'll lead us to kick the Collectors right in the arse. We believe in you Shepard." he declared with devout sincerity.

Shepard was truly touched and actually smiled, "Thank you Jacob. I appreciate that. Really am glad I didn't kill you, you're great for my morale." she winked.

He chuckled, if he'd had paler skin he would've been blushing, "Me to ma'am. Uh, glad you didn't kill me that is."

Shepard smirked, "I'll leave you to your duties Jacob." she returned his salute and headed out to run almost straight into Kelly. Quickly she reached out and grabbed the woman by the shoulder's before she fell.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Shepard! I wasn't looking where I was going." Kelly gushed, going bright red in the face.

Shepard smiled, "No harm no foul." she reassured her, letting her go when she was sure she was steady on her feet.

"I was looking for you actually." Kelly straightened her shirt a little and looked up at the slightly taller woman. "I just got the message from Miranda about altering some of your clothes."

Shepard laughed, "Oh I was just going to rip the Cerberus logo's off but didn't really want to walk around with holes in them." she thumbed towards the elevator, inviting Kelly to come with her.

Kelly joined her eagerly. She hadn't quite believed it when she'd been hand picked by the Illusive Man to join Commander Shepard's crew. _Commander Stephanie Shepard_! Now here she was, about to join her up in her private quarters, sure it was for work but she doubted few would be allowed up in the loft once they got underway.

Shepard headed straight for the drawers and grabbed an armful of clothes, "I haven't sorted through them or anything so I don't know what's marked or not." she carried them over to the coffee table and just dumped them.

"That's alright I can do that." Kelly sat down and started sorting. It was a little strange to be going through the Commander's clothes like this.

"Oh I didn't expect that _you'd _actually do it, I just thought you'd arrange..." Shepard realized as Kelly produced a sewing kit.

Kelly grinned, "Four older brothers and two sisters, mending things was self preservation."

Shepard smirked and surprised the woman by sitting down on the other lounge looking at her, "Big family huh." the normal pang of talking families clutched at her heart but she was somewhat used to it by now and her emotions had been in such a constant state of flux since waking up on the Lazarus station she was feeling more and more _numb._

"Big and _loud_." Kelly nodded, "Keeping the peace was a constant job. It's where I picked up most of my observation and counselling skills."

"So you're my yeoman _and_ a counsellor?" Shepard was quite surprised by that.

"Not officially a counsellor though I do have a degree in psychology. My official role is your yeoman, but I'm also here to keep an eye on the mental health of the crew. This is going to be a tough mission and we all need to be at our best. I'm just a friendly face to vent to if needed, it works better that way." she shrugged and glanced at the Commander to find her studying her closely.

"Subtle Miranda, very subtle." Shepard muttered, shaking her head at how smoothly Miranda had arranged this. She had to hand it to the woman, she was good.

Kelly's brow rose, "Am I missing something?"

"Miranda is concerned about me but knows I won't be talking to her any time soon." she glared over at the aquarium, "Happens when you promise to kill someone if they step out of line once and openly declare they wanted to put a slaver ship in your skull." she growled.

Kelly winced, that was stupid on Miranda's behalf, what was she thinking?

"She barged in on me in the bathroom because I was late for a meeting I didn't even know about. She found me... rather upset about my scars, or rather _lack_ of them." she shifted uncomfortably, "She thought I'd appreciate having them removed. She was applying her own values and ideals onto me, _she_ wouldn't want scars so _she_ removed them. But they were a part of me, I wore them with pride and never considered them ugly or repulsive. I _earned_ them. They were my life's story written on my skin. A portrait of what I've done, where I've been, who I _am_. And she took it all away because she didn't like them, they marred her perfect little project."

Kelly watched as Shepard stood and began to pace, she could see why Miranda wanted her to speak with Shepard. Did Miranda realize just how deeply she had affected Shepard with that procedure? "Would you like to talk about how you feel? Or just vent?" she asked softly, it was too early to really dig deeper, they'd only just met.

Shepard scoffed, "I _feel_ like a piece of my soul was ripped away and I can never get it back. That it was _her_ makes it hurt even more. She values perfection over raw life..." she sighed and walked up to the empty aquarium, leaning against it, "I wasn't a person to her on that operating table, I was a slab of meat to be manipulated. An enhanced biological weapon for the sole purpose of fighting Collectors and Reapers. No other reason. No other purpose. It didn't matter that I'm a human being, that I've had a past, that my past determines who I am. She stripped that from me. It's as though she wants me to forget, forget who I was, forget that I'm an Alliance marine, forget I'm a Spectre, forget everything but the Reapers. To forget my past as she's forgotten hers." her voice was soft, forlorn as she voiced what had been tearing her apart since seeing her reflection.

Kelly sat a little straighter, the clothes all but forgotten, "What would make you think that she's forgotten her past? That she wants you to forget _yours_?" this was harder on the woman than she'd been letting on obviously.

Shepard bowed her head pinched the bridge of her nose, she'd said too much already. "It's nothing, I'm being melodramatic and moody. Miranda Lawson appreciates perfection, she just thought I would as well. I just need to get my head on straight, it's a lot to process that I... died and two years have passed and everything is different, even me." she snorted, "I think I need to go hit something. Always makes me feel better." she didn't think they'd have a piano anywhere for her to soothe her rawness on.

Kelly filed it all away for later. There was obviously something there, something Shepard wasn't willing to talk about concerning Miranda as she'd just shut the whole conversation down like a bullet between the eyes. "Well I'm always here if you need to talk or vent, preferably verbally." she offered with a smile.

Shepard smirked, "Thanks Kelly." she wondered just how much was going to get back to Miranda. Having been in the military for most of her adult life it didn't occur to her that changing out of her armour in front of Kelly might not be considered normal.

Kelly's eyes widened and her cheeks went red as Shepard stripped down to her underwear to change into jogging shorts and singlet. She couldn't tear her eyes away from that incredible figure, Shepard was sculpted perfection, her muscles defined and not an ounce of fat on her most likely from the reconstruction process taking so long. She was a soldier, her body hardened for battle but she was also a woman with just enough curves to be sizzling if she wanted to show off her figure. Wearing simply shorts and singlet definitely showed off her figure but not in an intentional way. The way Shepard carried herself was of a woman unconcerned about her appearance. After all she had only just finished telling her how important her scars had been to her, things that others would have considered ugly and brutish she had made a part of herself and not just aesthetically, they had been a part of her _self-identity._ She would have to change how she saw herself now and it wasn't going to be an easy journey for her especially with what she was being thrown in to less than a few hours after waking from a traumatic coma.

Shepard turned to leave the yeoman to her task when she noticed her blushing, "Is everything alright Kelly?"

Kelly blinked and realized she'd been caught out staring and her cheeks went even redder, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to stare, you're just so beautiful I... I couldn't look away." now she did, she ducked her face in embarrassment.

It was Shepard's turn to blush, it had been so long since someone had called her that, her scars had been extensive and to the majority of people horrific. "Um, thank you." she mumbled and quickly made her exit.

Kelly sighed when the doors closed, "Smooth, real smooth Kelly." she grumbled at herself and set about diligently fixing the Commanders clothes for her.


	8. Labels

Shepard was glaring at her hand as she strode into the medbay, still in her work out clothes and glistening with sweat.

Chakwas beamed at the younger woman. She had that same look every time she got an injury, that look of 'how dare it break' or 'who gave you permission to bleed out'. "I see you've been breaking in the gym Commander."

Shepard's face snapped up in surprise at the familiar voice, "Doc!" she beamed, positively radiant as she enthusiastically crossed the distance between them with a laugh of delight and hugged the woman, sweaty and all.

Chakwas didn't mind in the least as she hugged the young woman back, a woman she'd never imagined she'd see again until Cerberus contacted her. "Stephanie." She greeted softly with all the warmth of a loving mother reunited with her lost little girl.

"Goddess it's so good to see you, to have you here... here of all places?" Shepard pulled back, "What the fuck are you doing with Cerberus?" she was positively confused.

Chakwas laughed, "I'm here for _you_ Stephanie." she cupped her face, taking in the scars with her trained eye and sobering quickly, "On a critical mission to save the galaxy once again."

Shepard sighed, "Do I even get any other missions these days?"

Chakwas chuckled, "Well you _are_ the best there is _Commander_."

"Oh I'm not so sure about that. I just bring out the best in the people around me, it's always a _team_ effort." Shepard blushed at the praise.

"And _that_ is what makes you the best." Chakwas took hold of the swollen, bruising hand gently to examine it, "Now am I going to have to send a search party for some poor unconscious victim?"

Shepard chuckled, "Maybe a requisitions officer? We'll need a new punching bag. "

"Already? We haven't even left dock yet!" Chakwas scolded though unable to hide the mirth in her eyes.

"I wanted to see how hard I could hit. Miranda upgraded just about everything else." Her grin became mischievous. "Apparently I could punch a hole through the hull. If it'd been a person, they'd be pretty dead I imagine."

"That is a positively terrifying thought. Don't even _think_ about trying it." Chakwas growled at her, no mirth this time.

Shepard just grinned with sparkling eyes that said 'already done that'.

"Well just don't try it then." She grumbled, "Come on, I need to set this. How you managed to break your own bones after all the reinforcing Cerberus did to them is quite beyond me."

"What can I say, I could always hit hard, now I hit harder." she shrugged and sat down on one of the beds as ordered. It was just like the old Normandy, though much better equipped.

Chakwas got what she needed and returned to the Commanders side. It was only then, standing side on to Shepard that she noticed something and once she noticed it, it was glaringly obvious. "They removed your scars I see. How do you feel about that?" she asked softly, she knew how proud Shepard was of them, how much a part of herself they were.

Shepard scowled, "Naked, violated, like a part of my soul is missing. Don't... don't get me started please Helen. I'm still coming to terms with it, hence the hand." she murmured, eyes firmly planted on her hand as Chakwas manipulated the bones to how they were supposed to be. It hurt like a bitch but after everything she'd been through it wasn't anything to really complain about.

Chakwas now understood why she had a broken hand, she was hurting and angry. "Perhaps it could give you the opportunity for a fresh start, a new beginning. You've had a hard life Stephanie, not everyone gets the chance for a second round." she spoke gently, soothing the woman with both her words and medi-gel. "You have a fresh canvas to work from but that doesn't mean you have to forget the old one."

"So I shouldn't go hunting down a Maw to replace the old scars?" Shepard smirked, but Doc's words struck a chord in her heart and she found it... calming as she considered it.

"I would not recommend it, no." Chakwas smiled and shook her head, tenderly massaging that strong slender hand.

"I'll take that under advisement." she glanced up at the woman, still smirking. "But thank you."

Chakwas nodded with her knowing smile.

The doors swished opened and Miranda strode in with a rather annoyed expression, "What's going on here?" she demanded, nodding towards the injured hand.

"Turns out the punching bag is harder than your head, go figure." Shepard smirked, casting her a sidelong glance, "That's _after_ I broke the bag of course, perhaps you should have Doc take a look at your skull, make sure I didn't fracture anything. I mean you were out cold before you hit the ground and I'd hate to interfere with your higher mental functions and everything, though it might give us _mere mortals_ a chance to catch up." she teased her, watching her to see if it got a familiar reaction.

Miranda was too livid to catch the reference to the past, "My skull is perfectly fine, no thanks to _you_ and you could _never_ catch up with my _higher mental functions_." she hissed then stormed out before she was drawn further in to a childish argument.

Shepard sighed, "She really is frustrating. I mean that is a seriously _old_ joke between us and she _still_ has no idea who I am." she muttered.

Chakwas raised her brow, "I think she knows you're Commander Shepard." she stated the obvious.

Shepard considered her for a moment and if it wasn't for the fact they were on a Cerberus ship with an AI constantly listening in she would have told the good doctor everything, "She knows what my files say and Stephanie Shepard's files only begins at sixteen."

Chakwas heard the tone, saw the strange look in her eyes that was distant and forlorn, "I had assumed that's because your files were on Mindoir and with the attack..."

Shepard shook her head, "My childhood was erased _before_ Mindoir." was all she said on the matter, "I'm gonna have a shower." she murmured and walked out rather dejectedly.

Chakwas shook her head sadly, Stephanie had lost so much for so long, when would it end? When would she be able to finally _live _and not just exist?

Shepard and Joker had stepped outside as soon as she'd received word the emblazoning was done. Joker was ecstatic to see _Normandy_ glistening and bright on the hull. Shepard was _livid_ to see the Cerberus logo in front of it.

Shepard strode up to the painting crew, "Before you pack up your gear there's something else I need you to do." she looked to them firmly.

"Yes ma'am?" the head technician looked to her curiously.

"The Cerberus logo. Get rid of it." she stated flatly, crossing her arms and instilling the fear of Shepard into them with a single look.

They scurried like ants, too terrified of her to argue. They all knew who she was and what she'd done so _she_ scared them more than the Illusive Man.

"What's that all about?" Joker asked curiously as she returned.

"That Cerberus logo is going to cause me all kinds of grief. They're a _secretive_ organization. What self respecting _secretive_ organization emblazons their logo on _everything_ even my fucking _underwear?_" She snarled.

Joker guffawed, "Seriously? Your _panties_ have Cerberus logos on them?"

"Kelly's removing them." she growled, "Besides Cerberus has pissed off _that_ many groups, the Council, Alliance, just about every government body not to mention merc groups, having that on our hull is like painting a big fucking red target screaming 'shoot me, shoot me'. That is attention I already get enough of thank you very much." she seethed.

"You know Lawson'll be real pissed at you." Joker grinned at her, she was inviting trouble with the woman already.

"I can handle Miranda _Lawson_." she snorted.

"Yeah, you're about the only one who could." Joker chuckled and began the walk back into his new baby.

Shepard remained outside until the offending logo had been removed. Thankfully no one was the wiser at this point in time. She smiled and nodded to the workers, giving them a thumbs up for which they were infinitely relieved and grateful. Her next task was to keep Miranda sufficiently engaged so that she didn't step foot outside the ship to notice the adjustment. The last of the crew would be arriving in three hours.

Miranda didn't look up from her screen as the door chimed, "Enter." she called like a Queen allowing a subservient into her domain.

Shepard strolled in, not in armour this time but black slacks and fitted white and black shirt that was missing the logo over the left breast.

Miranda was a little surprised to see Shepard and noted she actually looked quite smart in the altered attire that was form fitting and hugged her figure quite nicely. "Commander, what can I do for you?" she asked congenially.

"I've had a chance to read over the dossiers and I'd like to discuss them with you if you have time. I also got an interesting message from Tali." Shepard waited for permission before she'd take a seat.

Miranda nodded, she hadn't had time to check over her own messages let alone Shepard's and hadn't thought that she'd be getting any just yet as only a limited number of people were aware of her existence. "What did Tali have to say?" she asked crisply.

"Apparently Veetor got more than just scans, he got a few _live samples_ of Seekers. She wants to know where to send one for us to pick up." She had assumed Miranda would be pleased with the information but her scowl suggested otherwise.

"If we'd brought him with us she wouldn't _have_ to send them anywhere." Miranda growled.

"If we'd brought him with us he'd have been so terrified he forgot all about them until we were off planet anyway and we'd have to send someone back to get them if he even remembered them at all." she countered quickly. "But that's beside the point. I'd like us to go to the Citadel first. If I can get my Spectre status reinstated it will give us access to a whole lot more resources. Not to mention if we run into any trouble with Council or Alliance assets given that Cerberus are considered terrorists I'll be able to use my position as a safeguard to get us out peacefully."

Miranda had so many problems with that she didn't know where to begin, "Do you think they'll just accept you back? That they'll turn a blind eye to you working with _terrorists_?" she growled, glaring at Shepard icily.

"Spectres do what it takes to keep the galaxy _safe_ by any means necessary even if it means working with what many deem _unsavoury_ assets. Besides, they owe me one for saving their arses and with the Collectors abducting human colonies they need _someone_ investigating which is what we'll be doing anyway." she pointed out reasonably. "To that end I'm going to need some files demonstrating that I did indeed die, the condition my body was in when you recovered it and some data on the restoration process that you feel would be appropriate to share with the Council showing how you got me from point A, being dead, to point B, being alive." she asserted, hoping it would be something that would keep her occupied for awhile.

Miranda growled in the back of her throat inaudibly but nodded, "Fine."

"Thank you. Now the dossiers. I believe Mordin Solus would be best to enlist first, especially with samples for him to play with. Massani will be in a club or chasing down bounties so we'll need to do some scouting when we get there. And from what's here on Archangel he'll be pissing off mercs so I'd go to the Blue Suns, Eclipse or Bloodpack to see what they know about him or if they've got anything going on he'd be likely to hit." She looked up from the datapad in her hands.

Miranda nodded, "Agreed. How do you intend on scouting for Massani?"

"Well I _would_ just give him a call but drat my omni-tool with all my contact data got a little fried." she smirked, "So Aria T'loak would be my first stop, hell she might know something about Archangel."

"And what makes you think she'll just _give_ you the information you're looking for?" Miranda mused, that was a rather bold move on Omega, approaching it's Queen Bee.

"I don't, but you never know if you don't ask. Besides last time we met she was trying very hard to get in my pants, or in my head, most likely both Asari flirtations are confusing." she rubbed her aching jaw which made her look almost comical to Miranda as she truly did look confused.

Miranda shook her head at the frustrating woman and snapped, "Of course she'd want to get in your _head_, you've got a lot of classified information in there as well as more knowledge than the vast majority of people have on the Protheans."

Shepard's face darkened but her cybernetics didn't flare up signifying it wasn't anger she was feeling, "So she's at least willing to talk to me. I'd like those files before we reach the Citadel and I'd like to call Anderson before we get there so he has _some_ notice before he has a heart attack at seeing me alive."

Miranda wasn't quite sure what to make of the expression on Shepard's face, the lack of glowing meant she wasn't angry or overly emotional but there was... something that bothered her. "We'll send him a message, it would be prudent to keep your presence as quiet as possible and a visual communication to the Citadel would compromise that."

_Now_ Shepard's cybernetics started to glow, "I was being polite in phrasing it as a request. You and I both know that it's more than possible to make a discrete call to the consulate. You've cut off my extra-net access, I'm not allowed to contact anyone I know, you're isolating me from my support networks and all it's going to do is get you one hell of a pissed off Commander. I'm _not_ a fucking machine. You can't just reboot me and expect me to suddenly cut off from everyone I knew and cared about. Besides this is _business_ with Anderson. Just sending him a note saying 'Hi it's Shepard, yeah big surprise I'm not dead anymore' isn't going to cut it. Now you are going to set up that call and I don't fucking care if it's in here and you're standing over my shoulder the entire time." An idea came to mind, "In fact it'd probably be better if _you_ talk to him first and tell him to sit down you've got big news." she growled at the infuriating woman.

Miranda sighed, she could see she wasn't going to win this one, "Fine."

Shepard calmed a little, her tone was softer as she nodded to Miranda, "Now you realize as soon as he sees that logo on your uniform he's going to shut down and see only the enemy right?"

Miranda scowled, "I _am_ Cerberus, you are here only because of Cerberus." she growled at her.

"I know that and I'm not saying don't tell him, I'm only suggesting you give him a chance to hear what you have to say first. Call it being diplomatic, I am capable of such a thing and I'm only asking you to be as well. But it's your call on that. Have EDI contact me when you're ready." Shepard nodded curtly and left abruptly.

Miranda was tempted to wear her uniform just to spite the Commander, but what she'd said was actually logical. Antagonizing the Councillor with her Cerberus status would not be the best way to begin this interaction.


	9. Defiled

When Shepard returned as per EDI's call she was pleasantly surprised that Miranda had chosen to take her advice in regards to wearing something that _wasn't_ emblazoned with Cerberus logos. She was slightly shocked that Miranda _owned_ something that wasn't emblazoned with Cerberus logos but thought it would be best to refrain from mentioning that little thought.

Miranda waited for a smug smile or comment but none came, instead Shepard simply nodded.

"So how will this work?" Shepard asked from the other side of her console.

"I'll speak with Anderson and explain in short that you're alive and would like to speak with him. Say anything you shouldn't and I'll hit you with a biotic warp." she growled meaning to intimidate the woman.

Shepard had the option of getting real pissed off at the threat or to gloss over it, take the Krogan perspective that the greatest insult was to _ignore_ a supposed threat. She actually grinned, "You know _that_ could be fun." she returned lightly.

Miranda groaned and shook her head but before she could respond her screen came alive and Councillor Anderson was looking at her curiously. "Councillor Anderson." her entire demeanour changed to completely professional with a touch of seductiveness that she used to put all men in power at ease without appearing to.

Shepard, however, knew it was an old trick, one _she'd_ been the recipient of many, many times.

Anderson looked her over and merely nodded, "Miss Lawson is it. I must say I'm intrigued, you mentioned in your message you had some classified information concerning a certain lost Alliance operative that I'd be interested in and your communication is more highly encrypted than even the Council uses." he got straight to business. He figured he knew what this was about, he'd received a message from Tali'Zorah only an hour ago telling him everything that had happened on Freedom's Progress. They'd also been getting reports about Shepard being with Cerberus for several months now.

Miranda smiled, "Indeed, this information pertains to Commander Shepard and as such we deemed it crucial that certain security measures took place." she responded smoothly.

He didn't look surprised at all and again merely nodded, "And what information do you have on her?"

"As you're well aware of her body was never found by the Alliance or Council and as such it was assumed she burned up in the atmosphere of Alchera. It was not." she paused to let those words sink in.

Anderson listened, not saying anything just yet, his deep brown eyes taking in what he was seeing and he carefully considered what she said and did not say.

"Her body was retrieved by operatives of the Shadow Broker to be sold to the Collectors." she continued calmly.

"What!" Anderson exclaimed in shock, _that_ was news to him, Tali hadn't mentioned that.

"Her body was recovered and since then we have been working on restoring her." she maintained her calm approach.

"And now I take it you've been successful?" He pre-empted what she was going to say.

"With great difficulty and a vast amount of resources. It took two years, three months and eighteen days but the project was successful. Commander Shepard is alive and would like to speak with you." Miranda stood and motioned for Shepard to approach.

Anderson finally smiled when Shepard herself came into view.

"Hey Anderson." she smiled, her voice soft and tender as she waited for him to respond.

"Shepard." he greeted her, his voice soft with affection for the woman who was like the daughter he'd never had, he smiled to her as he _hoped_ it really was her. Tali had been convinced but she'd always had a bad case of hero worship when it came to Shepard. "You do realize this is a call I'd never thought I'd get."

"I know, believe me, I _know_. But I really was dead, Miranda and her team really did resurrect me and no I'm no clone. Certainly upgraded and not quite finished," she gestured to her face, "but alive and conscious as of yesterday and believe me, yesterday was a _hell_ of a day." she groused.

"Talk to me Shepard, what's happened?" Anderson asked her back in his business mode a little more.

"Miranda has some files that show different aspects of the reconstruction process to prove that I am Commander Shepard and show a little of what they did to restore me." she assured him.

He leaned forward, "If you're _really_ Shepard then you'll be able to tell me your real name." he challenged.

Shepard smirked and glanced at Miranda for him pointedly, "I won't say it in present company, she's gotta figure it out herself. But I will say that my name was changed after a certain powerful man decided he didn't want me interfering with his little girl, loving me was _not_ a part of his master plan for her life and I wasn't letting go like he'd planned. So he sent an assassin after me, turned out to be a young man we both knew and thought was a friend but apparently he was on _daddy's_ payroll. I'm sure he was quite eager for the assignment as with me out of the way the daughter would be _available_ again and needing comfort for her broken heart. Only instead of me he killed my father, he had no idea I was a biotic." she hoped it was enough.

Anderson nodded he mentally recalled the reports detailing different resources Cerberus had been pulling the last two years. Resources in cybernetics, tissue regeneration and other sensitive technologies that indicated they were up to something along the lines of building a biological weapon of some kind. And indeed they were, for Shepard was the greatest biological weapon humanity had. "I believe you. It was Cerberus wasn't it."

Shepard gravely nodded.

"Miss Lawson is a Cerberus Operative?" he was going to be filing that name away for a deep investigation.

"Lazarus Project Director. Meet Lazarus." she tapped her chest, her tone rueful.

Anderson was absolutely fuming as what Tali had told him was confirmed, "You said you'd been upgraded."

"No control chip." she asserted quickly, "Much to Miss Lawson's dismay of course." she quirked her lips slightly feeling the woman roll her eyes behind her but her slight smile was hardly amused. "But Cerberus did invest over four billion credits into me for a reason. One I can't deny or refuse to act upon because of their... dealings, one we need to talk about in person."

Anderson took a deep breath, "Look Shepard, I _know_ you, what's this about? What could Cerberus possibly have on you?"

Shepard gave him a long, hard look, "_Miranda_ will slap my arse with a warp if I say too much right now but what is the biggest thing I would ruin my reputation for?"

Anderson and Miranda both picked up on the way Shepard had said her name. Miranda frowned, wondering at Shepard meant by it. Anderson's eyes widened slightly at _both_ things Shepard had said without saying.

"Is she... who I think she is?" Anderson asked slowly, aware that the woman was still in the room with Shepard even if he couldn't see her.

"Yes." Shepard answered simply.

"And she doesn't know your real name?"

Shepard just looked at him with a withering glare that made it very clear that he should drop the subject _right now._

Anderson looked at her sympathetically. He and Hackett were the ones responsible for erasing her past, they knew just about all there was to know about that time. "Do you trust her?" he asked softly.

Shepard took a deep breath, "Trust is earned. Threatening to kill me is not an endearing quality in that regard." It wasn't an outright no, but simply a not yet.

"Don't let the past hold you, time changes everything." Anderson advised her.

"Indeed. I go from Saviour to Deranged in less than a year of being gone." Her expression was now cold and closed as she changed the subject blatantly.

Anderson grimaced, "Shepard..."

"Save it." she waved her hand at him, "I realize the Council really don't give a shit that the Reapers are coming to wipe out all sentient life. But there _is_ a credible threat out there abducting human colonies. I just led a team to Freedom's Progress."

Anderson nodded, "I got a message from Tali." he informed her.

Miranda hissed, "Damnit Shepard!" she should have anticipated that.

Shepard looked up at her with brilliant red eyes, "Want to put a bullet in me already Lawson, go ahead. I figured it'd be better coming from Tali than from Cerberus rumour mills."

"We'll discuss this later." Miranda growled, her tone laced with a menacing warning.

Anderson was both pleased and concerned at the hostility between the two women. It meant Shepard really _wasn't_ Cerberus but she was walking a razors edge with the woman she'd loved as a teenager.

"Did Tali tell you about what Veetor found?" Shepard returned her attention to Anderson.

He nodded, "Collectors you think might be working for Reapers."

"Indeed. I want to present this evidence to the Council, I also want to be reinstated as a Spectre so I can investigate it _without_ interference from the Council or the Alliance. And between you and me find the evidence connecting these abductions to the Reapers and therefore that the Reapers are real." She put in hoping that Anderson had not completely lost faith in her.

"Shepard, you know I'll do everything in my power to help you. How soon can you get here?" He nodded resolutely. Shepard was secretly brilliant and he knew not to doubt her, he also knew that she wouldn't be doing anything willingly with Cerberus if there wasn't another way.

Shepard smiled, "See if you can schedule an appointment in for tomorrow morning. And no I don't want word of my return getting out. We'll be coming in low key and hoping to stay that way for as long as possible, hence how super encrypted this communication is."

"Understood and probably for the best." Anderson acknowledged with a nod. "I'll send a message through this com line when I've confirmed a meeting time."

"I'm looking forward to seeing you in person sir, and congratulations on becoming Councillor." she winked.

He grunted, "Thanks. It's peachy. I blame you by the way."

Shepard chuckled, "See you tomorrow sir." she saluted out of habit.

"Tomorrow." he agreed and returned the salute ruefully before ending the communication.

Shepard stood and turned to Miranda, bracing herself for a fight and she wasn't let down as Miranda did indeed hit her with a warp. She countered it quickly enough and it wasn't particularly strong, just enough to cause a significant amount of pain. When Miranda released her she merely looked at her, her expression cold, "For someone who knows _everything there is to know_ about me, do you truly have no idea what motivates me? I can only assume you lash out like you do as an outlet to your anger and frustration at not being able to control me as you assumed you could because you can control and manipulate everyone else through your looks, intelligence and position."

Miranda hissed through her teeth and took a step toward her.

Shepard met her head on, "Go on and prove it."

Miranda clenched her fists and backed down as she in no way wanted to prove Shepard right.

"Lawson if you truly want to turn this into a pissing match, I'll win every time because _I_ am in command of this mission. _You_ are my XO and if you can't handle taking orders from me take it up with your Illusive Man." Shepard growled, her voice was still husky and it was annoying the hell out of her as it made her sound far more sultry than she was intending.

Miranda glared at her, "You may be in _command_ of the _mission_. But this is a Cerberus vessel, a Cerberus crew and you would do well to remember that." she snapped in return.

It was totally the _wrong_ thing to say as until now Shepard had been calm but now her body clenched and her cybernetics raged, "Oh I remember that every fucking second Miss _Lawson_. You have your bloody _stamp_ on _every fucking thing_. Tell me, is there anything _left_ in that head of yours _other_ than Cerberus jargon? Is that logo all that you are?" she snarled, grabbing the collar of her catsuit where the logo was normally situated, careful not to touch her skin or move her from her position.

Miranda waited to be shoved and was slightly surprised when she wasn't, "I believe in the _goals_ of Cerberus, ensuring humanities future..."

Shepard cut her off in frustration, "Everything Cerberus does puts humanities in further jeopardy. Don't you fucking understand that? We are one race of _many_. We are a _part_ of a galactic community now. That _doesn't _mean we let the Council races walk all over it but it _does_ mean we need to try and play nice with the other kids or we'll turn into outcasts like the fucking _Batarians_. Why the _FUCK_ do you think I became a Spectre?" she shouted at the woman, releasing her and storming over to the window that showed the stars streaking past them, oblivious to what was going on in the insignificant little ship.

"Enlighten me." Miranda growled, letting Shepard do the talking as perhaps it would help her understand the woman more so she could get a better read on her and be able to manipulate her more.

"These races have been living together for thousands of years, they've entered a balance that's more like a rut, a golden age of unity that has long since passed yet they don't realize it. Then _we_ come along. Brash, impetuous, stubborn, violent, _that_ is what they see. We stood up to the Turians in the First Contact War like no other race has. We showed them we have teeth and could have put a serious dent in their 'peaceful and stable universe' which is why the Council stepped in. But until I came along they treated humans like a caged wild animal just waiting to lash out at them. I joined the Spectres to prove that we are far more than their impressions of us." Shepard declared passionately.

Miranda listened, picking apart everything that Shepard was saying and analysing it quickly.

"To show them that we are honourable, have courage, are intelligent and are _capable_ of being an active and beneficial part of the galactic community. That we can not only work together but that our intelligence and innovations can bring about a new era of change that can benefit us _all_." She turned back to Miranda, "Yet for every step I took, every decision I made to put humanity on that path I had to fight against the backdraw of _Cerberus_. For every step forward I earned humanity we've been dragged back _three_ by the actions of _your _precious _Cerberus_." she stalked back to Miranda, "So _yes_ I fucking remember this is a Cerberus ship, _yes_ I fucking remember it's a Cerberus crew and your _goals_ of ensuring humanities future are so fucked up you with all your intelligence and genetically enhanced brain cells can't even see just how badly you're _screwing our future_."

Miranda was not about to let that slide, no way in hell, "Everything Cerberus does is for the betterment of our race. You think you're the only one who can shape our place in the galaxy? What bloody _arrogance_. Since you died the Council has _slandered_ your name, everything you tried to do. Your precious path to a new golden age has crumbled yet it was _us_ who brought you back."

Shepard flared, "_I never said I was the only one!_" she yelled, "Bloody hell Lawson, I'm not a fucking saint or some egotistical superstar but I was put in a position where _everyone_ was watching every little thing I did. They were looking to _me_ to see what humans are really made of. They've slandered me because like Hitler the lies are easier to believe than the truth _especially_ with the likes of Cerberus to compare me to."

"They had a Reaper rip off their front doors and they still didn't believe it." Miranda scoffed.

"Because organizations like _Cerberus_ took all the evidence before they could examine it. EDI's told me Reaper tech's been used in the makeup of her hardware. How _can_ the Council believe evidence they're _denied_?" Shepard shot back immediately.

"You told them everything they needed to know and they still denied it because you're human." Miranda seethed, her voice stone cold, this was so not going to plan.

"I fucking _know_ that Lawson. Why do you think I worked my goddamn arse off _proving_ myself to them? Yet nothing I did could work past the damage you people did with your Thresher Maw experiments, the Rachni, the Thorian Creepers, the Husks, Kahoku and whatever other _fucked up things_ you do. They looked at me and saw not what _I _could do but the potential for me to fall into what _you_ do and now look were we fucking are." She shook her head in disgust. "Cerberus is a disgrace, _nothing_ you've done is for the _advancement_ of _humanity_, only the advancement of power for a single man. Tell me, is there _anything_ Cerberus has done that has not been of a militant or _manipulative_ nature?" she threw the ball in Miranda's court now and waited for a response.

"Cerberus has made _many_ medical advances, hell we brought you back to _life_ Shepard." Miranda snapped her wrist towards her.

"A _militant_ project. All of your _advances_ were to bring me back for the singular purpose of _fighting_ an enemy no one else will." Shepard instantly dismissed it, "Try again."

Miranda mentally swore, "We were the ones to advance biotics in humans and make amps safer and more powerful..."

"_Again_ a fucking _militant_ project. Human's aren't _naturally_ biotic, you _know _that. Hell all those eezo explosions over populations centres were probably _caused_ by Cerberus. There were definitely too many people _ready_ to snap up the kids who actually _survived_." Shepard snapped angrily.

"That's a _hell_ of an accusation." Miranda flared now, outraged by it.

Shepard, already glowing with both her biotics and cybernetics scoffed, "But plausible given your track record and the lengths you go to, to _advance humanity_."

"The Husks and Creepers were _mindless_ and when we discovered the Rachni were sentient we _abandoned_ the project. They were to be expendable shock troops, how many would have survived Eden Prime if we'd had even a dozen Rachni troopers?" Miranda defended heatedly. Shepard's biotics pulsed wildly and Miranda wavered, if Shepard lost control they were both dead.

"_HOW THE FUCK DO YOU THINK THEY'RE MADE?_" Shepard's voice resonated, her biotics shifting like waves around her with every syllable. "Did you think the Thorian just spat the creepers out its arse? That the husks were simply produced on an assembly line in a factory? They were living, breathing, sentient _HUMAN BEINGS!_ Until your precious scientists shoved those innocent colonists on Dragon's Teeth, _purposefully_. ExoGeni, working with _your people_, deliberately placed a colony over the fucking Thorian just _watching_ as it turned _humans_ into fucking Creepers. Your _mindless shock troops_ were once _people_, people _Cerberus_ turned into monsters, you _ripped away_ their humanity, you _defiled_ and _dishonoured _them." The rage that was pouring from Shepard was threatening to overwhelm her and she deliberately stepped back from Miranda, shoving her hands under her armpits and clenching down on her body.

Miranda had never been truly afraid in her life, until now, her heart was racing in fear as she knew her biotic shields wouldn't hold against Shepard. But Shepard's words were sinking in. She couldn't be right, it couldn't... Cerberus _couldn't_ have purposefully...

Shepard was nowhere near calm but she was no longer murderous as she looked to Miranda, she could _taste_ her fear through her biotics and the thought of Miri being so terrified of her broke her heart. Her biotic storm drained away and her shoulders slumped, when she spoke again her voice was soft and filled with agonizing pain, "How can _you_ defend that? How can _you_ so wholeheartedly promote that Cerberus has humanities best interests at heart, when so many of your projects torture humans, massacre good marines, or turn humans into monsters and call them _mindless shock troops_?"

Miranda didn't get the chance to even formulate a response as Shepard left, her entire demeanour not that of victory at having bested Miranda in an argument but rather crushing defeat. How could she respond to that? Firstly it was clear she had a lot of research to do about her own organization. The only way she could respond was through facts, facts she could work with.

Chakwas had to treat Shepard for two broken hands a few hours later.


	10. Common Sense?

_**Loving the reviews! In fact I'd planned on giving it a couple days before updating but just for being encouraged I'll give you a couple more. I hope you'll find it interesting finding out just what has happened to Miri because it's not as straight forward as you may suspect, it's not like 'Seph' has just been flatly erased from Miri's mind. If you recall in Chapter 1 Miri likens Shepard's eyes to those of a Persephone Calleyuss... **__**though it's going to take some time for the full extent of what's been done to BOTH Miri and Shepard to truly come out... there's a reason Sephs a biotic goddess, I hope you'll stick with me for it!**_

_**Last chapter was almost cathartic to write while it got me incredibly frustrated as well with Shepard taking Miranda to task about Cerberus and Miranda just not having anything substantial to throw back at her. Everything so far has been in Shepard's favour because Miranda is kept so in the dark by the Illusive Man, for reasons that will be revealed in later chapters, which feels completely unfair to Miri right now. As you pointed out Gemini1179 it really frustrated me in the game that you couldn't say anything about what I think are the most logical conclusions into just how Cerberus gets their 'shock troops' instead you get the 'poor me' from Miri and 'I like your perfect arse' from Shep. (Though gotta admit when playing mShep the whole pissing her off and shocking her with a kiss was pretty fun)  
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_**I realize there's been a whole lot of angst so far and Shepard really is starting to reach her limits with Miranda but there's still a little more to come before they come to any kind of neutral ground. I mean you gotta remember Seph's only been up and walking about for a couple days, her sense of self has been totally smashed by her teenage love and Miri doesn't do second in command well at all.  
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_**Enjoy! :)**_

_**(Sorry for the re-post of this chapter, simply got Shep's eyes wrong colour she's got amber eyes)  
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><p>"Seriously?" Shepard crossed her arms and looked to Miranda with a mixture of disbelief and irritation.<p>

"What?" Miranda frowned back at her.

"We're going to the Presidium and you're wearing _that_?" Shepard gestured to the skin tight white catsuit with black sleeves and the bright orange Cerberus logo over her breast.

"And you're wearing armour, what happened to not standing out?" Miranda countered.

"I'm going to convince the Council that I'm ready for duty and _should_ be reinstated. That says 'I'm Cerberus arrest me'. Hell they'd probably be happier with 'shoot me' first." she didn't add that right now she'd almost be happy to oblige, "You're part of a clandestine organization. Why the fuck are you broadcasting it to everyone?" Shepard demanded heatedly. They hadn't spoken since their heated argument yesterday and both of them were still smarting from it not to mention the tension on the ship was palpable. The crew wouldn't look either woman in the eye, got out of their way quickly and cautiously glanced at them as they passed as Joker didn't _have_ to broadcast their fight for just about everyone on the third level to have heard it, to have heard Shepard's take on Cerberus and some of their more nauseating projects.

Joker and Jacob exchanged amused looks as the pair of women were arguing just outside the airlock about clothes of all things.

"They already know I'm a Cerberus Operative your point is invalid." Miranda shook her head, "You have a meeting to attend and this is wasting time." she snapped, moving to brush passed her.

Shepard put her hand out and stopped Miranda firmly in her tracks, "Yes _I_ have a meeting. Your attendance was never mentioned neither was amnesty for resurrecting me. Until my status as Spectre is restored and it's acknowledged that I'm using Cerberus resources _you_ are still a target and as you just pointed out they _know_ your identity." inside she grinned at the scowl that produced on Miranda's usually cool face but her fierce determination didn't waver a micron, "And frankly given your position within Cerberus and your super human intelligence you're a high priority target many would simply love to either get their hands on or take you out and _not _the date variety."

Miranda's scowl deepened and her eyes blazed at her while Joker sniggered behind his hand.

"Now either go get changed or I'll rip that logo off myself right here and now and you _won't_ like what that does to your precious suit." she growled fiercely her glowing red eyes boring into Miranda's with indomitable authority and will.

Miranda went to snap at her in response but Shepard saw the spark and knew she wasn't backing down.

"Oh you want me to go ahead and try do you. Remember how well that turned out for you last time? You were out cold and on your arse in heartbeat. We can try that little dance again or I could hold your arse in a stasis field while I rip it off or you change your clothes or even simply _remain_ on the ship. Your call _Miss Lawson_." She informed Miranda of her options in no uncertain terms.

Miranda took a deep breath and exhaled slowly to keep herself cool and composed telling herself to pick her battles and that this was not one of them. Most likely Shepard was still angry at her for yesterday and this was just a reaction, "I'll get changed and meet you at Councillor Anderson's chambers, _Commander_." she hissed through her teeth then spun on her heels and stalked off.

"I'd say that's three nil." Joker chuckled, "You better watch out Commander, she's gonna get you back when you _least_ expect it."

Shepard growled, "For someone so brilliant how can she be so fucking _dense_." she shook her head, glaring at the retreating woman who was getting into the lift.

"She know about paintjob yet?" Joker smirked at her, thoroughly amused and hoping that he'd get to see the two of them come to blows. I mean who wouldn't want to get a piece of that action? Two of the hottest women known to man kicking and screaming and pulling hair... Then he remembered yesterday and thought better of it. Those two could rip a hole in the hull with a stray thought and he didn't think there'd be anyone who could intervene before it came to that... well maybe Chakwas could calm the Commander but there'd be little she could do if it came to blows.

"Oh she'll find out shortly no doubt." Shepard drawled wryly.

"Yeah and she'll get it repainted just to spite you." Joker pointed out, grinning from ear to ear.

"To which I'll have the entire hull painted black. It'd make us even less visible out in space adding to our stealth profile. Maybe we should do that anyway." Shepard smirked, calming down as she thought about it. "Well I've a date with an advertising station." she sighed, anything for a distraction right now.

After Miranda had reported to the Illusive Man that they were going to the Citadel first he'd forwarded another dossier for one Kasumi Goto, a master thief apparently. She was going to meet them via an advertising terminal at the customs area of Zakera Ward where they'd docked. It was far less profile than anywhere near the presidium and allowed them to more or less sneak in.

Jacob walked a step behind Shepard, also in armour although unlike Miranda he had chosen to clean off the Cerberus markings from his gear, albeit simply for the comfort of the Commander. Just about _everyone_ had heard the argument between them yesterday or at least that they were yelling at each other. He'd noticed straightaway that she'd approved and was already far more relaxed around him than she was with Miranda, he'd also noticed that quite a few of the crew had altered their uniforms. It was certainly a sight seeing, well _hearing,_ someone finally go toe to toe with the fearsome presence that was Miranda Lawson the Queen of Ice Bitches. Either Shepard had the quad of a Krogan or she didn't realize just who she was messing with.

Shepard looked around the fairly quiet dock and sighed at the numerous advertising terminals to choose from. "Guess we're going for a longer walk than anticipated Mr. Taylor."

"Please call me Jacob, Mr. Taylor was my father not me." He grimaced at hearing the name.

"Alright Jacob. I take it he's no longer with us?" she asked conversationally as they wandered up to one terminal and the regular advertisement came up.

"Nah, he was part of a consortium who settled habitable planets pretty much by squatting on them and staking a claim. His ship went MIA ten years ago and was written off as lost with all hands dead." he shrugged, it was no big deal to him anymore. He'd dealt with his past long ago.

"Or they found a really nice world they don't want to share with anyone." Shepard suggested cheekily, sensing he was okay with the past.

He chuckled, "Yeah maybe." he glanced at Shepard, knowing that her father had been murdered because an assassin had been after _her_ had to have been hard, especially so young. They approached another terminal and Jacob watched as Shepard went on alert instantly.

"Shepard! Having trouble with debt Collectors? Try Kasumi's credit services!" A perky hooded young woman appeared on the holographic display.

Shepard smirked and moved to continue walking to see what she'd do.

The voice became more sultry as a second 'advertisement' came up, "We've got the perfect companion waiting for you Shepard, perhaps something petite, smart and Japanese is your style?"

Shepard chuckled and stopped to check something on her omni-tool, pretending she hadn't yet. The annoyance from the altercation with Miranda seeping away at the joviality of Miss Goto's attempts at getting her attention.

"Commander Shepard just enter the password for a fabulous prize!" a cheerful, albeit starting to sound a little frustrated Kasumi exclaimed.

Jacob glanced from the terminal to Shepard who was trying to stifle her laughter.

"You _do_ have the password don't you Shep?" she sounded worried now. "Oh come off it how many times can you walk past the terminal and not hear me?" Kasumi groused.

At that Shepard burst out laughing, confirming that it was a live feed, "Alright I'm entertained. Silence is golden."

Kasumi chuckled, "Pleasure to finally meet you Commander Shepard. Kasumi Goto at your service, the best thief in the business." she bowed.

"So what's with the show?" Shepard asked, looking around to see if she could spot the woman but no one was standing out.

"Had to make sure it was legit. I mean last _I_ heard Commander Shepard was, you know, kinda dead. Very sad. But here you are, I must say I'm very excited to be working with you Shep." Kasumi was practically bouncing on the terminal display.

Shepard chuckled, "Likewise Miss Goto, I can't say I've had the pleasure of working with a master thief before. Have your things loaded on the Normandy and when I get back from my meeting we'll chat."

"Already done that Shep. Hope you don't mind but I kinda claimed the starboard side lounge. Oh and very nice show down with that Miranda Lawson by the way. You were _hot_!" Kasumi boasted cheekily.

Shepard just shook her head in surprise at that revelation, "Well I see there's no point keeping anything _valuable_ on the Normandy then."

Kasumi chuckled, "Oh don't worry, I wouldn't steal from you, you're my partner after all."

"Well then I'll see you..." she stopped as Kasumi de-cloaked right in front of her, the stealth field flashing as it disabled.

Kasumi grinned up at her, "Sooner than you think."

"Show off." Shepard smirked and motioned for her to follow. Kasumi was going to be an interesting travelling companion, hell she _already_ found her presence calming after Miranda.

Kasumi shrugged, she'd made a suitably impressive entrance and could see that Shepard was pleased and more relaxed than when she'd exited the ship though she was still pretty damn tense.

"I take it you're ready to start working. I'd like you putting that cloak to use and keeping an eye out for trouble." Shepard nodded to her.

"Can do Shep." Kasumi saluted cheekily and shortly vanished from sight again.

Now that Shepard knew she was using stealth technology she could make out the faint flicker of the field as Kasumi strolled away. Heading to the security checkpoint they were joined by Miranda who had changed into a purposefully eye catching black skirt, pale blue shirt and heels.

"Satisfied _Commander?_" Miranda growled to her rather smugly as they fell in step.

"In many, many ways Miss Lawson." Shepard smirked and her eyes sparkled at the flicker of surprise in Miranda's eyes. "Now were you aware that our resident thief has already taken up quarters in the Normandy?" she asked softly.

Miranda looked to her warily, "I know you were meeting her before going to Anderson."

"But not that her things are already in the starboard lounge she's decided to claim as hers?" Shepard wasn't sure whether to laugh or yell at her lax security.

Miranda glared at her, "This isn't another of your ideas of asserting your superiority over me is it?" she growled.

Shepard stiffened, "Bloody hell Lawson, that's never been my _intention_. I thought I was clear yesterday, _you_ want to fight and I will, _you_ challenge my authority and I'll stand my ground but that's _not_ how I..." she clearly needed to try another route and snapped her mouth shut for a moment as she considered an alternate approach.

Miranda glared at her with an 'oh really' look.

"Let me try this another way. You were put under my authority by your boss yet have challenged my authority on numerous occasions. Veetor was clearly needing psychological help _your people _wouldn't have provided him, you wouldn't give me _five_ minutes alone with Tali on Freedom's Progress, you reacted when I used assets that weren't from your organization and lashed out at me both verbally and biotically. I _tried_ to get you to see things from _my_ perspective and open your eyes to understand more of what your organization truly does as I'm sure everything you've read about different projects has been filtered by your boss to keep you loyal and believing the company line. And surely you can see the logic in not parading certain insignia, which promotes a purely human agenda, in the heart of galactic politics." she shook her head at the pride and stubbornness of the woman beside her, "I understand it must be frustrating for you," she took a step forward, her eyes were beginning to glow, "I mean hell I'm just a genetic _mutt_ compared to the perfection that is you." she growled sarcastically.

Miranda stiffened but stood her ground, she was hardly about to say there was nothing 'mutt-like' about Shepard's genes right now, which were damn good _before_ the rebuild.

"But this mission is the reason you brought me back and I've been given the authority to run things _my_ way by your boss." she was being careful not to mention Cerberus or the Illusive Man as there was no telling what was being recorded here. Stepping back she kept her reddened amber gaze piercing through those cobalt blues, "Miss Lawson this _may_ come as a surprise but I _don't_ wake up in the morning thinking of how many ways I can assert my authority over you or piss you off. Frankly this," she gestured between them, "is getting old _real_ fast. I've been conscious for a little over three days and if I haven't been fighting for my life I've been fighting with _you_."

Miranda was struggling to keep her cool but what aggravated her further was that Shepard actually made some valid points. She _had_ been overreacting to being demoted then again Shepard knocking her out on Freedom's Progress had seriously crossed a line to which she was still furious about.

"It's going to take time and effort for us to understand each other enough to work together effectively. You're the best, Miranda, and I'll value your input but I'm not one of your agents and this mission will work best not waving the flag of who you work for in everyone's faces, especially mine. Most organizations in known space have _issues_ with who you work for and will immediately begin any interaction with us just like the Quarians did. I want to avoid that." she took a deep breath and lowered her face a little as well as her voice, "I don't want to fight with you Miss Lawson, we've both got better things to be doing and how can I trust someone at my back who I can't even trust to get in a conversation with that doesn't divulge into an argument?" she implored softly.

Miranda glared at her, "The guilt card? Really Shepard?" she snapped swiftly.

Shepard straightened and her expression closed, "My apologies Miss Lawson, it wasn't guilt I was trying to make you feel I was appealing to your common sense. Though if it's guilt you feel perhaps you should examine _why_ you feel it." With that Shepard turned and strode towards the security check point, aware of the few spectators who'd picked up on the verbally soft but visually clear altercation between the two women.

Miranda started at having that not only come to such an abrupt end but having it so clearly turn on her. How was Shepard able to do that so easily? What was it about Shepard that was messing with her mind so much, making her usually cool and stoic mask melt into emotional pettiness? She was perfectly fine taking orders from the Illusive Man and he'd ordered her to be Shepard's XO which meant being under Shepard's command. But there was just _something_ about Shepard that she _couldn't_ identify and it was causing her no end of frustration.

They didn't get far as when the scanner caught sight of Shepard it immediately didn't like her, the alarm went off and the doors slammed shut in front and behind them.

"I swear to god I didn't touch anything!" Kasumi's voice piped up innocently.

The scanner zoned in on Shepard who looked over to the Turian C-sec officer curiously, "What seems to be the problem sir?" she asked crisply.

"Uh..." his predatory eyes widened as the console before him identified the woman as Commander Shepard, _the_ Commander Shepard whose status was dead but there she was standing right before his eyes. "I'm sorry Commander, the scanner seems to think you're ah, dead." he was flustered with embarrassment.

Shepard smiled though it didn't reach her eyes, "Yeah, I've been getting that a lot. Try finding _mostly_ _dead_ on the government documents."

The Turian chuckled, "You'll need to see Captain Bailey to get it sorted out." he nodded to her, "An honour to meet you Commander Shepard and sorry for the delay." he unlocked the doors and waved her through.

"No harm done, but I'd appreciate it if you kept this to yourself. It's not common knowledge I'm back and I'd like to keep it that way for security concerns." she appealed to his Turian sense of duty.

He nodded, "Of course Commander, Captain Bailey is just to the right."

With that she went through the doors to find this Captain Bailey. He turned out to be an older human male with balding gray hair but the physique of a hard working man, average height but muscular from decades working in an active law enforcement career.

"You'll have to make him scream a little, he's not gonna tell you everything just cos you asked nicely." Bailey was growling at one of his officers.

"Yes sir." A reluctant woman nodded and went off to carry out some kind of interrogation.

Shepard decided not to ask, "Captain Bailey?"

Bailey took one look at her and nodded, "Well I can see what the problem is right now. See security seems to think your dead Commander."

"And how do you know I'm not a clone or something?" Shepard smirked, crossing her arms and liking his no nonsense attitude.

"Hell these scanners can detect unregistered DNA mods from skin _flakes_. They'd know if you weren't the real deal." he smirked, "Ordinarily you'd have to jump through a damn lot of hoops, spend hours in lines at the embassy and financial offices to get your status reinstated as _alive_. Faking your death is an excellent form of tax evasion." amusement coloured his tone at the look on her face.

Shepard did _not_ look amused.

"But I can see you're a busy woman, so how about I just press this button right here and get you squared away?" he winked.

"That sounds great to me." Shepard relaxed and nodded in approval.

"I suggest you head on up to the presidium, let the Council know one of its Spectres aint as dead as they thought." Bailey grinned up at her, this was a day to mark on his calendar that was for sure.

"That was the plan. As I asked your officer in the scanner, I'd like this kept quiet. It's better for everyone involved if I get as little attention as possible." she looked to him pointedly.

"Understood Commander." he nodded, there was no way he was going to question or piss off the first human Spectre, she knew how to kill him in far too many disturbing ways, "Pleasure not meeting you ma'am." he grinned.

"Likewise Bailey." she grinned and continued on her way up to Anderson's office.

"So as I was attempting to say before we got a little side tracked," Shepard picked up her conversation with Miranda as though she hadn't shut it down as hard as she had, "I don't know if I should be extremely impressed or absolutely terrified that Kasumi snuck onto the Normandy with you two on security _and_ an AI on board."

"Terrified. Be terrified." Kasumi's voice whispered in her ear over her comm with a chuckle.

Miranda sighed, still reeling but Shepard was either trying to put it behind her or test her, "Well she _is_ supposed to be the best, she wouldn't have made the list if she wasn't." that was definitely highly concerning, she'd be reviewing their security that was for sure.

"I'd like to take precautions to ensure it doesn't happen again, Kasumi might be on our side but if she can sneak on board someone else could and they might not have good intentions." Shepard murmured to her seriously.

Miranda agreed wholeheartedly, "I'll review our security procedures."

Shepard nodded, relieved she wasn't going to get a fight over this one.

When Shepard said nothing more Miranda was relieved. If it was a test hopefully she'd passed it.


	11. Words of the Wise

Anderson's Council chambers were in the human embassy and were quite the step up from Udina's office but reflected that Anderson was a career military man. The decorations were enough to look important but were not overly lavish or garish or over the top in any way. Most dignitaries would consider them somewhat sparse. A few plants, some images of human military vessels and artefacts, some human sculptures also revolving around military vessels with a large one dedicated to the Normandy in pride of place in the centre of the room.

Shepard felt a pang in her heart at the sight of it. Thankfully Miranda and Jacob hadn't fought her decision to leave them outside. She found the Council were waiting for her.

Anderson shook her hand, beaming at her, "It's good to see you Shepard." he greeted her warmly.

Shepard took that as a good sign, "Likewise Councillor. I apologize for being late, there was an issue with security."

"Yes, we have just been informed. At least we know for certain that you are no clone." The Turian Councillor Velarn glared at her. His personal nightmare was back. He'd never wanted her in the Spectres but she'd impressed the hell out of them with what she'd been able to accomplish, and she _had_ saved their lives.

"It is unfortunate that you are working with Cerberus, Commander Shepard. It is akin to treason to be working with such an organization." The Asari Councillor Tevos looked at the woman warily.

"Now look here, Shepard has not..." Anderson began to defend her.

Shepard put her hand on his shoulder to silence him, "I would appreciate the opportunity to speak in my defence and present what I came here to present. If you would allow it Councillors." she took the conciliatory approach, wanting to smooth feathers not ruffle them at the moment.

"By all means Shepard, we are eager to hear of the events bringing forth your return." The Salarian Councillor Jabis nodded to her congenially.

"In regards to my _return_. I have some data files that show the state I was in when Cerberus recovered my body. They are... graphic and I apologize but you need to see them." She activated her omni-tool and sent them the files.

Tevos's eyes widened and she actually paled, which was quite impressive for an Asari.

Miranda had collated a series of images showing Shepard's progression from charred meat to the end of the project so they could see for themselves that the charred body wasn't just some random persons body.

Shepard gave them a moment to look then continued, "Being resurrected by Cerberus was by no means anything _I_ had a choice in. But they invested _billions_ of credits and over two years of work by their top operatives into me and as you are now aware, I am no clone."

"Why would Cerberus invest such a vast amount of resources into _one_ person?" Velarn demanded with a sneer.

At that Shepard forced a smile, "I guess I have _you_ to thank for that Councillor."

That caught them all a little by surprise, the Turian actually scoffed at her.

"You see your adamant refusal to accept the existence of the Reapers and prepare for their arrival has meant the Illusive Man is taking drastic measures to ensure the survival of the human race." At that Velarn interjected.

"Ah yes, the 'Reapers'." he air quoted the term arrogantly, "Your mind is still as fragile and led astray as before. We have dismissed your Reaper theory." he sneered at her.

Shepard growled in the back of her throat, her cybernetics glowing softly at the moment but she could see it still took them off guard a little. She took a half step forward as her demeanour instantly shifted from cordial to aggressive and intimidating. The words she began to speak in her low, menacing tone of voice were unable to be translated to the linguistic VI's and struck a nervous chord in the Councillors. When she was finished she stepped back and returned to a somewhat calmer demeanour.

"How _dare_ you threaten this Council!" Velarn snarled at her, predatory eyes blazing and pointing at her viciously.

Shepard looked at him unfazed, "Did I? Tell me Councillor, _what_ did I say?" she asked coolly.

"I don't need to know _what_ you said, you made the meaning perfectly clear." he snapped, turning to look at Tevos beside him.

"Is that so. How can you _know_ that when you have no idea what the words meant?" she spoke quickly before he could address the others further.

Tevos held her hand out subtly towards the Velarn to silence him, "You purposefully portrayed a physically intimidating posture and tone of voice that was at odds with the words you spoke?"

Shepard nodded once but said nothing in response just yet.

"What language were you speaking and what did you say?" Jabis asked, this was a curious and unforeseen turn of events, what was Shepard doing?

"I was speaking Prothean." she glanced at him, "I find it quite astonishing that you revere the Protheans, that you can believe they created the Relays, this Citadel and were technological marvels of their time. Yet when it comes to their communication you are in utter darkness and ignorance of both their languages and _how_ they communicated across their empire." She leaned forward slightly, "Don't you think that if this Citadel was a Prothean construction it would have the Prothean language already programmed in its systems?" she posed in a tone of voice that was meant to provoke curiosity. "That you should _know_ what I said without having to ask me for an interpretation?"

Anderson waited, he knew Shepard was highly intelligent but he couldn't tell what she was doing with this. What point was she trying to make and how did it link with the Reapers?

"There is a great deal we do not understand about this Citadel as the Keepers maintain it as they always have. The language of the Protheans may very well be embedded somewhere in its vast systems." Councillor Jabis pointed out.

"The Asari and Salarians have had over two thousand six hundred years to study and learn so much more than simply the language of the Protheans. Yet have you?" Shepard shook her head, "No. The _Keepers_ kick up a fuss when you investigate too much so you stopped trying. They're designed to shut down the Citadel if a species gets too close to learning how it operates so you've never risked it. You see this place as too valuable, as the centre of galactic power and a symbol of unification." She was becoming more and more passionate as she spoke both in her tone and the gestures of her hands.

"You see that when left alone the Keepers fulfil their role in maintaining the systems of the Citadel and interpret that as a selfless act in upholding the tasks given to them by the long gone Protheans. But that is what you _see_." she gestured to Velarn, "You _saw_ my actions and viewed them as hostile because you couldn't _understand_ what I _said _and applied your own reasoning and beliefs to interpret them. But how would a Krogan respond? Would _they_ see that as a threat?" she shook her head in answer to her own question, "No they wouldn't. To them it'd just be considered showing a bit of backbone nothing more nothing less and most assuredly not threatening at all."

"Get to the _point_, _Shepard_." Velarn hissed at her, his patience long since gone.

Shepard glared at him but obliged, "The Asari came to this place and applied their beliefs and peaceful natures to interpret it as a gift to explore the universe from. They passed on their beliefs to those who came after them and used it as a point of unification. But what they failed to take into account was that this place was built by a species completely foreign to them. The Keepers are not a selfless gift left behind by a benevolent race. They are a part of an elaborate _trap_. They are the only ones who know how this station works and actively stand against any who would try to learn its secrets." she gestured at a Keeper that was silently going about its business in the Ambassadors Chamber.

Anderson glanced at it more than a little wary of it at Shepard's words.

"Why? Because the magnificence and grandeur of this station is _supposed_ to draw you in. It's _designed_ as the centre of the Relay network. Its _purpose_ is to be used as the centre of a galactic empire. From here you used the Relays to progress along a path left for you to follow. All of your technological advancements _come from_ the technology found here. The very development of our differing species has been fundamentally controlled both technologically and sociologically by what's been discovered _here_." she flung her hand out towards the open expanse of the lavish Presidium.

"But the greatest achievement of this trap is that _here_ is where the centre of government stands, _here_ holds the records of every populated world, and that makes _here_ the first place to fall." she took a step forward, the intensity in her being near overwhelming to those watching on with carefully schooled faces betrayed by wide eyes. "Being the centre of the Relay network the entire network can be shut down from here isolating every populated system. The centre of government being wiped out means there will be instant chaos and confusion making us easy targets to pick off at their leisure. Knowing the location of every inhabited world means there's nowhere to run."

Shepard looked between the three holographic Councillors, "More than that, the Citadel itself is a massive Relay which the _Keepers_ ensure you don't realize. Sovereign attacked the Citadel because this _Relay's_ secondary function is to recall all the Reapers from Dark Space."

Velarn had had enough. "_STILL_ you persist!" he snarled at her vehemently.

Shepard snarled right back, why couldn't they _LISTEN!_, "A _Reaper_ ripped off your front doors and came so close to ending all life as you know it and _still_ you deny it. You _think_ it was a Geth flagship? Who are _you_ to know Geth advancements and technology? Did you even _think_ of speaking with the Quarians? The _creators_ of the Geth?" she implored in passionate frustration, "_NO!_ In your _arrogance_ and _fear_ of the repercussions of a _Reaper _threat you made yourselves think you are the experts of a sentient AI race only the _Quarians_ have an understanding of. I fucking _DIED_ for you because of _YOUR fear! _Because to think there is a race of sentient machines that have spent millions of years wiping out organics like us is just too hard, it's too much for you to comprehend. _JUST_ _LIKE_ you interpreted my actions before as a threat when I wasn't you've interpreted another race you have _NO_ understanding of and they do _NOT _have peaceful intentions."

"You _DARE_ call _US_ cowards!" Shouted Velarn in outrage.

"That is _enough_." Tevos asserted firmly before things could degenerate even further.

Shepard shook her head, "Don't you get it, can't you _see_ it?" she pleaded with the Asari, her husky voice _begging_ to be heard and actual tears of frustration glistening in her eyes.

"I understand the point you wish to make about interpreting other races different from our own through our own belief system and not theirs therefore not truly understanding them. But you have yet to offer solid and irrefutable proof as to the existence of the Reapers." Tevos spoke though her usually calm voice was strained.

Shepard closed her eyes and bowed her head, her entire body clenching as she fought to remain calm and keep her pesky tears at bay. She _refused_ to cry! How could her body betray her like that!

"It is feared that the Prothean Beacon and Cipher have opened your mind to the lies and manipulations of Saren even now." Tevos looked to the human sadly, sensing the tumultuous emotions roaring through her even from where she stood.

"If that were the case, why would I be so _opposed_ to what he was doing? Why did I _fight_ him every step of the way? Why did I allow the sacrifice of _hundreds_ of humans to _save_ a Council he was trying to destroy? And why am I now trying so hard to get _you_ to see and prepare to fight and defend yourselves _against_ the Reapers when Saren chose to _serve_ them?" She countered softly, her tone laced with _weariness_ after her impassioned outburst.

"You opposed him for he was a threat and in that you fulfilled your expectations as a Spectre." Jabis responded sincerely. "But this obsession with the Reapers _must_ end."

Shepard scoffed, "When the day comes that the Reapers arrive, when their numbers block out the stars and they lay waste to world after world as they did with the Protheans and all who came before them, will you look to me and expect me to save you again?" she looked up, "How long do you think I will stand being mocked and slandered by the very people I am trying desperately to save before I leave you to your fates?" she murmured.

"Then _find proof_." Tevos admonished her, "You swore an oath to protect and uphold the Galactic community..."

Shepard cut her off, "So I'm still a Spectre?"

Velarn snorted and was about to shoot her down when Tevos looked to him sharply.

"We have reviewed your information concerning the Collector attacks on human colonies in the Terminus Systems." Tevos returned her gaze to Shepard. "In light of the fact that we do owe you our lives we are willing to reinstate your Spectre status to investigate these attacks."

"But you must restrict your actions to the Terminus Systems." Velarn growled at her coldly, again in disbelief that she was to be a Spectre when clearly she didn't deserve it in his eyes.

They waited with baited breaths for her response as she just stood there glaring.

"Fine. I accept." Shepard nodded sharply, the words bitter in her mouth but she knew they were necessary.

"We wish you a speedy conclusion to your investigation and your dealings with Cerberus, Commander Shepard." Tevos bowed her head and ended the exchange before any more could be said, the three councillors vanishing from sight.

"You realize that their support is only peripheral." Anderson murmured to her, his heart heavy as he looked at the once pride and joy of humanity.

"As long as they don't actively hunt me down I don't care." Shepard huffed, feeling very disillusioned right now. She'd hoped to find true support, find a way to extricate herself from being solely controlled by Cerberus. She felt like a fool.

"What do you plan to do now?" he asked softly, reaching up and clasping her shoulder.

"I've been given command of a Normandy class vessel that's bigger and more advanced than the Normandy." She felt the instant concern as he stiffened and continued, "I'll be putting together a team of some of the most skilled people in the galaxy. The Illusive Man's given me some excellent dossiers of people who apparently have no affiliation with Cerberus but he also made a point of excluding the people _I_ wanted on my team. Some I understand have moved on to things they can't just drop and follow me but I would feel far more comfortable if I could get one or two on board with me. People I _know_ I can count on and can keep an eye on my Cerberus crew." she looked to Anderson, pleading with him, "I want Williams sir. I know she's on a classified mission, The Illusive Man refused to tell me what and I _know_ he knows what it is. It'll take me some time to get the specialists listed so if she can do whatever it is she's doing within a month...?" she asked hopefully.

"I'll see what I can do." Anderson didn't commit to sending her as Ashleigh Williams was on a critical mission and it disturbed him to know that the Illusive Man knew what it was.

Shepard nodded, asking wasn't just a matter of getting a friend on board, it also showed she was willing to play ball with the Alliance and she hoped it would be enough to keep _them_ off her back seeing as there would probably be no other way Anderson could help her out, "When I have my team we'll begin hunting down the Collector ship to see what we can learn about their home territory. There has to be a reason no ship has ever returned from the Omega-4 relay but theirs. That suggests they have some kind of advanced defence system we'll need to be prepared for and the only way to do that is to get on board their ship and check out their systems. Once that's done and we've figured out how to navigate the relay we'll go through and hit the Collectors where they live and put a stop to the abductions."

Anderson shook his head, "That's suicide even for you Shepard!"

Shepard smirked but it was empty of any mirth, "Tell that to Saren." but she nodded, "It's going to be tougher than hell but at the rate they're going they'll have abducted every human colony we have before too long. I will _not_ allow that to happen." she straightened her shoulders and looked to the Councillor, "I sure as hell don't want to be relying solely on Cerberus either. I'm only agreeing to work with them because they're giving me what I know no one else can. The Council can't be seen to be taking too much of an interest because so far the Collectors have restrained themselves to humans for some reason making it technically a human issue. The Alliance is still rebuilding their losses from Saren and the geth attack. Once this mission is over, if I survive that is, I'll be politely informing the Illusive Man we're through, preferably with a bullet between his eyes but I'm not picky." she growled for emphasis on the last bit.

Anderson sighed, he applauded her courage and tenacity but she was going to need all the help she could get. "William's is currently out in the Terminus attempting to help what colonies we have out there boost their defences, installing Guardian Batteries, teaching self defence courses, that kind of thing." He didn't mention _all_ she was doing and could see that Shepard suspected that.

Shepard nodded, that sure as hell didn't sound classified meaning there was something he wasn't telling her, "I won't interfere, but I would like to at least speak with her. I know it's been over two years for the rest of the galaxy, but for me it's been three days since the Normandy..." she glanced over at the sculpture sadly.

Anderson clasped her shoulder again, he couldn't imagine what she was going through right now. "If you need to talk, my door's always open." he offered sincerely.

"Right now I'm still processing information, catching up on the state of things. Miranda..." her voice faded as she lost the words. She closed her eyes and bowed her head in emotional turmoil.

"She seriously doesn't know who you are?" Anderson was skeptical.

"Not a clue. I just about told her but she made it clear my childhood was of no interest to her. I think she was also a little bit put out there were things she hadn't been able to find out about me. Maybe it was her way of deflecting her own lack of information gathering." Shepard sighed and shrugged her shoulders. "What kills me is that she can look me in the eye and can't see it, can't see _me_. _Why_?" she breathed and it came out almost as a sob, "She's supposed to have a perfect memory, she's a bloody genetic goddess but she can't remember _me_."She could understand Miri moving on emotionally, after all they'd been _kids_ when they'd fallen in love, but to blatantly not recognize her at all not only confused the hell out of her but was breaking her heart.

"And now she's Cerberus' poster girl of the perfect human right?" Anderson pointed out as gently as possible. He couldn't afford for Shepard to lose herself or truly trust the Cerberus Operative, in his mind it was probably a good thing Miranda didn't recognize her as Shepard wouldn't hesitate in picking up at least their friendship. That would open her up to emotional manipulation he didn't want to even consider. He knew she hadn't lost her mind or been manipulated by Saren to believe the Reapers but he also knew she was only human and humans were swayed greatly by the people they loved. Shepard had always walked a fine line, she could show compassion one moment then brutality the next, Torfan was the greatest example of that. If Cerberus ideals started sinking in to her method of thought through Miranda Lawson there would be hell to pay.

Shepard scoffed, not aware of Anderson's true thoughts on the matter, "It's certainly given her opportunities to expand her impressive skills and mind she wouldn't have gotten in the corporate world. She can shoot you between the eyes in a heartbeat, can crush you with her biotics, makes Einstein look like a fool with her vastly superior intellect and has a figure to die for. Not to mention the ego to go with it. She's gonna be a real treat keeping in line." she chuckled, "I've already knocked her out cold and had her sedated and I've only been awake three days."

Anderson laughed, "That's my girl." he clapped her shoulder.

"We'll come to an understanding... eventually. I'm expecting to have my arse whipped at some stage." she chuckled ruefully.

"Well tell me what you need. How can I help you?" he asked, becoming serious again.

"Get me Williams. I'm not going to accept just any Alliance officer and Miranda won't let anyone on board I can't personally vouch for and it'll be pushing the friendship getting Williams on the team. Not that there's much of _that_ present." she grumbled.

Anderson simply nodded, he would make the necessary arrangements for Williams to wrap up on her current assignment and get someone else to take over for her.

"As for supplies, Cerberus is footing the bill and I say let 'em pay. I won't be able to send regular reports but I'll let you know the big stuff. All I wanted out of today was my Spectre status, Williams and not to be hunted down for working with Cerberus." she could tick two things off her list with Williams pending.

"I'll work on Williams. Just stay safe out there Shepard. We lost you once already, let's not lose you again to soon." Anderson assured her grimly.

"You know me." she smirked and saluted, "See you 'round sir." she nodded and promptly left. There were a couple things she wanted to do before returning to the Normandy and she needed to decompress a little after that bloody awful encounter and hoped with everything in her that Miranda wasn't going to fight with her over something. She didn't have anything _left_ emotionally to fight with right now.

* * *

><p><em><strong>So there it is. The Council Reveal. I wanted to make it different obviously but also to highlight that Shepard is intelligent in her arguments most of the time and highly frustrated. I also wanted to drop the hint that there are things in the background wanting to keep these two apart emotionally... and truth be told it's not just the Alliance... <strong>_


	12. You did WHAT?

_**So after all the agnst and tension Seph's been put through I decided it was time for a little relaxation... though it will come at quite the revelation.**_

* * *

><p>"So how'd it go?" Jacob asked her amicably as both he and Miranda fell into step with her.<p>

"I am a Spectre again. We're not going to be hunted down by the Council or Alliance. And Anderson is going to get William's freed to join the team." She glanced at Miranda.

"She's _not_ on the list." Miranda growled at her, she should have seen this coming.

Shepard looked to her with an expression Miranda had never seen. It was... weary, like Shepard was bone tired but she still managed to put enough force in her voice to make herself abundantly clear, "It's _my_ team, Miss Lawson. The Illusive Man makes _suggestions_ but ultimately _I_ decide. If you're worried about Cerberus secrets do what you need to bury them but Williams _will_ be joining us. She's the best goddamn marine I've ever served with and I trust her with my life. Something I can do with _no one _on your precious _list_." her voice was soft but laced with meaning, "Now breakfast this morning bordered on culinary torture. I figured you'd be sitting outside Anderson's office until the meeting was over so now I'd like you to arrange some better food supplies. There are some things I want to get while we're here as well so unless you really want to follow me around it would be quicker to split up and meet back at the Normandy." she changed the subject swiftly.

"Trying to get rid of us so soon?" Miranda drawled, she wasn't going to have a bar of that.

"You're certainly free to join me, just no complaining about my choice of destinations. Perhaps Jacob could sort out the food?" she looked to the man realizing Miranda didn't trust her not to do anything stupid like undermining Cerberus and though it meant spending more time with her she didn't have the strength to argue with her.

He nodded, the food _had_ been terrible, "I can manage that. Anywhere in particular you had in mind?"

"We'll head back to Zakera Ward. You'll find the best food supplies in the Citadel there." Shepard flicked on her omni-tool and ran a quick search, "We used them for the Normandy, granted we didn't actually have our own _chef_. Get in touch with Gardner and see if he's got any special requests." she forwarded on the details for him. "Miss Lawson." she nodded to her and strode away expecting the operatives to fall in with her if. First thing she wanted was a drink.

Upon arriving at Zakera Ward, Jacob departed the company of the two women in search of the supplier for Shepard.

Miranda had been subtly watching Shepard closely. She hadn't said a single word since leaving the Councillor's chamber and looked... deflated. Things had not gone well in there clearly. Falling into step with her she wasn't all that surprised when Shepard strode into the Dark Star lounge.

The Dark Star was one of the more upper class establishments. It was clean but not garishly bright like the bars and clubs on the Presidium nor was it dark and seedy like Chora's Den had been. It was a nice in-between atmosphere, a place to dance or drink your cares away without having scum drooling over your arse.

Shepard ordered a bottle of Serrice Ice Brandy and two glasses. Then without even looking at Miranda she made her way over to a more private booth. Automatically she positioned herself to face the door and sunk down into the plush seating tiredly.

Miranda wouldn't openly admit to how much she felt like a drink herself after the past few days but she did slide into the booth gracefully and accepted the shot Shepard slid over to her wordlessly with a nod of thanks.

Neither of them spoke for the first couple shots.

It was Miranda who broke the silence between them. "I take it things didn't go so well." she was impressed that there was no hint of smugness in her tone as she'd known it wouldn't go as smoothly as Shepard had been naively hoping.

"No." Was all Shepard muttered, scowling into her fourth shot and mentally cursing her new metabolism as she wasn't even feeling the usual warm and fuzzy feeling of the comforting drink.

Miranda sipped her brandy, still only on her second as she wasn't about to let herself get tipsy with the Commander. Instead she was analysing and calculating her options. To ask Shepard if she'd expected the Council to welcome her back with open arms would only arouse Shepard's ire and that was the _last_ thing she wanted right now. Watching Shepard's face closely she asked softly and carefully, "Do you want to talk about it?"

Shepard looked up from her glass in surprise at the softly spoken question. Miranda's expression was neutrally masked and unreadable right now though. "I kind of expected it to go the way it did but _hoped_ it'd be better." she sighed. "They made it clear they think I'm mentally unstable so I gave them a damn good argument. I put on the fierce face and snarled at them in Prothean which of course they took as a threat. But thing was what I'd actually _said_ was the very opposite of threatening." she sat up a little, "I wanted to show them that the interpretations they place on others they base on their own backgrounds and biases. For instance a Krogan wouldn't have taken my body language as threatening whereas they did."

Miranda listened to more than just what she was saying, there was a sense of _aching_ flowing through those golden amber eyes. Even her biotics were tingling a little because of the woman sitting opposite her, she couldn't _see_ any flaring but Shepard's biotics were definitely unsettled.

"Every race has found the Mass Relays and put their own interpretation on them, that they were left behind by a race of explorers, never realizing that they're a trap of the Reapers. You see since finding them we've been basing our technology off of them and following them to settle worlds they've taken us to. That's _exactly_ what the Reapers want. They guide the development of organic species through the Relays. They impose _order upon chaos_." she growled in a mock Sovereign impersonation.

Miranda's jaw clenched a little and her eyes narrowed slightly at that revelation. No one had been really sure how much Shepard actually knew about the Reapers, she was definitely going to be following this up on the Normandy.

"And no one has a fucking clue. The Relay's and the Citadel are the opposite of what I presented to the Council. The meaning of my words were complimentary while what they could _see _was hostile. What we _see_ of the Relays is complimentary but their meaning is a threat to all sentient life. And the Council just _won't_ see it." she finished with an angry hiss, glaring back at her empty glass. In a jerky movement she filled it almost to the brim and took a deep swig of the potent alcohol.

Miranda was a little alarmed by the move but bit her lip from saying anything about it for now. Instead she spoke to what Shepard had said, "Shepard the _Council_ may not believe you. But _I_ do." she purposefully did not mention Cerberus, she'd come to understand that right now there was nothing she could do to convince Shepard of the good Cerberus could do until she'd addressed what they'd argued about yesterday.

Shepard lowered her glass and looked to Miranda with a wary expression.

"I wouldn't be here if I didn't." Miranda continued quickly as it was clear Shepard was about to argue from the flash in her eyes, "The Council may not wish to accept that there is a threat out there greater than anything they've ever faced before because a _human_ brought them the warning but I've seen your reports, I've seen the evidence they refuse to acknowledge. You and I may not see eye to eye on many things but this, this we are in agreement, that the Reapers exist and must be stopped." she looked to Shepard firmly then pointedly at the bottle of brandy, "Which will not happen," she returned her sharp gaze to meet Shepard's, "if you prefer to drown your sorrows in bars."

Shepard actually chuckled and shook her head, "You know ordinarily I'd be in a very happy place right now, warm, fuzzy and completely uncaring of my surroundings. Should I be pissed at you for ensuring I _can't_ get drunk? Or pleased that it'll take a hell of a lot more than a single bottle of brandy to warm me up?"

Miranda smirked, "Call it an assurance that you remain in command of your senses during the mission. Once we're done _then_ you can drink until your heart's content and find out just how much it'll take to get you drunk."

Shepard poured herself a final glass then topped up Miranda's before she capped the bottle, "Perhaps you could join me because once we're done with the Collectors I think we'll _both_ have earned a couple drinks." she smirked, "You probably more than me for having to put up with me." she held up her charged glass to Miranda.

Miranda considered her then actually smiled and tapped her glass to Shepard's, "Commander, you have a deal, though you'll more than likely owe me more than a couple drinks for putting up with you."

Shepard laughed and found it incredibly relaxing, "Cheers to that." she brought the glass to her lips and downed the contents with an experienced toss.

Miranda finished the rest of hers as well, she didn't mind the brandy, it wasn't her usual drink but it was smooth and deceptively warming without being sharp or sitting heavy.

Shepard slid out from the booth, "Thanks Miss Lawson, I needed to hear I'm not alone." she offered genuinely.

"Just don't make it a habit Commander, I'll just slap your arse with a warp next time." Miranda smirked and was surprised at the chuckle it elicited from Shepard.

"I'll keep that in mind." Shepard nodded and led the way out of the Dark Star.

They didn't head straight back to the ship but rather Shepard took them to a tech shop. There were some software packages she was interested in finding out how they'd been upgraded in the past two years.

Miranda followed her wordlessly. She seemed to know where she was going and the way she carried herself now drew curious glances from the people they passed. Shepard had a kind of... swagger that exuded confidence and made her look... damn sexy in that armour. She shook herself for thinking such a thing and noticed that any Asari they passed paid very particular attention to Shepard. It almost made her want to walk closer to Shepard and glare at them possessively. Damnit _she_ was being drawn in by the walk! Gritting her teeth she quickly moved up to walk _beside_ Shepard so she didn't have to see it. The brandy was clearly a lot stronger than she'd anticipated.

Shepard noted Miranda looked somewhat annoyed, she just didn't realize what it was actually about, "Look, all I'm going to get is some stuff for my omni-tool, check out some weapon mods and get some fish for that impressive fish tank in the loft. It looks kinda stupid being empty. And I wouldn't mind getting some model ships for the display case. I know you have a lot to do, babysitting me further really isn't necessary." she shifted uncomfortably, ordinarily the thought of shopping with Miri would have been wonderful but this was not ordinary and both of them still had walls up over their recent fights, even after sharing a couple drinks. Miranda still didn't know who she was, she wasn't there just for the fun of shopping but rather to keep an eye on her and make sure she didn't betray Cerberus.

Miranda wondered if Shepard was feeling uncomfortable at appearing weak before her and decided that if she was to avoid any negative repercussions she'd need to show the Commander that she wasn't going to hold it against her. Knowing what she did about the Commander she'd have been surprised if she _hadn't_ been a little down at the Council's response to her. "I can help you select what software and modifications you'd find most valuable, given the advances in technology since you went shopping last." she offered brusquely. She noticed Shepard relaxed a little and a smile tugged at the corner of those sensual lips.

"I'd appreciate that Miss Lawson, thank you. I don't want to sound like a _complete_ fool after all." Shepard reached up and rubbed the back of her neck, an old habit of nervousness. She hoped this would help ease the tension between them, the drinks had seemed to help a little in that regard at least.

Miranda considered her, surprised by the quick acceptance of her offer, "You want me here, why?" she asked, suddenly suspicious again. Though her gut told her it wasn't anything related to turning her over to the Alliance or Council.

Shepard shrugged, "Hey, it's not every day I get to go shopping with one... beautiful woman." she cringed as she couldn't _believe_ she'd just said that! Her mind had almost caught it but it had slipped out before she could stop it.

Miranda's brows rose, "I thought you preferred Asari." thinking of Liara T'Soni.

Shepard looked at her curiously, "Why would you think that?"

"You and Liara T'Soni were in a relationship were you not?" Miranda glanced at an Asari that was blatantly admiring Shepard.

"No. Liara understood that I cared for her deeply as a friend but there was nothing more." Shepard shook her head. Of course she'd _known_ Liara wanted more than just friendship from her, she'd felt it every time they'd joined minds for various purposes. She'd just always held back from relationships as her heart had already been taken.

"That's not the impression I got from Liara." Miranda considered Shepard closely, from what Liara had gone through to help recover her body she'd have thought the pair were bond mates.

Shepard sighed, "There was nothing more from _me._ You know that girl I was separated from? My heart's always belonged to her. I... have always hoped I'd find her again but you know, her father is a powerful man. I mean clearly he intercepted all of my messages to her and I like to imagine she'd written to me but he'd blocked them as well. He... did a lot of horrific things to her to control her. I tried so hard to get back to her but I was too young and had no training." she gave a half-hearted laugh, "You know she's the reason I embraced my military training so completely, it wasn't just about what happened to mum on Mindoir. I thought that one day I'd go back for her. I'd tear through her father's defences and free her, protect her from him." she smirked, "I did you know. Granted no tearing, I snuck in. Passed all his top notch security and brute guards only to find she wasn't even there, she'd gotten out on her own. I got in so much trouble with my superior officer for sneaking out on graduation." she had a faraway look in her eyes and a sad smile on her face. _That_ had been a very enlightening trip, in many, many ways. She was telling Miranda she'd gone back for her and Miranda didn't even know. She suddenly cleared her throat, "Sorry, not mission related, not interested."

Miranda observed as Shepard closed down emotionally. She had just caught glimpse of something probably no one other than Liara had in a very long time. That Shepard loved someone so deeply, so completely she'd been willing to face down the wrath of the man who'd had her own father murdered to reach her love. "You loved her a great deal." she observed softly.

"Still do." Shepard murmured, "I know we were young, so young, but she was the one you know. I didn't know if I'd ever see her again so I tried... other relationships but..."

"They didn't fit like she did." Miranda murmured, everything Shepard was saying mirrored with her. She remembered Persephone clearly, her first love ripped away by her father never to be seen again.

"What was her name?" Shepard asked softly her heart falling a little.

Miranda shifted uncomfortably now, "Persephone."

Shepard stopped dead in her tracks.

Miranda frowned and turned back to her, "What?"

"Miranda look at me." Shepard's heart raced and her breathing was shallow as she tried to figure this out.

Miranda was already looking at Shepard and cocked her head slightly, curious at this reaction.

"Who do you see?" She asked softly, her husky voice low and tightly controlled.

"Commander Stephanie Shepard, first human Spectre..." Miranda answered straight away and began to list the usual accolades.

Shepard shook her head, "Is that _all_ you see?"

Miranda frowned, "What are you getting at Shepard?" she felt something very uncomfortable trickling through her mind, up and down her spine and it was making her annoyed, very quickly.

"You don't see anyone else, I don't _remind_ you of someone else?" Shepard asked again in that low husky voice, her amber eyes boring into cobalt.

"No. You are Stephanie Shepard. Is there someone you're expecting me to be reminded of?" Miranda asked with increasing irritation and a sudden pounding behind her right eye as a headache was being brought on. She assumed it was from the drinks and was eager to get this shopping over and done with and return to the Normandy.

Shepard exhaled a pent up breath and her shoulders slumped, she began walking again, "Clearly not. This Persephone of yours, what would you do if you saw her again?" she pretended to change the subject.

Miranda fell into step with her once more, once again confused by the frustrating woman beside her. "I... don't know. So much time has passed, we're different people. _I'm_ different. I highly doubt she'd even _like_ the person I've become." she checked herself, she couldn't _believe_ she'd just told that to _Shepard! _It had to be the booze and the oncoming headache.

"Do _you_ like the person you've become?" Shepard asked, her voice still soft, almost tender if it wasn't so sad.

"This is getting too personal Commander." Miranda shook her head and walked forward with more determination to leave the conversation behind and to get back to the Normandy before this headache progressed much more.

Shepard let it drop with a sigh. Of course there was no getting personal with Miranda _Lawson._ So now she knew Miranda _hadn't_ forgotten her entirely and it sounded like she still cared. So why the _hell_ couldn't she _recognize_ her? Something had happened. Someone _had_ to have messed with her brain or something. Perhaps her father? It'd make sense seeing as he tried to kill her and all. She frowned, no that didn't make sense either. Miranda had run away from her father. She still remembered her. But when she looked at her she didn't see Persephone, she saw _Stephanie_, saw what the _Alliance_ had created. Damn it all to hell it was making her head spin. She shook herself and quickly caught up with Miranda.

Inside the electronics store Shepard described to Miranda what she was looking for, which surprised the woman as she hadn't realized just how technologically oriented Shepard was as on Freedom's Progress she'd looked to her to hack the lock to the security centre. Then she realized that was because Shepard may have been given a sophisticated omni-tool but it didn't have much of anything in the way of _software_. She was even more impressed when Shepard took the time to look over the programming codes before making her selections.

Shepard sheepishly made one more request of the eager salarian store clerk, "What kind of musical attachments do you have? Any human piano?"

Miranda looked to her somewhat surprised, "You play piano?" _That_ hadn't been in her files either!

"No. I asked for a piano attachment because I think it looks pretty." Shepard responded dryly.

Miranda scowled.

"It's soothing, especially when I don't want to go around breaking my fist and punching bags or unsuspecting operatives in the jaw." she smirked, reaching up and lightly touching her jaw, "How's it feeling by the way?"

Miranda knocked her hand away with a growl, "You're not the only one with enhancements."

"And _still_ I knocked you out in one hit." her smirk widened, "Granted you _did_ up my strength and bone structure so I hit harder than a Krogan."

Miranda scoffed and picked one of the attachments, "She'll take that one." It was the one she had for her own omni-tool, it was the top of the line and had different modes ranging from a child's keyboard to a majestic grand piano. She also wasn't in the mood for banter though thankfully the headache was receding of its own accord.

"Hang on, do I at _least_ get to try it out?" Shepard complained, though she _was_ enjoying the teasing with Miranda. Perhaps if she interacted with Miranda like they'd used to as kids it would somehow break through this block she seemed to have. She'd teased Miranda mercilessly at times just to make her smile and being the cute kid she was she'd wormed her way into the older girls heart back then.

"Make it quick." Miranda snapped and crossed her arms, glaring at the infuriating woman.

Shepard plugged it in and selected the grand option. Taking off her gauntlets she shook out her hands and played a couple scales to get a feel for the holographic keys.

Miranda, being a skilled pianist herself, noted Shepard wasn't half bad. Then she stilled as she began to play a _very_ familiar piece. Nielsons Fifth Adagio Movement. It was her favourite and Shepard played it beautifully.

Halfway through Shepard stopped playing with a nod, "Sounds brilliant, nice choice Miss Lawson, I'll take it."

Miranda was rather sorry that she'd stopped playing. Wordlessly she went about paying for it all.

Shepard thanked the clerk who was clearly pleased at such a big sale. Next came the weapon mods. Again Miranda took her through them expertly and they put in a bulk order for the Normandy as Cerberus had only had time to put in the basics with the rushed outfit of the vessel. Miranda was getting impatient as Shepard went to a souvenir shop and looked over the fish for an aesthetically appealing selection that wouldn't eat each other in the tank. Lastly she added a couple ship models, one of the _Destiny Ascension,_ the _Normandy _and _Sovereign_. Shepard smirked at the Reaper, she was going to have some fun with it.

"So any particular reason you picked the Reaper?" Miranda asked curiously as they walked back quickly to the Normandy.

Shepard chuckled darkly, "Oh you'll have to wait and see Miss Lawson."

Miranda arched her brow intrigued but saying nothing more.

With all the shopping she'd wanted to do completed they headed back to the ship. Much to Miranda's relief.

Shepard nodded to Bailey as they passed and he grinned and nodded back to the reinstated Spectre. "Miss Lawson," she turned to the woman beside her, "thank you for today. I really appreciated you taking the time to..." her words trailed off as Miranda's expression began to change. It was her expression of when she could see something wasn't quite right and she was trying to put her finger on what exactly it was. Shepard looked out to the docking bay for what had caught her attention. There wasn't anything in the immediate vicinity other than the ship. The ship... oh crap!

"Is there something I should _know_, _Commander_?" Miranda's tone was frigid, colder than ice. She stood there with her hand on her hip and her cobalt blue eyes lancing through Shepard.

Shepard took a deep breath and turned back to the infuriated woman, "Anything in particular you have in mind?" she stood at the ready with her shoulders back, her biotics tingling and her feet braced.

"How in the _hell_ did you think you could get away with _defacing_ Cerberus property?" Miranda hissed at her in fury.

"Defacing?" Shepard looked back at the ship feigning confusion, "_Oh_ you mean I had the logo removed. I'd hardly call that defacing, I mean look at it, isn't it such a beautiful job." she gestured to the ship keeping her tone light.

"You had _no_ authority..." Miranda's mind reeled as she tried to figure out how Shepard had gotten something like that passed her, "How the _hell_ did you even _do_ it?"

Shepard shrugged, "I had a word with the painters and they took it off all nice and clean."

Miranda stared at her as close to slack jawed as she'd ever been, "You mean _before_ we even left the station?" she gaped at the woman before her.

"Yep." Shepard smirked, "You didn't _really_ think I'd fly around the _Terminus_ in a ship marked as Cerberus when I won't let _you_ walk around with logo's plastered on you did you? Why not paint a big red target on the Normandy's arse flashing 'shoot me' on it?"

Miranda's head began to pound once more and she groaned, "Why indeed." she muttered, thinking of how she could rectify this problem, they still had to wait for their supplies to be delivered to the ship...

Shepard became deadly serious, "Miss Lawson, for a clandestine organization that just about everyone in the galaxy loves to hate you'd think the Illusive Man would be intelligent enough _not_ to plaster his logo on _everything_. We're already going to be getting enough people shooting at us with what we're doing. We _don't_ need to add to that with people who just want to take down anything to do with Cerberus. Our mission is dangerous enough as it is, don't you think?" she pointed out as rationally as she could.

Miranda scowled at her, "Indeed Commander." was all she said with her carefully schooled stoic expression before she stalked off towards the ship.

Shepard remained where she was for a moment, shocked at the lack of argument from the diehard Cerberus Operative. Her eyes narrowed, Miranda was up to something. There was _no way_ she'd let something like this slide so easily. "Ah damnit." she grunted, "Kasumi." she called and a moment later the thief appeared.

"You rang?" She grinned up at the taller woman.

"I'm guessing you heard all that right." It was a statement and not a question.

"Course." Kasumi shrugged, she'd heard a _whole_ lot more than that from the duo.

"Any way you can set something up to keep an eye out for anyone who might get the bright idea to adjust our paintjob?" she asked, smiling more to herself as an idea formed in her mind.

"Easy. I could put up a deterrent to if you like." Kasumi offered, already imagining how fun thought could be.

"Oh no just let me know. I have a plan if Miss Lawson desires to try and get the Cerberus logo repainted." Shepard smirked.

"Do tell!" Kasumi pleaded with sparkling eyes beneath her hood and a delicious grin.

"In due time, Miss Goto." Shepard nodded to her before heading back to the ship in question.

* * *

><p><em><strong>So less angst... still a little, but a lot lighter this time 'round overall I feel... or perhaps it was just cos Shep and Miri weren't going for each others jugulars... <strong>_

_**Fear not faithful readers the discoveries Seph made in her glossed over description of going to rescue her love will be explored in depth at the appointed time! As will Miri's lack of recognition of Persephone. Oh and just for your interests sake Stephanie Shepard's real name is Persephone Eve Calleyuss... and it has significant meaning.**_

_**A few lighter chapters coming up**__**. **_


	13. Unwinding

First thing Shepard did was sort out her fish. She jumped in surprise at the voice behind her.

"So you gonna name them?" Kasumi grinned, pleased to make her jump once again.

"Geez woman! Can we refrain from giving me heart attacks in my own quarters?" she muttered, hand to her chest and casting a quick glare at the thief.

Kasumi chuckled, "If you insist. So names?"

"They're _fish_. They'll be lucky if I feed them let alone _name_ them." Shepard shrugged.

"Oh the poor fish! Why'd you get them then?" Kasumi made herself comfortable on the lounge facing the tank.

"The tank looked stupid empty. I mean look at the size of it! If they're going to waste all this space with it might as well put it to use. So how do they look?" she asked moving to sit next to the woman and take in the view.

"Well it's better than an empty tank." Kasumi agreed, "I like those little blue ones."

"Yeah, thought they were pretty cute." Shepard shrugged, reaching over to the cooling unit and pulling out a bottle of wine and a couple glasses.

Kasumi glanced at her slyly, "I seem to recall you also think a certain operative is pretty cute." she grinned.

"Aw come on, she's a bloody goddess, cute doesn't even cover it." Shepard shot back amicably and poured her a glass.

Kasumi chuckled accepting the red wine, "So she told you her mysterious love's name is Persephone, awesome name by the way, but you never told her yours."

"_That_ will take a few more drinks, then you'll laugh your arse off if I decide to tell you." Shepard smirked and poured her own drink.

"Oh and why's that?" Kasumi loved a good gossip and was surprised that Shepard had relaxed beside her and not on the other arm of the lounge.

"You'll have to wait and see. Now did you come up here to dig for gossip or did you have something else in mind?" Shepard sipped her wine, admiring her new fish.

"Actually had something else in mind. Did Mr. Illusive happen to mention what our arrangement is?" Kasumi asked, eager to get business done to work on finding out who Shepard pined for.

"Nothing other than how to reach you. Why?" Shepard looked to her with a touch of wariness.

"Ah. I see. Well I agreed to join your team in exchange for your help with something." Kasumi had _hoped_ Shepard at least had a vague idea but would have to work with what she had.

"Let me guess, you want my help on a heist?" Shepard smirked, mulling that over.

"Yep. Not just any heist. Ever heard of Donovan Hock?" At the blank look on Shepard's face she smirked, "I suppose not, he'd be dead otherwise." she chuckled before continuing on, "He's a big time mercenary, respected and feared out in Terminus with his lavish mansion residing on Benkenstein. He's also into art in a big way, rumour has it his vault holds some of the most priceless pieces from a range of races." she looked away wistfully at the very thought of it.

"So you want my help stealing some priceless art?" Shepard frowned, not sure she liked the idea of that even if he _was_ a merc.

"No." All humour left her, "My partner, Keigi Okuda, came across some highly sensitive data. He never said what it was but that data got him killed. Hock somehow found out about the data and had him killed for his graybox. That graybox contains priceless personal memories but also has something to do with the Alliance and it has to be big for Hock to go to all the trouble of hunting him down and killing him." she swirled the wine in her glass, studying it as it swirled smoothly.

"And you don't think Hock will have that data from it yet? How long has he had it?" Shepard asked softly, sensing the deep sadness in the woman, Keigi was more than a partner in crime to Kasumi.

"Keigi was a master at encrypting files. There's _no way_ Hock would be able to decrypt them within ten years let along five months." she turned to look up at Shepard, "I can't do this one alone Shepard. I need your help." she _pleaded_ with the woman.

Shepard considered her for a long moment before nodded, "You have a plan?"

"I do. He's hosting a party for some of the galaxy's lowest scum in a couple weeks. I've already begun giving you a background as a mercenary that'll catch his eye and get you invited. We sneak in, scope the vault, break in, get the graybox and walk out. Shouldn't even have to fire a single shot." Kasumi assured her eagerly.

Shepard burst out laughing, "Really? Have you _heard_ how I operate? Someone _always_ ends up shooting at me, something _always_ ends up blowing up. Inviting me along is just begging for trouble."

"Yeah I did get that impression. Should be fun." Kasumi grinned. Her omni-tool pinged and she quickly activated it, "Looks like _Miss Lawson_ has arranged for a touch up afterall."

Shepard smirked, "Thought she would. EDI where is Operative Lawson right now?"

"She's in her quarters." EDI responded promptly.

"Alert me if she leaves please, also alert me if she receives any communication from the people putting the logo on the hull but under no circumstances are you to inform her of my knowledge of these events." she instructed the AI.

"As you wish Commander." EDI acknowledged, suddenly rather curious about what was going on between the Commander and Operative Lawson.

Kasumi grinned, Shep was so planning something and she couldn't _wait_ to see it or Miranda's response to it.

It was an hour later that Miranda was contacted by the people who'd just finished putting on the logo. Shepard bided her time as Miranda went out to inspect the work and transfer the credits completely unaware that _Kasumi_ had followed her out and was waiting for her to return to the ship.

When Miranda was out of sight Kasumi approached the guy in charge, "You might not want to begin packing up your gear yet." she grinned up at the human.

"Eh? Why's that?" he frowned, scratching his cheek curiously.

"The Commander wants that logo you just painted removed now that her XO's seen it and will pay you double the removal costs." Kasumi held up her omni-tool and showed him the credits.

He whistled, "Sounds fine to me." he really didn't care so long as he was paid and this job was turning out to pay more than he'd thought it would. Besides taking it off wouldn't take nearly as long as putting it on.

Kasumi grinned, "The Commander will be very grateful." she bowed her head and sauntered off to return to the Loft with her mission accomplished.

The door chimed.

"Kelly has some packages for you Commander." EDI informed her curiously wondering what they contained.

"Oh let her in." Shepard put down her glass and reached for a third.

"Commander these packages arrived for you." Kelly strode in with the three boxes stacked in her arms, looking around for the Commander and not seeing her immediately.

"Bring them down here Kelly." Shepard called, pouring her a drink.

Kelly was very surprised to find Shepard with the new crew member sharing a glass of wine in her private quarters, then she noticed Shepard was holding out a glass for _her_.

"Just set them down next to the table and I'll sort them out." Shepard smiled, nodding where she meant.

Kelly did so and accepted the glass, "Thank you."

"Kelly, Kasumi. Kelly's my yeoman so if you ever need to reach me and can't find me or I'm busy... most likely busy." she amended at the look on Kasumi's face that said there would be no where she could hide she couldn't be found, "leave a message with her. Kasumi is our resident infiltration expert, need anything juicy I'm sure she'd be happy to lend a hand." she smirked.

"Oh definitely." Kasumi chuckled, "Speaking of juicy, want me to find out about this Persephone of Miranda's?" she glanced at Shepard slyly.

Shepard chuckled, "Go ahead, better yet find a picture of her. When you do find out about her, you'll find out about mine."

"Oh incentive! Done!" Kasumi agreed readily and would have left then and there but hadn't finished her wine yet and it was a crime to waste such an excellent beverage.

"Who's this Persephone?" Kelly asked curiously.

"Apparently Miranda's long lost love. Shepard was hitting on her and they got to talking about their hearts already pining for someone else."

"I was _not_ hitting on her. Kelly don't you agree it's more interesting going shopping with a beautiful woman?" she looked to the yeoman to back her up.

"Oh absolutely." Kelly grinned, totally agreeing with her sentiment, "Shopping with you would be _very_ interesting." she winked.

Shepard's brow furrowed a little and she blushed.

"Aw how cute! The mighty Commander Shepard blushes at being called beautiful!" Kasumi cackled gleefully.

Shepard rubbed her neck anxiously, "It's been a long time since anyone's thought of me and beautiful in the same sentence." she murmured.

"That's wrong on so many levels! Just _who_ have you been hanging out with woman." Kasumi elbowed her, "You're _gorgeous_." even with the scars on her face she was pretty and her figure was to _die for!_

Shepard stood and walked over to the tank, "Before... before the Lazarus Project I was heavily scarred. Miranda had my scars removed during my restoration."

"That was nice of her." Kasumi smiled and glanced at Kelly who was vigorously shaking her head in alarm.

Shepard took a deep breath then threw her head back and skulled her wine. "Yeah." she muttered darkly. Returning to the cooler she poured herself another glass.

Both women noticed the instant change in her and tried to buoy her back up with their combined cheerfulness. Kelly knew the reason why and Kasumi gathered it had something to do with Shepard's scars. After a few glasses they'd gotten out the model of Sovereign and were working on assembling it and having a blast. Kelly and Kasumi chatting away while Shepard concentrated on the model, chipping in to the conversation every now and then but more than happy to just sit and listen and absorb the cheerful aura's of the women with her.

They were almost done when Miranda came in, no door chime, just walked straight on in.

Shepard bit down her annoyance and simply smiled, "Miss Lawson, care for a glass?" she offered.

Miranda took in the scene before her. Clearly from Kelly and Kasumi's flushed faces they'd already had a few drinks and were starting to get a little tipsy as Kasumi was grinning up at her like a child with a secret and Kelly looked like she'd been caught with her hand in the cookie jar. They were gathered around the coffee table that had a mostly complete model ship of Sovereign in the centre of it. "No. We're ready to leave for Omega when you say the word." she informed curtly, this was no time for mucking around with toy ships. They'd received the package from Tali with the live samples, the logo had been repainted and it was time to go before Shepard could figure out what she'd done.

Shepard tapped her communicator, "Joker, take us out, we've got a date with Aria." she was grinning, not at the prospect of seeing Aria but at the fact she'd had the cursed logo removed from the hull for a _second_ time and Miranda appeared none the wiser.

"_Oh you've got to take pictures this time Commander!_" Joker sounded excited at the prospect.

"You've got enough asari porn on your console to make EDI blush." she returned.

EDI's avatar popped up, "I cannot blush, Commander, that requires an increased blood flow to the facial region of which I have neither blood nor a face."

"Oh I'm sure you could get creative if you wanted to, make some systems spark a little, change the colour of your avatar." Shepard grinned.

EDI considered it, "This avatar was chosen to ensure the crew do not humanize me or feel uncomfortable with me. It would be inappropriate to do as you suggest Commander."

"Give it time EDI, give it time." Shepard gave her small lopsided smile. They felt the subtle shift of the ship as Joker began to take them out and she tapped off her communicator, "Sure you don't want to stay for a glass Miss Lawson? We'll be travelling for a minimum twenty hours so have plenty of time."

Miranda shot her an annoyed look, "I've got work to do, especially after wasting time with your little shopping spree." she snapped and stalked out, still pissed off about the paintjob.

"Thanks for coming by the way. I really appreciated your help." Shepard shot back, meaning her words but totally annoyed with the woman now.

Miranda didn't even hesitate or respond.

"That was a little harsh." Kasumi glanced at Shepard to catch the dark scowl before she quickly cleared the emotion from her face.

"Miranda Lawson isn't known for being friendly. I'm actually surprised you got her to admit _anything_ personal to you." Kelly nodded towards the Commander.

"Persephone must be quite the woman to have captured the heart of the Ice Queen." Kasumi grinned, trying to lighten the mood.

"Or she's become the Ice Queen since losing her." Shepard suggested softly. She got up and went to the drawers by her bed.

"Ah a tragic romance that broke the heart of the brilliant and beautiful Miranda Lawson. Will she finally heal if they ever find each other again?" Kasumi posed theatrically putting her hand to her chest.

Shepard scoffed, "Depends if she recognized her wouldn't it." she muttered.

"Of _course_ she'd recognize her! She's her lost love? Who _wouldn't_ remember the face of the only one who's captured their heart?" Kasumi overheard the comment.

"Miranda fucking Lawson." Shepard muttered under her breath.

Kelly and Kasumi were more than a little concerned when she returned with a gun.

"Uh, what ya gonna do with that Shep?" Kasumi asked hesitantly.

Shepard's grin was maniacal and she chuckled darkly, "Why I'm gonna put a couple rounds in Sovereign then sink it in the tank. Something for the fishies to play with."

They both burst out laughing at Shepard's idea, laughing so hard they cried in their tipsy states. Meanwhile Shepard had taken the completed model over to her bed and set it down. Taking a few steps back she lined up her shot.

"You fucking ruined my life Sovereign. I'm going to _stop_ the rest of your kind." she growled to it before taking a couple shots and smashing the model.

The internal ship alarm went off at the weapons fire detected.

"EDI switch that thing off it was just me." Shepard snapped.

It was immediately silenced.

Gathering up the pieces she placed them in the tank with Kelly and Kasumi's aesthetic observations of how they should be positioned for the best look. She was elbow deep in the tank when Miranda stormed in.

"What the hell Shepard!" Miranda demanded, hand on her hip and glaring angrily at the woman who looked quite comical where she was.

Shepard grinned, "Come see." she gestured with her head.

Stalking over to where Kelly and Kasumi were standing she rolled her eyes, "_That's_ why you got the Reaper?"

"Yep." Shepard finished placing the piece in her hands and pulled out, accepting a towel from Kelly.

"You risked putting a hole in the hull to sink a toy Reaper ship?" She groaned.

"Yep." Shepard smirked.

"Bloody childish. Any other toys you intend on shooting in here?" Miranda muttered in frustration.

"Depends. If I can get a geth ship might do the same." she shrugged innocently.

"At least shoot it in the armoury will you, it's _designed_ to absorb bullets." Miranda snarled before stalking out again muttering something else about Shepard being childish under her breath. There was no way she could stop the Commander but she could try and control the damage.

"I'll keep that in mind Miss Lawson." Shepard sighed.

"That looks awesome Shep." Kasumi chuckled, "So worth it."

Shepard stepped back to admire her handiwork. "Yep. Sinking Sovereign yet again." Smirking at the ship her vision suddenly changed.

_The ship disappeared around her. Flashes. Flashes of Collectors taking humans. Flashes of Collectors shooting at her on a temperate world. Flashes of Ash in danger. Flashes of something worse, far, far worse she couldn't quite see or identify. A deep voice that sounded like a Reaper whispered in her mind as the flashes continued._

_"We are Harbinger." _

_A glowing Collector was approaching her and she could feel its sinister and malevolent power. It was the voice. But it was not a Collector. _

"Shit!" Shepard hissed, jumping back and lighting up her biotics defensively.

"Whoa Shep easy, he's dead already!" Kasumi quickly tried to get Shepard's attention before she did something dangerous.

Shepard groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose as her mind adjusted to where she was. She was on the Normandy. There were no Collectors here. She released the dark energy harmlessly.

"Are you alright?" Kelly asked in concern.

"Flashback that's all." she muttered. "Thanks for joining me for drinks. Your lounge next time?" she flashed a weak smile at Kasumi.

"Sure thing Shep." Kasumi nodded, she decided she liked the woman who'd turned out to be quite entertaining when she did join in the conversation between her and Kelly. She wasn't aware that the reason Shepard had been rather subdued was because of the reminder of her scars. Shepard wasn't anything like she'd expected and she looked forward to getting to know her.

Shepard decided to have a shower, debating on if she should talk with Miranda or perhaps Doc Chakwas about the vision. She decided neither as she dried off and went to get into a change of clothes. "EDI?"

"Yes Commander?" The AI's avatar popped up.

"Just for interest sake can you mark the moment I flared my biotics earlier and make a note of the name _Harbinger_ for me." she asked the AI.

"Certainly, do you wish to note why this is important?" EDI asked curiously.

"I'm not sure what I had before _was_ actually a flashback. It felt like the Prothean vision but it wasn't of Reapers and Protheans, it was of Collectors and what I thought was the leader called itself Harbinger but somehow I _knew_ it wasn't a Collector, it was something else and it sounded a hell of a lot like Sovereign." Shepard was a little unnerved by it still. "Just in case something similar happens or we meet something called Harbinger, remind me of today and see if there was anything out of the ordinary going on somewhere around the time of this... vision thing." she sighed and rubbed her neck.

"Certainly Commander." EDI acknowledged the order and set to work, pleased to be doing something interesting.


	14. The Beast Within

_**Seeing as last chapter was shorter than what my average has turned out to be and this one is as well I thought I'd let you have both today instead of posting tomorrow! What can I say, I'm a sucker for reviews. This one will be a little different. Up till now I've been highlighting that something's been done to Miri. Last chapter showed you there's something different about Shepard. THIS chapter will begin to show just how different Shepard actually is as Miri isn't the only one who was messed with...  
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><p>Shepard was pleased to note that Miranda had removed the Cerberus logo from her 'armour' though she wished Miranda would actually <em>wear<em> some armour. The cat suit was incredibly sexy and sure she had excellent shields and biotics but it made her feel uneasy that Miranda _looked_ vulnerable. Perhaps that was a part of her armour, she wasn't seen as much of a threat when in fact she was the next most dangerous person in the field next to Shepard.

Miranda rolled her eyes, "What is it now Commander?" she growled, she'd taken off the logo what _more_ did she want.

"Sorry, was mulling over something." Shepard flushed and walked on quickly, Omega was not a place to dawdle.

"While staring at _me_." Miranda didn't let it drop.

Shepard sighed, "Fine. Just don't hit me. I was... concerned about your uniform."

Miranda's expression showed her annoyance.

"I'm used to working with soldiers or people who wore at least a light armour. That doesn't look like armour to me and I _know_ it's got top notch shields and you've got your biotics which combined is _better_ than most light armours. It just... looks vulnerable. So I was musing that it's probably actually an asset. It means opponents won't take you as seriously because you don't _look_ like a soldier or a merc so they underestimate you when in fact you're the most dangerous individual on the field." Shepard quickly explained.

Miranda relaxed and actually let a small smile touch her lips at the compliment. Any response she could have made was cut off by a heavily armoured Batarian approaching them.

Shepard nodded to him, "Gritch."

"Shepard." He grunted, "Aria wants to see you, _now_." he thumbed over his shoulder.

"Ah, saves me the trouble of asking to see her. Lead the way old man." Shepard couldn't stomach grinning at the Batarian but wasn't being offensive to him either.

He grunted, but grinned a little, it was hard _not_ to like the human after the mess she'd left Aria in last time she was here.

They were given a free pass to walk straight passed the line to get into the club Afterlife which was Aria's den of iniquity and where she'd established the seat of her power. Asari strippers and dancers were entertaining groups of drunks of almost every major race. Flashing lights, heady music, a giant holographic display of an erotic asari dancer in the centre and the smell of sweat, blood and booze assaulted their senses. Everything about the place screamed at Shepard, she truly did _hate_ this place but Aria was useful, for now.

Over at the bar a flash of yellow armour caught her attention. She grinned and sauntered over to it. Slapping the merc on the back just as he was about to down his shot.

Massani choked on his drink and went for his gun only to find it missing.

"You're losing your touch old boy. Sure you're up for this mission?" Shepard teased him.

"Bloody hell Shepard. You owe me a drink." Massani glared at her.

"I believe that's even. Get your wrinkled arse on my ship, the Normandy, dock six." she winked and patted his shoulder.

"You gonna see Aria?" He grabbed his gun from her hands as she offered it back to him. Shepard was the _only_ other person he'd let handle his beloved Jessie and live.

"Yep." Her eyes twinkling a little with anticipation.

He chuckled, "Hell I'm going to your tin can before I see _this_."

Shepard smirked, "Pervert." she continued walking towards the stairs that led up to the personal sanctuary of the Queen of Omega, who was already watching her with keen interest though pretending not to.

Miranda frowned, she hadn't known that Shepard was so familiar with the merc and the familiar greeting with the Batarian thug also had her confused. Shepard had a reputation of, well, she didn't get on well with Batarians.

"Whatever happens up there, don't interfere unless you're sure she's about to get in my head." Shepard warned Miranda and Jacob, Kasumi was floating around somewhere keeping an eye on them.

"What do you think will happen?" Jacob asked curiously.

"She'll try to kick my arse then mind rape me." Shepard smirked and was taking to the stairs a little too eagerly for Miranda's liking.

One gesture from Aria and all the people on her raised platform overlooking her domain just about fled. The only one brave enough to approach was Shepard and she _sauntered_ up the stairs with that seductive swagger that could hook a Justicar. Aria herself was momentarily ensnared until she caught sight of the stunning human below who was also entranced. Her eyes narrowed, "I see Miss Lawson was successful in bringing you back. But just how successful was she?"

Just like that and it was on.

Shepard _danced_ circles around Aria as the powerful asari struck out at her again and again. Her movements were so fluid and graceful, so confident and assured she could _taste_ Aria's lust for her. It was a very careful dance of violence and power play. Aria was quick but she was taller and heavier than Shepard who was a master of hand to hand combat of several forms _including_ some Asari Commando forms she was using to avoid Aria with right now.

That was until Aria actually connected, her elbow grazing Shepard's cheek and knocking her head back slightly. Aria followed up quickly on the micro-second Shepard was shifting her balance, after all, she wasn't the ruler of Omega for her good looks or for playing nice.

Shepard hissed at the heel of Aria's hand that snaked through her defences into her lower right ribs which in a normal human would have resulted in them being cracked or broken, for her it'd merely bruise.

Aria smirked only to receive a sharp knee to her inner thigh which put her off balance then she was thrown back with a powerful blow to her abdomen that left her convulsing for breath as her shocked diaphragm tried to recover.

Shepard met her obsidian glare and waited, the atmosphere around them was highly tense. A few of Aria's goons had been here last time and were wondering if Shepard had the quad's to pull off a repeat performance... if Aria would let her walk away this time if she did.

Aria wanted Shepard so deeply for more than the elusive whisper her biotics hummed when the adrenaline pumped through her, when her biotics simmered just below the surface from being aroused but combat. The human had this sense of wildness about her, oh she _looked _calm and in control on the outside but she _sensed_ the animal within her, that raging beast the Batarians had brought out in her on Torfan she kept so carefully caged. Aria wrapped a stasis field around her, breaking the rules of their heated little dance. She moved in to _take_ Shepard there and then spirits be damned that they had an audience, her eyes were already obsidian and as menacing as they were lust ridden.

Shepard mentally cursed. Aria was a bloody Asari matron and her biotics... her biotics felt different... Shepard didn't have long to figure it out, _especially_ when Aria closed the distance between them and crushed their lips together.

Massani grinned as he'd been _hoping_ Aria'd get the upper hand this time round and wondered how far she'd get before Shepard lost it and _creamed_ her arse.

Miranda was _not_ impressed and stepped forward to intervene.

Weapons were instantly drawn, "Don't even think about it." the Batarian, Gritch, snarled at her. _No one_ interfered with Aria.

Miranda took a different tack then, lighting up her biotics and reaching out to Shepard's.

As soon as their biotics touched the air crackled and sizzled with ozone.

Aria pulled back from Shepard and couldn't hold the stasis field around the fierce biotic storm growing within it. She stumbled back with a sharp hiss, her hand going to her lips that were burning from the shock Shepard had emitted.

Shepard's eyes were glowing red and she lashed out at the Asari, the back of her hand cracking against Aria's cheek hard enough to throw her into the lounge, "That's _not_ acceptable." she snarled, she'd have gone for her gun if a hand on her arm hadn't stopped her. The small touch causing her biotics to ebb and flow away and looking down at it she saw a black gloved _human_ hand. Tracing the slender hand up long it's arm to meet the cobalt eyes of its owner she blinked as it took a second to identify Miranda.

Miranda had _never_ seen anything like what had just happened. The switch in Shepard had no rational explanation. One moment she'd been caught up in the dance of a duel with the Queen of Omega then as soon as she'd been restrained and those blue lips had touched hers there'd been a visible shift in Shepard. It had been compounded by the addition of her own biotics to the mix and for a moment she hadn't even _recognized_ Shepard. But now, right now she watched the redness fade and the golden amber eyes framed in long dark lashes return, amber eyes that were _begging_ to be remembered.

The moment was interrupted by a sharp pain behind her right eye and Miranda pulled back quickly, wincing at its intensity. She quickly retreated back to where Jacob and Massani were levelling their assault rifles at Aria's goons.

Aria burst out laughing, "And there it is, _finally_ a taste of the animal within. Tell me Shepard," she rose and sedately approached, eyes boring into Shepard's, "did that feel as good for you as it did for me?" she purred darkly, reaching out to run her hand up Shepard's arm.

Shepard knocked it back and glared at her, "I'm looking for a couple people. Mordin Solus and Archangel. Know where I can find 'em?" she wasn't about to play this particular game.

Aria just smirked and inclined her head before returning to the lounge and gracefully sinking down into it. There would be other times and now she had a vital clue into how she could reach that beast within Shepard. "Interesting. I like Mordin Solus, he's as likely to shoot you as he is to heal you, runs a clinic in the quarantine zone." her face darkened, "There's a plague killing everyone but humans and vorcha. I've had to lock the whole area down and wait for it to run its course, or for Mordin to find a cure. Just don't bring the plague _back_ with you." she waved her hand dismissively at the human.

"Noted." Shepard nodded, her face a mask that revealed nothing of her true thoughts, of how _ill_ she felt right now or how chaotic her mind still was.

"As for Archangel, you and every other merc here want a piece of him. He's been causing... problems for them. So much so they've teamed up and are hiring freelancers. The recruiting station is downstairs to the right." she gestured, "Now why do you want them exactly? You're not the type to go bounty hunting for fun." she asked curiously then added darkly, "Unless they're _Batarian_ of course."

Shepard ignored the last comment, "I'm putting together team of the best. I'm sure you know Mordin's background isn't entirely medical and pissing off every major merc band on Omega takes a whole lot a stupid and the skills to stay alive as long as he has suggest he'll be useful. Besides stupid and I get along just fine." she shrugged nonchalantly.

"Just make sure you come back when you've found them, privately this time." Aria shot a meaningful glance at Miranda.

Shepard rose to her feet, "Miss Lawson will feel left out, I'll have to decline I'm afraid. Maybe next time." she shook her head and sauntered off, putting her arm around Miranda's shoulders and guiding her enraged form to the stairs.

"You'd better Shepard." Aria growled, though she smiled, she'd crack those walls eventually. Oh she'd find the crack, unleash that delicious beast within her to delve into that magnificent mind and rip out the secrets she held, that her biotics whispered were there.

"What the hell was _that_?" Miranda hissed to her for her ears alone, her head was pounding but the sharpness was receding.

"Disgusting. I need a bath when we get back to the Normandy I feel defiled." Shepard shuddered and released her when it was safe. "I _told_ you she wants in my pants." she muttered trying to deflect what she thought Miranda was truly asking, no smugness in her voice but rather she was uncomfortable with the whole situation. "We should check on Archangel first, sounds like he's in trouble." Shepard led them to where a Blue Suns merc was standing guard. Distraction. That's what she needed. A distraction and something to kill.

Miranda watched her lead the way and shook her head slightly. Now probably wasn't the best time or place to demand an explanation from Shepard, not about Aria but about what had _changed_ in her. She knew there were anomalies in Shepard's neural pathways and the chemical composition of her brain, she'd been extremely careful in keeping them intact based on the last scans from the Normandy only days before it had been destroyed. What no one had been able to figure out was what they actually were and what it meant for Shepard. Then there was the sudden headache in herself... the second in a matter of days that spontaneously generated and dissipated with no logical explanation.


	15. Archangel

_**Sorry for previous typos and such Leene, I thought I had them all. I've gone back and picked up a couple as I've put up new chapters but if there's anything glaring or cringeworthy let me know, I know it's a pain when I'm reading others work to lose the flow of the story in a misspell. I also realize this story's taking quite a few chapters to really get up and going but I felt the need to establish some things first and give Seph the chance to say things Shep missed out on in the game. I'd hoped the speedy updates help with that and now we've hit Omega the pace should increase. **_

_**I would like to point out that this story is going to delve deeply into some of the AU aspects I've started dropping hints on so I hope you'll all stick around for the long haul!**_

_**Also m, I think you're gonna like some of the things I've got coming up in the next few chapters. **__**I don't see Miri as more flawed, she has a block in her mind regarding Persephone and Shepard's been throwing her some curve balls she hasn't anticipated but **__**Miri's a highly intelligent woman who's going to be figuring out some things as some of the cracks in Shepard begin to show... Seph isn't as altogether as you think she is, for example if you recall how she reacted to her scars being removed, one broken hand and a few nice words from the good ol' doc ain't fixing that just yet ;)  
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_**Enjoy and again thanks for reviews!  
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><p>A Batarian in the Blue Suns uniform was droning on about how the man in front of him was a freelancer, wouldn't be considered one of the Suns, Eclipse or Blood Pack, if he died he wasn't getting paid and he sounded bored out of his mind. "Send in the next one." he grunted. He did a double take at the group that came in next, all human, two men who definitely looked like they could hold their own and two drop dead gorgeous woman who were clearly <em>not<em> your average freelancers.

"Well what have we here? Sorry hon, strippers quarters are in that direction." he grinned as the armoured female sauntered up to him.

Shepard looked him over disdainfully, "You'd better get going then, I'm looking for Archangel not some little boy who thinks he's funny." she snapped in annoyance.

He chuckled, she had fire and was armed to the teeth, "You want a piece of that asshole you came to the right place. Five hundred creds apiece, you're freelancers not signing up to the Suns, Eclipse or Blood Pack, you die you don't get paid. Head over to the transport terminal and our guys'll take you to where Archangel's holed up." he sent a message to their driver letting him know he was about to get a bunch of pros.

Shepard just nodded and led the way out aware as always that so many eyes were watching her and blatantly ignoring them all.

The Blue Suns driver had taken one look at the glare of doom coming from the lead brunette, grunted something un-intelligible and drove them very quickly to their destination. He left them to make their way to the compound with a quick, "Talk to Sergeant Cathka." then was taking off.

"You certainly have a way with people Commander." Jacob grunted as the vehicle almost clipped him the driver wanted away so fast.

Massani laughed, "Goddamned right, she ever gives you the look and you'll either be dead in a heartbeat or on your arse even faster."

Shepard shot him a wicked grin, "He speaks from experience."

"Damn straight, didn't even see it coming." he chuckled.

"Alright EDI, any other way we can get to our man? Or are we stuck with the mercs?" she asked, getting to business quickly as she strode through the abandoned street in the direction she could hear gunfire.

"The only access point to where Archangel is situated is a single bridge which is being held by the mercenaries on one side. Archangel appears to be very accurate with a sniper rifle and is holding the mercenaries back." EDI informed the Commander after a quick scan of the area.

"Well then, with the mercs it is. Let's see what damage we can cause without them figuring us out." Shepard smirked and followed her gut and her senses to where Archangel was laying waste to any fool who popped their head out in the open.

First common area they came through was filled with Eclipse mercs, led by a Salarian who was cursing away harshly in his native language to a compatriot Salarian while the others around clearly had no idea what he was saying.

Shepard smirked at his language and continued walking until EDI spoke up.

"I'm detecting heavy mechs in the room to your left, powered down currently." The AI warned.

Shepard's mind began thinking quickly, "Keep an eye out for me will you?" she muttered and activating her omni-tool she quickly hacked the door. She was inside in under a minute surveying the apartment turned storage room. There were quite the number of mechs, human sized LOKI security mechs and one great big badass YMIR like the one from Freedom's Progress.

The trio outside assumed different positions, Jacob and Massani became slack in their demeanours, leaning against the walls facing in opposite directions. Miranda activated her omni-tool and sent Kasumi a message to see if she'd been able to follow them this far. She started at a feminine chuckle from somewhere to her right.

"Puh-lease. Like anyone could lose Shepard, the way she moves just about draws the attention of everyone in sight of her." Kasumi scoffed.

Miranda sighed, "She does doesn't she. So much for keeping a low profile." Once again she'd been caught out by that swagger and it _wasn't_ alcohol related she'd discovered much to her chagrin.

"Honey, this is _Omega_. Low profile screams 'attack me'. You wanna know how many times you've been scoped out since getting here and one look at Shepard has turned them on their tails?" Kasumi had observed how seeing Shepard with Aria had affected Miranda and it was something she was going to pester the woman on later. Actually make that _both_ women!

Shepard emerged and locked the door again, "I've switched the YMIR's F/F-ID system." she murmured.

"Excellent. As soon as they activate it it'll turn on them." Miranda was impressed and she'd done it so quickly.

Shepard held up her wrist flashing her omni-tool, "See, shopping with me _wasn't_ such a waste of time now was it." she smirked, seeing the look in Miranda's eyes.

Miranda rolled her eyes.

Following the sporadic gunfire led them to a large chamber that led out to the bridge where Archangel was taking another shot at a foolish Vorcha that had stuck its head out at the wrong time.

Shepard's eyes narrowed, she _knew_ that armour, the sound of the particular sniper. Closing her eyes for a moment she caressed her biotics into life, pouring energy not out but in to her eyes. Opening them she looked at an entirely changed world. Dark, the outline of shapes barely visible to her but the energy, the aura's of living beings shimmering brightly against the darkness, some brighter than others. Most of those that filled the room were dull gray, their life forces barely affecting the current and of little consequence, but a few stood out, she could feel the four behind her, Miranda the brightest and her silver aura soothing. Ahead, across the bridge was the shimmering blue of a very familiar figure. Reaching out with her right hand she lightly sent a gentle brush against his despairing energy.

The sniper tingled at the familiar sense and stiffened. The only time he'd ever felt that was with Shepard. Hesitating he scoped the other side of the bridge almost frantically. Then she stepped out, there was no mistaking that woman's swagger or those fiery amber eyes. Despair turned to hope.

"Uh Shepard, that's a real bad idea!" Jacob hissed as she strode out into the open without a care in the world.

"Relax." she made a quick gesture not to them but to the _sniper_.

When no shots came her way they followed her out, though they stuck to the walls so the mercs didn't realize Archangel wasn't shooting them.

"Where's Cathka?" Shepard grunted to a rather panicky looking freelancer who couldn't be more than seventeen.

He thumbed over to a gunship and returned his attention to something on his omni-tool.

Shepard strode over quickly to find a Batarian Blue Suns merc doing repairs on the ship, "You Cathka?" she demanded.

"Ah, you must be the group Sulkie mentioned." the Batarian nodded and looked over to them, evidently liking what he saw.

"Sulkie?" Shepard frowned, no idea who that was.

"Driver who brought you over, you lot stand out, Archangel won't know what hit him." he grinned.

"So what's the plan then?" Shepard didn't comment on his observation and gone were the easy going mannerisms she'd been displaying until now.

"You freelancers are going to charge the bridge, cause a distraction for the infiltration team we managed to get across. Keep Archangel busy while they blow the ground out from under 'im." Cathka looked over his diagnostics and grunted.

"That's it?" Shepard was not impressed, "Bullet fodder?"

"Yep. Shouldn't pose you lot much trouble though. Now I've got to fix this damn thing before Tarak needs it." He thumbed the gunship.

There was a shout from towards the bridge calling all the freelancers to move their asses.

Shepard smirked at Cathka, "You're working too hard." was all she said before she rammed the blade of her combat knife up through his jaw and sinking deep into his brain.

He was dead before the blade had slipped from his flesh, the burst of blood that followed was skilfully avoided by Shepard as she pushed the body aside, practically kicking him under the gunship and out of sight.

"If you're about done playing around, time to go Shepard." Massani was already fingering his beloved assault rifle.

With a nod Shepard strode out, blade replaced with her Phalanx pistol.

The freelancers were surging over the barrier, there were a good dozen of them.

"Well ladies and gentlemen let's get this party started." She tapped on her omni-tool and half the freelancers flashed with the failing of their shields. "Have at'em."

With that two assault rifles, a semi-machine pistol and a heavy phalanx pistol roared to life, cutting down the freelances in swathes.

Shepard was sprinting through the falling bodies, her body ablaze with biotics as she charged towards a merc bending down over a bomb preparing to set it off.

The merc was half way across the room before he even realized he'd been thrown, he heard the shot then everything went black before he'd even hit the wall.

Shepard put a bullet between the eyes of a shocked salarian then went about securing the crude explosive device.

When the others joined her they took up defensive positions and waited for her orders.

"Jacob, Lawson cover the bridge from down here. Massani, crack out the sniper you and Archangel will be covering from upstairs." she looked to Miranda once she'd finished with the explosive, "I'll be back down after a quick chat with Vakarian."

Miranda cocked her head slightly in confusion, "Who?"

"Archangel is Garrus Vakarian, he still uses the same sniper the acoustics gave him away." Shepard smirked, her eyes bright at the prospect of seeing the Turian.

"You know who he is from the gun he uses all the way back there?" Jacob gestured where they'd come in dumb shock.

"Acoustics never lie." Shepard smirked, she didn't feel the need to mention one of her more exotic biotic abilities. Then she was off leaving the two Cerberus operatives watching their arses as Eclipse prepared to send over a wave of mechs. Off to the right her enthusiasm curbed slightly at a number of respectfully covered bodies who were clearly not of the attacking mercs. A lot more was going on here than she realized.

Up the stairs a couple mercs were trying to hack the door.

Shepard encouraged them to desist with a shockwave that was far too powerful and blasted through the door.

"Show off." Massani grunted through his grin.

Shepard shrugged and sauntered in, grinning from ear to ear.

Garrus took one more shot with his sniper before standing from his snipers perch and removing his helmet, "Shepard." he greeted her with a nod. It was like seeing a spirit reborn, it had been Shepard that had restored in him his drive for justice, had made him a better man and not just a better Turian. The way she had led them on the Normandy was so different to any commanding officer he'd served with, she wasn't aloof, she was there in the trenches with them, shedding blood right alongside them, giving her life for them. When she led there were no questions, he followed, they all followed.

Shepard smiled and approached him with open arms.

Garrus returned her hug a little uncomfortably at first but when she didn't pull away and when he felt her so _real_ he held her tightly. "Spirits I can't believe it's you." he breathed.

She scoffed softly, "You're not the only one." she pulled back and searched his blue predatory eyes and could see a deep grief had taken root in them, "We'll talk about me later. What the hell did you do to piss off every major merc band in the Terminus?" she smirked up at him.

He chuckled, "It wasn't easy, had to work _really _hard at it."

Shepard smiled then asked more seriously, "No doubt about that. What happened Garrus, how did you let yourself get caught up here like this?" she gestured to the apartment, to the bodies downstairs.

He stiffened and looked away shamefully, "I let my feelings get in the way of my better judgement." he bowed his face, "Look, can we talk about this later? I promise I'll tell you everything and you can tell me what happened to you."

"Deal." Shepard nodded enthusiastically, "I've got Massani with his sniper, Jacob and Miranda are both biotics, Jacobs an ex-soldier and pretty damn handy with that rifle of his and Miranda... goddess just don't fuck with Lawson. Only reason _I'm_ still breathing is she spent two years putting me back together and isn't going to ruin her handiwork just yet." she smirked, hoping to ease his grief just a little.

"I take it you've... pissed her off?" Garrus interpreted with the Turian version of a smirk, his mandibles clicking with mirth.

Shepard chuckled, "I punched her so hard I knocked her out cold then had her sedated, I had the Cerberus logo removed from the hull of the Normandy, ordered her _not_ to wear anything that has their bloody logo on it in public and took her _shopping_."

She said the last thing as though it was more scandalous than the first which made Garrus chuckle, "And I take it this would have resulted in something of a more violent response than you received?"

"Hell yes. I should be dead." Shepard smirked, the mirth shining in her eyes at the thought.

"If you two love birds have finished gas bagging we've got incoming." Massani grunted at them his sniper taking the head off a LOKI.

Shepard rolled her eyes at him and walked over to the balcony, standing dead centre and looking unfussed at the number of mechs Eclipse were sending their way.

Garrus returned to his sniper, his crest flushing a little at the remark but he didn't respond to it, "The bridge has been a life saver, whittling all those idiots into my scope. But it works both ways, we try to cross and they'll slaughter us."

"So what, we just sit and wait? To hell with that!" Massani growled, taking out another mech.

There was a flash that indicated Miranda had instigated an overload that left several of the mechs momentarily frozen for Jacob and Massani and now Garrus to take them down quickly.

"This place has served me well, it'll hold out yet and now with you..." Garrus glanced over at the stone faced Spectre who was glaring at the mercs as though that alone would stop them.

"We thin down their numbers, they'll be pushing hard now, they're committed to this assault. But they won't _all_ come over the bridge. We couldn't detect any other entrances but is there any way they can blow through something behind us?" Shepard was in Commander mode now.

"Yeah. There's an access route we blocked off with three atmospheric containment shutters that can be closed." Garrus answered, taking a shot at a mech's head and watching the thing explode.

"Atmospheric shutters? Aria's gonna have a bitch of a time getting them open again." Shepard smirked, "Alright, I'm taking Lawson, you boys can deal with Eclipse. When they bring out the heavy let it do the work for you." her grin widened, "I fixed its targeting parameters."

Garrus chuckled, "Lucky them."

"So where're these shutters?" Shepard activated her omni-tool and linked communications with Garrus.

"There's a door behind the stairwell you came up, they're through there." Garrus informed her quickly with a gesture from his taloned hand.

"Alright. I'll clear up that mess for you first." Shepard smirked, nodding towards the mechs that were still spilling over the barrier. Lighting up her biotics she strode to the back of the room then turned to face the balcony. Neither Garrus nor Zaeed saw her as she sprinted forward then jumped off the railing.

"_HOLY SHIT!_" Jacob almost dropped his assault rifle as from out of nowhere a biotic _storm_ fell out of the fucking sky and _everything_ on the bridge was blasted out in a massive shockwave that decimated even the heavy defensive barrier at the other end of the bridge.

Miranda had also stared in awe, then she realized her mouth was open and she clamped her jaw shut. The biotic energy of Shepard was so familiar to her on a level she _couldn't_ explain but right now she didn't have time to think it through. Shepard swayed for a moment on her feet, fully exposed on the bridge and clearly needing a moment to recover. With a hiss she sprinted from cover and grabbed Shepard by the back of her armour, dragging her back into cover and dropping the unbalanced woman unceremoniously on the ground, "Bloody reckless Shepard." she snapped.

Shepard sat there for a moment, cooling her biotics, "That... was not exactly how I saw that going." she admitted. "I only meant a shockwave to throw the mechs not... whatever the hell that was." she groaned, her head was starting to pound.

"Yes well need I say don't try that again?" Miranda glanced down at her, she was pale, not a good sign, "Now are you going to get off your arse or just sit there all day?" she snapped.

Shepard chuckled and hauled herself to her feet, "No ma'am. We've got some shutters to close in case these guys are just distracting us from a flank attack. The boys will hold here, you're coming with me Miss Lawson."

Miranda frowned slightly, there was a slightly playful edge to Shepard's tone and she hadn't reacted as she had thought she might at being reprimanded by her. Instead she'd simply laughed it off and was now slinking back into the apartment Archangel was using as his base. Quickly she followed the Commander, the bridge was momentarily clear as the mercs on the other side recovered from Shepard's powerful attack.

Heading through the door behind the stairwell Shepard stopped in her tracks as an explosion rumbled around them.

"_Shepard that wasn't you was it?_" Garrus asked warily.

Shepard rolled her eyes, so many responses coming to mind, "Yes Garrus, of course it was me, I thought I'd blast away the rubble and tell the bastards, 'Mechs are boring, bring it bitches'." she drawled.

Garrus chuckled, "_So you were right_."

"Garrus how often am I wrong?" it was a less hubristic way of saying, 'I'm always right' or 'I know everything about you'.

"_Never while I've known you_." he returned.

Shepard smirked, "Well there's a first time for everything, just not about this." she broke into a jog as she could see the first shutter. Her smile vanished at the sight of Blood Pack Krogan's and Vorcha rambling towards them. "Blood Pack. Looks like Lawson and I get more fun than you do."

"_Want some backup?" _Jacob asked instantly.

"No. Garrus gets a scratch on him and I'm kicking your arses. Besides," she smirked as she hit the shutter release, "I've got Lawson, why the hell would I need backup?" Her sparkling amber eyes alight with mirth. She was determined to jog Miranda's memory without jumping up and down screaming _I AM PERSEPHONE_ and the best ways she figured to do that was number one: piano, number two: merciless teasing. Hey it'd worked when they were kids it could work now right?

Jacob chuckled, "_True that._"

Miranda had no idea how to take this new development. Was Shepard pretending to be nice to gain her trust? Was she flirting with her? Or was there a remote possibility that she was actually sincere? Miranda went to fire at the incoming Vorcha and Krogan but was stopped by Shepard.

"Save your ammo Lawson." Shepard glared at the lead Krogan and hit the shutter release. Ten seconds and a stack load of enemy bullets whipping past them later the shutter slammed shut.

"I'd prefer it if you called me Miranda." Miranda looked to Shepard expectantly though the woman was heading off to the door on the right that would take them to another shutter so she couldn't see the expression on her face.

Taking up position at the door she lit up her eyes biotically and detected half a dozen gray shapes moving through the room on the other side of the door. She looked back at Miranda and bit her lower lip at the platinum silver aura that shone around the woman, it was so beautiful she looked angelic and momentarily Shepard was lost for words.

Miranda was taken by complete surprise at the biotic glow that was focussed in Shepard's eyes turning them from their usual golden amber to violet. "Shepard what are you doing with your eyes?" she asked quickly.

"There's four Vorcha and two Varren behind door number two." she murmured as Miranda took her place.

"You can see biotic aura's?" Miranda whispered back as they prepared to break the door, that was yet _another_ thing that wasn't in her files. She was quickly beginning to think her files were a waste of time.

"Yes." Was all Shepard whispered before she motioned for Miranda to go left. A moment later the door was sliding open and Shepard was sprinting through it with pistol blazing and biotics throwing crates at helpless vorcha.

Miranda was definitely going to be following up on this but took to the left as Shepard blasted to the right clearly making the bigger bang to get the attention of the Blood Pack mercs so she could do more subtle damage.

One of the varren charged at Shepard, until Shepard channelled her anger and snarled at the beast.

The varren suddenly slid on its haunches, whimpered like a kicked puppy and scrambled away much to the shock of the vorcha trailing it. Beast knew beast and the human was clearly an alpha.

Shepard smirked and ended the vorcha's confusion with a bullet through the brain.

The varren hightailed it right back where it came from through the shutter where a krogan was barking at it to get back into the fight.

The krogan cursed the varren and looked to the human female who had strangely glowing eyes and carried only a tiny pistol. He scoffed, "Why don't you try using a _real_ gun human!" he bellowed at her, scoffing at the pathetic little weapon.

"I don't _need_ one to deal with pissy little vorcha's like you." Shepard sneered right back.

He snarled and blood rage at such an insult took over his senses. He roared and charged at her.

Shepard braced, krogan could move real fast over short distances when in blood rage giving them great power when they slammed into their victims. In this case it would prove to be his undoing. She set her shoulders forward and charged, closing the distance between them with biotic speed, her right arm drawn back and enveloped in violet blue, pulsing energy.

Miranda's eye widened and she didn't even have time to curse as Shepard literally threw herself at a charging krogan. The bone shattering crash as the two opposing forces clashed in the centre of the small warehouse like chamber just about shook the room. Blood, bone and brain matter spraying in a wide arc as the Krogan's skull was _pulverized_ by Shepards fist. It's body slamming to the ground several meters _back_ from the point of collision.

Everything else in the room just _stopped_.

Three vorcha that remained pissed themselves in terror.

The other krogan that had been approaching the shutter from the other side stared in shock as his krogan comrade thudded to a stop, all that was left of his head was a mangled depression in his hump.

Shepard looked down at the body and smirked, "Guess Freedom's Progress was really just a love tap huh Miss Lawson?"

Miranda snapped her gaping jaw shut and opened fire on the nearest staring vorcha. She definitely did _not_ want to be on the receiving end of another of Shepard's strikes.

Shepard threw the other krogan back with a shockwave and left Miranda to deal with the vorcha while she activated the shutter release.

Miranda approached Shepard, "How's the hand?" she asked casually, hiding her concern behind her usual cool mask.

Shepard looked at it and made a fist, "I cushioned it with a field, my hand never actually connected with him." she admitted.

"I thought I asked you to call me Miranda." she nodded in acknowledgement of the response.

Shepard flushed, "I... As you wish, Miranda." she murmured, bowing her head politely she turned and quickly jogged out to find the last shutter.

Had Miranda been able to see those amber eyes she would have, in that moment, seen the heart and soul of her beloved Persephone. But Shepard had not looked her in the eye and had turned as soon as she'd finished speaking.

The last shutter had been much easier to reach as only a couple brainless Vorcha had made their way through it and after Garrus warned them that things were heating up upstairs they returned at a sprint. They arrived in time to see two rather larger krogan's lumber up the stairs in the apartment and another half dozen vorcha and a couple varren charging towards them.

Shepard took care of the varren channelling her anger again and snarling at them.

Miranda shook her head in wonder as the beasts hightailed it out of there in fear while causing confusion with the vorcha trying to get them under control again and leaving themselves open for the two sharp shooters.

"That was a little unorthodox." She glanced at Shepard with an actual smirk.

Shepard grinned like she'd been praised by her idol, "What can I say, you bring out the beast in me Miranda." she winked and sprinted up the stairs.

Miranda hesitated. What in the stars did that mean?

"Lawson!" Jacob called from the main entrance, relieved to see them having just finished dealing with the Eclipse mercs.

"Keep watching the bridge." Miranda ordered him and followed after Shepard who was now punching the face in of another krogan. She shook her head, Shepard was enjoying that far too much.

Garrus and Massani were pinned down by the Krogan Battlemaster who wasn't aware of the threat behind him until she spoke.

"Hey Tiny, who the fuck taught you to shoot? A vorcha? Hell did you even pass your Rite? Bet you pissed your shell when the Klixon flew in." Shepard taunted, Wrex had taught her a lot about the Krogan when he realized not only was she interested but she had the heart of a Krogan Battlemaster.

Until then the Battlemaster had been calculating and composed. Now he saw black and charged her with a fear inspiring roar...

And Shepard just laughed, dancing out of the way to a place she could get a better run up. "That the best you got Tiny? A pyjak's got more quad then you."

"Shepard what the _fuck_ are you doing!" Massani hissed at her. Everyone in the galaxy knew not to piss off a krogan in bloodrage.

The krogan surged towards her, weapons forgotten, his own roar filling his ears.

Shepard biotically charged him and drew back her right arm.

Miranda knew what was coming but the two men watching on didn't as Garrus surged to his feet as though he could somehow stop her.

The room shook at their collision.

Then again as the krogan's body slammed into the wall with such force he was embedded in it, his face literally coming out his hump.

_Now_ Shepard looked at her fist in detest. That particular krogan had had a biotic shielding in place. Meaning her hand was quite broken, though nowhere near in the same magnitude as the krogan's face.

All three spectators were staring at the krogan body in the wall in awe.

"Holy fucking shit." Massani drawled, eyes boggling at the sight and an all new appreciation for the slip little Shepard billowing.

Miranda was the first to recover as she turned her gaze back to Shepard who was trying to remove her glove. Striding over she gently took over, "Well at least I know the enhancements are working."

Shepard chuckled and let Miranda do her thing, "You do good work."

Miranda glanced up at her, sensing sincerity in her voice, "Nothing but the best."

Shepard winced as she straightened out her bones before applying medi-gel.

Garrus moved up beside them shaking his head, "You did _that_ and all you got was a broken fist? Spirits Shepard!" his mandibles clicked.

Shepard glanced at him, "Yeah, had a bit of an upgrade." she smirked.

Miranda scoffed but said nothing.

Shepard tapped beside her eye, "These babies go red and I suggest you run away very fast. Unless you're Miss Lawson and enjoy being knocked out co- ahh!" she bit back a yelp as Miranda pressed on one of her broken bones.

"Sorry what was that Commander?" she purred innocently.

Shepard laughed and tapped her lightly under the chin in an old affectionate gesture, "You'll keep Miranda."

Miranda looked up at her, feeling a little invaded at the intimate touch but upon seeing those fiery amber eyes something seemed to take hold of her and words failed her. Her heart actually skipped a beat and the heat from Shepard's proximity seemed to burn through her suit.

"Hate to interrupt, truly, but we got Blue Suns moving in." Massani called over to them sharply as a window to their right smashed.

Miranda scowled at him and felt her cheeks betray her and flush.

"Well you don't need _my_ permission to shoot their arses. Found Vido yet?" Shepard pretended not to notice Miranda's blush and hoped it was a good sign.

"Yeah, gotta talk about that later so don't fucking choke on a bullet on me now girl." He grouched in his usual tough mercenary manner.

Miranda was wrapping up the bandage and wondering how the hell Shepard of all people could get on so well with a no-morals ruthless merc.

"Ha! You found the backstabbing bastard and want my help to keep his blood thirsty minions at bay while you put few rounds in him." she scoffed, still playfully as the men turned to the window to where the mercs were crashing in from the gunship.

Both Miranda and Shepard had their biotic shields up so weren't overly concerned about any incoming fire just yet but neither were planning on just standing out in the open for long. They both ducked behind a large planter, crouching side by side.

"Thanks Miranda." Shepard murmured to her as she pulled on her armoured glove.

"Try not to damage it further Commander, you have expensive hands." Miranda grumbled to her, though in a surprisingly calm manner rather than the usual cool business or annoyed or pissed of tones Shepard had come to hear from her more often than not.

"Well you _do_ want me to put my upgrades to good use don't you?" Shepard grinned, popping up to fire at the already hampered mercs firing with her left hand with just as much accuracy as her right which she kept weapon free.

"I'm certain that good use does not including smashing your fist into the faces of charging krogan." Miranda countered, rising up as soon as Shepard ducked back down to reload.

Shepard grinned up at her, in this position she was so incredibly sexy as her catsuit hugged her figure tightly at her movements. "You know I'm having second thoughts about that suit of yours Miranda." she was up and firing quickly.

"Oh?" Miranda ducked down to reload.

"It's bloody _distracting_." Shepard whined playfully as though they weren't in a fight for their lives.

"_Commander we've got Suns coming in from below._" Jacob reported.

"Massani get your sniper over the stairs, we'll cover up here." Shepard ordered quickly.

"Roger that." he quickly moved out as ordered.

Miranda took over their firing position as Shepard ducked down to reload, "And just what about my uniform do you find so distracting Commander?" she continued their conversation, a part of her mind wondering what she was thinking if she was thinking at all.

"You want a list or the abbreviated version?" Shepard was grinning from ear to ear, so far so good.

What the hell why not. "You have a list?"

"How about starting off with those killer sexy boots, if I thought I could pull them off like you can I'd so want a pair." Shepard glanced at the knee high black heels that so did not look battle worthy yet Miranda fought in them flawlessly.

"Good thing you can't, I'm not in the habit of sharing my wardrobe." Miranda returned, she had an idea of what to expect from Shepard as many a man, woman and asari had made the mistake of flirting with her about her looks.

"Ha like I'd fit in them anyway, besides I'd just break my ankles running in those things." She probably could but Miranda was taller, bustier and had a much more nicely rounded arse than she did. "Which brings me to number two. How the fuck do you move in that thing? It's so tight I'm finding it hard to breath in sympathy for you."

Miranda had ducked down to reload and was startled by that one, glancing up at Shepard who was smirking as she shot down a batarian. "It's actually quite comfortable and allows me a greater range of movement than armour."

Their banter was interrupted by Kasumi who'd been wreaking havoc behind enemy lines with her sneaky, sneaky ways.

"_That gunship is warming up its rockets!_"

The gunship appearing in the balcony window to their left as soon as she'd finished speaking.

"Take cover!" Shepard yelled over to Garrus who was completely exposed where he was.

"_ARCHANGEL YOU THINK YOU CAN SCREW WITH THE BLUE SUNS!_" a very pissed off male voice bellowed right before he fired two rockets into the small space.

Shepard and Miranda were protected by their cover and biotic shields.

Garrus was not so fortunate as even with the warning he'd hesitated at seeing his end coming towards him.

"Garrus!" Shepard called out in fear as she saw one of her best friends tossed like a doll. Quickly she lashed out with her broken right hand and surrounded him with a biotic shield before he crashed into the wall.

"Damnit." Miranda hissed as their cover was pelted with chunks of debris from furniture and the floor.

"Singularity/Warp." Shepard snapped, all playfulness and teasing gone.

"Got it." Miranda nodded and prepared for it.

Shepard gently nudged Garrus behind cover with her biotics as the gunships machine guns roared to life intent on finishing the job on them all. With him in cover she took a deep breath and channelled the rage she felt at the mere thought of losing Garrus this close to him.

The singularity was so powerful it just about encompassed the gunship.

"Shepard that's really going to cause a big bang." Miranda warned her.

"That's the _point_." Shepard growled.

"Jacob take cover inside the apartment _now,_ Kasumi wherever the hell you are get your head down." Miranda advised her fellow operatives.

"_Taking cover._" he moved quickly.

Counting a few more seconds Miranda let loose a warp and ensured her shields were as strong as she could manage.

The explosion ripped the ship apart just like it had the mech, only the gunship was far larger and the force of the explosion blew out most of the balcony.

The shockwaves threw Miranda into Shepard who put her arm around the operatives torso and held her close with one arm while she gripped the solid built in planter with her broken hand and kept her position. Anything that wasn't tied down was either pulverized, thrown into walls or into the centre of the apartment crashing downstairs.

Massani swore, diving for cover as even where _he_ was wasn't safe.

It took a moment for Miranda's senses to return and she found herself in the strong, safe embrace of Shepard.

"We are quite the bringers of destruction, wouldn't you say?" Shepard smirked, waiting for Miranda to recover and enjoying the moment of closeness.

Miranda quickly pulled away, her heart racing for a different reason, "Indeed." was all she said.

Seeing that she was okay Shepard left what remained of their cover and sprinted over to Garrus, "Joker get Chakwas ready, Garrus has been hit real bad, tried to catch a rocket with his face." she contacted the pilot.

"_Huh you been rubbing off on him Commander, that's so something you would do!_" Came the playful but slightly concerned response. When Shepard didn't respond he knew it was bad and quickly passed on the message to the doctor.


	16. Clawing at the Surface

_**You are right Sarah-Andr3ws in thinking I've written more and am posting bit by bit. I have in no way finished the story granted but going back over and reading it before posting I'm finding inconsistencies that I'm correcting as I post, links I missed and clues that needed to be made clearer and such hence only a couple chapters a day are going up. I'm glad you're finding my story interesting. Everyone has their different takes on the characters in Mass Effect and this is merely one of mine, sure there will be people who don't like it but hey, I'm sharing my Shepard and she's had a very different beginning to life. She told Miri in ch 2 that her childhood has a far greater impact on things to come but not even Seph realizes just how much yet.**_

_**Nightbrainzz, Zorya will be interesting indeed. Seph and Massani go way back with some of her black ops missions but as you're about to find out in this chapter Seph has a very strong... opinion towards people who murder the innocent. Deciding which way she'll go on Zorya will be quite the quandry for her.  
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_**Fair warning. This chapter has some darker aspects to it.  
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><p>Shepard had seen Garrus delivered to Chakwas alive at least and stood for a few moments at the window watching as the good doctor fought to keep him alive. She was torn. She wanted to stay there and wait to find out how he was going, to be there if he didn't make it. But even she knew whatever needed to be done was going to take hours. Hours they didn't have.<p>

"Miranda, Jacob, Kasumi and Massani regear and meet at the airlock ASAP. We've got someone else to pick up." Shepard hadn't realized that Miranda was right behind her.

"Commander your hand..." Miranda began.

"Is good enough for biotics and I can shoot left handed. I'll refrain from further right hooks." She managed a small smile, "I'll leave that up to Massani should it be required."

"You're not going to wait?" Miranda knew better than to argue and nodded towards the window.

"It'll take hours. Hours I'd be pacing getting more and more worried. This way I can distract myself and get done what needs to be done." she held up her left hand and crossed her fingers, "Fingers crossed we'll be back before he's even awake."

Shepard and Miranda were pinned down by a squad of Blue Suns who were hunting down every single human in the district and killing them simply for being human and not being affected by the virus. The common consensus among the non-humans were that it was a human weaponized disease trial and were taking it out on the humans with a vengeance.

"What was it you were saying about getting back to the Normandy before Garrus wakes up?" Miranda called over to Shepard.

"Did you cross your fingers Miranda?" Shepard shot back, smirking at the fact Miranda had just made what sounded like a _joke_.

Miranda's expression answered the question, 'why the hell would I do that?'

"So this is all your fault." Shepard continued, waiting for a pause in the oncoming fire while Jacob and Massani worked their way around to catch the mercs by surprise while they were concentrating on the two women.

"_My_ fault! How do you figure that!" Miranda growled in annoyance.

"Clearly you didn't cross your fingers." Shepard was grinning from ear to ear and lightly poked Miranda's shoulder.

"Childish." Miranda muttered, but she was smiling.

"I like to think of it as more distracting my mind from darker thoughts. For example, why I don't want to be on the ship right now." The smile waivered and the moment the gunfire was paused she was up and sending what would be a gut wrenching shockwave through the enemy lines, scattering them and making them easy pickings for her elite team, especially Jacob and Massani who now had the high ground and were starting to pick them off like ducks.

Miranda felt a little bad about calling her childish in that moment, the levity had been started by her own comment after all, but then Shepard had obviously appreciated it.

With this batch of Blue Suns down Massani, Jacob and Kasumi kept watch as Shepard searched the locked apartments for survivors or humans that had been trapped in their own homes. Most were empty, some had dead bodies of various races who'd died of the plague or starvation from being locked inside by the Suns. The mercs in their fear had tried to stop the spread of the disease by limiting the movement of people meaning dozens had been locked in their own rooms, solitary, alone in their final moments and many not even sick. Finding the bodies of children was the hardest but even more sickening were the human children who'd been slaughtered just for being human.

Shepard's eyes were red with rage. "Miss Lawson, the Blue Suns and Blood Pack are officially on my shit list." she growled, her husky voice low, tightly controlled and colder than ice, so cold in fact that Miranda shivered.

"Normally I would point out that Mordin Solus is our mission," Miranda began and flinched as Shepard's face snapped towards her, "however, given the circumstances. I agree with your assessment, they must be stopped."

Shepard didn't have it in her to smirk at the quick change of heart. Instead she nodded and continued moving through the apartments.

No one really commented when Shepard blitzed through the mercs damn near ripping them limb from limb with her biotics. She didn't yell. She didn't threaten. She didn't curse. She didn't speak. She _snarled_ at them. She was death itself and even the vorcha knew it. It was all the others could do to fall in with her style as even in her rage she communicated with them through sharp hand gestures, guiding the team through the hostile terrain like commandoes. She expected them to keep up or she'd leave them behind. She was not just an N7, not just a powerful biotic, she was something _else._

That wildness within her had surfaced through the broken and mutilated bodies of children butchered like animals. The beast Aria had been so invested in unleashing was lashing out though not entirely out of Shepard's tight control as she in turn butchered the mercs with the predatory instincts of a hunting animal.

It was fucking impressive even for Massani who usually spent just as much time watching her arse as killing enemies. He'd been just about giddy with delight at the sight of Shepard _and_ Lawson. Right now however, this was the reason she was both respected and _feared_. The infamous shit list. Anyone on it died. Painfully. As these mercs were finding out as she ripped them limb from limb.

It was this wildness that had gotten Shepard through Akuze, through Elysium and her team through the Batarian's on Torfan. She'd been called the Butcher _not_ because she'd lost her unit, though a few of the greenhorns had been left behind by her, but because of how she'd carved her way through the Batarian Slavers regardless of whether they'd surrendered or not. Every Batarian knew Shepard's name. They knew it and along with it knew that should ever they come in contact with her to run in the other direction as quickly as possible.

Shepard was _butchering_ her way through the mercs. Blue Suns, Blood Pack, vorcha, all fell before her fury, before the beast they'd brought to the surface and her elite team.

Many would look upon Shepard as a hero, a paragon of humanity... until someone fucked with innocent people, _especially_ kids. Would those same people look upon her now they would turn and flee in terror.

Massani had already seen her like this before.

Miranda had been prepared for it given her research.

Jacob and Kasumi, however, had never dreamed she could be like this.

Kasumi shuddered as a shockwave threw a Batarian merc into a wall so hard he wasn't just embedded he was crushed like a watermelon, orange blood spurting from joints in his armour with a sickeningly wet crunch.

Shepard had already turned her attention to another unfortunate merc, a Turian this time who shortly found himself impaled on debris. If her hand hadn't been broken she'd have been up close and personal with the hostiles who were no longer sentient beings in her minds eye. No, these Blue Sun and Blood Pack coloured beings were cowardly pack animals that preyed on the weak and those who couldn't defend themselves. If she'd been able to she'd be sinking her fists into their stinking corpses and ripping them apart. It was probably a good thing her hand was broken and her mind subconsciously registered that fact as she attacked driven by highly trained instincts honed through the blood and fires of a thousand battles... of which _Shepard_ herself would never be aware of.

Outside the doctors clinic Shepard came to a halt. She had to restrain herself, to force the wildness back into its cage but she knew she needed a little help. Ordinarily she would have locked herself away and lost herself in her music to soothe the savage beast but right now there was no time for that. "So Miranda I didn't get to finish my list."

Miranda thought quickly in regards to what list she was talking about then frowned slightly, "Oh please, do continue." she rolled her eyes, her tone dripping with sarcasm.

Shepard glanced to her, "White? I mean really, white?"

"What's so _distracting_ about white?" Miranda crossed her arms and glared at her, though she sensed there was more to this conversation than what first met the eye.

"How are you supposed to sneak around the battlefield in a colour that screams 'look at me'? It's like you're wearing a beacon to attract enemy attention." Shepard gave a little smile, not looking away from Miranda's searching gaze.

Miranda could hear something in her voice, could see the pleading in her reddened eyes and she realized what Shepard was doing. She shifted her posture to become seductive and smirked, "Well _someone's_ got to try and draw their attention off your expensive arse. I mean you just go flying in with a dozen guns pointed at you and you really think your shields are the only thing keeping you alive? Please, this _distracting_ white suit is the only reason you're not filled with bullet holes." she gestured offhandedly to Shepard, her tone slightly mocking.

Shepard's smile widened and the red in her eyes faded a little.

"Surely you've got more than _that_ on your list. Come on then, hit me with it, what _else_ do you find so distracting about me?" she gestured a 'come on' with the flick of her wrist.

"The belt." Shepard looked down at Miranda's hips.

"What not her boobs or arse? Shepard I thought you were more fucking observant than that." Massani suddenly interjected.

"Massani you have no imagination... wait... I take that back you have a _one tracked_ imagination." Shepard put her hand on her hip, "This isn't about Miranda's gorgeous physique, she's most likely heard how sexy her arse is from every drooling fool like you and probably finds such observations offensive, tiresome or just bloody boring. This is about why I find her _clothes_ distracting you arse." she punched him in the shoulder with her left hand. The red fading from her eyes even further.

"What, you think I don't know what you're up to? You're dissing her clothes to get her outta them and in your pants." Massani scoffed back at her, he knew this drill, the light hearted banter that dragged her mental processing out of her savage instincts.

Shepard gasped in mock shock, "You filthy old pervert! _That's_ why you kept bagging my armour! Oh I'm so on to your wiley ways now old boy!" she waggled her finger at him and grinned. "Get your wrinkly old arse over there and keep watch for mercs who might've taken cover or something." she pointed to a good scouting position.

Massani rolled his eyes and strode away, grinning as he did.

"Jacob, Kasumi make sure the clinic's secure, Miranda and I'll deal with Mordin." she instructed them with a smile.

The duo moved inside, Kasumi looking up at Shepard from under her hood a touch warily.

Shepard turned back to Miranda, "Thank you." she lowered her gaze, not looking at Miranda but rather the ground shyly.

Miranda nodded, "Anytime Commander." she smiled, "Even should you wish to comment on my other assets." she winked.

"I may need a little humour to keep the inner beast at bay, but I would never..." she huffed, "What could I possibly say to make light of your... assets. You're gorgeous, you know it end of discussion." she turned quickly, a little too quickly but not fast enough to hide her blush.

"Are you blushing Commander?" Miranda sauntered behind her confidently.

Shepard sighed and looked up as though searching the heavens with a 'why me' moment, "Yes."

The simple honesty surprised Miranda and she chuckled, "And why would you be blushing over me Commander? Unless of course there are other assets you need to list as distracting." she murmured over Shepard's shoulder now.

"Fine, fine, turnabout's fair play." Shepard braced to suck it up after all she _had_ been teasing Miranda about her attire, "Just so long as no weapons are involved... wait, you've got some pretty damn impressive weapons right there I surrender already."

"And what weapons could you possibly be referring to?" Miranda practically purred, she'd had her 'assets' referred to as weapons before, it wasn't anything new to her.

"Your superior wit and intelligence of course, what _else_ could I possibly be referring to?" Shepard returned as they made their way through the overcrowded clinic. There were no mercs within these walls but plenty of humans and other races who were reasonable enough to not blame the humans for the plague.

"What indeed." Miranda smirked, finding herself both fascinated and pleased with Shepard.

They found Mordin Solus in a back room finishing up with a patient.

"Professor Solus?" Shepard greeted the Salarian in a friendly manner.

Mordin glanced at them, "Not refugees. No scanning equipment, not here for plague. Too well armed. Soldiers, not scientists."

Shepard smiled and held up her hands in a gesture of faith, "Relax professor, we're here to see you. I'm Commander Shepard, I'm on a critical mission and I need your help."

"Mission, what mission? Wait no time for mission. Must cure the plague first. Cure already made just need to get in the ventilation system." Mordin shook his head and turned back to his work.

Shepard thought quickly, "How about this. My team and I get your cure in the system then you accompany me on my mission. Human colonies are being targeted by Collectors all across the Terminus, hundreds of thousands of men, women and children just taken from their homes. All security systems bypassed and not a shot fired. I'm going to get them back and I need your help to do it."

Mordin considered it. "Hmm interesting. Collectors one of few groups who could engineer plague as this. Could be connected. Yes, yes you insert cure, I'll join your mission." Mordin walked over to his work station and began quickly rummaging, putting together an appropriate kit of plague treatments as well as the aerosolized version for the ventilation system.

Shepard and Miranda paid close attention to his clipped instructions. Both were able to follow his hamster on souped up coffee Salarian voice as he raced through it all. Miranda noticed that Shepard didn't use her translator VI and recalled she could fluently speak Salarian as well as a number of other languages. For all Shepard's downplaying of her own intelligence she was a remarkably smart woman, not in Miranda's league of course but definitely far closer than the average citizen.

As they were about to leave the Professor there was a loud clanking sound and the district became awash with red warning lights.

"What the hell is that?" Miranda frowned, a very bad feeling in her gut.

"Environmental controls down. Must restore them or whole district will suffocate." Mordin informed them in no uncertain terms.

"Consider it done." Shepard nodded, "EDI what's the fastest route to the environment controls from here?" she asked the AI.

"_Without having information on hostile activity or damage to the district I calculate this is the most direct and quickest route for you to take._" EDI responded, sending it to Shepard's omni-tool.

"Thank you EDI, you're a gem." Shepard smiled and with pack over her shoulder she led Miranda out of Mordin's back room.

"_I am not sure I understand what you mean._" EDI returned, almost hesitantly.

"It means I value your opinion and the insights you share." Shepard answered with ease and sincerity.

There was a momentary pause, "_Thank you Commander, I believe you are a gem as well." _came the soft, _genuine _response.

Shepard grinned, "Thanks EDI. Now how about you give Joker a little spin in his chair and tell him from me to stop watching asari porn and check on Garrus."

"_But he is not watching... ah, I understand, I will relay the message._" EDI's tone was clearly amused.

"Ground team fall in, we've got to get the environmental systems back online." Shepard ordered softly so as not to alarm the sick or those seeking refuge in the crowded clinic.

"_Goddamn your voice's so sexy even when giving orders._" Massani chuckled.

"Can it Massani." Shepard growled and rolled her eye at his chuckle.

"Excuse me." A little voice piped up in front of her belonging to a small human child she'd almost bumped in to. A little girl to be precise.

"Ellie!" A frantic mother hissed, terrified her little girl would piss off the heavily armed mercs.

Shepard looked down to the girl and smiled.

The girl beamed and was emboldened, "You're Commander Shepard aren't you."

Her voice suddenly seemed to carry as everyone in the clinic went silent and stared.

Miranda was instantly on edge, hand hovering by her weapon.

Shepard nodded to the girl, "Yes I am, your name's Ellie right?"

Ellie's jaw dropped and her eyes widened, "How do you know _my_ name?"

Shepard chuckled, "I think your mum might be a little worried for you. It's not usually a good idea to talk to strangers."

"But you're not a stranger, you're the first human Spectre!" Ellie countered.

"Who happens to be very busy right now." Miranda growled, she received a pout and a bemused smirk.

"My pretty but grumpy friend is right. I've got to get the environmental systems back up and running and get Dr. Mordin's cure in to get rid of the plague." Shepard smirked, she could feel the glare from Miranda on her back.

"Is it true what they're all saying? Did humans _really_ make the plague?" Ellie asked softly and _everyone_ was listening.

"No. Humans did _not_ make the plague but for some reason whoever made it purposefully didn't want it to kill humans. Whether that's because they..." Shepard stilled as a dark thought dawned, she turned to Miranda, "Could it be possible the seeker swarms only work on humans?"

Miranda's brow furrowed a little, "Possible but more than likely given their technology..." she thought about it some more before finishing the sentence, "We don't know enough about the swarms to make any valid judgement on what they can or cannot do. But I can see the logic in what you're suggesting, eradicate the non-humans to make it easier to abduct the humans."

Shepard clenched her jaw and fists, "Bloody bastards, what the f... hell do they want with our species?" she quickly remembered the kid and censored herself.

Ellie was baffled as the two most beautiful women she'd ever seen talked to each other suddenly and momentarily forgetting she was there.

"_Shep we've got Blood Pack incoming._" Kasumi's voice cut in suddenly.

Shepard's demeanour darkened immediately, "They still haven't got the message that they're on my shit list have they." she growled, her biotics flaring, causing those around them to gasp and pull back. "Ellie, go sit with your mother it looks like she needs an Ellie shaped hug." she lightly patted the girl on the head as she strode passed her.

Ellie giggled and bounded over to her mother who did indeed look like she needed a hug. Not long after Shepard and her friend left muffled gunfire and explosions could be heard.

* * *

><p><em><strong>I'm not going to say overly much about the beast in Shepard just yet as you'll find out more about it as the story progresses.<br>**_

_**I'm very interested in your thoughts on this one! Oh and you'll get the other half of Mordin's recruitment mission by tonight (Aussie time that is).  
><strong>_


	17. Unexpected

_**I noticed ch 12 'You did WHAT!'** **hasn't** **been getting as many readers. Was it posting more than one chapter at a time that's caused people to skip it I wonder? If you haven't I recommend it, has some of the first positive developments between Seph and Miri in it.  
><strong>_

_**Posting earlier than anticipated, only early afternoon! I might even get the chance to post a third one or one for my DA story... Joys of holidays!**_

* * *

Shepard wasted no time searching apartments and inflicting the memories of more dead or murdered civilians into her already brimming mind. Instead she maintained her biotic vision, if there wasn't anything alive there was no point going in. It was her biotic vision that caught the blurred movement of around a half dozen beings in an apartment to their left.

The squad fell in behind Shepard as she motioned for them to take up entry positions. Jacob and Massani were either side of the door to burst into the room and take the occupants by surprise when ordered.

Shepard's eyes narrowed. She could clearly see the majority of the occupants were Batarian's but there was also a _human_ male in there. "Four Batarians, one human. Probably a hostage so I'll go in first and secure him, soon as I take down the one holding the human Miranda take the one on the right, Jacob closest on the left, Massani outside on the left. Kasumi keep an eye out here." she quietly dished out her orders. There was no way she was taking chances, _especially_ with _Batarians._

Upon opening the door and striding into the apartment with her shields up and weapon at the ready it became apparent that things were indeed looking badly for the young human man. He was pleading for his life insisting that he was trying to _help_ the Batarian's that he had the _cure_. The Batarian's weren't having a bar of it. Unfortunate for them.

Before the leader of the Batarian's could even turn to threaten her Shepard held out her right hand and sent a tightly focussed biotic pull, ripping the weapon from his hand. With her left hand she shot him in the center of his four eyes.

That shot had barely even finished ringing in the ears of the would be saviour of the Batarians when three more weapons fired and all four Batarians ended up dead on the ground. A clinical, clean takedown if Shepard ever saw one, which had her smirking with pride and _great_ satisfaction. That little bubble burst as the man they'd saved finally registered what had happened.

"You _killed _them!" he exclaimed not in joy at all but rather horror as he looked down at the bodies appalled.

Massani snorted at him.

"Yeah, bad habit of mine I admit." Shepard scowled at him and put her hand on her hip, "I mean we've just fought our way through a district where scum like that have been having a real good time massacring humans just cos they're human. Then here you are with a bunch of _Batarian's_," she spat the name out in disgust, "holding you at gun point threatening to kill _you_. Of _course_ I should have knocked and asked politely for them to let you go. Wouldn't you agree?" she glanced at Miranda who was standing beside her with a look of contempt on her face.

"No." Miranda asserted firmly.

Shepard looked back to the man impatiently, "Clearly you haven't seen how many little kids these filth have gutted." she scoffed at him then shook her head, "You're one of Mordin's staff then, to have a cure right?"

The man glared at her, "You know not _every_ alien has it out for us humans and I _have_ seen a lot of victims from the mercs. But if these Batarian's were like those mercs don't you think they would have killed me on sight!" he yelled at her angrily.

Shepard sighed, he had a minor point with that one.

"I could have convinced them if you'd given me time! You could have _helped_ them!" he gestured to the bodies.

At that Shepard stiffened, "I will _never_ help a Batarian who holds a human at gun point." she growled in response. "Get back to the clinic kid, Mordin needs all the help he can get and we're getting the cure in the ventilation system so you don't have to worry about giving out _shots_." she thumbed over her shoulder then turned and stormed out.

"What you did was _wrong!_" he called out after the departing human mercs, feeling sick to the stomach at what they'd done, what _she'd_ done.

Shepard scoffed, "Anyone else find that particularly screwed up?"

"Little turd, should've left him to the Batarian's, done him a favour." Massani grunted in agreement.

Shepard's scowl deepened, "He can hate me all he wants, but I'll _never_ leave another human to the Batarian's when I can do something about it." she growled back at him.

He merely shrugged and made no further comment.

"You really don't like Batarian's do you." Kasumi observed with a wry smile.

"Should you ever have the pleasure of seeing them rip open the skulls of your friends to shove control chips in them and raping every female in sight including your own mother I'm sure you'd _like _them just as much as I do." Shepard drawled, keeping her glare straight ahead and not looking at the generally perky woman behind her.

"Ah noted, can't say I'd like them much either." Kasumi cringed and vanished from sight as she stealthed away from them.

Miranda felt no need to add that she believed Shepard had made the right call considering their circumstances, those Batarian's were _not_ being talked down by Mordin's assistant and he _would_ have ended up dead. Wordlessly she followed the Commander, who was a lot calmer compared to earlier even with this little upset.

Shepard was sick of vorcha by the time they reached the environmental system controls.

"You no come here!" A vorcha who was a little bigger than the others which suggested he was an Alpha and the one in charge yelled at them.

"Too late for that." Shepard snarled at him.

"Collectors want plague. Collectors want fan break. Collectors free vorcha, give lots of credits." The vorcha yelled at the intruders.

"The _vorcha_ planted the plague?" Jacob muttered, shaking his head and a little wide eyed at that particular revelation.

"Vorcha will die." Shepard returned coldly, squeezing the trigger and watching for only a fleeting moment as the vorcha's head snapped back with blood and brain matter exploding from it.

The fight was a short lived one as the five humans blitzed their way through the shoddily armed and weak pack animals.

"_The controls for the environmental system are in the back of the room._" EDI reported in.

"Thanks EDI." Shepard handed the pack over to Miranda, "You get the system online and insert the cure, I'll get the fans up and running." she ordered quickly.

Miranda accepted the pack and nodded.

"Jacob you're covering Miranda, Massani and Kasumi on me." Shepard knew it would be just plain stupid having Massani cover Miranda, he'd be too busy watching her arse and quickly led her team to the left passage.

Miranda analysed the system before her and had it prepped for the fans in short order. "Cure's in and the system is online Shepard." she reported once the gunfire to the left had died down.

"_Copy that_." Shepard acknowledged, "_Fan one coming online now._"

Sure enough the clanking of heavy machinery beginning to slowly turn over filled the area and a strong breeze began to flow around them.

"We've got incoming." Jacob warned suddenly, opening fire at a Krogan that lumbered up from the right passage which was to Jacob's left now.

The krogan didn't get very far as both Jacob and Miranda held it back, Miranda had already taken out its shields and Jacob was pounding its armour when Shepard's team burst out from the passage. With the additional three humans the small number of vorcha that had been following the krogan were cut down quickly. Shepard didn't bother engaging the krogan as between Miranda and Jacob it was riddled with bullets in minutes.

Movement on the upper level caught Shepard's eye, a puff of smoke indicative of a rocket launcher... in Miranda's direction and though she was in cover from the front of the room she was completely exposed to the sides.

Miranda felt a powerful biotic field encompass her and frowned momentarily before she was struck on the side with explosive force. The field absorbed most of it but the heat of it still stung her face. A second rocket struck her and a strong hand picked her up from where she'd been thrown by the blow.

Shepard sat her against the divider and held her steady as Miranda got her bearings, "How many?" she asked, holding a finger up in front of Miranda's eyes.

"One." Miranda grunted, not impressed with either herself at having being caught out or with Shepard shoving her hand in her face.

"Good, up'n at'em then." Shepard lightly clapped Miranda on the shoulder with a nod of encouragement that she wasn't going to coddle the woman.

Miranda returned the nod, minutely grateful that Shepard had moved on quickly and after a moment more she got back into the fight. The vorcha truly regretting their lapse in judgement at targeting the woman who furiously extracted her punishment from them just as ferociously as the other human female.

Massani was picking off the vorcha from the upper level with his sniper leaving the others spewing from the right passage for the rest of the team to deal with.

Kasumi was a wraith, her stealth field making her invisible to the enemy making it so easy to sneak up on them and thrust her blade up through their jaws into their brains permanently ending their pathetic existence. She had to be careful though that her team mates weren't firing on her target or she'd end up with their bullets so just before a strike she dropped her shields to make sure she wasn't on the receiving end of friendly fire.

There was one final vorcha between her and the fan. It carried a pyro-pack and was charging at her with flames billowing before it. Shepard didn't take cover, didn't raise her weapon. Instead she activated her omni-tool and overloaded the packs circuits.

The vorcha didn't even get the chance to scream as the pack exploded, rendering the creature into organic red mist and chunks of meat.

Shepard smirked, "That never gets old."

Massani laughed, Shepard was his kind of woman, if only he'd been a few years younger... and female apparently.

With the fans activated the cure began cycling through the system. It would take a couple days but the plague would be dealt with, the district wouldn't suffocate, Blue Suns, Blood Pack and the vorcha had all but been cleared out and Mordin had agreed to accompany them. All that was left was to pick him up, return to the Normandy and have a long, hot bath once she'd checked in on Garrus... she might even let Chakwas look at her hand while she was there.

Mordin looked up from his patient as the two human females returned. He nodded in approval, "Vorcha eliminated, environmental systems restored, plague symptoms declining. Well done Shepard."

Shepard gave a nonchalant shrug, "Hey, all in a days work."

The assistant glared at her, "She's the one who murdered the Batarian's." he informed Mordin like a kid tattling to his teacher.

Shepard rolled her eyes.

"Saved your life. Batarian's would have killed you. I would have done the same." Mordin wasn't put off by it in the least.

The assistant looked appalled, "How can you _say_ that! You're a _doctor_, you _help_ people!"

Mordin shrugged, "Lots of ways to help people. Sometimes cure them. Sometimes kill bad people to protect them. Now go finish diagnostics." he nodded to the door, effectively dismissing him.

The young man glared at Shepard who smirked at him and stepped aside to let him pass.

"Daniel. Good assistant. Bit soft." Mordin smiled with a touch of affection.

"So, ready to go Doc?" Shepard wasn't about to comment on the little cretin who was _blaming_ her so angrily for saving his ungrateful arse.

"Indeed. Lead the way Commander Shepard." Mordin nodded to her, he'd taken the time they'd been sorting out the environmental systems to ready himself.

With that done they made their way back to the ship.

Shepard cast a sidelong glance at Miranda as they approached the ship. Last time they'd been more than a little distracted with getting a dying Garrus on board to truly take note of any 'changes'. This time, however...

Miranda stiffened and her sharp gaze shot to Shepard accusingly.

Shepard smirked, "Something troubling you Miss Lawson?"

Miranda clenched her fist at her side and _glared_ at the woman. They'd _finally_ started being able to interact without divulging into a fight and now _this._ Miranda's pride wanted to rail at Shepard to get the logo repainted, _again_ but she also knew she had to pick her fights. Her more pragmatic side had recognized that Shepard responded more professionally and with a calmer perspective without the Cerberus reminders. She had proven it today by voluntarily removing the logo from her own uniform, Shepard had almost been a different person with her and much to her surprise she'd _enjoyed_ the byplay. To further this dispute at this point in time would be childish and Miranda was _not_ childish.

Shepard was waiting expectantly for the tirade. What took her completely by surprise was the very lack of expected tirade.

"No Commander." Miranda shook her head curtly and strode into the ship.

Shepard was left reeling more than a little at that, she scratched her cheek in confusion. Should she be _really_ worried now? Following her XO onto the ship she led Mordin to the science lab while the others went their various ways to clean up and relax after the mission.

Mordin could see the ship was a Cerberus vessel from the markings all over everything inside, consoles and uniforms mostly, though not _all_ the uniforms and he found that intriguing. His trained eye could also see that the sight of them put Commander Shepard on edge, it seemed she was not willingly working with Cerberus.

"Commander don't forget to have your hand properly looked at by Doctor Chakwas." Miranda reminded her as she headed towards the lift rather than the briefing room.

"What you don't think you did a good enough job? I need a second opinion?" Shepard couldn't resist, she was just _waiting_ for something to be said about the paintjob.

Miranda turned and glared at her, "I did a perfectly adequate job in the field and since then you've taken on just about half the remnants of the merc bands on Omega. You might not be feeling it now but if something in your hand doesn't set right you'll be bitching about it and I won't give a damn." she shot back heatedly.

Shepard chuckled, "Of course you'll care, I'm expensive and hot off the press you just don't want me permanently damaged just yet." she winked.

"Indeed. So when you're done with Professor Solus seeing as you'll be in the medbay anyway to see how Garrus is doing you can have Doctor Chakwas see to it." Miranda didn't argue with her and was almost relieved that the amused sparkle in her eyes remained.

Shepard scoffed but was still grinning as she finger flicked her in their unique manner that was similar to that of a Turian gesture of 'get lost' or 'fuck you'.

Miranda rolled her eyes and strode into the lift to go up to her quarters and shower off the stench of Omega.

"If you'd accompany me Professor?" Shepard led him to the lab instead of the briefing room. "This is the lab which will be yours to work in."

"Well equipped." Mordin nodded.

"If there is anything lacking please place a requisitions order through Operative Lawson." EDI's avatar popped up.

"Hmm modulated tones, hint of human emotion, not VI. Must ask Shepard is it an AI?" Mordin mused quickly and out loud.

"Yes, her name's EDI." Shepard nodded, leaning against the central work station, arms crossed as she took in the Salarian before her.

"AI, non-human crew members, Illusive Man branching out." Mordin turned his astute gaze to Commander Shepard, who by all accounts was supposed to be dead.

Shepard scoffed, "Not at all. We're all tools in his elaborate schemes. He knows that to buy my loyalty he needs to appear less xenophobic and give me reason to be _comfortable_. Therefore he's _allowing_ me to have non-humans on my crew, people who have no sympathies with Cerberus. But that's beside the point right now Professor. This is _my_ mission now and I run things _my_ way. At any rate if any of the Cerberus personnel cause you trouble just let me know and I'll throw them out an airlock."

"Thank you for concern. Can look after myself." he nodded confidently and moved to begin checking out the work station, still listening to her though.

Shepard nodded, "Understood, offers there if you want it though. Now," she walked over to a storage compartment and slid the cover aside to reveal the buzzing seeker inside, "these little buggers are called Seekers. The Collectors send them in to the colonies in massive swarms. Their sting paralyses the people for an unknown period of time but long enough for the Collectors to come in, load the people into pods and take them away without a fight." she explained.

Mordin had abandoned the work station to quickly come over to investigate the live sample.

"I need you to develop a counteragent or _something_ that can keep us safe from these guys. We don't know much about them, there's recordings of them in action and EDI's been monitoring this bugger. I'd be interested to know if their toxin or whatever it is they use to paralyse their victims is species specific. It could be why the Collectors let loose a plague that killed everything else on Omega, clear them out to make the humans easier to abduct." she shrugged, "But I'm just a soldier, scientific theories and such are beyond my little brain." she smirked.

"An interesting theory. I shall investigate. It makes sense not to target humans. Humans have the most genetic diversity, make for excellent control group. I look forward to working with you Commander Shepard." he bowed his head respectfully.

"The Normandy's got four levels, below is the cargo hold and engineering, this level has the CIC, lab, armoury and briefing room. One up is crew quarters, mess and medbay then the loft is top floor and my personal quarters. I keep an open door policy if there's ever anything you need to discuss. I'll leave you to get acquainted and EDI can help you out with anything else." Shepard nodded to him.

"Thank you Commander." Mordin's brain was already analysing the sample provided him.

Shepard smiled and went out to the lift.

Kelly looked over at her, "You've got some new messages on your terminal Stephanie." she tried out using the Commanders first name.

Shepard's brow rose slightly, "Steph, only my mother called me Stephanie and that was when I was about to get my ears chewed off." she gave a little smirk, besides it was _so close_ to her real name.

Kelly's cheeks flushed a little, "Steph it is."

"Then I'll check my messages after I've seen Garrus and get my hand fixed again, really should stop hitting things bigger than me." she chuckled darkly, "The looks on Garrus and Massani's faces when the Krogan embedded in the wall with his face coming out the other side of his hump was so worth it though."

Kelly paled a little wondering if Shepard was exaggerating, "I'm sure that would've been something indeed."

Shepard was still chuckling as she got into the lift. The mirth was gone however when she entered the medbay. Chakwas was cleaning up having only just completed the surgery to repair Garrus' face.

Garrus lay still and unconscious in his drugged state but alive and mostly whole.

"He's going to be fine Commander." Chakwas assured her softly.

Shepard nodded and removed her glove, she was still in her armour, "Knew he would. He's a tough old bastard and you're the best." she smirked and turned back to the motherly woman.

Chakwas crossed her arms skeptically, "What did you do?" she growled.

Shepard had the decency to look sheepish, "I _may_ have punched a Krogan in the face at full charge which _may_ have broken my hand again. But it was so totally worth it, you should have _seen_ the other guy!" she grinned.

Chakwas rolled her eyes at the childish enthusiasm in the Commander.

There were a few of the crew watching from the mess, Commander Shepard was _always_ watched. There were some chuckles as it became apparent that the Commander was being scolded and doing her best to look sheepish and contrite while at the same time pleased with whatever she'd done.


	18. Subversive Intentions

Shepard was pacing the briefing room, the holographic ship in the centre all but ignored other than avoiding it in her pacing as she thought about where to go next. She'd had a quick chat with the engineers Kenneth and Gabby who'd mentioned that a part she'd only be able to get on markets like Omega would help the ship run smoother. She also wanted to pick up some Serrice Ice Brandy for Chakwas and some other... beverages for personal consumption. But going back to Omega would require an escort and they all needed a break. Hell she hadn't even had a shower yet and was grateful the armour kept that fact from everyone else.

Miranda watched from her office over the 'security' feeds. Shepard was mulling over something but it was curious she'd chosen to do so in the briefing room and not her loft. Watching the woman she contemplated the interactions from the Citadel and Omega and was having trouble correlating them. Shepard had been ready to rip her apart over their _discussion_ about Cerberus, but removing the logo and not mentioning the organization or projects and Shepard was like a different woman, she was less guarded, friendly, _flirtatious _even_._ Was it really that simple to get along with her? To take away the visual reminders of her working with Cerberus?

From _that_ discussion she knew that Shepard was well aware of who they were, it clearly ate away at her. From _that_ discussion Miranda had began researching, moving around Cerberus spy programs that she hadn't been aware of initially. That had irritated her. Spy programs on _her_ workstation. She'd isolated them so whoever had put them in wouldn't realize she knew about them and could monitor them without them truly impeding her work. Anything for the Illusive Man she allowed the programs to see in case they'd been put in place by him, which after talking with Shepard had seemed more and more likely. Of course the Illusive Man himself would most likely know of everything as anything electronic that came and went from the ship was screened by EDI. If he asked she was getting facts and information to reason with Shepard after their altercation.

But the facts were _not_ reassuring.

She glanced up at her surveillance screen as Garrus strode into the briefing room and Shepard all but ran into his arms for a hug. She turned up the sound to listen in.

"I'm more worried about you Shepard. Cerberus? You do remember all those sick experiments they were performing?" Garrus looked to her worried, the right side of his face was being held together by cybernetic implants and a patch had been placed over them in the mean time to aid in the healing of his scales.

Shepards shoulders slumped, "I know, _I know_ Garrus. Which is why I need you. If I'm walking into hell I want someone I can trust at my side."

"You realize this plan has _me_ walking into hell to you know?" he smirked, "Just like old times. Besides you seemed _very_ friendly with that female."

"Miranda?" Shepard actually smiled, "Work in progress."

"What you think you can... what's the human phrase... 'flirt and convert'? Isn't that the saying Chief Williams used?" Garrus scratched his still numb mandible thoughtfully.

Shepard laughed, "I wish." she was aware of the many, many bugs on the ship, "She's an amazing woman and believe it or not we actually have the same goals."

Garrus gave the turian version of a frown, "Should I be worried Shepard?"

Shepard smirked, "What Miranda wants is for humanity to find a good, strong place in the galactic community. She's no xenophobe and it's not _dominance_ she's working for. What she _hasn't_ realized yet is that her goals and those of the Illusive Man are different. That he's using her merely as a tool as he would have her use me." she sighed, "I just hope she realizes it before he swallows her soul."

Miranda considered that comment thoughtfully, she _had_ picked up that they shared the same fundamental ideals, they just went about them in very different ways. The thought that Shepard believed she was just being used as a tool, that they both were, was not new to her. She herself was comfortable with the notion, it gave her _purpose_. She had worked to bring Shepard back for a _purpose. _Clearly Shepard was _not_ comfortable with the notion, she'd have to find a way around that.

Garrus could read humans pretty well since serving on the first Normandy and Shepard especially so, "What is it Shepard? Who is she?"

Shepard smiled sadly, "An incredible woman Garrus with so much potential. Cerberus has..." she sought for the right words, "Hell Garrus, they've tried to snuff out her heart. Think of it as fighting an organic over an AI. An AI is predictable, fights in a certain way, uses only the tools at its disposal with clinical precision. But an organic is unpredictable, can alter the way it fights is more dynamic and if it doesn't have the right tools they _create_ it and think _outside_ the box."

Garrus nodded slowly.

EDI listened with great interest.

Miranda was most definitely not sure she was all that happy with this analysis so far.

"Miranda is an organic the Illusive Man has tried to make into an AI. He's made her predictable, trained her to fight in a certain way and use tools with clinical precision, sure she's creative and fucking amazingly intelligent but that heart of an organic... that unpredictability makes for loose cannons to those who require the utmost in control over their subject." She nervously fiddled with her fingernails, wondering if Miranda was somehow listening and being very careful with what she said.

"And of course this Illusive Man requires utmost control." Garrus nodded again as he wrapped his head around what Shepard was trying to explain to him.

"Yes. Therefore he's tried to drill it out of her and in doing so it's made her put up walls around her heart." She rapped her knuckles against his chest over his heart.

"And you need her heart, you need her to fight like an organic." Garrus smiled, straightening his shoulders as he understood, or so he thought.

"I..." Shepard stepped back and looked to the holographic image of the Normandy, "I'd _like_ that yes but... the very last thing I want... I would never..." she wrung her hands nervously like Tali.

Garrus realized something and his eyes widened, "Oh you _like _her."

Shepard went bright red, "Of _course_ I like her, I believe I let that slip when I told you she's _incredible_."

"Oh no, no, no," he waved a talon at her, "you want to _court_ her." he grinned at that little gem of information.

Shepard leaned against the rail with her head bowed, "What I want is of no importance. It never has been." she murmured.

"Bullshit Shepard. What about Liara?" He demanded, arms crossed now and annoyed that she viewed her own needs so low when she'd fight tooth and claw for the needs of others.

"That was different, I needed her to keep my mind steady. Yes I care about her, as a dear friend but the melds were never about love. Hell, she kept me human Garrus, she anchored my mind whenever the sea of the Protheans threatened to overwhelm me. I know she wanted more but I could never..." Shepard could feel herself getting emotional and closed her eyes, squeezing them tight. She'd never been able to openly share with Liara for fear of what would happen if the gentle scientist touched the savage beast in her.

"You could never actually love her?" Garrus asked curiously.

"The thought of me joining with her terrified me. She was so... innocent and I'm... not." her brows furrowed and she looked down at her hands with heavy shoulders, "I... there's a part of me I can't describe other than savage. Most of the time I keep it tucked away but there are times when... when it surfaces and I _become_ something other than 'Commander Shepard'. It happened today, not as bad as Torfan but enough that I wasn't myself after seeing what those mercs did to the humans... to those innocent kids just for being human."

Garrus had never seen her like this, she'd never spoken of it to him before. Reaching out he gently took hold of her shoulder, "Shepard, sometimes to protect those who can't protect themselves we must become something those who would harm the innocent fear. Whatever this is you feel inside you, you obviously keep it under tight control until it's needed. There's no shame in that, none at all. I have the greatest respect for you, for your skills, your leadership and I am honoured to call you friend." he encouraged her with earnest sincerity.

Shepard looked up and him and put her hand over his, gracing him with a small smile, "Thanks Garrus, that means a lot to me. I consider you a great friend as well."

Garrus grinned down at her, "Good." he wasn't really one for soft moments like this but Shepard was different. He'd do anything for her if she needed him to. "So this Miranda..." he stepped back out of reach as she went to jab him in the ribs with her elbow.

Shepard shook her head with a soft chuckle, "Gear up, we're going shopping."

Garrus followed her, shaking his head. No matter how much he thought he understood her he realized he had no clue. Was this what human males felt about their females? If so it wasn't any wonder the females usually always had the upper hand psychologically, especially the older ones. He knew _never_ to mess with Doctor Chakwas not even _Shepard_ dared that.

Miranda had forgotten all about her reports in listening to that conversation. It had been quite enlightening listening in, and not just because it was apparent the Commander had something of a crush on her. Was what had happened with Aria somehow related to this 'savageness' she felt inside her? Was violence against the innocent the only way to bring it out of her? She was pondering this when something else Shepard had said came to mind prominently. She was going _shopping!_ "Damnit!" she hissed and shot to her feet.

Shepard knew the click of those heels and muttered under her breath to Garrus, "Brace yourself Vakarian."

Garrus quickly stiffened and looked around for danger. His predatory gaze landed on an irate human woman in white and black uniform. "She's all yours Shepard." he muttered and quickly went on ahead.

"Coward!" Shepard called after him.

"Shepard what the hell are you doing?" Miranda snapped at her.

"Shopping. You made it abundantly clear that taking you last time was such a waste of your time and Garrus knows all the good places to shop..." Shepard shrugged nonchalantly then smirked, "All the nice dress shops." she glanced at Miranda in time see the fist coming at her but deciding to let it connect.

Miranda hissed in pain, hitting armour was stupid.

Shepard chuckled, "I'd offer to kiss it better but I think I'd get a black eye."

"At the minimum." Miranda growled, "This is Omega you can't just..." she stopped as Shepard suddenly put her hand on her shoulder.

"I figured you'd catch up sooner rather than later Miranda. Even doped up on meds Garrus knows Omega better than any of us." she grinned, "Besides you know you're always welcome to come shopping with me."

Miranda glared at her but kept in stride with her. She had so many questions to ask but now wasn't the time. No she'd ask _those_ in the privacy of the ship. "What's on your list?" she grumbled.

"Some parts for Kenneth and Gabby, brandy for Chakwas and I want to check out some non-standard mods. Anything _you'd_ be interested in Miranda?" she asked curiously with a cheeky grin as she anticipated the answer.

"From _Omega_?" Miranda just about spat in disgust.

Shepard chuckled.

They didn't spend long on shopping. A Quarian on pilgrimage had the parts they needed as well as some interesting mods Shepard paid _way_ too much for. Miranda had been about to scold her when the Quarian reverently looked up from the credit chit to Shepard, his voice cracked with heartfelt emotion as he thanked her and told them he'd be able to buy a ticket off of Omega now.

Garrus had chuckled and elbowed her, "Softie." he'd teased her.

Shepard had merely shrugged, "So I have a soft spot for Quarian's on Pilgrimage. The poor kids get thrown out into a universe that hates them for their ancestors mistakes and wonder how they get themselves in so much trouble."

They'd followed her to a few merchant stalls, watched her bargain with them like a native of Omega then they'd gone to Afterlife to purchase the 'medicinal' supplies for Chakwas... which turned out to be a little more for Shepard's personal medicinal purposes.

As they were about to leave one of Aria's thugs approached.

"Shepard, Aria's got a job for you." the turian looked to her expectantly, well aware that Aria was watching on from above.

"Oh really?" Shepard crossed her arms and looked over him coldly.

"She's got information that someone's gonna take out Patriarch. She wants you to get him out of sight." he passed on the simple message.

Shepard waited for more but none was forthcoming and the turian became fidgety under her glare. "Why the fuck would I do that? I'm no babysitter for Aria's pet krogans." she growled dangerously.

The turian flinched, "Look, you're not on Aria's payroll, it won't be seen as her protecting him..."

Shepard's face rose and shot Aria a withering glare the asari met coolly. Shepard snarled and gestured curtly before stalking towards the back of the club that led down to a second level Patriarch was known to inhabit.

Aria simply smirked. Yes, she _always_ got her way.

"Shepard!" Patriarch greeted the little human warmly and with a proud chuckle, both arms wide waiting for the traditional greeting.

Shepard bounded in exuding energy, confidence and inspiring awe as she returned his greeting, "Patriarch!"

They clasped wrists and slammed shoulders.

Patriarch chuckled as he felt the strength in her, "You've been working out."

"I'm a busy girl." she shrugged.

"Yeah, hear dying can do that." Patriarch nodded his bulky form at odds with the human gesture. "T'loak still trying to get in your pants?"

Shepard scoffed, "Trying's the word alright." she scowled.

"Can I get ya a round or too busy to share war stories with an old krogan?" he laughed at her predicament. The human had a quad walking the line she did with the Asari alpha bitch. But he saw what Aria didn't. Aria had yet to realize that it was _Shepard_ who was the true alpha. It was _Shepard_ who let her remain as the top bitch of Omega. Should Shepard ever change her mind Aria would be dead, not a trophy, not a defeated icon to wave at her enemies but dead.

"You know I enjoy hearing your tales of crushing the skulls of your enemies." Shepard motioned for Miranda and Garrus to remain outside of the alcove to keep watch, "Perhaps in private?" she glanced at the guests.

Patriarch considered her for a moment, "You heard her, scram." he gestured to the entrance.

Everyone in the alcove, about a dozen in total, left quickly as ordered by the old battlemaster.

Shepard sauntered over to a lounge and sunk down into it while she played with something on her omni-tool, she'd already set up a looping feed for privacy from Aria's security net and was checking to make sure everything was green.

"So what seems to be the matter today?" Patriarch waited expectantly, looking down at the lounging human who was like a graceful wildcat, poised, coiled and deadly. They'd established this method of communicating without Aria's overbearing paranoia becoming aware of their 'private' talks.

"It appears Aria's got word of an assassination attempt for your life. She wants me to sneak you away and hide you out of sight." she scoffed at the idea, shaking her head in disgust.

"You have other ideas I take it." he smirked.

Shepard looked up at him with a calculating expression, "Indeed I do. Right now you're a pet on a leash, no kraant and barely considered krogan by most of your kind."

The words were harsh but true and the old krogan knew it so merely nodded.

"But what if word got out that Patriarch's kraant dealt with the assassins, in a bloody and brutal manner?" she purred, letting the thought mull around in his mind.

Patriarch's yellow eyes started to light up a little at the thoughts that began to trickle in. "What do you have in mind?"

"Seen Garm recently?" she smirked and once again activated her omni-tool. The image she was about to show Patriarch was one Massani had taken of the Krogan Blood Pack merc from Archangel's apartment.

His eyes widened at the holograph and he grunted, "How did you do _that_?" he asked with admiration.

"My fist versus his face." She held up her hand and chuckled, "Hurt like hell and got a couple broken bones but hey. My fist won."

He roared out in laughter, "Oh I would love to see you in action Shepard but there's no way you could do that."

"Vakarian!" Shepard barked.

Garrus appeared suddenly.

"How did this happen?" she gestured to the image.

Garrus smirked, "She taunted him into a bloodrage charge, met it with her own biotic charge and punched him in the face. It was the spirits be damned best thing I've ever seen!"

Shepard nodded and dismissed him.

Patriarch looked at her with a completely new level of respect. "So this kraant you're suggesting..." he left her to finish her idea.

"Myself and my two friends outside will deal with the assassins. You will begin building up your strength again then when you're ready I'll be back with my squad and will kill the bitch leaving _you_ in charge again." she waited for his next question, knowing exactly what it would be about.

His eyes narrowed, "From Aria's pet to your puppet?" he rumbled.

Shepard rose to her feet smoothly, "In a manner of speaking. How you run Omega is entirely up to you but I do have some expectations." she took a menacing step towards him, her fierce glare beating down his with ease, "Clean up this stinking shit hole. Get the fucking gangs off the streets. No more slaves, prostitution, drugs."

"That's where just about _all_ the credits come from." He snarled at her.

"So go fucking legit. Do you have any idea how many corporations would kill to get set up out here if it was safe enough? You could make a shitload more credits because out here there aren't the bloody exorbitant Council taxes and if you play your cards right you could even get legit with the Council." she wasn't sure how that suggestion would go and could sense his confusion.

"Why would I want that?" he scoffed, shaking his head again.

"The Reapers are very real and they're coming whether the Council believes they exist or not. How do you think people are going to respond when a place like Omega steps up while the Council stick their heads in the sand? They'll flock here like stink on shit." she flashed him a feral smile, her voice low with promise. "I've also heard that Urdnot Wrex is changing things up on Tuchanka, uniting the clans. Think of what an alliance with Urdnot would do for _both_ of you."

He pondered thoughtfully and for the first time in centuries began to feel the flicker of hope. "These thoughts do merit quite the consideration."

"You get your shit together and I'll deal with that bitch. From that day you'll have a standard galactic year to clean up Omega. I don't know when the Reapers will strike, hopefully not before I can convince the Council to get their arses in gear, but I need Omega solid before they get here and Aria has shit for brains. But you... you can get it done." she stepped back from him, "And you know I'll kill you if you fail. Aria has yet to grasp that concept." she reminded him in a firm tone that set the bones trembling in fearsome warriors.

Patriarch nodded, feeling the shiver. "You do all that you say and we have a deal. No slavers, prostitutes or drugs, Omega cleaned of Aria's filth and ready for war in a year of her demise." he rumbled holding out his hand.

Shepard shook it, "Done." she grinned up at him, "Well old beast it's been enjoyable catching up but you know me, places to go, people to kill."

Patriarch chuckled, "Be off with you then whelp."

"So the old reptile coming or what?" Garrus asked curiously as Shepard emerged alone.

"No, we're going to track down these assassins and deal with them ourselves. My guess is they'll be lingering around the back door, wouldn't dare come down through the upper level as Aria would flay them alive. Also given that it's Omega they don't spend weeks plotting right Garrus?" she glanced up at the turian.

"Not generally no." Garrus acknowledged as he and Miranda fell into step with her.

"And the fact that Aria's found out about it and came running after me means the _assassins_ are probably not very..." she strode through the door to come face to face with a half dozen krogan mercs armed with shotguns and flamethrowers, "far." she laughed, she actually laughed, "No fucking way!"

"Keep walking _human_." one of the krogan snarled at her.

"You lot here for Patriarch?" she asked, hand on her hip and looking calm, collected and totally not concerned that they were outnumbered by the massive reptilian species.

At that they straightened from their relaxed and bored mannerisms and went for their weapons.

"What's it to you?" the speaker growled fiercely.

"Well you picked a hell of a day for it. You see," she strode up to him completely unfazed by the weapons that were immediately trained on her, "we're Patriarch's kraant and he's sent us here to make a bloody mess of you." With that she pulled back her left arm and let loose an earth shattering biotic punch that wasn't quite as brutal as the one she pulled on Garm but it still had the krogan's face exploding through its hump.

Garrus and Miranda immediately opened fire on the closest to Shepard.

Shepard didn't even go for her guns. Instead with one hand she called up a stasis field... _inside_ one of the mercs causing him to literally explode. With her other hand she slapped a singularity between the rear three pulling them off balance and smirking as without being told Miranda finished them off by warping the singularity.

It was bloody and messy as requested. The walls were painted with krogan blood, organic matter and shrapnel from their less than adequate armour.

"Think that'd be all of them Garrus?" Shepard asked, flicking off a chunk of meat from her thigh with a small measure of disgust evident on her features.

"I'll do a sweep just to make sure." Garrus rolled his shoulder and slunk off to blend in the shadows as he had done as Archangel.

Shepard nodded and looked to Miranda who had a near unreadable expression on her face, "I had to make it messy, deter further attempts on Patriarch's life." she defended thinking that was the problem.

Miranda simply nodded and waited to follow her lead, saying nothing. In fact she'd said very little on this trip, something that Shepard had noticed.

Shepard considered the woman long and hard and for several moments both women refused to back down. Miranda's gaze was quickly turning to ice whereas Shepard's was more curious. Shepard cocked her head slightly, "Is everything alright Miranda?" she asked genuinely.

"I would like to speak with you privately when we return to the Normandy." Miranda responded curtly.

"As you wish, you know my door's rarely locked." Shepard smiled, wondering what Miranda wanted to talk about that she didn't want to discuss here, maybe the paintjob?

Miranda simply nodded and followed Shepard back into the club.

Patriarch looked over as Shepard and another woman entered his alcove, "Back so soon?"

"Yeah, idiots were waiting right outside the doors for when you left next, I've got someone scouting just to make sure that was all of them. You'll find a terrible mess on the way out so don't slip and break something important now will you." she smirked up at him.

He chuckled, "Well then, looks like I owe you Shepard."

They shared a meaningful nod. He knew what was expected next of him and he was not about to cross this human.

Miranda frowned. They would also be discussing whatever _that_ was as well.

"See you round old beast, try not to piss off Aria too much." she winked, bidding him goodbye for now.

He merely chuckled once more and returned to his drinks and companions.

"Want a drink while we wait?" Shepard asked Miranda, hoping to somehow ease the tension from her.

"No thanks." she shook her head, not about to drink anything from this pisshole.

"Suit yourself." Shepard shrugged and approached the bar. Catching the attention of the batarian bar tender she felt a moment of discomfort at being served anything by a batarian but quickly shoved it aside. He'd given no indication of recognizing her after all. "Serrice Ice Brandy." she ordered her drink, a favourite she shared with Chakwas.

He grunted and prepared the order.

"Wow, look at you. Anyone ever tell you what an amazing waist you've got?" a turian beamed broadly at Shepard who was leaning casually against the bar.

Shepard glanced at him, he was a little flushed along his crest and obviously tipsy but not quite at the drooling drunk stage yet, "Not recently, are you feeling inclined to make an observation or merely question one?" she smirked back at him, her body language instinctively slipping into a more Turian demeanour. Straightening up, turning slightly, accentuating her hips and shoulders.

"Depends if I'm gonna get my arse blown off, you're packing some serious firepower there." the Turian grinned, nodding towards her weapons.

Shepard chuckled and nodded to the batarian in thanks for the drink. Lifting the glass to her lips she tossed it back and grimaced at the sharper than usual bite it had. Scowling she lowered the glass to the counter and tried to clear her throat of the increasing burn.

The Batarian was smirking darkly at her.

Shepard's eyes widened as her stomach began to convulse and her vision began to get spotty. Lightning fast she whipped out her pistol and shot the Batarian between the eyes before she started coughing up blood and dropped her pistol.

"Shit!" Miranda cursed, heart beating wildly as Shepard's whole body began to shake, "Garrus get back here immediately, Shepard's been poisoned."

"_On my way._" Garrus responded quickly.

Taking Shepard's arm Miranda draped it across her shoulder and dragged her out of the club at a smart pace, Shepard tried to walk alongside her but her feet weren't cooperating.

Miranda knew there was little time judging by the amount of blood Shepard was coughing up. She wouldn't be able to get her back to the ship for proper treatment until Shepard was at least stabilized. Good thing she knew Shepard's physiology by heart. Quickly getting her down in a quiet alley she set to work.

When Garrus found them there was little he could really do other than scare off vorcha and scum who'd try to get the jump on Miranda while she kept Shepard alive.

Shepard came too with a splitting headache and stomach ache. "How many d'I drink?" she moaned, feeling ready to heave any minute now.

"One." Garrus was so relieved to hear her voice and feeling terribly guilt ridden, "I should've warned you not to get a drink from there, the batarian bar tender has a nasty habit of poisoning the drinks of humans. I'm so sorry Shepard." he shifted his weight uncomfortably and his crest was flushed.

Shepard scoffed and ended up coughing for her trouble.

"Easy now Shepard, we need to get you back to the ship. You're regenerating but I don't have the equipment to see how much damage was done here." Miranda held her shoulder to steady her.

"What... no room... in your back... pocket?" Shepard wheezed, a grin tugging the corners of her mouth.

Miranda decided if she was joking she wasn't in too bad a shape, "You're welcome to inspect my back pockets if you insist."

Shepard's eyes widened and she was not yet coherent enough for a suitable come back.

Miranda smirked and held up her finger, "How many fingers?"

Shepard considered the offered digit curiously. Reaching up with a slightly shaky hand she gently took hold of Miranda's wrist and brought it closer to her face, then further away then she cocked her head and brought it closer again.

Miranda rolled her eyes and flicked her wrist free, "Come on, let's get you back to the ship." she stood smoothly and held out her hand again to help the Commander to her feet.

"Gotta see Aria first." Shepard insisted as she accepted Miranda's hand and stood, her world tilting suddenly and she moaned.

Miranda quickly steadied her again, "You're in no shape for another _dance_ with Aria." she growled firmly.

"No dancing, just getting paid." She muttered, reaching up to touch her lips that were caked in blood. Grimacing she was very grateful when Garrus held out a canteen of water. Swishing a couple mouthfuls around she swallowed the bloodied water and her face scrunched up at the horrible feeling of it trickling down her raw throat.

"We _need_ to get you proper medical attention, _then_ you can go see Aria." Miranda reasoned with her firmly, annoyed at her insistence to see the Asari in such a state when Aria would most certainly try and take advantage of her weakness.

Shepard looked up at her cobalt eyes that were expressing her annoyance and frustration right now. She sighed softly and nodded, "As you wish Miranda." her voice was a huskier than normal murmur.

Miranda was relieved Shepard wasn't going to argue with her, she obviously was feeling the effects of the poison more acutely than she thought. This was confirmed when Shepard swayed on her feet. Taking Shepard's arm over her shoulder once more Miranda supported her as they began their walk back to the ship.

Garrus looked to Shepard, highly concerned... until she winked at him with a cheeky smirk. He bit back his chuckle and shook his head at her, Miranda would so kick her arse if she figured out Shepard was _faking_.

* * *

><p><em><strong>He he he! Seph and Miri will be having quite the chat soon. Just got to wrap things up on Omega then we're heading off for Grunt to see what he adds to the mix. It'll take a little more than five seconds to get there however... ;)<strong>_


	19. Intentional Provocation

Miranda helped Shepard back to the Normandy and felt a slight shift when they approached the airlock as Shepard stood a little straighter. She glanced at her, the colour had returned to her face, her breathing was coming easier and she was in fact walking on her own.

"So when do I get to check your back pockets?" Shepard asked cheekily, she had thoroughly enjoyed the feel of Miranda pressed up against her, the strength of her arm around her waist, the subtle scent of her shampoo...

Miranda rolled her eyes and released Shepard, stepping away from her and for a moment there was the tiniest little pang of regret at the loss of warmth, it was quickly quashed under the realization that Shepard was standing there grinning at her with no support required. Scowling she gestured to the ship, "Get your arse to Chakwas, Shepard." she growled and strode into the airlock.

Shepard grinned as her eyes flicked over Miranda's physique, "Hmm see what you mean, no room for anything else in those back pockets... wait, what back pockets? I can't see..." she was stopped mid sentence as Miranda turned with deliberate slowness.

Miranda clicked her fingers at rear level then gestured to her eyes, "Eyes up here Shepard." she commanded her firmly.

Shepard looked up with a smirk, "Hmm there's good to, you really do have..."

Miranda cut her off again, "I'm glad you're feeling better Shepard. Now focus on the mission, not my assets." she growled, stepping aside and motioning for Shepard to go ahead of her as clearly leading Shepard was going to cause issues at the moment.

Shepard mock saluted, "Yes ma'am."

Miranda scowled as Shepard's usual swagger returned and she sauntered into the airlock ahead of her. Damn that woman was infuriating!

They didn't speak as they headed to the lift.

Kelly bit back her concern at the sight of Shepard so bloodied as she seemed to be walking alright and neither Garrus nor Miranda looked worried for her. "Commander, when you're ready you've got some messages." she informed the woman as she passed.

Shepard nodded to her, "Thanks Kelly, I'll get to them up in the Loft."

Kelly noted the additional huskiness and figured something must have happened to her throat, she was very curious about what but was not going to ask with Miranda glaring at her like that. Instead she cleared her throat and returned her attention to her console.

Garrus left the pair to clean up his weapons in the armoury leaving them alone in the lift.

Shepard glanced at Miranda, "After I've seen Chakwas I'm going to clean up. Did you want to talk before or after I see Aria?" she asked amiably.

"After, when we're on route to our next destination. We've been on Omega too long." Miranda sniffed in distaste.

"Yeah, no arguments there. That place reeks, I swear it gets in everything." Shepard agreed with a light hearted smile.

Miranda looked to Shepard pointedly, "I'll be coming with you when you see Aria. I _don't_ trust her alone with you." she asserted before Shepard could even _think_ of leaving her behind.

Shepard was amused, "Oh? Feeling a little possessive are we?"

Miranda stiffened and her eyes narrowed, "It's my _job_ to keep you alive and make sure you succeed. After your _last_ visit with Aria it's clear you need backup or she _will_ get in your head. You didn't get out of that stasis field until _I_ boosted your biotics."

Shepard frowned slightly, "That was _you?_"

The lift doors opened but neither moved to leave just yet.

"Yes it was Shepard. You're _not_ seeing her without me." Miranda asserted firmly before striding out.

Shepard watched her for a moment. The end of that particular dance with Aria was a little hazy but she definitely remembered a warm, soothing touch that had reached through the cutting glass shards of Aria's biotics. That touch had been just enough for her to exert herself to throw Aria off. Shaking her head slightly she followed Miranda to the medbay.

Chakwas looked up with a concerned frown, "What did you do?" she asked quickly, examining Shepard with her critical medical eye.

"Had a drink at Afterlife's underground. Little more _bite_ to it than expected." Shepard scowled, "Bloody Batarians, he poisoned my drink and stood there grinning at me when I started convulsing." she smirked, "Shot him between the eyes before Miranda dragged my arse out of there and I passed out." she explained as she automatically went to one of the beds and began taking off the chest piece of her armour.

Miranda had gone straight to the medicine cabinet knowing exactly what was needed.

"How're you feeling now?" Chakwas was scanning her as she talked and got out of her armour.

"Like I've been king hit in the abs by a krogan." Shepard admitted, sitting on the bed now that the upper half of her armour was removed.

Chakwas was flicking through the scanner results with a thoughtful 'hmm'. She was brushed aside, much to her displeasure, by Miranda who was clipping a module into an injector.

"Should have _known_ not to order a drink from a Batarian." Shepard muttered under her breath.

"I would say not all Batarian's are out to kill you, but if your statistics are anything to go by then it would be a safe assumption that they are." Miranda pressed the injector against Shepard's neck.

Shepard winced but made no comment on the shot, "_They_ attack human worlds then get all 'she's a racist murderer' when I lead the retaliation strike ordered by the Alliance. Hypocritical cowards." she growled darkly.

Both Miranda and Chakwas wisely refrained from any comment on that regard.

Miranda turned to Chakwas, "I gave her a Hetatophin-A antitoxin shot after boosting her immune and digestive responses as well as purging her stomach contents in the field to flush the toxin as quickly as possible from her system." she explained.

"Wait, I _threw up_?" Shepard interjected, mortified at that revelation.

"It was necessary, would you prefer an injury to your pride or to be dead?" Miranda shot back quickly.

"Is that a trick question?" Shepard shot back just as fast.

"You'd rather be _dead_ than have thrown up while unconscious in a side alley that could hardly have been considered public with only two people present?" Miranda crossed her arms and levelled Shepard with an intense glare.

Shepard blushed and looked away, she'd most definitely have preferred for Miranda _not_ to have seen her like that. Damn Batarians.

"Let Chakwas examine you then have EDI alert me when you're ready to go." Miranda ordered her assertively before turning and striding out of the medbay.

Shepard sighed, "Examine away Doc."

Chakwas did so, not quite sure how to interpret what had just happened. Shepard very rarely followed orders when it came to medical matters without a very firm hand yet here she was sitting quietly and without complaint. She did not begrudge Miranda administering the antitoxin as with things like that time was a crucial component and Miranda _had_ rebuilt Shepard after all. After having put two years of highly intensive work into a subject she could understand some _possessiveness_ over Shepard in regards to medical matters. So when it came to the Commander she was walking a very fine line between letting Miranda take the reins and ensuring those reins didn't mean Shepard was somehow manipulated or handicapped by anything Cerberus related. There were also things about Shepard'a physiology that now baffled her, changes that had been brought about by Cerberus and differences that had been _exacerbated_ by them but she had already begun to notice before the destruction of the first Normandy. Commander Stephanie Shepard was a very unique young woman.

Miranda and Garrus both joined Shepard as she went to meet with Aria having showered and washed the blood from her armour. Looking at her now you couldn't tell than an hour ago she'd nearly died from poisoning. However she was behaving decidedly _uncomfortable_ around Miranda.

Aria took one look between Shepard and Lawson and smirked, "Lovers tiff?" her grin widened as both women just about snarled at her.

"Not in the mood T'loak, you owe me." Shepard growled, being pissed off was a good cover for not wanting to join with her 'privately' so she definitely portrayed the look even though she wasn't annoyed she was embarrassed.

Aria motioned for her to sit, "My sources tell me Patriarch's _kraant_ handled the assassins. Funny, I didn't know he had one." she became the cool Queen of Omega again.

"Well either your sources suck or are misinformed, which still sucks come to think about it." Shepard shrugged, sitting as directed.

"It's not what I asked but you got the job done." she picked up a datapad from the small table beside her lounge and tossed it over. "Here's your payment. A cache of resources I no longer need."

"Or can't get your hands on? What's the catch?" Shepard frowned as she looked at the data skeptically.

"No catch. I don't need them. Simple as that." Aria shrugged as though it was no big deal. "So why did you pose as his kraant?"

"You think I have the time to go play hide and seek with a fucking ugly krogan? It was simpler and quicker to just hunt down the fools and kill them, not that I had to look far." with that she rose to her feet, "I'll give you this warning once. Any Collectors come calling, kill them. That plague was of their doing and was supposed to hit the whole of Omega."

Aria snapped to her feet like a snake, her eyes narrow and seething, "So why weren't humans affected?" she demanded.

"Do I look like a fucking Collector?" Shepard snapped back at her, "The Collectors paid the vorcha to release the plague which is why it was able to be quarantined because the vorcha are so brainless. If they'd paid someone more intelligent," she took a step forward, her body somehow seeming larger and far more dominant, "you'd all be dead."

Aria's eyes widened at that prospect.

"I recommend you get in touch with Mordin's clinic and give them whatever they need to synthesize enough cure to run through the stations environmental system but keep it quiet or the Collectors will just alter the disease and you'll be back to square one. Dead." She stepped back, "You remember Garm don't you."

Aria scowled, he was one of the more powerful battlemasters of the Blood Pack, he was in charge of their operations on Omega, "Of course."

Shepard activated her omni-tool, she transferred the image of Garm to Aria's omni-tool. "Should I hear that humans are being targeted again what I left behind of Garm and those fools who thought it was a good idea to hunt humans will be _nothing_ compared to what I'll do to you."

Garms shattered body sprang to life on Aria's omni-tool. Aria's eyes narrowed slightly until she made sense of the image, the smashed in face that was little more than a crater, how deeply the battlemaster was embedded in the wall...

"Keep your people in line Aria." Shepard warned with a curt nod before turning to walk away.

"You think you can threaten _me_?" Aria snarled, her biotics flaring.

Shepard flared her own and quickly sidestepped a biotic throw that hit one of Aria's goons instead. She lashed out her hand and wrapped Aria in a stasis field. Never before had she overtly dominated Aria but now, now she did.

Aria struggled but couldn't escape the grip of the humans biotics much to her shock and dismay.

Shepard turned back to her slowly, her eyes blazing with both red cybernetics of rage and the energy of her biotics, it was surreal, inhuman.

"I _am_ Omega!" Aria yelled at her fiercely defiant.

Shepard made a fist.

Aria's eyes boggled as the stasis field began to crush her hard and fast. She bit her lip to stop herself from screaming but Shepard was unrelenting and crushed harder.

Aria's scream ripped through the club and _everyone_ looked up at the dais she ruled from.

Shepard released her enough that she could breathe and listen, "Omega existed before you. It will exist after you. You are the Queen bitch because I allow it. I have even tolerated your 'don't fuck with Aria' rule. Your arrogance is required to keep Omega in line but it's also blinded you to the fact that I am not to be trifled with. You look at me and see a short lived human curiosity. You know there's something different about me which is why you've been trying to get in my head." Shepard's voice was devoid of all emotion and tone and it was that _lack_ of anything that was far more terrifying than if she'd been spitting fire.

None of Aria's goons dared open fire as the turian and other human woman had taken up position between them and the woman's biotic shield let them know in no uncertain terms she could crush them with a thought. Aria didn't use asari in her private guard, only turians and batarians and the batarians were already terrified shitless of Shepard.

"That difference within me is what makes me far stronger than you will ever be. Do not fuck with me or the humans on Omega or I will make what an ardat-yakshi does to your nervous system feel like foreplay." Now _that_ threat she snarled before crushing Aria once more until she passed out from pain and lack of oxygen.

No one _dared_ get in the way of the Spectre as she sauntered out.

"Are you sure that was smart?" Garrus whispered to her.

"Nope but I'm sick of her trying to rape me." Shepard grunted in return.

"Oh so flat out trying to _kill you_ is a better idea." Garrus muttered.

Shepard scoffed, "Aria is nothing Garrus, she's replaceable." was all she would say on the matter while still on Omega. She wasn't going to tell him just yet that she'd _intentionally_ provoked the asari for just that purpose.

* * *

><p><em><strong>So things wrapped up on Omega... I know this one was a bit shorter than the last few but thought the next scene needed a chapter in its own right.<br>**_

_**Coming up next the much anticipated confrontation between Seph and Miri... well the second one really but this one just might address some of those underlying issues between the two... ;)**_


	20. Unravelling

"Mind if I get something to eat?" Shepard glanced at Miranda in the lift.

"I'd recommend soup until tomorrow." Miranda offered calmly, not surprised in the slightest that Shepard was hungry, she'd used her biotics a lot today.

"Thanks, can I get you something as well?" Shepard asked softly, a little nervously in fact.

"No thank you Commander." Miranda kept her voice cool, she didn't want to encourage Shepard further in regards to any emotional attachment. A professional working relationship was one thing, actual friendship was something else she wasn't willing to investigate.

"As you wish." Shepard shrugged, stepping out of the lift only to be stopped by a slender hand.

"Why do you keep saying that?" Miranda frowned at her, it was familiar...

Shepard shrugged a little, "Does it bother you?" she glanced back at the frustrating woman.

Mirada released her arm, "No it's not that... it just, never mind. I'll wait for you in the loft." she nodded brusquely for Shepard to go.

Shepard returned the nod and left her to go see Gardner, she was certain Miranda would busy herself on her console as she wasn't the type of person to just sit and wait and twiddle her thumbs. That didn't actually concern her. She had no doubt Miranda would have remote access to her console anyway and that _none_ of her message would be private. This was a Cerberus ship after all and the Illusive Man was a control freak and so was Miranda. She thought to herself about that one, control freak or perfectionist? Somewhat different, same results.

There was a subtle shift in the ship as Joker took them away from Omega. They were heading to Korlus now to find a krogan Warlord Okeer. According to the Illusive Man's dossiers he'd been researching a cure for the genophage and had contacted the Collectors for technology to help his research. This made him ideal in the Illusive Man's eyes and far less from ideal in Shepard's. _Especially_ considering the Collectors wanted her arse and had already gone to incredible lengths to try and get it. How was she supposed to trust a krogan Warlord wouldn't try to hand her over in exchange for more technology? Thinking about it made her head hurt and her stomach growl.

Gardner grinned, "What can I getcha Commander?"

"Soup. Lots of soup thanks Gardner." she sighed, wanting something more filling but her stomach was a little sensitive right now.

"Anything in particular?" He asked her thoughtfully, scratching his bristly chin.

"Whatever's your specialty." She flashed him a disarming grin and went over to the coffee machine, "Send me a message when it's ready, I'll be in my quarters."

"Yes ma'am." he grinned at her, she was a treat to cook for, ate everything he threw her way without the bellyaching the others had given him before they'd hit the Citadel where she'd arranged for decent food supplies for him to work with. Both he and the crew had been very grateful for her thoughtfulness.

Miranda glanced at the hand that deposited a mug of coffee on the desk beside her before moving on. "Thank you."

Shepard just nodded and kept walking.

Miranda continued typing for a few minutes, glancing up every now and then to watch as Shepard got out of her armour and into some more comfortable slacks and tee-shirt. She was moving well, showing no signs of injury and in the past few days the scars on her face had been closing over quickly. She swallowed a mouthful of coffee and looked quickly to the console at the thought of Shepard's scars. If Shepard's response in the bathroom hadn't been evident enough Kelly's psychological report confirmed that having those blasted scars removed had been a mistake on her behalf. Mistakes did _not_ sit well with Miranda Lawson.

Shepard smirked at the note from Kasumi on her pillow.

_There were seven bugs in your room, two in the bathroom, all now getting acquainted with the garbage crushing unit. I like Sake._

_ K_

The bugs weren't a surprise to her, even that there'd been bugs in her bathroom, that Kasumi had taken the time to search the entire loft for them was. Next decent port they stopped at she'd investigate getting the thief a bottle of Sake. She glanced at the AI terminal, how to get privacy from EDI...

Miranda was a little startled when soft piano began to play. Looking up she saw Shepard had seated herself on her lounge and was playing a few warm up chord progressions. After a minute or two she began to play a soft classical piece. Listening closely she identified it as Albinoni's Adagio in G Minor, a soft rather sad sounding piece that was quite soothing to listen to. Putting aside her report writing she just sat back and listened.

Shepard could frustrate the hell out of her but damn could she play, and the _way_ she played... She'd closed her eyes and was playing from memory, her body was flowing with the rhythm of the music, her hands were light and graceful as they danced across the holographic keys. It was so beautiful to watch and hear Miranda was disappointed when the song ended.

Closing down the console she stood, coffee in hand, to join Shepard on the lounge. Looking down at the mug in her hand she frowned slightly, "How did you know how I like my coffee?" she asked softly.

Shepard smiled, looking a little surprised as though she'd forgotten Miranda had even been there, "Could tell you, might have to shoot you though."

Miranda gracefully sat down positioning herself to face Shepard and crossing her knees comfortably.

Shepard flicked off the holographic piano when Miranda didn't respond to the jest. "So what did you want to talk about?"

Miranda smiled, "I was actually quite enjoying listening to you play. How long have you played the piano?"

"Since I was seven. My best friend was learning, she was older and I wanted to do everything she did." Shepard smiled sadly, she turned and propped up her legs on the length of the lounge comfortably. "Annoyed the hell out of her but she put up with me, even taught me a few songs herself."

"I'm surprised you like classical music." Miranda mused thoughtfully, this was the most relaxed she'd seen Shepard since she'd become conscious again.

"What, just cos I can drill you between the eyes, crush you with my biotics and can Choi Kwang Do your arse doesn't mean I can't like a good old classical piece or two." Shepard mock pouted, her amber eyes twinkling with mirth. "Besides you can do all that stuff and still like classical, why can't I?"

"I didn't say you couldn't, just that I'm surprised." Miranda smiled, "Few people do these days."

"Ah tell me about it, all that head banging just gives me a headache. Classical music soothes the soul." she sighed wistfully, relaxing her head back into the top of the lounge and closing her eyes as she lost herself momentarily in a piece she played mentally, letting it flow through her mind.

Miranda waited a few moments before breaking into that reverie of Shepard's, "I wanted to discuss several things with you. Firstly your biotic abilities." she watched the subtle shifting of Shepard's weight and that her lips pursed a little, she was bracing herself for something and in all likelihood about to become very defensive if she wasn't careful in how she phrased her questions. "I'm very curious about what you did with your eyes, I've never seen an ability like that."

Shepard cocked her head slightly and looked to Miranda, "It wasn't in your files on me?" she asked pointedly.

Miranda frowned, "I've come to see that there is a lot about you not in my files. It seems you have done an excellent job at keeping secrets even from the Alliance." she admitted freely though not without a pang of self-recrimination.

Shepard scoffed, "The Alliance should know all about how well I can keep secrets, they made me after all."

Miranda thought quickly, "Your identity as Stephanie Shepard?"

"Yeah." Shepard took a sip from her own coffee.

Miranda was very interested in finding out who the real 'Stephanie Shepard' was but she could see Shepard had just tried to deflect her from her original question and that made her even more curious about it. "Does the Alliance know about your eyes?"

"No." Shepard sighed, damn she wasn't subtle enough.

"What exactly do you see when you use it?" she pressed when it became apparent she would have to ask Shepard very specific question for more than one word answers.

"I..." Shepard took a deep breath, "If I haven't told the Alliance about it, what makes you think I'll tell Cerberus?" she asked softly.

"Cerberus isn't asking, _I_ am." Miranda clarified for her, hoping the distinction would help loosen her up a little.

"And the fact that we're sitting in a Cerberus vessel filled with Cerberus observation devices and a Cerberus AI listening to our every word doesn't count?" Shepard countered, holding Miranda's gaze pointedly.

Miranda held her gaze, "That didn't seem to bother you in the briefing room with Garrus." she pointed out.

"Huh, so you _were_ listening." Shepard huffed, scowling at her now, "Also proves my point. I'm sure the Illusive Man's been enjoying the footage from my bathroom, have you checked yours Miranda?"

"Cerberus has no _need_ to monitor _either_ of us in the bathroom." Miranda shot back at her, not believing for a second the Illusive Man would commission such a placement of observation devices.

Shepard wordlessly got up and grabbed Kasumi's note, she tossed it over to Miranda who caught it smoothly, "Think she'd lie to me?" she sunk back down into the warmth of the position she'd left only briefly. "Think if he's bugged my bathroom he wouldn't bug the bathroom of the perfect woman?"

Miranda read the note and glared from it to Shepard, tossing the datapad onto the coffee table.

"You're a _tool_ to him Miranda, one he enjoys the benefits of greatly and he's a power hungry _man_." Shepard could feel herself getting angry on Miranda's behalf and quickly sat back, releasing her clenched up fist she didn't remember clenching in the first place.

Miranda was watching Shepard closely, "It bothers you to be thought of as a tool doesn't it." she observed calmly.

"It doesn't bother you?" Shepard's brows rose in surprise at the unspoken admission in that simple observation.

"It helps me find my place in the universe given how... I came to be." she shrugged and sipped from her coffee.

Shepard looked at her incredulously, "You were genetically engineered by an ego-maniacal bastard so that gives others the right to use you as they see fit so you feel like you have purpose?" she blurted without thinking.

Miranda stiffened and looked to Shepard sharply, "How do you know that?" she demanded coldly, her eyes like spears of ice piercing into Shepard's.

Shepard's eyes widened and her expression was like an open book declaring 'oh shit' momentarily before shutting down again into a mask of sadness, "My childhood interest you now Miss Solheim?" she asked softly.

Miranda felt as though she'd been punched in the gut and paled, she rose to her feet in anger, her biotics flaring, "How the bloody hell do you know my name?" she hissed through her teeth.

Shepard remained laying on the lounge, if Miranda wanted to hit her she'd have to come over here, "You know I'm not one for digging up information, so you tell me, how could I possibly know your name? That Nielson's Fifth Adagio Movement is your favourite? That you've been drinking your coffee white with two sugars since you were fourteen, _Miri_?"

"Don't call me that, don't you _dare_ call me that!" Miranda snarled at her, her biotics flaring brightly, glaring fiercely into Shepard's amber eyes. A sharp pain spiking through her head behind her right eye hit her with such sudden ferocity it almost knocked her off her feet.

"As you wish." Shepard shrugged, trying desperately to keep the nonchalance when her heart was racing and she was so torn between yelling at Miranda who she was and making Miranda remember her.

The pain spiked further and Miranda groaned, reaching up to hold the right side of her head, her biotics fizzling out and she swayed dangerously close to falling.

Shepard winced at the throb behind her right eye but was more concerned with Miranda right now. "Miranda?" she got up quickly and walked over to the woman who was sucking in air in short shallow gasps, "What's wrong?" she gently took hold of her shoulders to steady her.

"My... my head." she whispered, finding it hard to concentrate on anything other than the pain that was ripping through her mind.

"Shit!" Taking Miranda's arm she draped it over her shoulder and began leading her quickly to the lift, "Chakwas, I'm bringing Miranda to the medbay, something's really wrong with her." she alerted the doctor.

"_Specifics?_" Came the reply from the doctor.

"Sudden intense pain in her head, right side." Shepard didn't need a degree in medicine to know this was bad.

"_I'll be ready for you._" Chakwas didn't bother telling her to get here right away, she could hear it in the frantic concern in Shepard's voice that she was already doing that.

Shepard ended up half dragging Miranda to the medbay where Chakwas had already prepared a bed and scanner.

The crew in the mess stared and murmured amongst themselves wondering what had happened, had Shepard hit Operative Lawson again? They all knew what had happened on Freedom's Progress and that things could get real tense between the two powerful women.

Gardner put aside the soup he'd just finished making for when the Commander was finished with whatever was going on with Lawson.

"When did it start?" Chakwas asked both of them, Miranda's face was ashen and her eyes tightly screwed shut, her lips pursed in a grimace of pain.

"A couple minutes ago I think, she didn't say anything about having a headache before." Shepard gently helped Miranda lay on the bed, tenderly brushing her hair out of her face as she did, "She was mad at me and biotically flaring." she added, figuring that would be important information.

Chakwas frowned, she was already scanning Miranda's head, "If she was an L2 I'd say it was a migraine like Kaiden's but she's an L5, they've shown no evidence of any of the side effects as the L2's." she spoke softly in consideration of the groaning woman on the bed.

"Happened before." Miranda hissed through her teeth.

"How often?" Chakwas asked her.

"Twice." came the pain filled response.

"Do you know what brought it on?" Chakwas pressed, motioning for Shepard to move away for now as she administered something to help with the pain.

Miranda's pain wracked brain tried to sort it out. All three times had one thing in common. "Shepard."

Shepard and Chakwas exchanged a confused glance, Shepard shrugged and reached over to take hold of Miranda's hand, "I'm right here." she offered, not sure what Miranda had meant by that.

"With you... all three times." Miranda managed to push out the words, the pain starting to recede ever so gradually but even gradual was enough to help her begin to slowly think more clearly.

Shepard's frown deepened, "Doing your head in am I?" she quipped softly.

"First time?" Chakwas shot a 'shut up now' glance at Shepard.

Shepard was looking at Miranda with deep concern so missed the look from the doc.

"Citadel. When you... when you asked me... who you were." Miranda answered between gasps.

Shepard stilled.

"Second time?" Chakwas was getting some strange readings in a very localized position in Miranda's brain, one associated with memories.

"After Aria's... dance... your eyes... all three looking at your eyes..." Miranda realized with a breathless gasp, opening her eyes to look up at Shepard who was holding her hand and looking incredibly worried.

"Oh _shit_." Shepard breathed as understanding dawned. These headaches only happened when she reminded Miranda of _Persephone. _She pulled away from Miranda, "That _fucking bastard!_ He did it, he _fucking did it!_" she hissed in fierce outrage, her biotics flaring dangerously and her vision becoming spotty.

Miranda's own biotics reacted to the fierce call of Shepard's and flared.

"Shepard get out! _Now!_" Chakwas ordered her firmly, she'd seen Shepard lose her temper only once, it hadn't ended at all well. She fully expected to be treating Shepard for broken hands in the near future and just hoped no one got in her way.

Shepard stormed out cursing vehemently under her breath the entire way to the gym, music wouldn't be enough to soothe her right now. Attacking the big black punching bag with wild abandon she didn't notice the glances she was getting from a couple of the crew, or that they discreetly made a quick exit. Neither did she notice when the vinyl become slick not with sweat nor the increasing squishiness and sharp pain in her hands.

"By the spirits!" Garrus gaped, "Shepard _stop!_" he surged forward and wrapped his arms around her sweaty and blood spattered form.

"Let me go!" Shepard snarled at him, trying to twist free.

"Shepard look at your hands! _Look at your hands!_" he yelled at her with a huge amount of concern colouring his gravelly voice as he clamped down on her with superior turian strength and body size.

Shepard stopped fighting and looked at her hands. Her eyes widened, "Fuck..." she breathed in horror at herself. Sure she'd broken her hands before, only a finger or a meta-carpal here and there but this... "Chakwas is going to fucking murder me." she breathed in horror. Her hands were a bloody mess, so broken up and twisted they looked _deformed_. "Shit, shit, shit!" she sobbed as with the realization of the state they were in came the pain that adrenaline and rage had been holding at bay.

"Come on." Garrus released her and tugged her shirt to lead her up to the medbay.

Chakwas had been expecting Shepard. She had not, however, been expecting the pale faced, trembling, bloodied woman being brought in by Garrus. Her eyes widened at the nauseating state of Shepards hands. She touched her comm, "Professor Solus this is Doctor Chakwas. I need your assistance in the medbay for a medical emergency."

"_On my way Doctor._" Came the swiftly spoken response of the Salarian.

Miranda was laying in the bed having her brain monitored to try and determine just what was wrong with her. At first she thought there was something significantly wrong with her personally, then Shepard and Garrus entered her field of vision and her gaze zeroed in on Shepard's hands. "Shepard what did you _do!_" she demanded, aghast at the damage to those very expensive hands that could create such beautiful music and cause such horrific violence.

"Punching bag won today." Shepard murmured, her breath hitching in her throat as she bit back a sob, tears were streaming down her cheeks and she wished she could just cut off her hands right now they were in such agony.

Miranda went to get up but was stopped by Chakwas firm doctor's tone.

"_You_ stay in bed Miss Lawson. Mordin and I will see to this." she growled at the Operative.

Miranda felt rather helpless as Garrus got Shepard on the bed and was bustled out of the medbay promptly once Mordin arrived... and she had to just lay there while her brain was scanned. It was almost humiliating and she had to bite her lip to stop from giving suggestions to the two highly trained professionals now working on Shepard.

Shepard said nothing as the doctors got to work. No light banter. No attempts to lighten the mood. No trying to weasel her way out of being confined to the medbay for the next two days. Nothing. She just lay there as the two doctors worked to save her hands.

Her silence was almost more concerning than what she'd done to her hands.

It took Chakwas and Mordin a little over two hours to repair the damage. Chakwas left to get cleaned up with a stern 'Don't even _think_ about leaving.' to the Commander meaning that for a few minutes it was just Shepard and Miranda in the medbay.

Miranda got up and stood beside Shepard, looking down at her bandaged hands, the forlorn expression on her pale face. "Shepard, why'd you do it?" she asked softly.

"I was mad." she admitted in a hollow voice, not looking at Miranda.

"At what?" She hadn't been able to make out what Shepard had been snarling before Chakwas had sent her out.

Shepard didn't respond.

Miranda reached down and gently touched Shepard's arm, feeling her shiver at the contact, "Why were you so mad?"

"Your brain just about blows a gasket when you look in my eyes, what's not to be mad about?" Shepard muttered, turning her head away from Miranda, eyes shut tightly.

"That's hardly logical, just looking at something cannot..." Miranda began to counter the thought when Shepard turned and looked up at her, amber eyes meeting blue.

"Who am I Miri?" She asked softly.

Miranda swore and turned away as the pain struck her again.

Shepard waited a few moments for Miranda to straighten and look at her again in confusion, a look she'd never thought she'd see on the woman's face. "Someone went to a great deal of trouble to ensure that you don't identify me. You see you actually _do_ remember me you just see someone else when you look at me. You only see Stephanie Shepard, not who I was before and when you get close to remembering, _that_ happens and it's clearly getting worse." Shepard closed her eyes and turned her face away from Miranda again.

Miranda looked back to Shepard, a little breathless and wondering if there was a remote possibility that Shepard was _right_. But who would be _able_ to interfere with her mind like that? Two names came to mind immediately, but which one and _why?_ Not to mention just _who_ was Shepard? She grimaced, inhaling quickly as just thinking about it literally made her head hurt, confirming what Shepard had said.

Shepard heard the gasp and if she hadn't been so doped up on pain meds she would have realized that she felt a whisper of Miranda's pain. She spoke softly, her heart just _aching_ at what this was doing to Miranda, to both of them, "Don't think about who I might be Miranda. Not yet. I know that will be hard just... please wait until it isn't going to kill you."

It was going to take a great deal of effort and concentration _not_ to think about it now but Miranda Lawson was disciplined and determined. The thought of someone toying with her mind like this was galling. She would undo this, she'd brought Shepard back from the dead and she was in a field of her own when it came to the intricacies of the human body. Returning to her bed with tightly clenched fists and jaw she vowed she would find whoever did this to her and make them pay. Glancing over to Shepard, who was silently crying, she was determined that she would _remember_ who Shepard was. Why Shepard had looked at her with utmost trust the first time she had opened her captivating amber eyes on that operating table.

* * *

><p><em><strong>I know, I know you all wanted the 'I'm Persephone' moment. I swear it will come and it will be so totally worth it! Hope I was able to capture some of the deep emotions in this one. <strong>_

_**Oh and couldn't kill off Aria juuust yet, Patriarch does need some time to prepare after all and Aria will most definitely be retaliating for being so forcefully shown up, Seph might have a 'do-what-i-want-and-get-away-with-it' badge but we all know that always has consequences.**_


	21. The Beginnings of Trust

Miranda had taken the results of the scan and locked herself away in her quarters several hours ago leaving behind a perfectly miserable Commander Shepard.

Helen looked down at the younger woman and shook her head, "I can't keep repairing your hands like this. Another episode like that and you might permanently damage them. No more shooting, no more piano." she asserted, bringing out the tough love on the woman who was like a daughter to her.

Shepard just nodded.

"You need to find another way to channel your anger than through your fists. Or actually _wear_ proper protective gear." She looked from the bandaged hands to Shepard's face, she was still pale and far too quiet.

"Yes mum." Shepard murmured and managed a small smile.

Helen sighed, "I can't fix everything, neither can medi-gel. I'm confining you to that bed for two days, any funny business and it'll be longer."

Shepard looked up at her and nodded. For the first time that actually sounded good. Two days not having to worry about saving the universe, mercs attacking some poor sods, Collectors abducting another colony...

An hour later she was bored out of her mind.

Kasumi snuck into the medbay and sat on the bed beside Shepard watching her curiously. Shepard was humming softly under her breath and her toes were tapping the air in time to whatever beat was in her head. It was quite adorable really.

"So what's the song?" she asked with a cheeky grin.

Shepard started and looked to her sharply as she hadn't heard anyone come in.

Kasumi chuckled.

"Nielson's Fifth." Shepard sighed, relaxing and so grateful to finally have some company.

"Ah classical. Didn't peg you as a classical fan." Kasumi grinned and got herself comfortable.

"Miranda didn't either and she spent two years _studying_ me." she sighed, thought's of Miranda were depressing right now.

"So what actually _happened_ with the lovely Miss Lawson? The crew all thinks you punched her out again." Kasumi asked with a sidelong glance at the Commander knowing that Shepard had a thing for the gorgeous _Operative Lawson_.

"Figures." Shepard frowned, she wasn't sure how Miranda wanted to handle this whether she _did_ want the crew to simply believe that or they'd start questioning her capabilities.

"So did you hit her?" Kasumi pressed, eager to find out the juicy gossip.

"We... had a disagreement." Shepard murmured, "I don't really know what happened." she admitted truthfully as she looked over at Kasumi, "Thanks for taking care of those bugs." she grinned and her eyes twinkled just a little, "You _might_ want to keep a constant vigil in the showers, Massani really is a perverted old man."

Kasumi laughed, "Already found a couple that didn't match Cerberus tech. I _may_ just have to replace them in _other_ places for him. I also cleaned up in here. I'm the best because no one knows my face and I'd like to keep it that way. I figured you'd want a _little_ bit of privacy in your quarters to."

"Appreciate it. So what was your favourite heist?" she asked, hoping to completely change the subject away from Miranda and was pleased as Kasumi began to delve into some of her misadventures in a world that was not as foreign to the ex-Alliance Commander and Spectre as the Master thief imagined.

Being subjected to imprisonment in the medbay had not turned out to be as relaxing as Shepard had first suspected. Sure Kasumi and Garrus came to visit her and Chakwas kept a very close eye on her but in between visitors Shepard's mind had a great deal of time to wander. A significant amount of that wandering time was put into Miranda and now that she wasn't overtaken with rage she was able to think a little more clearly on the matter. She wasn't sure if that was a blessing or a curse.

Her first thoughts had been that Miranda's father had been the one behind it. After all, he _had_ done everything in his power to get rid of her for interfering with Miranda's progress along his predestined path for her, not that _that_ had gone as he'd planned. But Miranda had left his control long before _Persephone _had become widely known as _Stephanie_ Shepard. This was significant because Miranda's response when asked who she was, was always instant and came along with her usual repertoire of achievements as though she was reciting a programmed response. That would make it more likely that whatever had been done to her mind had happened _after_ she'd left her father.

But then what reason would the _Illusive Man_ have for such a ploy, I mean it made her an incredible risk taking her on missions as if she triggered a memory response in the midst of a fight the results could be disastrous.

It was making her head hurt.

She just didn't have enough information to make any kind of reasonable, logical conclusion. That worried her more than words could express. Because if someone _other_ than Miranda's father or the Illusive Man had done this did that mean they were being watched by someone _else_? What possible reason could be had to keep her true identity hidden from Miranda? If it was about love it was incredibly ineffective as if she'd won Miranda's heart once what was to say she couldn't do it again? She could not see any plausible reason for someone to do this.

Then there were the thoughts concerning how she could keep herself from possibly reminding Miranda of her past. The first thing was clearly her eyes. She _loved_ the colour of her eyes, they were so unique and the colour was such a rich, golden amber she'd never seen in anyone else. Changing their colour seemed... necessary but goddess it was going to be just _another_ thing changed about her. At least this one would be voluntary, though it would have to wait until they docked somewhere with a decent med centre. So until then what could she do, wear a visor? Or would drawing attention to the fact she was keeping her eyes hidden from Miranda just make it worse for her?

BAH it was making her head hurt!

Chakwas looked over at the frustrated Commander who'd been rather good at obeying her order to stay in the med bay for a day and a half. She was fidgeting and glowering at her hands like they were despicable to her. It was childishly endearing.

Sensing the doctor's attention Shepard looked up, "Can I go see her? I promise no hitting things, no playing piano and I'll come straight back here."

Chakwas shook her head, "You've got seven hours left, I won't be clearing you for active duty yet and I'm banning you from the punching bag."

"But..." Shepard began to whine.

"No buts! Doctors orders. If you cannot refrain from hating on that poor defenceless bag I'll have it removed." Chakwas was adamant and her blue eyes bore into Shepard's with the superiority of age and the authority of being the ships senior medic.

Shepard sighed, "Alright no more hating on the bag. But seriously it's my _hands_ that are broken not my _feet._ Look I can even sit up all by myself like a big girl. Can I please go speak with Miranda now?" she asked again.

Chakwas had to fight valiantly to withhold the smile but it still touched the corner of her lips, "You will return here as soon as you are done." she finally relented, she knew to pick her battles with Shepard and it was rare that she actually _asked_ rather than just snuck out.

Shepard was on her feet in a second, "Thanks." she smiled and nodded, very aware of Chakwas eyes following her across the mess. She did make a slight detour to get Miranda a coffee seeing as she hadn't seen her leave her quarters from the view the bed in medbay provided of the mess. Gingerly she touched Miranda's door chime.

"Come in." Miranda's voice acknowledged the request.

Shepard entered to find Miranda at her console with what she imaged was a cold coffee or empty mug.

Miranda was surprised that it had taken Shepard this long to come see her, "How are your hands?" she asked politely.

Shepard shrugged, "Eh, they've had better days. I believe they're still quite upset at me with being beaten into submission as they were." she brought over the coffee and carefully deposited it by Miranda's right hand.

Miranda scowled and shook her head, "I told you to look after your hands. Your recklessness and disregard of your own wellbeing puts everything we're working towards at risk and has put us behind."

Shepard was about to argue she was being a bit melodramatic but she wasn't finished yet.

"It's _your_ responsibility to recruit the specialists and form this squad. We'll be at Korlus in nineteen hours and you are _not_ fit for active duty."

Shepard cocked her head slightly, "So _you_ lead the retrieval team."

Miranda looked startled by that for a brief moment.

Shepard sat down calmly, "Jacob already follows your orders, Massani will follow cos your hot, though you _may_ want him on point or somewhere he's not going to be distracted by your arse." She advised Miranda.

Miranda rolled her eyes and scoffed in annoyance but she could handle men like Massani.

"Kasumi won't be a problem and Garrus will do it because I tell him to. Besides it's generally a bad idea to have _both _the Commanding Officer and XO groundside on dangerous missions. Picking up a krogan Warlord in a nest of Blue Sun mercs will hardly be a walk in the park." Shepard shrugged, sitting back and looking anywhere but at Miranda.

It took a moment for Miranda to process that and its future consequences, "So when your hands are healed and we're both on active duty one of us will always be remaining behind? Shepard that's _absurd_. I'm the best you have..." she began to argue heatedly at the thought of being _benched_.

Shepard interrupted quickly and assertively, "You _are_ the best and I want you to _stay_ the best. In the Alliance either the Captain or XO _always_ remains on the ship to monitor and assess the situation and external influences on it." She looked away and her voice was softer, "There's also the fact that until you're able to figure out what's going on in your brain we can't spend much time together. I will _not_ risk you having an aneurism or something by simply looking at you the wrong way or saying something that will trigger it."

Miranda was silent at that.

Shepard closed her eyes and bowed her head, "I can't lose you again and I trust in your abilities to lead."

Miranda purposefully concentrated on that last half as contemplating the first could trigger another attack, "I appreciate that you trust my abilities but that's beside the point. This is _your_ mission, not mine and taking that mindset will have me confined to the ship unless you're injured as you are now."

"Your job is to make sure I succeed, if I recall correctly." she reminded her with a small smile, "We can do this together." she risked a glance back at Miranda, "Yes it will mean more ship time for you, it will also give you more time to figure out what's in your head. When you do figure it out we'll look at this again. But for now it's a risk to your health that I can minimize."

Miranda took a deep breath. Shepard did make an excellent point. "As long as this doesn't interfere with the mission."

"When you and I take the field together it's a risk to the mission. I have no idea what it is about me that will trigger you other than my eyes. If you were to have an attack like the one in my quarters on the field it could put everyone's life at risk. Which means that the best thing for you to be doing is to fix it and as I may have already said, you're the best there is. Whatever you need Miranda just let me know." Shepard offered her with deep sincerity.

Miranda was a little unsure how to take that. She was so used to thinking of herself as a tool that it was easy for her to dismiss this as Shepard wanting to fix a broken tool to make it more effective again. The _emotion_ behind it, however, felt real, felt as though Shepard was using the mission as an excuse to allow her all the time and resources she needed to get better. "Thank you Shepard." she hesitated for a moment.

"Ask me." Shepard nodded, seeing the hesitation.

She leaned forward, elbows on her desk and face lowered a touch submissively though the subtle manipulation wasn't truly required in this instance, "Two of the dossiers are for specialists on Illium. While we're there Cerberus has some resources I can use to get a better handle on what exactly has been done to my neural pathways so I can work on a strategy to undo this."

"Do it. If you need Jacob for back up or Kasumi to do something sneaky take them with you." Shepard's response was instant. Then she grinned, "By the way, totally saw through that little move there. But very cute."

"Cute?" Miranda's brows rose, no one had called her _cute_ since she was a kid!

Shepard shrugged nonchalantly, "Now Korlus. I want cameras on each of the squad so I can watch you in action. I was thinking one forward one behind so I can yell at you to watch your arse..." she frowned, "And that didn't sound right did it."

Miranda smirked.

Shepard just shook her head, "You know what I mean. It'd also be a good idea to record what we do so we can give the Council their blasted _proof_." her frown deepened.

Miranda considered it and approved as it would enable _her_ to keep an eye on Shepard when she was the one in the field, "We could also use it to analyse squad tactics. You're an excellent tactician and given that the people we're picking up are those you've never worked with before it will help you plan your strategies."

"I hadn't thought of that. I like it." Shepard cocked her head slightly as she considered that point of view. "Huh, I can come up with a couple good ideas, who'd have thunk it?" she grinned and rose to her feet.

Miranda shook her head at the woman, though she _did_ smile, "Indeed."

"I'll give you tactical advice in the field, but you'll be in charge. Is that suitable?" Shepard went back to business.

"Yes, as long as you realize _I'll_ be giving you tactical advice when _you're_ in the field." Miranda put out there without a second's hesitation.

"Wouldn't have it any other way." Shepard grinned. Then a thought occurred to her, "How do you want to handle what happened? The crew's all whispering that I knocked your lights out again. I... just told Kasumi we had a disagreement but didn't confirm or deny anything more than that." she admitted cautiously.

Miranda took it in stride, "It would be best they thought that. They cannot know about this or they'll question if I'm fit for this position."

Shepard sighed, "Well then I guess I should apologize for hitting you. Any penance you require?" she smirked.

Miranda's thoughts turned devious, "I'll get back to you on that one Commander."

Shepard's grin quickly dropped, "Should I be worried?"

"Depends on how apologetic you are doesn't it." Miranda was smirking now and enjoying the look of slight trepidation on Shepard's face.

"I'm really, _really_ sorry?" Shepard offered with no sincerity whatsoever.

Miranda gave a soft laugh under her breath.

"I'll let you get back to work before Chakwas thinks I've ditched." Shepard grinned, thinking a quick exit was in order.

Miranda frowned, "Did you sneak out?"

"No, I had permission to see you and go straight back." she glanced down at herself, "Wouldn't mind a shower though. Chakwas is releasing me in seven hours..." she sighed.

Miranda nodded to her bathroom, "Have a shower then, I'll get you a change of clothes. And yes I checked it for bugs." she scowled, "You were right."

Shepard kind of wished she wasn't, "Being someone's tool isn't the only way to find purpose in life. I can't give you purpose, but maybe I can help you find it on your own terms and not someone else's." was all she said on the matter before she ducked into the much smaller bathroom than the one in the loft. She didn't care about size, only hot water and to feel _clean_.

Miranda sat there for a few moments musing over the entire conversation, analysing it in both its segments and entirety. What stood out to her was that Shepard _cared_. Whoever she was, however they knew each other it had been as friends. The pain stabbed at her and she quickly shut off her thoughts, turning her face away from the bathroom Shepard was currently in. "Damnit." she hissed to herself. Waiting for the worst of it to pass she went up to the loft to get Shepard a change of clothes.

Shepard rubbed her right temple with a scowl at the small throb that began to irritate her. It didn't last long though. Perhaps it was just from being cooped up in the medbay too long.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Have I got you all trained to expect daily updates yet? :)<strong>_

_**That said I have to apologize that with Christmas I have interstate rellies coming up for a week meaning updates will continue in the New Year, though I might be able to sneak the next chapter in tomorrow. I've made some significant plot changes to what I've had written before I started posting so from hereon it'll be a couple days between chapters with this story and Voice of the Wardens.  
><strong>_

_**Yeah know this chapter was mostly fluff but fluff needed to set the scene for what's coming up.**_

_**Next it's Korlus. How do you think it will go with Miri in charge groundside?**_

_**Nightbrainzz: So loving you comment on just about EVERY chapter! Yes I was most definitely channeling Ash in the last one. Three reasons: Liked it in the game. Totally fits Seph. Ash and Seph are/were (as yet undecided) BFF's and though they may not have had 'soft stuff' nights where Seph played her classical stuff and Ash read her poems they did rub off on each other as friends sometimes do. Which will make Horizon very interesting to write, may be quite the defining moment for these two.**_

_**Kaiya Smith: I'm so with you on the channelling Darth Vadar so no I hadn't planned on Seph telling her anything more. However, someone else will. Thing is will Miri be ready for it and how pissed will Seph be with them.**_

_**Boo: I heartily embrace my sappiness! And figure it can't be too bad if you've ready up to ch 20 ;) Though more action will be on the way as we pick up the squad and really sink our teeth into the story. I kind of feel I've been introducing everyone to the concept and big issues as it is somewhat different to the actual game.**_

_**Hessan: I had a look at the end of ch 20 and yes I cringed. I've fixed it up now to make it easier to read, thank you for pointing it out, greatly appreciated. Anything else cringeworthy I'm more than happy to look at it.**_

_**To everyone else who's been reviewing thank you so much! I really appreciate the feedback and feel all warm and fuzzy when people actually share they like my story and it inspires me to write more! As HB commands I am off to write Korlus! Will post when I am satisfied it's decent enough for such unbridled desire for more!**_

_**Enjoy :)  
><strong>_


	22. Untested Acquaintances

Shepard and Miranda stood side by side at the head of the briefing room holographic table with Garrus, Jacob, Kasumi, Mordin and Massani haphazardly standing around the table that was showing their preliminary scans of the target area on Korlus.

"Given how soundly I beat up my hands Miranda will be taking the lead on this one." Shepard looked over all five faces and as expected there were no complaints though Garrus did look uncomfortable. With that said she stepped back half a step and nodded to Miranda.

"Our target is the krogan Warlord O'Keer. We believe his lab is located here given the amount of medical equipment and resulting energy traces EDI has detected." she highlighted a position on the holographic map that was a jumble of both ancient and recent ship carcasses, this world was a giant junk yard of scrapped parts. That meant scavengers. "This area is held by Blue Sun mercenaries,"

Massani snorted at that.

Only Shepard knew the real reason for that particular response.

"and the closest landing position for the shuttle is here." a second location some distance from the first lit up.

"Meaning we're going to have to hot foot it, as you humans say." Garrus nodded decisively, standing a little straighter as he did.

"Yes." Miranda brought up the planned route, "This is the quickest route to O'Keer. The Blue Suns will not tolerate our presence so will be considered hostiles. Massani you will be on point, Kasumi you will scout the route ahead, Garrus you will cover us with your sniper, Mordin you will remain on the Normandy to continue your research." she ordered them all with her standard clipped business tone.

They all nodded in understanding of their orders.

Mordin bowed his head respectfully, "Will return to lab then. Available if required though."

Shepard nodded her thanks to him.

"We will all be fitted with cameras so Commander Shepard can see what we can." Miranda advised them, Jacob had already prepared the appropriate gear for that.

Garrus chuckled, "Keeping an eye on us Commander?" he looked to her much more relaxed at that piece of information.

"Of course. I'll offer tactical advice given what we can see from up here but Miranda will make the calls. The cameras will also help us see how you all work together tactically so we can plan better for your individual fighting styles." Shepard returned his grin and her quiet calmness reassured the others that she was perfectly fine with handing the reins of this mission to Miranda.

"Gear up, we'll be dropping in ten minutes." Miranda glanced at the time, calculating their distance from the planet and how quickly they could get this done.

The team filed out quickly, except for Garrus who waited to speak with Shepard alone.

Miranda glanced at him coolly as she passed, knowing that he was going to be speaking with Shepard about her leadership on this mission. Both she and Shepard had anticipated it but it was still highly irritating to have her command questioned by the turian.

"What's up Garrus?" Shepard asked him amiably, smiling up at him.

"You went in to battle with a broken hand. Why are you _really_ letting Miranda take charge? Does this have something to do with you knocking her out again?" He demanded quickly, he would never disobey her order but he needed to _understand _it.

"No. You saw the state of my hands and Chakwas hasn't cleared me for active duty yet. It'll be a couple days before I can properly hold a gun and when we went after Mordin I still had _one_ good hand." She smirked, "It was my idea actually. Miranda was yelling at me for being reckless and putting the mission behind being unable to lead the ground team." Her grin widened, "You should have seen her face when I suggested _she_ lead it. I have never seen her so surprised before." she reached up and lightly clapped his shoulder, "She'll be fine, follow her orders like you'd follow mine. I'll be watching and bitching at you all from up here." she assured him cheekily.

Garrus nodded then, a little relieved it had been Shepard's idea but still it was concerning what it could mean in the future.

Shepard had made herself quite comfortable in the co-pilot's seat that was rarely used. "You are so right Joker, the leather really does make a huge difference." she grinned over at him.

"What did I tell you Commander." He returned her grin in delight, "I could sleep here!"

"Technically you already do." EDI piped up.

Joker scowled, "And there's the down side. It's like ship cancer, I liked the Normandy better when she was nice and _quiet_."

"Aw Joker, you'll hurt her feelings saying things like that." Shepard chuckled at his displeasure at the AI.

Both Joker and EDI responded at the same time.

"_It_ doesn't have feelings."

"I don't have feelings Commander."

Shepard looked from Joker to EDI's blue orb and burst out laughing, "That was _priceless!_"

Joker went red and glared daggers at EDI's orb.

"_If you're about done antagonizing our pilot and AI..._" Miranda's voice cut in, "_We've just landed in case you hadn't noticed._"

"Yes I _had_ noticed. Something else I noticed, an increase in Blue Suns chatter." Shepard pointedly didn't tell Miranda what to do with that information just yet.

"_Well then let's be quick about this._" Miranda motioned for the team to move out.

Joker cast a sidelong glance at Shepard, "Hey Commander, you really okay with this?" he murmured so as his voice wasn't caught by the comms.

"Yep." Shepard was scanning the feeds of the squads cameras calmly but with alertness.

"You're letting a _Cerberus_ operative lead on _your_ mission." Joker was stunned as all get out at how casually Shepard was taking this.

Shepard muted her comms for a moment, "I'm letting an amazing XO do her job while I'm stuck on enforced 'bed rest'. Now quit complaining, I'm _resting_."

Joker guffawed with mirth, "Yes ma'am."

"_The mercs seem to have something of a... situation on their hands._" Kasumi's voice murmured through their comms.

"Other than us I gather." Garrus frowned, looking around with his predatory gaze for the higher ground amidst this graveyard of ships to provide sniper cover fire though it wasn't looking promising. There was plenty of high ground but the path through the ships hulls and debris was too protected for it to be of any use.

Kasumi chuckled, "_Oh yeah. Krogan's. No Blood Pack markings, no markings at all in fact."_ she mused as she spied on a group of Blue Suns trying to pin down two of the huge reptiles who were roaring at them in rage and firing rather haphazardly at the mercs but still causing major chaos.

"Are they along our route?" Miranda asked as Jacob and Massani led the way through a path littered with rubble which would make for excellent cover, both for them _and_ the mercs.

"_Yes. You'll come up behind the mercs, there's eight of them against two krogans, all humans._" Kasumi informed the operative from her stealthed position skirting around the edge of the fight.

Hearing that Shepard muted her comms to as not to distract the ground team, "EDI are there any networks you can hack?" She figured it would be prudent to find out what was going on with the mercs and krogans so they could give the ground team a heads up.

"Yes. Their communication network uses weak encryption but I cannot acquire full access to the labs." EDI informed the Commander.

"Patch us and Miranda into the communications and show me what you can get on the labs." She addressed the AI then she flicked off the mute, "Miranda, EDI's going to patch you into their comms."

Miranda glanced up at a loudspeaker that was crackling out the arrogant, belittling speech of the woman who clearly thought she was in charge of this particular Blue Suns operation. "They're broadcasting orders over loudspeakers... charming." she responded to Shepard, her tone dripping with sarcasm.

_"_Well, subtlety really isn't their strong suite. Then again... there are people on OUR squad who are hardly subtle_._" Shepard sighed, she was looking at Massani's screen that was focussed on Miranda right now. She flicked her comms to speak directly to him, "Massani aren't you supposed to be on point?"

Massani scoffed at her, "You're enjoying the view as much as I am."

"Yeah and when I say 'watch her arse' I mean 'make sure it doesn't get any bullets in it', not that she needs your covering her._.." _Shepard cleared her throat as she realized just where she'd sent their imaginations, _"_Damnit eyes forward you dirty old man_."_ Came Shepard's instant response.

Joker chuckled.

"I'd be doing you a favour, you could kiss her-" Massani was cut off by Shepard.

"As fun as that sounds you're forgetting one thing. She'd kick my arse AND yours, now move it old man or I'll beat the shit out of you when you get back here_."_ Shepard growled at him seriously.

Massani just smirked, he knew no matter how 'injured' Shepard appeared she was _always_ up for hitting something that pissed her off and she hit pretty damn hard _before_ she could plaster a krogans face out the other side of its hump. "Yes ma'am." he chuckled and got back to the mission.

Flicking her comms open to the whole team again, "EDI's hacked into some of the security system." Shepard paused as she was obviously taking it in and deciding the best way in which to share what she was seeing. "Huh. Looks like our Warlord is releasing krogan... urgh tank breds." she groaned, her thoughts immediately went to Virmire and Saren's breeding facility, along with having lost Alenko. "I suddenly have lost any residual desire I had to recruit this krogan." she sighed in dismay.

"I'm not going to bother trying to convince you of the necessity of recruiting him." Miranda took cover as they engaged the mercs from their flanks, the heavier sound of the assault rifles of Jacob and Massani joined by her lighter semi-machine pistol and the crack of Garrus's sniper echoed through the debris and hulls around them.

"I know. That person you said was broadcasting over loud speakers didn't happen to be a woman did it?" Shepard asked with unhidden resignation.

"Yes." Miranda leaned out of her cover overloading the shields of a merc which Garrus promptly shot between the eyes dropping him instantly.

"I'm betting it's Jedore, she's the commander of this particular pocket of scum. According to this it looks like she's wanting to build an army of krogan... really what is it with people these days wanting tank bred krogans? They've got the intelligence of vorcha."

"No need for the commentary, just the facts Shepard." Miranda muttered, ducking back behind her cover as a merc got a bead on her and began peppering her shields.

"O'Keer's breeding the tank breds for her but he's also the one responsible for releasing them though. No idea why he'd suddenly release them and leave them weapons to fight with, perhaps he's testing his creations, showing Jedore what she's buying, forcing her to pay more for his services..."

"Shepard." Miranda growled.

"Fine, no commentary. There's at least three dozen krogans running around with a whole heap more still in their pods. The mercs are getting them under control slowly but losing a lot of manpower in the process. The thickest fighting is to the east of your position so unless a merc calls in you're not krogans..."

"They'll just expect mindless krogans." Miranda motioned for Jacob and Massani to continue on when the last of the mercs fell.

"Exactly. EDI's also detecting at least two YMIR mechs in the labs themselves, stationed and active in the main krogan pod storage chamber."

"Is that where O'Keer is located?" Miranda asked as she jogged passed the shattered bodies of the mercs they'd just killed not even giving them a second glance, not a first one either really. Dealling with two YMIR mechs would be tricky but not impossible.

"Unsure. EDI's getting some research data but nothing more that can be helpful tactically right now." Shepard responded sounding a little distracted.

Miranda didn't ask what had Shepard's attention as if it was important Shepard would tell her once she'd figured it out. She motioned Massani forward and frowned as she noticed his lingering eyes and smirk before he moved on as ordered. Scowling she opted not to make a big deal of it as long as he obeyed orders and continued engaging the mercs effectively.

Garrus was quite impressed as Miranda guided the unique squad through the debris, rubble, mercs and krogans. He knew she was a powerful biotic from what Shepard had told him but he hadn't really had much of an opportunity to see her in action on Omega. She was damn impressive, cold, calculating and deadly in the field, while she didn't show the same kind of ruthlessness Shepard could he knew that it took something extra to push Shepard into that. Watching Miranda fight with such control of her movements and commands he wondered what it would take for her to fight in a similar state to Shepard, to show that inner ruthlessness, for he knew that beneath great control lurked something that needed to _be_ controlled.

They were currently pinned down by a seemingly continuous stream of krogans in a rather precarious position. Their course lay through the underbelly of two corroded out hulls over a chasm. The gunfire was most definitely _not_ helping to keep the area stable and sections were swinging dangerously, already a couple of hull fragments had crashed down to the depths below. Granted that was because Miranda had plastered a couple krogan through them with her biotics.

Shepard was watching on tensely, wishing she was down there with them. Her tapping on the console was starting to drive Joker mad.

"Commander I thought you were supposed to be _resting_ those dainty digits of yours not bashing the console with them." Joker teased her.

"Shut up Joker before I show you just how _dainty_ these digits can be." Shepard snapped at him, not taking her eyes off the images before her, forgetting to mute her comms.

"Anxious your princess'll get hurt without you Shepard?" Massani drawled with a smirk as he glanced over to where Miranda had taken position and was now shooting him daggers.

"Massani you know I like you but really, calling yourself a princess just does nothing for that tough masculinity of yours supposedly hiding behind that sagging old arse. Now quit leering at my XO and shoot that fucking krogan charging you." Shepard shot back at him quickly.

Massani swore as the krogan rammed straight through his cover.

Of course Miranda had seen the krogan charging but didn't warn the merc purposefully. If not even Shepard's threats were going to keep him from staring at her arse while in the line of fire then maybe a few hits from a krogan would knock some sense into him.

Massani rammed the butt of his rifle into the face of the krogan, blinding him in one eye and rolling out of its reach after receiving a decent punch to the gut from the reptilian beast. With a roar of his own he opened fire at point blank range filling its head with molten projectiles until it hit the ground very dead as a result.

"We need to get across soon or there won't be anything left to cross." Miranda growled as she watched Jacob toss a krogan over the edge with his biotics. "Jacob you and I'll take the lead, use your biotics to keep throwing them aside. Garrus, Massani hold your fire, we do any more structural damage and we'll be finding out just how deep that chasm really is." she ordered them firmly.

Shepard held her breath watching through Garrus and Massani's feeds as Miranda led the charge across unerringly, not a footstep wrong, not a biotic attack out of place. "Damn how does she do that and still look so..." Shepard began to murmur then realized she was speaking out loud and cleared her throat.

"Hot?" Garrus finished for her.

"Goddamn sexy?" Massani added, not to be left out of this particular opportunity.

"_Distracting!_" Shepard muttered in annoyance, she had so not meant to say that out loud.

"Yes you _are_ being distracting, you do have a mute _Shepard._" Miranda growled at her in annoyance, making the other side of the chasm as two more krogan rounded the corner ahead and there was nowhere to throw them. Whipping up her gun she hit one with a warp to reduce its shields and let loose a barrage of bullets to eat away at the rest of its shields.

Jacob, only a few steps behind her, opened fire on it as well to take it down quickly.

"Sometimes I _really_ wonder about that, I think it's broken." Shepard sighed, not talking about the mute for the comms at all. She'd apologize later but she did start to relax marginally as the squad crossed the chasm 'safely' and began to make their way up and towards the labs that Kasumi was currently finding a way in to.

"Your communications device is working optimally Commander Shepard." EDI informed her helpfully.

Joker, Garrus and Massani sniggered at the AI.

"Not exactly what I was referring to EDI, I meant I tend to say things before I think." Shepard mumbled, shifting uncomfortably in her chair.

"But in order to speak you must have thought..." EDI began but was quickly cut off.

"Shepard, bloody _mute_ if you plan on explaining yourself to the AI." Miranda snarled at her, not wanting to hear any more of this nonsense right now.

"I'll explain later EDI." Shepard sighed knowing that she was distracting the ground team right now when they needed to be concentrating.

Shepard was keeping a close eye on Kasumi's feed as the super sneaky thief was scouting ahead and making her way into the labs now. She'd kept rather quiet as she'd worked through the data EDI had gathered and let Miranda do her thing on the ground. Of course there'd been things she would have done differently, for instance Massani was an excellent sniper and with Garrus the pair could have picked off a lot of the mercs quickly and easily. But with Miranda in the lead, and she herself not on the ground, it had been a prudent move on Miranda's behalf to have the man where he was less likely to be distracted.

The premise for this whole interest in O'Keer was that he'd been working with the Collectors to acquire the technology to _cure_ the genophage. From what she was reading he was either completely unsuccessful or their information was wrong and he _wasn't_ trying to cure the genophage.

A blue figure on Kasumi's screen caught her attention. An asari lab technician was fearfully trying to lock down the lab... a very _familiar_ asari. But Kasumi turned so she couldn't quite see enough of the asari.

"Kasumi look back to the lab tech for me will you." Shepard asked quickly.

Kasumi said nothing but turned as ordered, speaking now would give her away.

"I know her. Damnit why do I know her?" Shepard muttered, tapping her console impatiently and scowling at the screen.

The asari turned from what she was doing and unknowingly gave Shepard a clear view of her face.

"Rana, Rana Thanoptis!" Shepard blurted victoriously and thumped her console with a smirk then scowled, "What the hell is _she_ doing here?"

"Who is she?" Joker asked curiously.

"She was a researcher on Virmire for Saren, studying the effects of indoctrination. If _she's_ here and given what the data EDI's gathered shows then O'Keer is _not_ trying to cure the genophage." Shepard shook her head. "Keep going Kasumi, I want this one alive though." she advised the woman and watched as Kasumi moved on.

Kasumi went to find a place she could access the security system that was locked out from EDI to allow the rest of the squad access as she doubted Garrus or any of the guys would be able to fit into the duct she'd used to get in here. She smirked also at the thought of Miranda trying to crawl through a duct with her figure and disposition, the image almost caused her to chuckle out loud.

Miranda had been listening to Shepard's conversation and was a little concerned, "What are you thinking he's up to then?" she asked as she shot the last merc between them and the lab's main entrance, well, _only_ entrance on this side of the ship debris.

"So _now_ you want my commentary?" Shepard's tone was flecked with mirth.

"It could assist me in how I deal with him rather than waste my time as you were doing previously." Miranda shot back at her with a slight growl.

Shepard smiled, "Well then, krogan have primary, secondary and tertiary systems. Over time their evolution has caused, in most krogan, their tertiary and even some of their secondary systems to fail especially with the introduction of the genophage. But the krogan _O'Keer's_ breeding have highly advanced biological systems, almost _all_ of their tertiary systems are fully functional. Yet they _all_ still carry the genophage. Collector technology _should_ have given him the advantage he needed to wipe out the genophage from his... tank breds but he chose _not_ to."

"It sounds as though, if not for the genophage aspect, he's trying to produce the perfect krogan." Miranda mused, a concept she was not unfamiliar with.

The words of Wrex ran through Shepard's mind as she tried to work out the krogan's reasoning. "Perhaps he _is_. Think about it, any other krogan who mated with his perfect krogan would still be infected with the genophage and therefore it would _still_ pass on to the offspring. Which means his perfect krogan would still have to have all of its systems able to tolerate the genophage without actually being affected by it."

Miranda stopped as she thought about it, "That actually makes sense."

"_Again_ with the surprise that I can have a good idea. Should I be offended Miss Lawson?" Shepard smirked, wishing one of the cameras could get a look at Miranda's face right now.

Miranda scoffed, "Seeing as you are just so full of _good ideas_ care to speculate why your acquaintance Rana is here?" she asked in a tone dripping with sarcasm.

"I don't know _exactly_ what kind of doctor she is but I assume..." Shepard's voice trailed off on a completely different tangent momentarily, "Indoctrination affects the _brain _meaning she'd have to be some kind of neurologist." she offered before Miranda could tell her to think faster but she wasn't thinking about krogan's right now.

Kasumi got the doors opened and the squad began working their way through the first room that contained a lot of bodies... krogan bodies in varying states of decay but held in horizontal pods as though to _study_ the decay.

"So perhaps she's working on the krogan's minds. Fully grown tank breds do not have the upbringing of normal krogan, meaning they would have to undergo some kind of mental imprinting to develop their minds to a mature enough state to match their physical growth." Miranda took the next logical leap that Shepard was starting to formulate, keeping her voice low in case there were more mercs or lab techs around.

Shepard nodded, more to herself obviously as Miranda couldn't see her, "Well looking at their fighting styles looks like a mental imprint's a work in progress. When you find her I want to talk with her." she smirked, "Tell her who I am and see how she responds."

Upon striding into the small room Rana was hiding in the asari cowered, hands up, "Please don't shoot, I'm-I'm not with the mercs!" she pleaded.

Miranda coolly appraised her and was not impressed with the cowardice she saw, "Working for the Blue Suns does seem a step down in comparison to Saren does it not Rana Thanoptis."

Rana's blue skin paled and her eyes widened, "How-how do you know... are you here for _me?_" she squeaked in fear.

"Hardly." Miranda scoffed and raised her wrist to activate her omni-tool, "Commander Shepard would like a word with you."

If it was possible for an asari to go white Rana came pretty damn close, "C-commander Shepard? She-she's alive?" she gulped fearfully, taking a shaking step back.

Shepard's upper body appeared holographically over Miranda's wrist and she was smirking with mirth, "Oh yes I am Rana. You know finding you in a place like this makes me have second thoughts about letting you live the last time we met. We don't want me to be thinking that do we now."

Rana backed up against an operating table, "We agree on that." she glanced around nervously.

"So what _are_ you doing here Rana?" Shepard asked with a lilting tone of voice that declared she was in control of this situation and there was nothing the asari could do about it.

Rana took a deep breath, Shepard had let her go last time even though she'd killed everyone else she'd come across and nuked the base. That meant she could be reasoned with, "I'm working with O'Keer. I created a mental template for his subjects but none of them ever completed it, he discarded them for some reason." She glanced at one of the bodies, "Look I know his methods are extreme but he's trying to help his people and he's _not_ looking for a cure to the genophage." she stood a little straighter and looked to the holographic representation of one of the most powerful people she'd ever encountered. "You gave me a second chance last time, had to outrun a nuke in a utility pod but it was a second chance. After what..." she ducked her face a little, "happened with Saren I wanted to _help_ to make a positive difference. Helping the krogan seemed like a way I could do that."

Shepard considered her long and hard.

Rana withered further under that glare.

"You truly wish to atone?" Shepard asked in a low voice.

Rana nodded, "Yes. Why else would I come to a hole like this? The view's hardly anything special." she muttered.

Shepard smiled slowly, "Not like on Virmire huh, _that_ was quite the view." It had indeed been a beautiful world, would still be so if not for the horrible memories that scarred it in Shepard's mind. "So to have studied indoctrination and have prepared a template for krogans to imprint on you'd have to have quite the education in neurology correct?"

Rana frowned a little, a sarcastic retort bitten back in the face of the heavily armed and very pissed off looking squad and Shepard's rather destructive reputation, "Yes."

Shepard leaned forward a little, "This templating, being able to imprint things into another's mind, if it can be imprinted can it be undone?"

Miranda stiffened and her blue eyes hardened into sharp spears of ice as she knew exactly what Shepard was asking about and it had nothing to do with the krogans.

Rana swallowed nervously at the human female's reaction to the question, "Uh, it depends on what you're asking. The imprints didn't take on the krogans, O'Keer pulled them off it before they could be completed."

"Shepard now is not the time for an interrogation." Miranda interrupted suddenly.

"I'm sending a shuttle to pick you up Rana, I've got some things to discuss with you." Shepard leaned forward a little, "And _don't_ try sneaking off, you do not wish to try out my patience."

"I know how you work, you're probably going to blow this place up anyway and if you're actually offering a ride out this time I'll take it." Rana responded instantly, looking almost relieved as though she'd been contemplating how to escape a nuke in this terrain.

"Good. All yours Miranda." Shepard smirked and her face vanished as she terminated the call.

"Kasumi find us a suitable landing location for the shuttle. _You_ will accompany her." Miranda coolly glared at Rana.

Rana swallowed and nodded, not about to disobey any commands from these people, the wrath of Shepard was legendary and she did _not_ want to invoke it by pissing off her people.

Striding into the lab where O'Keer was working quickly on a console attached to a rather large tank bred krogan Miranda was momentarily incensed.

"You are not Shepard, no wonder it took you so long." O'Keer's deep voice rumbled.

"You're right, I'm _not_ Shepard. If I were it would have taken _longer_ as she tends to get very _distracted._" she retorted.

Garrus cleared his throat of the chuckle that had threatened at that.

O'Keer did chuckle, "She does like to make an entrance and a fiery exit."

"You were expecting us?" Miranda didn't deign to respond to the comment as it was quite an accurate description of Shepard's usual MO.

"Yes. Some fool calling himself the Illusive Man contacted me and warned me of her coming and that she has an offer of some kind for me. Why is she not here?" Now he turned to look at the human female.

"She recently punched the face of a krogan warlord out the back of his hump for pissing her off, her hand is still healing and unlike krogan's we humans don't regenerate as quickly. You can speak with her face to face on the Normandy." Miranda looked to him expectantly.

"Well sounds better than 'she got her arse whipped by a punching bag'." Shepard sighed.

Miranda pursed her lips but made no response as the krogan was laughing at the moment.

"After what she did to Saren, that is hardly surprising. But I go nowhere without my prototype." he became serious once more and gestured to the tank bred.

Miranda put her hand on her hip and shifted her body position slightly, for a human male she would have become seductive but for a krogan it was dominating power and strength they respected, both of which she exuded now. "You seem quick to throw aside the others, what makes this one different?"

"He is perfect, through him I have given the genophage the greatest insult that can be suffered." His eyes lit up and his tone became passionate, which was quite surprising for a krogan as no one had ever seen a krogan get passionate about anything other than battle. "To be ignored."

"Huh." Shepard sat up a little at that, they hadn't quite anticipated that particular reasoning though she should have in retrospect.

Before any more could be said another voice boomed around them.

"It was _you_ who released the krogans! You will pay for your betrayal O'Keer!" Jedore yelled in fury.

Pipes began to clank then a hissing sound filled the air.

"No! She will destroy my prototype!" O'Keer turned back to his precious tank bred, "You must stop her. I will come with you so long as Shepard takes my prototype. She will understand. She is krogan in heart."

"Kill the bitch." Shepard growled to Miranda, she _did_ understand, "EDI see if you can find a way to hack into that system and shut off whatever it is Jedore's doing."

"Where is she?" Miranda asked O'Keer, she'd planned on doing just as Shepard had ordered as her omni-tool registered it was a toxic gas being released.

"Through that door go down a level, she's in the main storage facility." O'Keer nodded to the window along the right wall that no one had bothered looking out of as O'Keer had been their target.

Miranda didn't need to say anything as she jogged quickly to the door opposite to where they'd entered.

Garrus took a moment to look out the window and clenched his mandibles at the rows upon rows of krogan tank breds just waiting to be brought out of stasis along with the two YMIR mechs their scans had picked up.

Shepard took note of what Garrus was seeing, "You want to tell her or shall I Garrus?" her friend had been unusually quiet without her physically present to banter with.

"Lots of stasis pods and the two mechs down there." Garrus informed Miranda, quickly jogging after her, not aware that the communication from Shepard had been private.

"I figured she was holding the mechs at her position." Miranda acknowledged, not slowing down her approach. "Garrus deal with Jedore, Massani any krogan she releases, Jacob you and I'll handle the mechs." she ordered them quickly and concisely.

Rushing through the door to the storage facility they found themselves on a platform lined with pods they quickly took cover behind as the mechs and a couple of krogans Jedore had already released opened fire on them.

"These krogan are _mine!_ You will pay for your interference with your _lives!_" Jedore yelled at them from a platform on the opposite side of the room where she was doing something on a console.

"I think she's talked enough." Miranda looked to Garrus pointedly.

He nodded, sniper already in hand and lining up a shot.

Jacob had moved further along the platform to engage the closer mech while Massani had positioned himself above the access ramp the krogan would be charging up to reach them.

Shepard again watched anxiously, they _needed_ her down there and she was stuck up here because she'd lost her temper and almost ruined her hands. She wasn't aware of the dull ache developing in her hand from constantly tapping her fingertips firmly on the console.

Joker didn't dare say anything to her but muttered under his breath which was completely ignored by the Commander, ignored or just unheard he couldn't decide.

Miranda overloaded the shields of the first mech then warped its armour making it a more vulnerable target for Jacob's assault rifle.

Garrus dropped the shields of Jedore but she quickly took cover before he could fire the kill shot.

Massani growled as he unleashed a torrent of gunfire on an advancing krogan that having only just been brought out of stasis had no armour or weapons and was charging blindly to its death but was closely followed by another. He had to quickly fall back as the second krogan bellowed and crouched ready to charge him in uncontrolled blood rage.

Miranda looked up from her cover sharply as Massani was backpedalling quickly behind her.

"Miranda don't move!" Shepard warned her, while in blood rage the krogan would only focus on what it thought was a threat and crouched down low as she was Miranda wouldn't be taken for a threat if she did nothing to gain its attention.

Miranda waited and watched as a krogan raced passed her, completely ignoring her, orange blood spurting from the bullet wounds Massani was inflicting upon it as he raced for cover.

From Garrus's viewpoint Shepard saw the second mech lumbering towards the platform with its rocket launcher raised in Miranda's general direction, "Miri rocket!" she warned, her tone strained with being unable to do more.

Miranda strengthened her biotic shields and flattened against the pod which shortly shook with the impact of two rockets.

Another explosion rocked the central area as Jacob finished off the first mech.

"Huh eat that!" Jacob grinned in triumph and turned his attention to the next mech only to notice Jedore lining up a rocket launcher on him, "Shit!" he dove out the way but not quick enough to avoid all of the heat from the rocket.

"Garrus kill her already!" Miranda snapped at the turian.

"Can't get a clear shot of her from here, finding a better position keep her occupied." Garrus returned sharply, moving down the ramp to try and sneak up onto Jedore's platform without being seen.

"No problem there." Jacob muttered, shaking his head a little at the spots that were dancing across his vision.

"Commander I cannot access the lab's systems. O'Keer's life signs are failing." EDI advised, sounding concerned that she had failed in doing what she was tasked with.

"Closed system right, typical old school, matches in with broadcasting orders over loud speaker." Shepard muttered, clenching her fists and almost thumping the console if it wasn't for the twinge of pain that forced her to remember why she was sitting up here and not down there. "Kasumi, we're losing O'Keer, can you access their security and vent the room of toxic fumes?"

"On it." Kasumi acknowledged, the shuttle was on approach now as she'd found a nice clear spot up on the roof, or rather the outer hull of the ship the Blue Suns had set up in.

Garrus got into position with a clear line of sight on Jedore but if he didn't get her in one hit she'd just change cover before the second shot could be fired. "Miranda can you take out her shields?" he murmured.

Miranda quickly retargeted her omni-tool, "Ready."

"Now." Garrus murmured, his sights lined up on Jedore's blonde head and anticipating that as soon as Miranda hit her shields she'd duck behind her cover which would still leave her perfectly open for his shot.

Jedore's shields flashed out of existence and she cursed, dropping back down quickly before she could take another shot at the dark skinned man who was making a mess of her mech. Less than a second later her head snapped to the side and she hit the deck with a sniper bullet through her brain.

Massani dropped a fourth unarmoured and unarmed krogan, the last one that had been released, and turned his attention to the last threat in the room.

"Miranda leave the mech to the boys, Kasumi's managed to get the lab venting but O'Keer's not going to make it if you don't get there now." Shepard warned though she doubted Miranda would be able to save him now.

"Damnit." Miranda hissed and shot to her feet, sprinting back up to the lab. By the time she got into the lab O'Keer was slumped on the floor, a message playing on the console.

"_I don't know what the Collectors want with Humans. Everything I traded with them is in my prototype. This one grunt. My legacy. Pure..."_ his image wheezed and he began to hack up his lungs, falling to the floor into the position his body was now in.

"O'Keer's a no go." Miranda reported with a sigh, there was nothing she could do for him now, "What do you want me to do about the prototype? It would be excellent for study." Miranda suggested but this wasn't her call to make.

"Bring him. Might as well get _something _out of this." Shepard would wait until she saw the tank bred herself before deciding if she'd hand it over to Cerberus scientists or not.

When the guys were done finishing off the mech they loaded the large stasis pod onto the shuttle, Massani grumbling most of the way.

Miranda glared at Rana the entire way up to the Normandy and said nothing to her. She'd be having words with Shepard over this, she wasn't about to let an asari poke about in her brain, she didn't _need_ help to figure this out.

* * *

><p><em>So merry Christmas, Happy New Years or whatever festive occassion you celebrate this time of year.<em>

_There may be some typo's as I may not have read through it all properly, must confess got a little blocked with writing this chapter. I wanted to show a couple snapshots of Miri in battle but couldn't visualize them until today and you've been waiting over a week now which wasn't intended, sorry!_

_No teasers today about what could come next as I haven't decided which scene to put up next. You'll just have to wait in eager anticipation! At least I hope it will be eager anticipation ;)_

_Love the reviews! :D_


	23. Professional Distance

Shepard was waiting for the shuttle in the cargo hold with Kelly, who was going to keep Rana occupied while she talked with Miranda. She'd ask her for her thoughts first in potentially including the asari in helping Miranda figure out what was wrong as it was her brain after all. The squad disembarked, Jacob saluting her as he passed, Rana looked very nervous as was expected. What was not expected was the angry glare from Miranda who stalked passed her wordlessly.

"What did you do today Shep?" Kasumi quipped with a grin having seen the icy lack of exchange from the Cerberus XO.

"I'll find out when she kicks my arse next seeing as I'm banned from using my fists." Shepard sighed and turned to Rana, "Welcome aboard the Normandy, Rana."

Rana had forgotten that she was taller than Shepard and it came as a surprise to be reminded as Shepard just seemed so larger than life in her memories. She nodded at the greeting, "So am I a prisoner of war or something?" she demanded far less forcefully than she'd hoped to convey, she was far to well practiced at being meek in the face of someone who held her life in their hands.

"Not at all Rana." Shepard assured her with a smile, "I've never considered you an enemy, I thought letting you go on Virmire proved that considering how many others I _did_ kill on that goddess forsaken rock." she growled and glanced away as the memories surged, of Kaiden telling her to go save Ash.

Rana relaxed a little, "So why am I here then?"

"I've some questions I want to ask you concerning neurology." Shepard shrugged slightly and returned her gaze to meet the asari's blue eyes.

Rana considered her thoughtfully, "Ah someone you know has been 'imprinted' with something and you want to know if I can remove it." she recalled the question the Commander had asked her earlier.

"I'm not entirely sure what's been done to them but someone's messed with their brain. I need to discuss with them if they'd be willing to accept your assistance, that's if you'd be willing to give it. I'm not in the habit of forcing people to work for me. For now this is Kelly, she'll show you around. I have an XO to debrief." Shepard began to turn.

Kasumi burst out laughing and Kelly could barely keep her own smile at bay.

Shepard frowned slightly as she thought about what she'd said and what was to funny about it. She scowled, "So _not_ what I meant. What is it with you people?" she muttered, her cheeks slightly pinker before she walked away quickly.

Rana was plainly confused.

Shepard entered the communications/briefing room to find Miranda pacing and arguing with Jacob already.

"Bringing the krogan aboard to study makes sense but waking it is a risk we cannot afford to take." she asserted with frustration.

"So you've said, _several_ times already, but it's not up to you Miranda." Jacob was leaning back against the wall with his arms crossed until then and he nodded to the Commander as he straightened to attention.

Miranda glared at Shepard wordlessly though she did stop pacing.

Shepard strode around to the head of the holographic display, flicking it off as she did then looking back to her team, "On the whole the mission went rather well in regards to team work and leadership, as expected." she nodded to Miranda.

Miranda's glare didn't waiver, "Would have been smoother if _someone_ could keep their comments to themself."

"I'll add it to the list of things I need to apologize for then." Shepard shot back quickly, "It seems to be growing daily."

Miranda scoffed but said nothing more.

"Besides it didn't affect mission and you're too professional to let a simple comment or two admiring your grace on the battlefield distract you." Shepard inserted smoothly and watched as Miranda's eyes narrowed at what she was insinuating, that right now Miranda was being unprofessional in her response.

Massani smirked but didn't dare chuckle as with the tension in the room he'd likely get his arse kicked by _both_ women.

"Can't say I'm disappointed about not getting O'Keer. Miranda clearly wants to pass on the prototype to Cerberus scientists but we could always use a heavy hitter." Shepard looked to Garrus for his opinion.

"You mean other than you?" Garrus grinned to her, his mandibles clicking in mirth.

"We don't even know if it's mentally stable. The other krogan we encountered clearly weren't." Miranda interjected heatedly.

"This one was _clearly_ different if O'Keer gave his life to preserve it. Beside's we happen to have someone aboard who can help us in that regard." Shepard reminded her.

"Oh yes, Rana Thanoptis. You do recall she informed you that none of the krogan passed her little imprinting process." Miranda seethed at the mention of the asari's name.

"Because O'Keer pulled them before they could complete it. I assume they weren't genetically perfect according to his standards so he discarded them. I'm sure _you_ can relate, Miss _Lawson_." Shepard knew it was a low blow but it was a logical conclusion.

Miranda stiffened and looked as though she'd just been slapped. She knew very well what it was like for someone to be reaching for perfection and discarding those that came before for being flawed.

"I'll discuss the krogan's mental viability with Rana, pending that discussion I'll decide if I want to wake him or send him off to be studied like a lab rat just because he was _engineered to be perfect._" Shepard clearly enunciated her last words, making a crystal clear point to Miranda.

Miranda was furious to say the least as she stormed out, balling her fists to contain her biotics before they flared.

"Well other than pissing Miranda off yet again, job well done guys. Dismissed." Shepard nodded to them calmly.

While the others filed out Garrus remained behind again, "What was _that_ about?" he asked softly.

Shepard sighed and rubbed her neck, "Something that will most likely get me plastered against the hull." she groaned, "Aside from that Miranda is... unique. The only difference between her and our new guest in stasis is their race. Just like the krogan was engineered to be perfect by O'Keer she was engineered to be the perfect woman by her 'father'. To put it very crudely she is a tank bred like the krogan."

Garrus was floored to say the least, "Now I would _never_ have picked that."

"Exactly my point, Garrus." Shepard looked up at him with a fire in her eyes, "She is a sentient, highly intelligent human being in every way. Her origins do not demean who she is or what she can accomplish. Who are we to judge this krogan for having a similar origin? If he _is_ mentally stable then he is a sentient being who has the _right_ to make his way in the universe, to learn, to grow, to _live_ like a krogan and not a toy for scientists. And I'll explain that to Miranda in better terms when she's cooled down... or assaults me in my quarters, whichever comes first." Shepard waved her hand dismissively as she made her way to the door.

Garrus smirked, "You really do manage to piss her off quite frequently."

"Oh you're not kidding. I can't go two days without saying _something_ wrong to that woman." she moaned in dismay.

Garrus chuckled and headed left to stow away his weapons.

Shepard took a quick detour before heading up to her loft. Bracing herself mentally she strode into her private domain with two cups of vanilla iced tea, sincerely hoping it wouldn't cause an episode in Miranda but knowing that she loved the stuff, sophisticated and sweet was what Miri had called the drink when they were teens.

Miranda stood at the top of the steps that lead down to the lower living area with her arms crossed, eyes narrowed and lips pursed radiating great displeasure.

Shepard sighed and walked over to her console, putting down both drinks before standing before Miranda and offering her cheek, "Come on then, hit me with it."

Miranda scoffed, "Unlike you I don't need to _hit_ things to feel better."

"Oh but it helps, come on, let me have it I can handle it." she tapped her cheek, fighting her smirk.

Miranda rolled her eyes, "I don't even know where to _begin_ with you." she growled, not taking Shepard up on her _generous_ offer, though she was sorely tempted to.

"How about a drink then while you decide." Shepard retrieved the cups and held one out to Miranda.

Miranda made no move to accept it.

"Vanilla iced tea." Shepard grinned.

Miranda's eyes widened, "How..." then she huffed and accepted it, another reminder that Shepard knew her from the past.

Shepard softened, "I'm not going to apologize for thinking you're beautiful but I do apologize for my inappropriate timing." she offered as Miranda took the drink from her. She braced herself again, "And I'm also not going to apologize for what I said. I _want _you to take your own origins into consideration here."

"They've got _nothing_ to do with this krogan." Miranda snapped at her, her momentary shiver at Shepard calling her beautiful gone before she could even process it.

"I beg to differ Miranda. You were engineered to be perfect just like this krogan. You were created for a purpose that you rebelled against and are now living a life you've _chosen_ to lead. Should we deny this krogan that same right to chose, to _live,_ if he proves to be mentally stable?" she asked softly, trying to appeal to Miranda's conscience and not just her cold, hard factual side.

At that Miranda was actually torn. How could she argue against that?

"Let me talk with Rana, find out what he was imprinted with and if he's stable enough to wake. I have _never_ seen you as anything less because of how you came to be. I see you for who you are, Miri, who you _chose_ to be and no I don't like all your choices but they are part of a bigger picture and there are things that I deeply admire and respect about you." Shepard cocked her head slightly, "You're not perfect to me,"

Miranda scowled.

"but I never was so hung up on perfection, perfection changes depending on who's opinion you ask." Shepard smiled, "But I _do_ think you're pretty amazing and I value your opinion and your company." she gestured to the lounge, inviting Miranda to have a seat.

Miranda glanced at the lounge, much of her initial anger had abated but she was still annoyed. Surprisingly she didn't quite know what to think of the fact that Shepard didn't see her as perfect. Should she be offended or relieved? Perhaps right now wasn't the time to figure it out. Sitting down as requested she sipped her tea and found it to be quite refreshing. It had been a long time since she'd indulged in the drink and now she wondered why.

Shepard optimistically hoped that she'd settled Miranda but would hold back on her inner applause until Miranda acceded she had a point or needed more convincing. Sitting down diagonally opposite Miranda she assumed a similar position as last time they'd shared a drink, feet up on the lounge and relaxing back into the head rest.

There was a few minutes of silence between them, Miranda collecting her thoughts and Shepard waiting patiently to hear them.

Finally Miranda looked over to Shepard who had her eyes closed and looked somewhat peaceful. "I can hardly hold your view of genetically engineered beings against you and I... I understand your point of view. If I can become my own person there is a chance that this krogan can as well. But only if Rana can clear his mental stability." she reasoned.

Shepard nodded, "That's the plan. You know I don't generally think much of tank bred krogans because none I've encountered so far have had a free will of their own. But if Rana can confirm this one's stable I'll give it a chance."

"But it wasn't why you brought her on board is it." Miranda got to the main reason she was angry with Shepard.

"No." Shepard looked over to her now and met her cobalt blue gaze, "I don't have the... education to help you but by the goddess _anything_ I can do to help I'll do it." she declared fervently.

Miranda's chest tightened at the heartfelt sentiment pouring through those incredible amber eyes and suddenly her anger with Shepard melted away. It wasn't that Shepard didn't think her capable of figuring this out, it was that Shepard herself felt powerless to help yet desperately wanted to.

"If Rana's background in neurology can give you a platform to work from use it. She might not be well versed in human brain chemistry but between studying indoctrination and creating mental imprints she has an understanding of how the mind can be manipulated." Shepard felt her heart break a little at the wince in Miranda at that last word. "I... sorry I don't know what else to call it." she murmured, turning her gaze to the drink in her hands.

"It's not... it's just that you're right. My mind has been manipulated and I have no idea of who or how they could have accomplished it. I have no memory of being in a position where it could have even been possible." Miranda shook her head slightly, "You know so much about me, who I was, but I _can't_ remember you and I can't even risk thinking about it, about why you care so much..." she couldn't finish the sentence, her voice trailing off softly.

Shepard got up and put aside her drink, sitting down next to Miranda and gently taking her free hand in both of hers, not meeting Miranda's questioning gaze. "Why does anyone care about anything?" she asked softly, not waiting for Miranda to respond she answered the question herself, "Because they see something worthy to care about." She slid her fingers between Miranda's and clasped their hands together. Leaning forward she gently pressed her forehead against Miranda's and whispered, "_You're_ worth caring about."

Miranda closed her eyes, tears threatening at the swirl of emotions that began to build up within her at the genuine sincerity and heartfelt tenderness in Shepard towards her.

"And I'm sorry I keep saying the wrong things and making you angry..." she was stopped by a fingertip pressed to her lips.

"Well your timing could improve, but you're doing better than you think." Miranda murmured to her, smiling as Shepard pulled back to look at her.

Shepard smiled shyly and blushed, not sure what to say so saying nothing.

"I have to admit I _was_ angry with you about bringing Rana aboard. You thinking I needed help felt as though you thought I couldn't figure it out by myself." Miranda admitted softly.

Shepard frowned, "But that's not..."

Miranda smiled and squeezed her hand gently, aware that her hands would still be tender, "I know that now. You want to help but feel unable to."

Shepard sat back but didn't release Miranda's hand, "I feel bloody useless. I'm a marine, I _shoot_ things, point me at a hostile and it's history. But this... I don't know _how_ to help and I'm the cause of hurting you if I..." she swallowed the hard lump in her throat, turning her face away from Miranda.

"It's not your fault." Miranda asserted quickly, then she changed the subject, "How are your hands?" she asked softly, rubbing her thumb in small circles over the first knuckle on Shepard's hand clasped in hers.

Shepard looked to them in frustration, though she was tingling a little at Miranda's touch, "Probably as pissed off at me as I am at them." she growled.

Miranda smiled at that, "So we won't be taking out our anger on punching bags in the near future?"

"Chakwas has banned me from it so no." Shepard sighed in dismay at the thought.

"Good, I was going to have it removed but banning you will require you to use some self control in restraining yourself." Miranda nodded in approval.

Shepard huffed, "You know my self control is pretty good most of the time."

Miranda raised her brow in a questioning expression of 'oh really'.

"I said _most_ of the time. It's only when I get _really_ angry that I lose it and then if there's no one around that deserves killing I _restrain _myself to the punching bag and not beating up innocent people. That's got to count for something right?" she muttered, scowling at the table now.

"So what had you so angry that you couldn't feel what you were doing to yourself?" Miranda asked softly.

Shepard closed her eyes and bowed her head, "The realization that someone had purposefully messed with your brain so you can't remember me. At first I thought it was your father, I mean he _did_ try to have me killed after all. That punching bag had his face on it."

Miranda was shocked at that revelation, "But you don't think that anymore?"

"When I ask you who I am you don't just tell me my name, you pretty much give me my resume. It's like what we're trained to do if captured by enemy forces and interrogated, name, rank and serial number. For you it's like a trained response, one you don't think about it just comes out. That means whoever did this to you did it _after_ I became a Spectre and saved the Citadel which pretty much rules out your father if I'm not mistaken." Shepard took a deep breath, "So then I thought it was Cerberus, but not even the Illusive Man would be stupid enough to do something like this when we're working together and I could give you an aneurism if I remind you too much of who I really am. That could seriously jeopardize our mission after all and with everything that he's _invested_ he'd be a bloody fool to do this to you."

Miranda nodded slowly to herself, "So it's been within the last four years and though the possibility of it occurring on Lazarus Station is small, which would rule out two years, I'm reluctant to do so given I have no memory of how it could have happened."

"If it happened on Lazarus you should be able to access the records right?" Shepard looked to her, a touch hopefully. The hope was short lived when Miranda shook her head.

"The station was scuttled after Wilson's betrayal meant the facility was compromised. The data there was too sensitive to risk falling into the wrong hands." Miranda mentally cursed herself for ordering that so quickly.

"Wouldn't want people just bringing _any _old riffraff back to life now do we." Shepard gave a rueful smirk.

"You're hardly riffraff Shepard." Miranda scolded lightly, "I only work on the best."

Shepard smiled and her cheeks coloured a little, "So I'm the best am I?"

"Well you _are_ the first human Spectre, saviour of the Citadel, hero of Elysium..." Miranda began to recite and smirked at the scowl that crossed Shepard's features.

"That's not funny." Shepard pouted, pulling her hand away from Miranda's and glaring at her iced tea.

Miranda smiled and slid her hand over Shepard's thigh, feeling her warmth and strength through her light shipboard trackies.

Shepard stiffened at the touch and looked down at Miranda's hand in surprise, her heart beating a little faster.

Both of them jumped slightly at the masculine voice that interrupted, "Hey Commander, I've got some stick up his arse turian demanding to speak with you." Joker informed her sounding annoyed.

"Bloody hell Joker." Shepard growled to herself, standing up quickly, "I'll take it in the loft."

Miranda rose more sedately and looked over to Shepard, "I'll be in my office, I'd like to do some background research on Rana for myself before I involve her."

Shepard nodded, "Yeah, she might actually suck at her job hence she works for despicable people on their devious plans." she smirked.

Miranda hesitated for a moment, unsure what to think of that.

"It was a joke, unless you really think I'm despicable and have a devious plan in..." she stopped and cleared her throat, "So that wasn't as funny as I thought it would be, never mind. Talk to you later Miri." she finished in a mumbled an sat down at her console.

Miranda smiled faintly and strode confidently out of the loft. It was starting to become a little harder to remind herself to keep a professional distance from Shepard. Shepard wasn't at all like she'd imagined she would be and there had been no way to know, given the mental block in her memory, that they had known each other previously. That Shepard truly cared for her. She clenched her jaw and purposefully thought of something else before that thought could go any further. Where to start digging up information about Rana...

* * *

><p><em>So I would have posted a second chapter up tonight but then I realized I'd forgotten to have a chat with Rana and wake up Grunt. But I got Jack's pick up all ready and waiting for you all! It's... different. That's all I'm saying about it. ;)<em>

_Also I had pictured Shep and Miri having a fiery exchange but I thought it was about time to show that they can have a reasonable discussion without resorting to name calling and hair pulling... not that they would _ever_ demean themselves in such a way. ;) Besides, given how much Shep wants Miri to get her memory sorted out it made sense that she'd be less fired up in her responses towards Miri... at least it does to me, and Miri is not some childish precocious princess, sure she has her pride (which Shep hit with asking Rana aboard with no warning to Miri) and doesn't appreciate much nonesense (Much of the party banter centered around her looks previously) but she's also intelligent and reasonable when given a reasonable explanation._

_Oh I also picked up a few cringeworthy typos in the previous chapter in case anyone was fuming over them. _

_Reviews always appreciated. You never know if I might add in an idea of yours if it fits in with what I have in mind ) Though I will say there may be some unhappy campers with something I have planned... hopefully you'll understand why when the time comes._

_Goodnight! :D_


	24. So close

_So I feel I must point out to the unnamed reviewer who is irked by Seph's language that Seph is not a canon Bioware Shepard. I'm glad you're enjoying the story but you will continue to be irked as Seph grew up with Miri in Sydney Australia before she fled with her mum to Mindoir if you happened to miss that little point, meaning she does speak more like Miranda who does use the words 'bloody' and 'arse' and she bloody well doesn't have to explain her arse to anyone so why should Seph ;) he he he. Guess tis just a case of expecting to hear language you're used to, sorry if the language offends but being an Aussie myself I'm kind of used to it so it's not offensive to me personally. You may have noticed Seph swore a lot more in the beginning but has calmed down a little in that regard. Jack will influence that again but it was reduced to show that Shepard was hurting, lost and angry with the universe... especially Miri, when she first woke up but she's calming down now she's settling into the mission. That said there are still a few bumps along the road yet._

_Now on with the story! Hope you enjoy. :D_

* * *

><p>Shepard was <em>not<em> impressed. The stick up his arse turian turned out to be one Warden Kurill, a barefaced Blue Suns Commander who ran the prison ship Purgatory. Purgatory happened to be the location of one Subject Zero, also known as Jack, who was a powerful biotic and apparently had one hell of an attitude if their rap sheet was anything to go by. Kurill wanted Jack off his ship ASAP and had the gall to _charge_ _extra_ for every day he continued to contain her from today. She would have been tempted to let him stew but the longer he waited the more he was _better off_. She was going to give the bastard a piece of her mind when they got there.

Kelly was a little wary of asking what was wrong as Shepard _punched_ in the coordinates muttering about _bloody turian bastards_ under her breath as she did so. She didn't dare point out that Shepard had a couple new messages right now as the angry Commander stormed back to the elevator. Kasumi had taken Rana off her hands for the time being so she could get some work done.

The crew that were in the mess couldn't help but notice the angry aura surrounding Shepard as she stormed towards Miranda's office and they all wondered what the XO had done now. Some of them were even eager for another show down between the fiery women.

Rana glanced at Kasumi nervously, "Does she get mad often?"

"Oh it's usually for a good reason. Apparently Miss Lawson tends to cop a fair share of her ire then again Shep brings out the wrath of Miranda fairly equally. You _don't_ want to get between those two in an argument." Kasumi grinned at the anxious asari.

Miranda glanced up as Shepard stalked into her quarters. Shepard was mad. Question was what about. Had she done anything recently to piss her off? No, it had something to do with that call. "Commander." she nodded to her.

Shepard stood in front of Miranda's console for a moment before taking a deep breath and speaking surprisingly softly given her demeanour, "We've had to change course to pick up Jack. Warden Kurill decided he wanted Jack off his station as quickly as possible and figured charging an extra five thousand credits per day Jack remains in his custody would do the trick."

Miranda nodded slowly and looked to her console, bringing up the course alteration and timing, "It will only add a couple days to get to Illium and if not for our current situation I would have suggested stopping there before heading to Illium any way as it is closer." she offered.

Shepard's steam deflated a little, "Really?" she asked in surprise.

Miranda looked up at her, "Yes."

"You're really okay with delaying..." Shepard frowned, quite shocked at that frankly.

"I won't say I'm not concerned, but I understand. I'd rather not give more to that thieving scum than required." Miranda growled assertively.

"Huh." Shepard calmed considerably, "Well then when we get there I want you to come with me to sort out the finances. Jack's a little out of my expenditure account." she grinned.

Miranda nodded and returned the smile, "Just a little."

The crew were a touch let down that there'd been no fireworks when Shepard emerged a short time later much calmer than she'd been upon entry. She hadn't been in there long enough for anything juicy to happen either so they went back to their duties or meals like nothing had happened, because nothing really had.

Glancing around the mess Rana was easy to spot being the only asari on board. Heading over to her Shepard took a seat opposite her.

"So what was that about?" Kasumi asked curiously.

"What was what about?" Shepard feigned ignorance.

"You looked ready to deck Miss Lawson just then." Kasumi nodded towards the door, watching Shepard's reactions closely.

"Not Miranda, a certain turian who thinks he can extort more money out of me and who's going to end up with my boot up his arse if he doesn't change his tune when we get to Purgatory." Shepard growled.

"Purgatory? That sounds... interesting." Kasumi's wild imagination was running rampant right now.

"It's a prison ship. Our next specialist happens to be a crazy biotic badass with a rap sheet just about as long as my service record. The Illusive Man thinks I can keep this Jack under control." Shepard groaned, "I'm gonna have to be a mean bitch to keep someone like _that_ under control or at least killing the people I need killed."

Rana swallowed nervously at that.

"Great inspiration there Shep, I feel all warm and fuzzy." Kasumi drawled.

"Hey, I can be mean and intimidating, can't I Rana." Shepard smirked at the asari.

"Oh yes absolutely." Rana nodded with a little too much enthusiasm.

Kasumi laughed though she knew it was true, Shepard _did_ have the reputation for it when required and if you were batarian, Omega had certainly proven that.

"I wanted to talk to you about the krogan we recovered. O'Keer died protecting this one, said it was perfect and pure, his legacy." Shepard became serious and looked to Rana.

Rana shifted mindsets and nodded, "I'll tell you what I can but he was different about that one, I didn't actually get to work on it personally he did everything himself."

Shepard frowned, "Damn, I was hoping you'd be able to tell me if he was mentally stable."

"I might leave you two to chat, I've got some research to check up on." Kasumi wasn't overly interested in this particular turn in conversation.

"Sure, just don't get into any trouble or get _me_ into any trouble." Shepard clarified with a stern expression.

Kasumi held up her hands submissively, "Would I do that?"

Shepard didn't respond verbally but her expression said 'hell yes'.

Kasumi sighed, "Fine I would but not this time I promise!" she grinned and dashed away.

Shepard rolled her eyes and sighed, "Okay so talk to me about this imprinting, assuming O'Keer ran it on his prototype personally and it was completed."

This was a topic Rana was clearly well versed in as she'd written the template for imprinting so she launched into it with confidence and depth, surprised that Shepard was able to keep up with her as she did.

While Shepard sat with Rana in the mess Miranda ran a background check on the asari not far away. What she found was decidedly interesting. Rana was five hundred and seventeen years old, had studied at the highly prestigious Academy of Athame on Thessia for two hundred _years_ after she'd settled down from a rather tame maidenhood shaking her arse in clubs from place to place rather than joining a merc band like Eclipse. Miranda had already seen Rana was a coward when it came to armed individuals so that made sense. But coward or not Rana had definitely applied herself to studies, neurology, bio-chemistry, behavioural psychology all across species, asari, turian, salarian, krogan, volus and even elcor. It was no wonder that Saren had sought her out to study indoctrination and O'Keer to work on the minds of his prototypes, she certainly was qualified. Perhaps Shepard _did_ have the right idea. She herself had an extensive knowledge base for the human brain from having to put Shepard's back together and Rana could prove to be quite useful to her. Not just for her own issues but for the fight against the Reapers as well, they would need every scrap of information they could gather on indoctrination as it was a major threat the Reapers _would_ use against them.

The only issue Miranda could have had with Rana's resume was that she'd worked for the likes of Saren and O'Keer. However, given that Miranda was _Cerberus_ and the things she had done for Cerberus in the name of advancement of the human race such previous employer issues were not really of any concern to her. Rana's rather interesting morals could even prove to be quite beneficial.

xxx

It had taken all week for Kasumi to track down that Miranda's girl was Persephone Eve Calleyuss. She found a bunch of images and surveillance vids of the two girls together and it was so odd seeing Miranda Lawson, the frighteningly icy and all business operative, as a smiling, happy teenager. Persephone was a cutie too, a few years younger than Miranda, Kasumi grinned at that, Lawson had been a cradle snatcher! Watching the vids showed that 'Miri' had been adorably protective over 'little' Seph, who was a petite bundle of energy, and Seph was a playful free spirit that brought the older girl out of her high and mighty upbringing and down to earth. Seph was the fun Miri wasn't supposed to have. Which was why daddy dearest had gotten rid of the girl and her family presumably.

Bringing up an image of Persephone grinning up at the camera she couldn't help but feel that there was something familiar about her. Not able to put her finger on it just yet she looked over her information. Persephone had vanished July 2169. 2169 why was that number ringing bells? Kasumi stuck her tongue out the corner of her mouth as this puzzle was getting interesting. Especially since she had a face to go with the name.

Before accepting the Illusive Man's offer to join the crew of the Normandy she had done her research about Commander Shepard. 2169 stuck out because it was the year the files about _Shepard_ began... when she was sixteen. That had been odd to Kasumi, Shepard had nothing before that time. Persephone was sixteen when she disappeared.

Kasumi's eyes widened and she brought up an image of Shepard at sixteen. Her jaw dropped open and her hands fell to her sides at what was on her screen.

Stephanie Shepard _was_ Persephone Calleyuss!

Stephanie Shepard _was_ Miranda Lawson's, or rather Solheim's, first love!

Miranda had _no idea_ that Stephanie was Persephone!

No wonder Shepard had been so coy when they'd had drinks with Kelly in the loft.

Kasumi burst out laughing as the drama played out in her mind. Oh she _had_ to find Shep right now!

xxx

Shepard was currently standing over, or rather _on,_ a semi-unconscious newly dubbed Grunt. "Satisfied Grunt?" She growled at him confidently.

He grunted as his vision was still blurry, his head was pounding and he couldn't quite understand how the little human female had ended up with one foot on his chest and grinning down at him.

As soon as the krogan had awakened and looked up from the floor once his vision had cleared and his mind groggily started functioning he had charged the first thing he'd seen.

Commander Shepard.

Shepard had braced herself and let the newly 'born' krogan slam her into the bulkhead, preparing to defend herself from a lethal attack but willing to suck it up and give the boy the chance to actually see his surroundings.

Rana had ducked behind cover and out of sight, all the krogans had emerged from the pods in a similar manner until their minds had cleared properly.

"_Hmm human. Female. Before you die I need a name."_ He'd growled at her.

"_My name's Commander Shepard and you, whelp, had best put me down before I throw your heavy arse on the ground."_ She'd snarled at him knowing that what O'Keer had programmed into his brain was the epitome of what made a krogan, krogan as prepared by an asari... so didn't make sense to her personally. Strength of leadership demonstrated through force and brutality was what the krogan would respect.

"_Not your name. Mine. I'm trained. I know things, but the tank... O'keer couldn't implant connection. His words are hollow._" He responded gruffly, ignoring her order. "_Pure. Legacy. Grunt... Grunt was among the last. It has no meaning, it'll do._" He was momentarily distracted but his arm against her chest didn't slacken. He'd looked back at her"_If you are worthy of your command prove it by trying to destroy me._"

Shepard had smirked, "_You're on tough guy._"

With that she'd thrown him with a biotic surge into the plasteel plated glass overlooking the cargo hold. She'd rushed in and sent him flying again with a powerful right hook to which he'd landed on his hands and knees and she wouldn't be telling Chakwas about. Then she'd kicked his arse, literally, sending him head first into the wall so hard it had dented. Rolling him over she was now victoriously pinning him down.

Instead of being angry like she'd suspected he chuckled.

"Nothing in the tank imprints suggested humans were so strong and could be so... forceful. You are strong, Shepard, I will follow you." he nodded.

"Good." She stepped back and didn't offer a hand to help him up but rather watched.

Grunt got up easily, he was still wet from the tank fluids but he didn't seem to notice or care.

Next thing she needed to provide for him was a cause, a really tough fight that would challenge a krogan in battle and bring honour, "I'm on a mission that everyone who knows about it says is suicide. My enemy threatens galaxies and is currently abducting entire human colonies. Their technology is too advanced for the colonies." she explained then growled, "They have the technology to paralyse everyone making it impossible for them to fight back."

This was news to Rana as well and she gasped in shock.

At that Grunt growled in disgust, "There is no honour in that."

"None at all. They don't give a vorcha's arse about honour and we're going to stop them." Shepard asserted with confidence. "Everyone on this ship has earned their place and has a different job to do. Not everyone is a warrior so don't go around hitting everything that moves. You want to spar you come to me." she smirked, "I could use a punching bag that actually fights back." especially since she was banned from her punching bag. Oh wouldn't Chakwas and Miranda be _pleased _that she'd upgraded her punching bag for a perfect hulk of a krogan.

He chuckled and nodded, "Understood."

"Let's show you around then." Shepard turned, expecting him to follow. The tour gave her a chance to talk with him more, assess his personality and what he'd been trained in as he'd claimed O'Keer's imprinting hadn't taken.

Rana was also very curious, she had after all spent a great deal of time working on O'Keer's project of which this 'Grunt' appeared to be the culmination.

It turned out his training in the arts of war was very thorough as Rana had made clear. He wasn't showing signs of insanity yet but he _had_ only just entered the real world and not the images the template had flashed into his mind. Getting some food in his stomach she introduced him to Jacob and Garrus, handing over the reins of keeping an eye on the newly awakened krogan to Jacob as Grunt had glared at Garrus rather heatedly for some reason. She'd then passed Rana off to Kelly as she had some work to do and Kelly had finished hers for the day.

Heading to the lift she was stopped in her tracks by a stern looking Kasumi with arms crossed and toe tapping.

"You." she pointed to Shepard, "My quarters. Now." she flicked her hand to her door.

Shepard's brow rose, "And should I refuse?" the assertive tone in the master thief had her intensely curious.

"I have a chat with _Miranda_." Kasumi threatened.

Shepard started walking without another word but she did frown slightly at the petite Japanese woman. It seemed she'd discovered what Miranda couldn't and it was not a conversation to be having outside the lift.

When the doors closed behind Kasumi she activated her console with her omni-tool, "I've cleared the room of bugs in case you're worried about her listening in." she assured, grinning now, "So I found these cute as kiddie pics!"

Shepard chuckled as they came up on the screen, one of Persephone and one of Stephanie, "Gee Kasumi it took you a _whole week_ to figure it out. I thought you were supposed to be the best!" she teased.

Kasumi scoffed, "Yet _Miranda_ has had two _years_ to figure it out." she pointed out lightly then regretted it instantly as Shepard's face fell, all mirth and playfulness gone as she turned back to the images sadly. 'Shit, nice one Kasumi!' she scolded herself. Walking over she took Shepard by the arm and pulled her down into the lounge, "Talk to me." she murmured.

"Well... what do you want to know?" Shepard asked softly, thoughtfully. She wanted to be careful how much she shared without appearing like she was blocking the woman out.

"You still love her, so why haven't you told her?" Kasumi hit her lightly in the arm.

"I tried the day I woke up. She was seriously pissed there was something she didn't know about me and shut me down saying pretty much that if she didn't know it, it was meaningless." Shepard's voice was soft, sad.

Her voice tugged at Kasumi's heart.

"That left a pretty decent hole. Initially I was hurt and furious with her, I mean she wanted to put a control chip in my brain and told me straight to my face." Shepard's fists clenched and she visibly trembled at the memory. "Have you seen what control chips do to people? Have you seen how Batarian Slavers insert chips? There's a _reason_ I was called the Butcher of Torfan. After seeing them cut open the skulls of my best friends on Mindoir then the kids at the camps... their eyes, they just went dead, there was nothing _left_ of them. And Miranda, _my _Miri_,_ wanted to do that to me." she hissed, eyes open and staring at the images but not seeing anything past her memories. "So of course I didn't fucking tell her who I am and it's a bloody good thing to as whenever she gets close to figuring it out she has a..." she stopped suddenly, wide eyed at what she was about to reveal.

"Has a what?" Kasumi asked curiously reaching over to gently caress Shepard's scarred cheek to calm her a little as her eyes began to glow.

Shepard was startled and turned to Kasumi with a curious expression, "It's complicated, suffice it to say she finds out who I am and she might just have an aneurism."

"Huh?" Kasumi looked to her even more puzzled.

"I don't really know the details, neither does she really, you see she remembers Persephone she just doesn't see _me_ as Persephone. I'm hoping Rana can help her figure it out but until they've made some progress at restoring her mind you _cannot_ tell her this." Shepard gestured to the images.

Kasumi nodded, "Of course Shep, I _can_ keep a secret you know." she smiled reassuringly, this was far more interesting and twisted than she'd imagined. The 'fight' Shep and Miranda had had the other day that Shep had been coy about suddenly took on a very different light.

Shepard relaxed a little.

"So you've gotten over the wanting to put her over your knee and spank her over the chip thing?" Kasumi grinned.

At that Shepard chuckled, "Helped I punched her in the face knocking her out cold and sedating her on Freedom's Progress."

Kasumi laughed.

"Though putting her over my knee would be..." she stopped as the door slid open.

Miranda stood at the doorway with her arms crossed and a look that was both suspicious and expectant.

Kasumi flicked off the images, "Miranda what a pleasant surprise, care to join us for a drink?"

"What the hell were you thinking?" Miranda snapped, eyes glued on Shepard.

Shepard's brows rose at the accusatory tone and all mirth from previous thoughts vanished, "Anything specific you're referring to?"

"You're letting the krogan just _wander_ the ship?" Miranda growled as though Shepard ought to have known already what had pissed her off and was merely stalling. It had been a shock to her when she'd gone to find Rana to see the hulking krogan eating freely in the mess with Jacob, Kelly and Rana as though he were simply a part of the crew.

"So you expect me to what, lock him up? Confine him to quarters? Relax. I assigned..." Shepard began to counter the accusation.

"Jacob is _not_ a babysitter." Miranda strode in and stood before Shepard now, glaring down at her.

Shepard stood up with smooth grace and met Miranda's gaze calmly, "Oh so you're volunteering then are you Miss Lawson? Actually that sounds like a marvellous idea, you did want to study him after all and you can determine for yourself if he's crazy or not." she reached to touch her communicator to contact Jacob.

Miranda's hand shot out and caught Shepard's wrist with a huff, "He should be quarantined until we can determine his systems are functioning properly outside the tank and Miss Chambers and Rana Thanoptis can evaluate him."

"Chakwas is keeping an eye on him through a wrist monitor, I've already talked with Kelly and Rana, they and Jacob are going to work together to keep tabs on him, help him acclimatize and Massani's keeping Jessie primed just in case." she assured Miranda.

"Jessie?" Miranda frowned, no idea what Shepard was talking about but at least she was taking precautions of some sort.

"His rifle, don't ask." Shepard reached up with her other hand and lightly held Miranda's shoulder, "Shall we continue this in your quarters?" she asked quietly.

"That won't be..." Miranda stopped as Shepard gripped her shoulder tighter and her amber eyes hardened, "Certainly Commander." she nodded and turned, breaking the contact with Shepard.

"Somebody's getting spanked!" Kasumi chimed rather joyously.

Both women glared at her which caused her to burst out laughing.

In her quarters Miranda strode over to her workstation and sat, refraining from openly glaring at Shepard and concentrating her gaze on her screen.

"Miranda, I realize you're used to being in charge but that is the second time you've barged in on me at an inappropriate moment demanding answers, three if you include my quarters earlier. The first time being when I was in my bathroom naked." Shepard wasn't angry just yet but was rather annoyed though she kept her tone even and calm.

"It's nothing I haven't seen before Shepard." Miranda pointed out smartly, Shepard had said she'd check with Rana and run _tests_ on the krogan before waking him and she hadn't even informed her she was doing it either.

Shepard bristled, "I'm almost hesitant to ask but would you be comfortable with me barging in on you like that?"

Miranda met her gaze, "I'm sure you'd enjoy it." she retorted quickly.

Shepard stiffened, "Damnit Miri what's gotten into you? I thought we were okay."

"You said you'd discuss with Rana if the krogan was mentally stable." Miranda growled at her.

"And I did that, she was with me even when I woke him and has been monitoring him the whole time he's been awake. Kelly's evaluating him psychologically, Jacob and Massani are keeping him in line physically and I've designated the starboard cargo observation as his quarters to keep him away from the crew." Shepard responded quickly and noted Miranda's eyes narrowed.

"And you didn't think to inform your XO of all this _prior_ to it taking place?" Miranda pointed out icily.

Understanding dawned for Shepard, Miranda was pissed at being left out of the loop. "I'm sorry Miranda I should have informed you but there was no call for little stunt you pulled in Kasumi's quarters."

Miranda's glare didn't abate, "I apologize Commander, I shall attempt to be more respectful of your _privacy_ in the future." her tone was a little too dry to be truly sincere.

"It's not just about my privacy but also the _way_ you approached me. If we were alliance I'd have your arse in the brig for insubordination." she held up her hand for silence as Miranda went to point out the obvious, "Yes I know this isn't an alliance vessel, but I want you to think this through honestly. Would you appreciate your second bursting in on you as you have done and demanding an explanation in the manner you did?" she kept her tone even as she asked.

Miranda prickled, she'd almost prefer Shepard yelling at her rather than this even tempered appeal, "No." she muttered, finally acknowledging where Shepard was coming from.

"I understand you have concerns and I'm more than willing to talk with you Miranda, I thought we'd already established that. Just ask respectfully and it will make a world of difference in how I respond and how much information I decide to give you because frankly if you piss me off I'm not liable to tell you much of anything XO or not. Are we clear?" Shepard's husky tone dropped slightly to get the point across, this wasn't something personal history could override, this was a command position and she was the commanding officer _not_ Miranda.

"Clear." Miranda bristled but nodded crisply and applied her analytical mind rather than the bruising ego that was demanding she assert herself. Shepard could have reprimanded her in front of Kasumi especially considering she'd challenged Shepard in front of the woman, but Shepard had politely answered her questions then reprimanded her privately. She sighed and sat back from her console, "I apologize Shepard." she was actually sincere this time.

Shepard just nodded, relieved to hear she meant it and so glad she'd been able to keep her cool, she was quite impressed with herself actually. "Is there anything else you want to discuss?"

Miranda looked at her, "Any reason why you were looking at images of Persephone with Kasumi?" she asked with a hint of annoyance.

Shepard's mind raced to think of a response that wouldn't get Miranda's brain fried, "Kasumi overheard our conversation on the Citadel and wanted to know about this mysterious lost love of yours. She was pestering me about it and I figured if left to her own devices she'd pester you so I told her to look Persephone up herself if she wanted to know more about her. She was complaining that all information on her stops when she was sixteen and showing me pics of her." Shepard shrugged like it was no big deal.

Miranda looked rather annoyed.

"If you'd _rather_ I send her to you..." Shepard grinned figuring she already knew the response to that.

"I would." Miranda nodded, she was very interested in finding out anything about Persephone, it had been so long since she'd heard anything about her best friend and first love.

Shepard wasn't quite quick enough to cover the 'oh shit' look as that question backfired on her.

Miranda's eyes narrowed, "There's something you don't want me to know?"

"I just think you've got more important things to be doing with your time. It's one thing to keep a bored thief occupied and another to distract you when you have little time for distractions." Shepard shrugged, trying to be as nonchalant as possible.

Miranda wasn't buying it.

Shepard sighed and rolled her eyes, "Fine. One monumental distraction coming right up. And I thought _you_ were the one supposed to be keeping _me_ focussed on the mission." she muttered.

Miranda hesitated, Shepard had a point there, "I'll talk to her when I'm ready." she nodded.

Shepard was stopped at the door by a softer question.

"Did you know her?"

"I thought it was clear that we shouldn't talk about any links between me and your past." Shepard reminded her, wishing she could just tell her, that this horrible _waiting_ could be over. It would be so easy to just say, 'I _am_ Persephone'. But Miranda wasn't ready, they couldn't risk it and she hoped that when the time came Miranda would understand.

Miranda straightened and nodded, "You're right, I shouldn't have asked."

"Are we... okay?" Shepard asked hesitantly, hovering in the doorway.

"Of course. So long as you keep me updated more promptly in the future." Miranda returned quickly and with a warning smile.

Shepard nodded, "And if there's something you want to discuss or yell at me about, keep it private and when I'm _dressed_." she smirked and her eyes twinkled, "Or I might have to insist equal disclosure."

Miranda chuckled, "You wish, go back to your gossiping I have _work_ to do!" she waved at the door casually.

Shepard saluted with a cheeky grin and when the door closed behind her she exhaled a deep breath slowly. That had been close, too close for comfort. It was clear that thinking of Persephone herself didn't cause problems, it was only when Miranda began to link Stephanie with Persephone that issues arose. Her frown deepened as she thought of Kasumi, the woman had better not let anything slip!

Kasumi came face to face with a side of Shepard she never expected to experience.

"You say something that gets her killed and I will never forgive you." Shepard growled menacingly, her eyes glowing red.

Kasumi bit back a small whimper, "Got it. Lips sealed." she ran her finger across her lips in a zipping motion, "Totally terrified! Can I have nice Shep back please?" the thought of being on Shep's infamous Shit List was a truly terrifying thought, especially after what she'd witnessed on Omega.

Shepard felt a little bad about scaring the woman who'd been nothing but friendly and a genuinely pleasant person to be around, "Sorry. I lost her once, I..." she ducked her face and the glow in her eyes faded.

Kasumi closed the distance between them and hugged her, relieved to have escaped that one unscathed and seriously hoping she _didn't_ jog Miranda's memory.

"She's _so close_ and I can't tell her because it could _kill_ her." Shepard whispered, leaning into the shorter woman but not reaching up to return the hug with her arms as she'd clenched her fists and stood rigidly in Kasumi's embrace.

Kasumi really didn't know what to say. "Want some Sake?" she asked finally, pulling back and looking up at the forlorn amber eyed brunette.

Shepard smiled sadly, "Sounds good to me." she murmured.


	25. Something ALWAYS blows up

Shepard _glared_ at the Blue Suns security guard and the turian withered like a vorcha. "I don't give a vorcha's arse about your _security_ measures. The _only_ things I'll relinquish are my bullets, at high velocity. Where do you want'em?" she whipped up her pistol, aiming it between his eyes. She was already angry with Kurill and she was not about to hand over her guns to his people.

The turian's face went gray in the turian version of going sheet white as the blood drained away from his face in fear.

"That won't be necessary Commander Shepard but it is a requirement for all visiting persons to disarm, this is a prison facility after all." Warden Kurill made his presence known and the guards relaxed marginally.

"It's _Spectre_ actually and that will not be happening so you'll either let us in _armed_ or bring Jack to _us_." Shepard's glare bore into his predatory eyes and after a bare moment he faltered and nodded.

"Our facility can certainly handle two armed guests. If you would follow me." He gestured for them to follow then turned and walked through the security doors.

Shepard followed with Miranda right behind her. The Warden led them along a route that was obviously designed to impress 'buyers' as he'd explained that some of the less violent criminals could be sold and there were occasions where others were bought just like Jack was being. Shepard had grimaced at the notion of 'buying' Jack and it made her anger towards the turian simmer closer to boiling point.

Miranda could feel Shepard's anger, her biotics were unsettled and swirling around her like a storm. She could almost see waves of air moving around Shepard like heatwaves off a sunbaked road and knew that Kurill was moving closer and closer to being on Shepard's Shit List. Until they had Jack in their custody it was not wise to risk Shepard losing it at him or letting on to the turian just how mad Shepard was getting with him.

Shepard jumped a little at how close Miranda suddenly was and bit her lip when Miranda's hand lightly brushed the small of her back. It wasn't the physical touch that affected her, as she was wearing her armour after all, but the biotic _caress_. Looking to Miranda sharply she found her eyes locked with those intense cobalt blues.

_Calm down Steph._

Shepard blinked as Miranda's voice whispered in her mind. "What the hell?" she murmured, wide eyed in shock.

Kurill assumed she was talking about the prisoner containment system below that had just separated two inmates. "We try to use non-violent methods against displays of aggression as violence only provokes them further in these situations. Quite effective is it not?" he smirked.

Shepard cleared her throat and nodded, breaking eye contact with Miranda, "Indeed." she drawled to the turian.

"So what happens if a government chooses not to pay the maintenance fee for an incarcerated individual?" Miranda asked smoothly, not sure what had shocked Shepard but the anger had definitely faded substantially at her touch.

"We inform the government that we will return their prisoner at an undisclosed time and location." Kurill kept walking, "They always pay."

"So it's an extortion racket." Shepard observed a little more heatedly than intended but given how he'd forced them to come it was hardly far from the truth.

"You can question my methods but not my motives. We do the hard things to keep bad people locked up." He grunted at her though didn't sound overly fussed as though he'd heard it many times before.

"And yet you're _eager_ to sell off Jack. Why's that?" Shepard demanded firmly.

Kurill just chuckled, "You really don't know much about Jack do you." he stated confident in his knowledge of what they would have gotten themselves into. "Jack's in processing, down the hall take a left. I'll make sure the credits have come through." he nodded to them and disappeared through the door beside them before Shepard could argue with him.

Miranda glanced at Shepard as she made no move to follow his directions.

"Miranda did that not strike you as odd? Him leaving us here with no escort when all it would take to confirm payment is a simple comm check?" Shepard asked her softly.

Miranda frowned, "Indeed." she glanced back to where Kurill had gone.

Shepard touched her comms, "Joker, I smell a rat get the ground team ready on the double."

"_Aye-aye Commander. Extermination team will be ready on the double."_ he returned promptly.

For anyone watching the two women making their way through the clear plastasteel hallways none would have guessed that the pair were on high alert as their strides were relaxed and their outward demeanours calm. Neither of them had their hands lingering near their weapons nor where they looking around in a manner that expressed anything more than mere curiosity.

"So what was that back there?" Shepard asked softly, glancing at Miranda.

"What? You needed to calm down before you ripped him apart..." Miranda responded calmly.

"Yes but you told me to calm down _in my mind._" Shepard whispered to her, not wanting any of the guards to overhear.

Miranda frowned and looked to her in confusion, "Pardon?"

"I heard your voice whisper clearly in my mind 'Calm down Steph' and your biotics... goddess they... you felt..." her casual swagger suddenly became more awkward.

"Perhaps we should discuss this back on the ship." Miranda suggested softly, not sure what she could say to that, she knew she had thought those exact words but how was it possible that Shepard had actually _heard_ them?

Shepard sighed, "You're right." she nodded and let the matter drop for now.

At the outer door of processing Shepard stopped and glanced at the technician.

"Jack's in that module over there." the guy nodded, making no move to head over there himself.

Shepard bowed her head slightly, activating her biotic vision and looked through the walls to see... nothing. "Willing to stake your life on it?" she purred, her pistol up in a flash and pressed between his eyes.

"Oh shit!" he gulped, eyes wide and pissing himself quite literally.

"Where is Jack?" She asked softly, her husky voice taking on a dangerous sexy tone.

"C-c-cryogenic s-storage. D-down the hall." He stammered, pointing the right direction.

"Now was that really so hard?" Shepard moved to leave.

The man began to relax.

It didn't last long as Shepard pistol whipped him, knocking him out cold.

"How the fuck does a coward like that work in a place like this?" Shepard muttered as she strode out the door. She had determined already how she had to behave towards Jack whose rap sheet indicated had a problem with authority and a penchant for violence so she was already mentally preparing herself.

"I wouldn't be surprised if most of the... staff here are cowards. Give them a uniform, a gun and people they can bully and it makes them feel stronger than they truly are." Miranda suggested conversationally, pausing mid sentence as a more demeaning description for the 'staff' had come to mind first.

Shepard could have turned it into a jibe on Cerberus but opted not to, "You get soldiers in the Alliance like that. They don't make it far out of boot camp and if they do they're just sadists."

Their conversation was halted by a dozen guards with weapons out and looking momentarily surprised at their presence.

"Warden Kurill did say down the corridor, left then right didn't he?" Shepard posed thoughtfully to Miranda.

"_They've taken down Jocham. Subdue them, they're both valuable._" Kurill's voice suddenly sounded over a loud speaker.

Shepard and Miranda acted before the mercs could even raise their weapons. Two powerful shockwaves tore through the hallway, shaking it rather unnervingly as it was a long drop down to the prison section below.

A minute later they jogged passed the mercs, not a single man left standing.

"_Shepard, we're picking up alarms what's going on?_" Garrus's voice filled her ear piece.

"I think Kurill's decided he'd make more money selling Miranda and I off than selling us Jack." Shepard mused, walking into the control room for the cryogenic holding cell Jack was apparently in. Looking at it biotically and smirked, "Huh, Jack's a she." she commented out loud.

"_What do you want us to do Shepard?"_ Garrus asked quickly.

"Garrus make sure no one gets on the ship, secure the perimeter so we can make a clean exit. Miranda and I'll get Jack and blast our way out, making a quick detour to put my boot up Kurill's arse before we leave." she growled.

Miranda was checking over the controls and grimaced.

"_Got it. Establishing a perimeter._" Garrus acknowledged the order.

Miranda looked back over her shoulder and was once again surprised by the energy radiating from Shepard's eyes, "So what do you see?" she asked curiously.

"Jack's biotics are... substantial but chaotic, she's emotion driven, anger mostly. She's going to be one pissed off bitch when she thaws, I'd better get down there before you unlock her." She didn't bother going for the door, instead she blasted out the window gaining the attention of two heavy mechs below that were not going to be happy about her presence.

Miranda felt breathless at the sheer power Shepard unleashed as she _crushed_ the mechs while they were still trying to get a lock on their target above them, "Correct me if I'm wrong, but you weren't that strong on Freedom's Progress or Omega."

"I'd been awake how many hours on Freedoms Progress? And I'm still... healing." Shepard pointed at her face that was still scarred.

"But that doesn't account for..." Miranda began but Shepard cut her off.

"Focus Miri, you can study my biotics later. Right now Jack." Shepard nodded, powering up her biotics in readiness to drop down below. Chakwas would be pissed off at her for getting into a fight when technically she wasn't restored to active duty yet, she'd only been 'allowed' out by the good doctor because there wasn't supposed to _be_ any fighting.

"If I hack this terminal every cell in this block is going to open." Miranda warned her.

"Prison riot, that'll keep the mercs busy." Shepard nodded in approval, "Do it." she ordered before she jumped through the shattered window.

Miranda sighed, "It'll keep _us_ busy too." but she obeyed the command and began hacking.

Shepard waited and watched as the cryonic cylinder rose up from its holding, the mist of the thawing of Jack washing over the machinery giving an air of mystery and increasing anticipation. Alarms were blaring as just as Miranda had predicted the whole sector was beginning to go up in flames with the prisoner release. Her brows rose slightly as Jack was finally revealed.

Shaven bald, literally covered in tattoos from head to toe, or so she assumed, wearing nothing but a nipple band on top and black cargo pants with heavy boots she was most definitely a sight. Jack was small not quite on the petite side but shorter than Shepard, slender as most biotics were and her features were actually delicate and pretty. Until she began to wake and the peaceful expression on her face was replaced with an ugly mask of rage.

Shepard held up protein bars in both hands in an attempt to show she wasn't hostile.

Jack snarled, her brain wasn't yet fully functioning. All she saw was an armoured woman, a guard, alarms were blaring and she was still restrained. Ripping herself out of the restraints that were strong enough to hold a krogan she charged up her biotics.

"So now's where I say naptimes over, we're busting you out?" Shepard spoke quickly but clearly. But it wasn't enough to get through to Jack just yet.

Jack roared and charged at her.

Shepard was quicker, side-stepping the biotic punch she sent Jack sprawling to her knees and was on her in a heartbeat.

Jack tried to push herself off the ground but the biotic field holding her was far too strong and she was weak from the freezer.

Shepard crouched in front of her and held out the bars again, "Here, it'll help get your metabolism moving and stabilize your biotics."

"Who the fuck are you?" Jack snarled, managing to look up at the scarred face of the brunette, she was glowing with biotic energy in holding her down at the moment.

"Name's Shepard. I'm on a critical mission and I need your help, but first we need to get off this station. Kurill decided it was more lucrative to keep my XO and I to sell so we're going to show him the error of his ways." Her expression hardened, "Pissing me off is painful, betraying me is fatal. He's done both so is going to die painfully. Wanna help?"

Gunfire erupted upstairs adding the pressing need to get moving quickly.

"Miranda?" Shepard queried, not taking her eyes off Jack's deep brown eyes that were so full of anger and hate they were just about black.

"_We need to leave._" Came her business toned response.

Shepard chuckled, "That is the plan you know, of course I have no doubt it will also entail a few explosions. You know you can't take me anywhere without _something_ blowing up in our faces."

Miranda huffed, "_We're on a space station. Blowing things up is hardly conducive to our own survival._"

Shepard scoffed and rose to her feet, "It's a big station. It can hold together for a few good bangs, I don't really give a shit what happens when we leave though." she lifted Jack up biotically, not releasing her yet. She flicked off her comm so Miranda couldn't hear her, "Now Jack. I don't know anything about your history or what fucking connection you have with Cerberus,"

Jacks face contorted with rage at the mere _mention_ of Cerberus and she snarled like an animal.

"but _I_ am in command of this mission and make no mistake, you pull any Cerberus shit with me or my crew and you'll _wish_ I'd just space you. Got it?" she growled at Jack fiercely.

"Cerberus can die! They fucking experimented on me and if you're working with them I'll fucking rip your face off!" Jack snarled, writhing as she tried to get free, her biotics surging but not strong enough to break from the strangers hold.

Shepard was stunned and blinked a couple times in disbelief until realization dawned on her, "_That's_ why your biotics are so anger driven. Cerberus fucking screwed you over to try and amp you up." she breathed.

"Put me down bitch!" Jack roared at her.

Shepard tightened her grip, "Look at me!" she demanded firmly.

"Fuck off!" Jack snarled.

"I am Commander Shepard, first human Spectre. I've blown up six Cerberus bases, killed over one hundred Cerberus personnel and totally fucked up at least three of their major projects." She asserted, barking out her words as though she were a boot camp Commander breaking in new troops.

It was Jack's turn to blink without comprehension.

"On my last mission with the Spectres I was fucking spaced. Cerberus, for some really fucked up reason, spent over two years putting me back together. Guess they really didn't get the message first time round that I'm the _last_ person they want on one of their bases." she scoffed and continued quickly, "I'd have ripped them apart already but there are bigger issues right now. Since I died the Council and Alliance trashed my name meaning Cerberus are the only ones with the guns I need to pull off my mission. Now the fact that you fucking hate Cerberus just makes my day Sunshine."

"Don't fucking call me that!" Jack hissed at her furiously.

"I'll call you whatever the hell I like because _I'm_ in charge and as you can feel I can wipe the floor with you, your biotics are _nothing_ compared to mine and if you want to get off this station alive you're coming with me." Shepard snarled back at her, stalking up and getting right in her face.

Jack grimaced as Shepard's field tightened around her, crushing her a little more with every passing second.

"Now I didn't come here to pick up some pansy arsed, whining, little school girl." Shepard's voice was low and dangerous.

To say Jack was offended was a massive understatement.

"You're gonna need to _earn_ your place on _my_ ship and if you're fucking lucky when my mission is over I might even let you come along when I rip the Illusive Man limb from limb." She snarled.

"Who's the fucking Illusive Man and why should I give a fuck?" Jack snarled at her.

"He's the guy in charge of Cerberus you dumb arse, Cerberus is _his_ organization and everything they did to you was done in _his_ name." Shepard was a little surprised Jack didn't know that but the lights went on in Jack's eyes.

"You promise to take me with you and give me all their files on me and I'll be your fucked up crazy bitch." Jack growled at her.

"Deal. Just keep that first bit to yourself, I need Cerberus playing nice until I have everything I need." Shepard released the field and held out her hand.

Jack glared at the offered hand but shook it, "Now we're done with the fuzzy shit we gonna blow shit up?"

Shepard smirked, "Hell yes." she flicked her comm back on.

Jack ripped off the wrappers to the protein bars Shepard had given her and began to chow them down. She might be a badass but she wasn't stupid and the fact that this Shepard had overpowered her so easily pissed the hell out of her.

"Jack's in. Let's kick this party up a notch. EDI locate Warden Kurill then get me the quickest route to his arse, it's got a date with my boot." Shepard growled, glancing over to the door on her left as Miranda strode through.

Jack went to hit her with a biotic shockwave but was stopped as Shepard grabbed her wrist and jerked her back around.

"My XO, Miranda Lawson." she introduced firmly with a nod in Miranda's direction.

"You never said shit about a Cerberus cheerleader!" Jack snarled at her, her eyes wild with hate instantly not just for being Cerberus, as her uniform declared even without their customary logo, but that goddamn sexy figure and the confident stride as though she hadn't just taken out a bunch of mercs.

"You really think Cerberus would just hand me the keys to their latest and greatest toy without someone keeping an eye on me? _Play nice_." Shepard growled, gripping her wrist so hard she felt the bones crunch beneath her fingers.

"Shit, fuck it fine! Lemme go already." Jack swore at her, tearing her eyes off the sex goddess to glare at Shepard who was also a fucking sex goddess in military armour.

"_Warden Kurill is preparing a defensible position in section D. Sending coordinates and route to your omni-tool._" EDI chimed in.

Shepard activated her omni-tool at its beep.

"You better not screw me over Shepard." Jack snarled at her, cradling her wrist.

"Suck it up Jack, whining's for little girls." Shepard shot back with a growl to her husky voice.

Miranda hid her surprise at Shepard's handling of Jack.

Jack muttered murderous threats under her breath but Shepard could see in her energy that the tough bitch act was actually warming her up in a good way.

Shepard's eyes narrowed as an alternate route came to mind, "Alright Jack, I want a hole in the wall right there." she gestured.

"What the fuck for!" Jack demanded.

"Aw too hard for you? Miranda show her how it's done." Shepard glanced at Miranda.

Miranda's eyes narrowed but she took a step forward, powering up her biotics.

"Fuck that! Never said I couldn't." Jack snarled and she lunged, surging for the wall and blasting a massive hole through it into the maintenance corridor behind it.

Shepard winked at Miranda indicating that's what she'd expected.

Miranda rolled her eyes but wisely said nothing.

"Alright EDI, recalculate your route." Shepard drew her pistol and jogged into the darkness.

EDI sent another route through that was definitely faster but would take them through two prison sections that would be in full riot mode by now. "_Spectre this route is highly dangerous, I recommend my previous route._" EDI sounded concerned.

"I'm making a point EDI, _no one_ screws with me. We're going to cut through his pathetic defences and he can watch his death approaching." Shepard growled, the adrenaline was pumping through her and her cybernetics were glowing now.

The first section they entered was ablaze with gunfire, shouts, screams, fires and machinery falling apart as explosions ripped through the systems. It was bloody chaos and Jack was thriving on it. She didn't need a weapon, she _was_ a weapon. The violence fuelled her and the more she killed the more alive she felt.

Shepard tactically pointed her in a particular direction and gave the simple instruction of 'let'em have it.' while she got a feel for the woman. Jack was a powerful menace and drew everyone's attention to her meaning they were wide open for the precision assaults from Shepard and Lawson.

A YMIR mech lumbered out of its holding station too far away for Jack to rip it apart but meant she was exposed, without shields or armour and no guns.

"Miranda, swarp." Shepard raised her arm and called a singularity into being.

"Swarp?" Miranda raised her brow at Shepard.

"Quicker than singularity/warp." Shepard shrugged.

Miranda sighed and lashed out her warp.

Jack threw herself behind cover as shrapnel began to strike around her, "Fuck! Who the fuck did that!" she yelled back at them.

"Jealous?" Shepard yelled in return.

"Some fucking _warning_ next time!" Jack yelled, she actually was a little jealous. _She_ was supposed to be the biggest, meanest biotic bitch, that's what Teltin had been about, torturing her to make her the most powerful human biotic. Teltin had obviously never gotten their hands on these two.

As they worked through the second section Jack paid much closer attention to the super bitch and her cheerleader.

Super bitch was obviously military, she could drill a man between the eyes with that pistol of hers at just about any distance in this tub, she also had some pretty nasty tricks in that omni-tool of hers as she fried mech systems, dropped shields and shocked idiots who got too close not to mention her biotics were way off the chart.

The cheerleader was also a fucking badass, more than decent shot, she too had some omni-tool tricks and her biotics while not as strong as either Shepard's or hers she used them in tandem with Shepard's attacks making them appear stronger. On closer inspection Jack realized that the pair were actually fighting more like one entity, even their biotics were in sync. She shook her head at them as she relieved a very dead guard of his shotgun.

Shepard stopped them at the next checkpoint door. "Kurill's in there." she murmured, studying the wall intently.

"Think you can glare him down from here?" Jack snorted, "Come on..." she went to go through the door.

Shepard stopped her with softly spoken words, "Open that door and you die."

"What the fuck's your problem!" Jack turned on her wildly.

"They've got two dozen assault rifles and shotguns all pointing at that door, as soon as it opens you'll be stepping into a wall of bullets." she pointed out.

"How the fuck d'you know that?" Jack frowned, moving a step away from the door warily.

"They're also scared shitless." Shepard smirked, "Ready Garrus?"

"_Always ready to make a great entrance Shepard._" Garrus returned lightly.

"Ha, you know what I like handsome, give'em some Vakarian style." Shepard chuckled and prepared her biotics, "Garrus and the others are gonna blast through the other entrance catching them off guard. We're all gonna hit the idiots with shockwaves, Jack stick right, Miri left, I'll take straight down the centre. Wait for my order." she ordered swiftly.

There was a loud explosion and they could feel the vibrations from it.

Jack was itching to go, her biotics already flaring in anticipation.

Shepard waited for the gunfire and smiled darkly, "Let's dance."

Warden Kurill was cursing most vehemently. How had _one human female_ caused so much trouble? It was supposed to have been simple. He had an entire _station_ of hardened mercs at his command for spirits sake. Yet she, Miranda Lawson and Jack had cut through his forces like a hot knife through gel. He turned as movement at the door they were _expecting_ trouble to come from caught his eye. His eyes widened as the three human females, all glowing with powerful biotics, strode through with arms lashing out almost in unison. Waves of dark energy swirled along the ground and when they struck his troops they were thrown like dolls.

"Damn you Shepard!" Kurill bellowed, "You had to make this hard didn't you." he shook his fist at her, "You're too much trouble, at least I can recapture _Jack_!"

"Like hell asshole!" Jack roared back at him, her newly acquired shotgun blasting the head off a human merc.

"Yeah can so see that happening! What happened to all that bullshit about serving the galaxy?" Shepard spat at him as she picked up a batarian and threw him at the shield that was surrounding Kurill.

The batarian screamed in agony as the energy of the shield burned him alive.

"I do the hard things civil governments won't do!" Kurril screamed at her, the screaming, writhing batarian blocking his view of her.

"You are nothing but a barefaced, two bit slave trader and I don't have time for your shit." Shepard's voice dropped dangerously low.

Jack and Miranda both felt the changing vortex of her biotic energy shifting to something _else_.

"Garrus, Miranda, Kasumi take out the generators!" She called to the three who were the closest to the glowing pillars that had tentacles of energy feeding the glowing sphere around Kurill. Bowing her head slightly she released her grip on the dead batarian, letting his body crash to the ground below the raised platform Kurill was firing down from.

In seconds the trio had permanently deactivated the generators leaving Kurill exposed with only a thin guard rail to duck behind.

There were only two mercs left alive, pinned down and not for much longer as Grunt closed in on them gleefully, the blood of turians, humans and batarians colouring his armour, blue, red and orange running in rivulets.

Shepard had never attempted what she was about to do but with the boost in her biotics she was given the opportunity to really put some of the prothean biotic techniques to use and the prothean's put the asari to shame. Her movements were seemingly slow and filled with grace, like a martial arts master greeting their opponent. Only instead of calling her opponent to fight she was tearing him apart at the cellular level.

Kurill screamed hideously in agony, losing all control of his body. The pain was beyond description, blinding, burning, boiling him alive in his own scales.

Everyone from the Normandy stared, slack jawed as Kurill seemed to expand, his screams like nothing anyone had ever heard from a turian. Then all of a sudden he simply exploded into a cloud of blue and gray mist, his armour falling to the ground uselessly.

After the screams the sudden silence was deafening, not even the muted klaxons of the alarms penetrated it. Until Shepard spoke in a voice that carried throughout the chamber.

"I am nobodies slave or pet." she was looking to Miranda.

Miranda paled, was that a threat? Her eyes were still glowing, her anger still flowing around her.

"And neither are you Miranda." Shepard finished with a nod then strode towards the entrance Garrus and the others had burst in through.

Miranda relaxed, not a threat against her personally but definitely a warning for the Illusive Man as she recalled what Shepard had had to say about him during several of their more heated discussions. Now they had Jack and the station was ripping itself apart with explosions it was really time to go so she followed Shepard quickly.

Jack shivered, that was a really nasty piece of work. This Shepard was no soft touch and if she kept her word could even be useful. She sauntered after the woman, taking in the newcomers who fell in with her new ride. It was a strange bunch, turian, salarian, krogan and a few humans, definitely _not_ a typical Cerberus squad with all their anti-alien bullshit. Hell the older guy was most definitely a lifetime merc not some pencil pushing science freak. The dark skinned guy screamed Alliance but wore armour in the same colours as Cerberus though he'd scrubbed off the logo's, confusing. It was gonna be one hell of a ride.


	26. Sharing

**_Some very interesting biotic ideas, I like the idea of team work with biotics (as shown with Seph and Miri's 'Swarp') and different applications for Singularities certainly does open up some interesting opportunities... I've answered a few people privately explaining that Seph's biotics are heavily based on Prothean techniques and that in my story the Protheans went about their biotics differently to the Asari whose techniques are the dominant influence in 'modern society'. There is also a third influence on her biotics... linked to the ones who have messed with Miri... Which is why she's so powerful biotically and linked with Miri. You may recall at the end of ch 14 'The Beast Within' Miranda reflects that there are abnormalities in Shepard's brain that couldn't be explained that Rana will begin to sense in this chapter..._**

**_Enough of my rabbiting away! Enjoy this next chapter! :D_**

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><p>"Jacob will show you where to stow that." Shepard nodded to Jack's newly acquired shotgun, "Might even have something better for you to play with but while on the ship no guns or knives outside the armoury." She asserted to Jack.<p>

"Don't need 'em." Jack growled, glowing biotically.

"No shit." Shepard growled right back, also glowing in warning.

Jack smirked and sauntered after the dark skinned man.

Before Miranda could leave the airlock Shepard gently touched her arm. She looked to Shepard quizzically.

Shepard waivered on her feet and gripped Miranda's sleeve a little tighter to steady herself. Every step she'd taken since using that molecular attack had been harder and harder, even that small burst of biotic energy with Jack had been a massive strain.

Miranda reached out and firmly held her shoulder, "Are you okay?" she asked softly, Joker was just around the corner and within earshot of the airlock.

Shepard shook her head, "I... can't lift my feet." she admitted in a strained whisper.

Miranda looked over the Commander's armour with a critical eye, she had no injury, not even any scoring from weapons fire as her shields, both from the armour and her biotics had held. That meant it was biotic.

Shepard released Miranda's sleeve as Miri's other hand was keeping her upright now.

Miranda produced a power bar, all biotics carried them and Shepard ordinarily would have but she'd given hers to Jack.

With a grateful nod Shepard accepted it and with trembling hands ripped open the wrapper.

Miranda watched her every movement with the critical eye of a medical doctor, which technically she was given everything she'd learned to put Shepard back together. Shepard's cheeks were slightly flushed, her eyes a little dilated and showing a feint cybernetic glow not instigated by emotion, her breathing was a little shallow and now that she was actually studying Shepard she felt something was different. Frowning slightly she pulled off her glove using her teeth as if she released Shepard the woman would fall.

Shepard arched her brow at the move, then stilled as Miranda reached up and cupped the side of her neck with her bare hand. The touch of skin on skin was electrifying and her breath hitched in the back of her throat, she'd only just swallowed her mouthful in time.

"Your biotics... I can barely feel them." Miranda gasped, wide eyed at the revelation. Shepard felt _empty_ at the moment.

"Neither can I, hence I can hardly move right now." Shepard murmured, her stomach was clenching in knots as her body screamed for nutrients, for energy to replace what she'd burned. She closed her eyes as Miranda's thumb traced along her jaw every so lightly, sending sparks through her burned out body.

"We need to get you to medbay." Miranda asserted quickly, Shepard needed nutrients faster than what digestion could provide.

Shepard shook her head, "Jack can't see me like this, not yet, neither can Grunt." she gave a small smile, "He was pretty damn effective today."

"Brutally. Like someone else I know." Miranda agreed with that assessment. The krogan was a bit like Jack, a wild, powerful weapon to be pointed in the direction of the enemy and let loose.

Shepard chuckled breathlessly, "Calling me brutal Miss Lawson?"

"What you did to Kurill was pretty brutal and I'm assuming why you're like this." Miranda observed.

"Yeah, wasn't sure I could pull it off. Might not have been so bad if I hadn't used my biotics so much beforehand." Shepard sighed then took the last bite of the bar. "You know Joker's gonna start rumours about us taking so long to leave the airlock." she smirked.

Miranda's smile became quite devious, "Not if I have to carry you out of here with a black eye."

Shepard chuckled, that could work. "I'll even give you ammunition. I promised Jack we'd give her all the files Cerberus has on her."

Miranda stiffened at that, "You had _no_ authority to do that!" she snapped.

Shepard grinned and turned her head slightly, pointing to her cheek, "Thought it was only fair considering Cerberus experimented and tortured her to make her some super biotic badass."

Miranda clenched her fist and swung. If Shepard had been at full strength the blow might have knocked her back a step. Barely able to stand as she was it threw her into the hull hard enough to knock her out cold. "Damnit! Shepard!" she rushed over to Shepard's side in surprise and rolled her over.

"Everything okay in there?" Joker called.

Miranda quickly checked Shepard's pulse, it was faster than it should be and she wasn't rousing.

Shepard slowly came to in the familiar bed and smell of the medbay. With a groan she reached up to touch her cheek, she had a splitting headache right now, "Lawson you're so grounded!" she moaned.

A familiar scoff sounded, "You can't _afford_ to ground me."

Shepard smiled and opened her eyes, squinting over at the dark haired angel who was administering a stim of something. "That was _so not_ the plan. How does 'knocked out' equate to 'black eye'?" she grumbled, pretending to pout.

Miranda smirked, "Guess you shouldn't have been showing off your biotics then." she was greatly relieved that Shepard was awake but there was a sense of satisfaction at returning the favour and all the crew knowing that _she'd_ knocked out _Commander Shepard._

Shepard chuckled breathlessly as she didn't have much energy right now, "You just couldn't resist could you? You've been _waiting _for that since Freedom's Progress."

"I'm a little above petty revenge Commander." Miranda returned imperiously.

"Yeah, yeah, you don't fool me Miri." Shepard waggled her finger up at Miranda, grinning from ear to ear.

"Well perhaps it was a _little_ satisfying." Miranda smiled down at Shepard who looked rather adorable grinning up at her like that, though she noticed Shepard was wincing slightly. "Hurting?"

"My pride certainly smarts. You didn't carry me in here did you?" Shepard sighed.

"How _else_ do you think you got in here?" Miranda raised her brow a little.

"Damn and I was unconscious and everything." Shepard clicked her fingers in an 'oh damn' gesture. "Can I get a repeat performance, minus the fist to the face, up to my quarters?" she asked playfully.

"Certainly not." Miranda shook her head.

"Your quarters?"

Miranda glared down at her.

Shepard held up her hands submissively, "Can you blame me for trying? Not every day I get carried around by a gorgeous woman."

Miranda rolled her eyes, "Not going to happen."

"Never say never." Shepard smirked cheekily, a touch of Seph's bubbly personality breaking through with that light hearted banter.

"I didn't. Now you're feeling better I have work to do." Miranda glanced over at Chakwas who was smiling at her console and pretending to ignore them.

"I meant what I said about those files for Jack." Shepard reminded her and what little mirth Miranda had allowed herself to show vanished.

"I gathered as much," Miranda responded coolly, "in case you didn't notice."

Shepard sighed, "Yeah figured." she rubbed her cheek, "By the way, you hit like a girl. Did you even break anything?"

The corner of Miranda's lips twitched and her fine brow arched, "I knocked you out cold Commander, what kind of _girl_ do you think I am?"

The words came out before Shepard could stop them, "My kind of girl."

Miranda's brow furrowed and her lips parted a little in surprise.

Shepard's eyes widened, "Damnit I said that out loud didn't I?"

Chakwas could scarcely contain her laughter and had to bite down on her lip as she laughed silently in the back of her chest.

"I'll keep that in mind, _Commander_." Miranda wasn't really shocked, given recent developments, but it was still a surprise to hear, and a reminder that she needed to tread carefully. Now was _not_ the time for personal entanglements, _especially_ with Shepard, but Shepard was so different...

Shepard went bright red and suddenly found her twiddling fingertips very interesting, her heart pounding in her ears in embarrassment. She didn't see the small smile that graced Miranda's perfect lips as she strode out of the medbay. When the doors swished shut she sighed, "Let it out Chakwas, I can _feel_ you laughing."

Chakwas did just that and walked over to her, patting her on the arm, "You are such a _marine_, Shepard."

"Urgh don't remind me. Destroying things is what I do best." she looked away from the motherly doctor, deeply saddened, "Especially the people I care about." she murmured.

The smile disappeared from Chakwas, "That's not true Stephanie. You _protect_ people, even more so the ones you care about. You could have left Jeff to die but you didn't, you gave your life to save him, to give us enough time to escape." she reached down and turned Shepard's face to look at her. "You're a _guardian_ in here." she put her hand over her heart, "You fight for those who can't, you give everything to protect the innocent and bring an end to anyone who would prey on the innocent. That does _not_ make you a destroyer. As for the people you care about, we're right here, with you and others are supporting you, you just can't see it yet. Give it time." she nodded her head towards Miranda's office, "Give _her_ time."

"Doctor Chakwas." Shepard smiled in a mock scandalized tone, deeply touched by the woman's sentiments, "Are you _encouraging_ me to fraternize with my executive officer?"

Chakwas leaned down and actually kissed her forehead, "Make the most of life Stephanie, you've given so much of it in service to others." she murmured.

Shepard blinked up at her, tears starting to glisten in her eyes. Words escaped her right now so she just nodded meekly, she really did love Chakwas like her mum.

Chakwas smiled and returned to her console and the doctorate editorial she was reading.

"So I hear the cheerleader knocked you the fuck out." Jack sneered up at the Commander. She'd made herself a comfortable little hidey hole in the dark confines of the engineering deck. Ordinarily she would have written the Commander off at having had her arse handed to her by someone like that _Lawson _princess_, _but she'd _seen_ what Shepard had done to Kurill with her own eyes.

"What, you think I'd let some pathetic little school girl be my XO? Miranda Lawson's a tough, ice cold bitch who'd as soon as put a bullet between your eyes if you cross her as she'd write a perfect little report describing it in detail. This may come as a surprise to you but running a ship and crew this size takes a little more than slamming morons into hulls and I hate writing reports." she grinned, "I happen to like she can do both. Saves me the trouble. She's also good at digging up information." With that she tossed a couple datapads onto the cot Jack was sprawled across. "You can thank her later, let me know if you find anything interesting."

Jack eagerly scooped up the datapads and when she glanced up Shepard's shadow was disappearing around the corner. She was actually kinda glad, 'thanks' wasn't really in her vocabulary. Eagerly she set about reading the data Shepard had given her, keeping her end of their deal which meant more to her than she had the words to express. If Shepard wanted something dead, Jack was all for killing it.

Shepard returned to Miranda's quarters. The information on Jack had been surprisingly quick and easy to get, as though the Illusive Man had been prepared for the request. It had Shepard wondering what would be _missing_ from the data and if that would come back to bite her in the arse. She made a point of touching the door chime and waiting for permission to proceed every time she entered Miranda's quarters. It had yet to impact Miranda's entry to the loft on a permanent basis but hey, she could only try and Miranda had used the chime _once _at least.

Miranda didn't look up from her console just yet knowing exactly who it was without EDI's introduction, "I've spoken with Rana about the mental block. She's agreed to assist and requires you to speak with her about your background that involves our prior relationship." she glanced up quickly at the use of the word, "I..."

Shepard held up her hand with a smile, "I get it. I'll talk with her in the loft." she saved Miranda the awkwardness of trying to rectify that comment when in actual fact it was quite true in both contexts. She wasn't quite sure if she should ask if Miranda was alright, she looked it but then she was an expert at wearing masks.

"Thank you. For now Rana and I both think it would be in my best interest to... not have anything that could trigger an attack." Miranda looked up apologetically.

Shepard sighed and rubbed her neck, "Right, in other words get out Shepard."

"We need to keep some distance between us, you know that." Miranda's expression and tone remained neutral, hiding away any shred of feeling or emotion she might have had.

"Yeah, we've done pretty well since the other day in the loft. Better not risk it further, send me a message if there's anything... anything you need from me." Shepard swallowed nervously, "But at some point I'd _really_ like to talk about what happened yesterday, the hearing your thought thing."

"Of course. Once this block is dealt with we have a lot to discuss." Miranda acknowledged with a nod, finding Shepard's awkwardness endearing as she fiddled with her nails and refused to look up at her.

Shepard nodded and left her to her work without another word, simply because she just didn't know what to say that wouldn't give away how disappointed she felt.

Rana was very nervous about being invited up to the Commanders private quarters alone. Finding the door open she was surprised at the choice of music being played. It was soft, gentle, emotive and stirred up feelings of wistful longing. Walking in she was surprised at the luxury of the quarters, the massive fish display to her left was certainly unexpected. What was even more so was that the music she was hearing was actually being played by Shepard herself from a holographic instrument piece attached to her omni-tool. It was with wonder that she waited, watching with wide eyed awe as this symbol of destruction and power showed a completely polar opposite side in creating such breathtaking music. There was a sense of vulnerability about her as she sat in shorts and singlet, her chocolate brown hair hanging loosely about her shoulders, eyes closed and her body moving with fluid grace in rhythm with the music she brought forth.

Shepard hadn't heard Rana enter but she did hear her sharp intake of breath and stopped playing quickly in embarrassment, "I, sorry I didn't hear you come in. I lost track of time..." She mumbled an apology, getting up quickly and flicking of the piano before turning to get dressed.

"Don't be sorry, that was beautiful." Rana offered, her breath catching in her throat as she saw Shepard's physique revealed for the first time when she uncurled from the lounge, it was such a shame when she covered up those long slender legs with baggy black track pants.

Shepard gave a shy smile before going over to her cooler and getting out a bottle of wine and two glasses, "Would you like a drink?" she asked hospitably.

"Sure." Rana didn't want to be rude and decline, the whole atmosphere in this luxurious little world away from the rest of the ship was relaxing. For the first time she was seeing Stephanie Shepard and not _Commander_ Shepard or _Spectre_ Shepard. It was most definitely eye opening.

Shepard poured the deep purple liquid and slid a glass into Rana's reach before sitting in her customary position on her lounge. "So can you help her?" she asked softly.

"I've had a look at her preliminary scans and talked with her about her symptoms but at this stage I'll need more data before I can answer that question." Rana didn't think it would be in her best interests to get Shepard's hopes up. With Saren she'd had to constantly be on her guard, always promising results and doing whatever it took, no matter how brutal, to ensure she got those results as her life had depended on it. With _Shepard_ it was different. There was no threat to her life. There was no expectation that she _had_ to do this. She had been asked respectfully, something she had missed for so long.

Shepard just nodded slowly, "What do you need from me?"

"Your memories concerning Miss Lawson." Rana put a small recording device on the table.

"Wouldn't it be easier to share them with you mind to mind?" Shepard glanced from the recorder to Rana curiously, having shared with the numerous asari the idea wasn't at all repulsive or foreign to her.

"You'd feel comfortable doing that?" Rana was surprised, few races were.

"Yes." Taking a sip from her wine she stood up to sit beside Rana.

"Well then, that _would_ be easier." Rana nodded, it would also show her far more about the enigma that was Commander Shepard than mere words and observations could. She turned to face the woman and offered her hand.

Shepard slid her hand into Rana's and leaned forward, gently pulling Rana closer to touch their foreheads together. Having shared with Liara the most she wasn't quite aware of how _intimate_ this position was for the asari or that she'd set Rana's heart racing.

Rana swallowed, pushing back the sudden spike of lust at being so close to the beautiful and powerful human. "Embrace eternity." she murmured and when her mind reached for Shepard's she found it open and ready for her.

Shepard ignored the lust and moved her mind around it with ease, she was used to it from Liara after all and figured it was just a part of sharing minds. She brought up to the fore of her mind the memories of her childhood with Miranda Solheim and shared them in their entirety with Rana.

It was very odd seeing the child _Persephone_ as Shepard. They were so different from each other.

The child was bright, bubbly, effervescent with light blonde hair and less refined features that were hidden beneath a childish cuteness and innocence that was utterly adorable.

The woman was quiet, reserved unless with companions she knew and trusted, that effervescence and innocence bottled away by the terrible things she'd seen and done and there was a darkness that lurked within Shepard that was not felt in Persephone's memories. It was caged away and heavily restrained but Rana could still sense it and it reminded her that what she was seeing now, this comfortable and strangely gentle woman, was incredibly dangerous if her ire was provoked. There was no doubt in her mind that if something happened to Miranda Lawson that inner beast that lurked within Shepard would be unleashed and the wrath of the goddess would pale in comparison.

The only similarity that Rana could see between Persephone and Stephanie was her eyes. She'd changed her hair, her body had changed as it matured but her eyes had remained the same in hue albeit they had matured as well. The open innocence of childhood had given way to the horrors of batarian brutality, of betrayal, of war and were now shuttered as though to keep all others from seeing into her blood drenched and battered soul.

But the problem with her eyes instigating an episode in Miranda was that in the face of a woman she loved so deeply Shepard's eyes softened, that window into her soul unshuttered and managed to reach beyond blood, brutality and anger to reflect some of that childhood innocence that clung desperately to her humanity, that time in her childhood where she had been truly happy, happy and loved and _safe_. It wasn't something Shepard could control or anticipate.

Then there was their biotics. Rana could already feel that Shepard's were different. It wasn't something she could truly place, a subtle scent that was out of place, like a human rose amidst a blood soaked battlefield. Feeling the effect of Miranda's biotics mingling with Shepard's was... intoxicating. It wasn't unheard of, albeit it was very rare, for biotics amongst asari to be 'compatible', the subtle variances in dark energy flows between individuals discovered to be on a same 'frequency', so to speak, making their merging a truly wondrous experience. For humans who had such limited biotics though, it _was_ unheard of. Especially given how unique Shepard's felt and that Miranda's had been engineered and implanted into her after her birth. It should be impossible.

It should also have been impossible for Shepard to have heard Miranda's thought. It was akin to sharing between asari as Shepard and Miranda's biotics had been mingling, yet in asari that sharing of minds was only made possible by their unique neural structure, something that humans _did not have._

_But my mind isn't normal for a human._ Shepard's voice whispered in response to Rana's musings.

_Nothing about you is normal Shepard._ Rana responded with a touch of awe within her wry mirth.

Shepard chuckled, _Not wrong there. Whatever was left of normal in me was changed by Cerberus in their upgrades._

_I'd like to study your mind along with Miranda's. There is... something there._ Rana couldn't find the words but in their sharing state Shepard could understand what was felt and not said.

_I'll do anything at all to help._ She whispered.

Rana released her mind with a profoundly changed perspective on the human woman who was both compassion and destruction. "Thank you for sharing so openly. It will most definitely help me in how I work with Miranda and I could also help _you_ understand more of your own mind and the changes to your biotics."

"I hope so Rana. I really hope so." Shepard sighed, returning to her lounge and sipping her wine lost in thought.


	27. Tainted

_**Losa136 asked an interesting question that I thought others might be interested in the answer for. I'd never read 'Unlocking Leli's Heart' so I did a quick read as you suggested, not finished yet but enough to get a basic idea of the bond between Kallian and Leliana. Seph and Miri's bond is not like that, Seph won't die if Miri does, they haven't had prophetic dreams about each other, they won't fall in love because of it in a week and Miri doesn't nullify Seph's abilities but rather enhances them. I can certainly understand the connection especially with Kallian being able to read aura's and Seph being able to see biotic aura's. They're similar yes, also similar to what Myetel uses in 'The Spirit of Redemption' but with Seph it's all dependent on the amount of dark energy within an individual, it's the dark energy itself she sees interacting with an individual hence some people are blindingly bright to her and others she can barely see. As for the details of the bond between Seph and Miri all I will say is patience, it will be revealed in greater detail as the story progresses. **_

**_Enjoy! :D_**

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><p>Shepard avoiding Miranda as they travelled to Illium was easily explained by the crew with the excuse that she was angry with the woman for knocking her out. Only Rana, Chakwas and Kasumi knew the truth though Jack was aware that Shepard wasn't angry over being knocked out. In fact Jack had the distinct impression that Shepard had been pleased, which made no sense whatsoever.<p>

As they travelled towards the nearest Relay, Shepard made a point to mingle with her crew, getting to know them was vital in building the necessary trust required for in the heat of battle. It also served as a distraction...

She played cards with Jack down in engineering and lost one hundred credits.

Got her hands dirty elbow deep in conduits with Ken and Gabby and got kicked out, as politely as possible, for getting distracted. Instead of scrubbing away the gunk that had built up from a leak Ken had fixed she scrubbed a _hole_ into the piping meaning the entire unit had to be replaced.

Sparred with Grunt, much to the consternation of Chakwas but she _didn't_ break her hands... only a couple ribs, her collar bone and a few other minor strains. But she had still beaten Grunt without using her biotics and left the cargo hold grinning from ear to ear.

After Chakwas patched her up she talked with Mordin about his time in the STG and some of the things they got up to.

Helped Jacob maintain and upgrade guns in the armoury and ended up comparing physical training techniques. This had Jacob showing off his abs to a totally oblivious Shepard who really thought Jacob was _just _demonstrating an asari upper body musculature stretch.

Had drinks with Kasumi and Kelly, which she dragged Chakwas out of her medbay for as well, and was mercilessly teased for being so oblivious to Jacob's flirting.

Her old friends didn't miss out either. She teased Garrus about his calibrations and spent some time sparring with him... she wasn't too beat up after Grunt after all, the medi-gel _had_ patched her up and her Cerberus upgrades meant she healed faster... she just didn't mention this little session to Chakwas and swore Garrus to secrecy. He didn't take much convincing to agree to that when Shepard had pinned him to the ground in a very compromising position.

She traded stories and insults with Massani especially concerning his unhealthy obsession with 'Jessie' to which he countered with her obsession with a certain operative's assets.

Kept Joker company up in the pilot's domain which also helped her to get to know EDI better, Joker's interactions with EDI were very amusing to watch as the AI baited him and he rose to it every time without fail.

And to top it all off she ate every meal down in the mess surrounded by her crew and listening to them. In the big group she shied away from being the centre of attention, which was easier said than done when everyone wanted her opinion on everything. So she'd sit at the edges and speak only when spoken to. She was quite good at deflecting things onto a more outgoing individual like Garrus or Kasumi or Massani.

But as busy as she forced herself to be her glance tended to end up in the direction of Miranda's quarters. Her XO had locked herself away with Rana to get as much done as possible before they reached Illium so they had a clear idea of what they had to do. She wondered if Miranda had any idea at all just how much she wanted to help, wanted to be in there with her, hell even if it was just to deliver a coffee or something. However Miranda had made it crystal clear that she was to stay away.

Her heart just _ached_. For so long she'd thought she'd never see Miri again, would never get to watch the stars with her, or play the piano with her, or dance with her in the rain or under the moon or on a ridiculously expensive rooftop, or hear her laugh at stupid childish jokes... hmmm she doubted _that_ would happen again. Yet miraculously they'd been brought back together again against all odds only to be separated by someone's cruel and twisted manipulations. It was breaking her heart and Miranda had absolutely no idea. She didn't know if they could ever be lovers again given how much they'd both changed and grown, but friendship... she most definitely wanted her best friend back, she had so few of those these days each one was treasured by her.

In those moments Kasumi would sidle up to her and either link arms with Shepard or poke her with a cheeky grin and pop some random question to her. Shepard didn't know how Kasumi always seemed to know or that no one else in the crew had picked up on it. But she was ever so grateful to the young Japanese woman who took the time to distract her when she needed it most.

Making port on Illium had been a very smooth process. Some mysterious benefactor had paid their docking fees for them and gotten them a nice private berth. A bit unsettled by that Shepard was waiting by the airlock with Garrus, Jacob and Kasumi fighting down her nervous energy with some playful banter with the thief.

"Shep it's _Illium_ not _Omega_. Why don't you wear something _nice_?" Kasumi complained at her.

"There isn't a single place I've been in the last ten _years_ or so that someone hasn't tried to kill me. This, my friend," she gestured to her armour, "is _nice_. State of the art shielding, ceramic plating, internal cushioning that doesn't impede movement." she flexed her right arm in demonstration.

Kasumi rolled her eyes.

"I even like the colouring, brings out my eyes." she grinned and received a light punch to the shoulder.

"Hopeless. You are hopeless. You've got the sexiest pair of legs, a gorgeous behind that even Garrus can't keep his eyes off,"

At that the turian cleared his throat and flushed while Jacob fought back a chuckle,

"very nicely proportioned assets and you hide it all away under that heavy plating." Kasumi wrapped her knuckles on the chest piece knowing that any comment about her looks would have Shepard blushing.

And Shepard did indeed blush, a very deep shade of crimson in fact.

Miranda was the one to rescue her, unintended of course as she might have joined in the teasing if she'd known. "Commander, I've forwarded the contact and location information to your workstation."

Shepard turned to look at her and the butterflies burst to life in her stomach. Today was hopefully the day they'd find out just how extensive Miranda's mind had been toyed with and how long it would take to undo. "Thanks. Garrus, Jacob and Kasumi will be going with you." her tone was commanding, it was an order to be followed and not a suggestion.

Miranda frowned, she noted the blush and wondered what she had interrupted, "That won't be necessary Commander." Jacob she could understand sending with her being Cerberus and all but Garrus and Kasumi?

"Hell it isn't. We've got no idea who did this, the fact that they've managed to do it within the last four years while you've been with Cerberus, and for half that time locked away on a secured Cerberus station, means they _can_ reach you no matter how 'secure' you think you are." Shepard argued firmly.

Miranda had been so busy concentrating on _fixing_ herself she hadn't truly had time to think of that aspect.

"What's to say they won't try to stop you fixing this when they've clearly gone to a lot of trouble to make it happen in the first place?" The very idea of someone getting to Miranda on her watch incensed Shepard.

Miranda could see her getting worked up, that clenching of her jaw, the fire in her eyes, the stiffness in which she held herself.

"I won't let that happen. Jacob, Garrus and Kasumi are going keep an eye out so you can concentrate solely on fixing this. I want you..." her eyes widened slightly and her cheeks reddened as she had been about to say I want you _back_, "safe, I want you safe." she corrected herself but it was too late, everyone knew she'd been about to say something else. Flustered and embarrassed she turned and quickly left the ship before anything else could be said, she _knew_ Garrus and Kasumi would be teasing her about it sooner or later.

Miranda rolled her eyes a little and strode out, leading her squad to the Cerberus medical research facility. It was dedicated to the understanding of biotics and would have the equipment necessary to study her neurological state in depth.

Having found out from the port authorities that _Liara _had paid for the berth an excited Shepard had made her way quickly through the market. She was oblivious to the many asari who had found themselves distracted by the startling lone human woman in high grade military armour. As on the Citadel they were drawn by her confident swagger. That slender battle toned physique which had her traversing through the crowded stalls with grace yet authority. The scars that marred her beautiful face and told of some great trauma she had endured and conquered. Finally there was an indefinable aura surrounding her that was the true reason asari were drawn to Shepard like moths to flame.

At the door to the lavish office of the clearly successful information broker that Liara T'Soni had become Shepard hesitated. What was she to say to the woman who had loved her but she'd never allowed herself to love in return? At that time Miranda had been nothing but a lost childhood dream. It hadn't been because of Miranda that she'd refused to entertain the notion of falling for the gorgeous, gentle, socially inept and utterly adorable young scientist. It had been fear of corrupting her, of defiling or even _destroying _that innocence and gentleness in Liara with the violence, the bloodshed the dark and feral beast she kept caged deep within herself.

Oh Shepard _did_ love Liara in her own way and if she'd been human and not wanting to meld minds she could have actually entertained the idea of an intimate relationship. Hell if it hadn't been for Liara she probably would have gone after Williams, especially after becoming a Spectre and fraternization regs didn't truly apply to her any more. Williams was more of her type than Liara, strong, proud, talented, gorgeous brunette with a killer right hook... much like Miranda come to think of it. Liara had been so _opposite _she had felt drawn to her though. In fact most of the crew on the Normandy had truly thought they were in a physical relationship. Which was why Garrus had questioned her about her relationship with Liara in light of her sharing some of her past feelings towards Miranda with him.

Now here she stood, rather pathetically considering her eagerness to get here, hesitating at Liara's doorstep at a complete loss of what to say. Two _years_ had passed. Two years she had been dead. Two years Liara had mourned for her. Two years, four months to just turn up out of the blue. Shepard blinked at that thought. Liara had _arranged_ their berth and paid for it. How in the stars had she even _known_ that Shepard was alive?

Scowling a little in confusion it gave her the motion required to pass through the threshold and into the comfortable office that wasn't as lavish in decore as the reception area. There was her desk designed for function and not purely aesthetics, though asari styles seemed to automatically contain an inbuilt sense of aesthetic design. Two padded leather seats, cup shape and armless faced her desk for her clients. The space itself wasn't overly large but wasn't tiny either, the desk and chairs fit spaciously but additional chairs, a larger desk or a bulky art piece would make it feel cramped. To the left of the desk was a holographic communication console, on which Liara was finishing up a call.

"Have you ever faced an asari commando unit before? Few humans have." Liara's voice purred darkly, dangerously and the human man she was speaking with cowered slightly. "You will pay me what you owe or I will flay you alive... with my _mind._" she growled menacingly and ended the communication.

Shepard took a half step back in shock. Those were the words of her mother, of Matriarch Benezia, of the _indoctrinated_ second in command of Saren. Those were the words spoken on the day Shepard had been forced to kill her. To fight her way through asari commando's and geth while struggling through the biotic force the powerful Matriarch had hurled at them again and again. In her final moments the Matriarch had gained enough control over her mind to confess the true nature of Saren, of the Reaper Sovereign and gave them the information they needed to chase them through the Mu relay. She had passed into the embrace of the goddess willingly and with her own mind in the end, even managing to tell Liara she was so very proud of her daughter, her Little Wing.

Now here Liara was. Channelling that very darkness of her indoctrinated mother simply to force a client to pay her credits. A darkness Shepard had tried so desperately to keep from her. What the fuck had happened to her?

Liara turned and suddenly realized she wasn't alone. A dark expression crossed her face and she was about to flare her biotics at the intrusion when the intruder held up her hands submissively with a small smile. "Stephanie!" the darkness vanished from Liara and she lightly stepped towards Shepard with a gorgeous smile and open arms.

Shepard smiled, though it didn't reach her eyes, she stepped into Liara's embrace and received a tender kiss on the cheek from the young asari. "Liara." she murmured softly.

Liara pulled back a little and reached up to caress Shepard's cheek, searching those incredible amber eyes that could show deep emotion one moment then be completely impenetrable walls the next. She frowned a little as instead of the expected, the hoped for, emotion of seeing her for the first time she was looking into the golden walls. "It's so good to see you. I'd heard you were alive but finally seeing you, feeling you..." she leaned forward and touched her forehead against Shepard's.

"It's good to see you to Liara, but I haven't exactly announced that I'm alive yet. How _did_ you know?" Shepard asked curiously, trying to relax as this was _Liara_ holding her.

"I'm an information broker now." Liara pulled back, a little hurt at Shepard's stiffness, what had happened to her? Was she alright? Was she... as she was before or had Cerberus made alterations? That thought made her cringe with guilt inside. She walked over to her desk, "It's paid the bills since you..." she swallowed, unable to say it.

Shepard smiled, "Went to have a heart to heart with the goddess?"

Liara looked up at her quickly, sensing she was teasing but not able to find any humour in the situation herself.

"You know I think I must have offended her or pissed her off to be kicked out and back here again. Did you know I wasn't even finished when I nearly got my arse blown up all over again? She was so eager to get rid of me I had to fight my way off a mech infested station with atrophied muscles, still open 'scars', changed biotics and one hell of a headache because some idiot thought he'd make a few creds selling my expensive arse to the Shadow Broker." she shrugged and sat down with casual ease and expecting at least a smile and return light hearted comment about her whining or 'is that all' or a 'perhaps she wanted you back'. Instead that darkness returned to Liara's eyes and it wasn't the 'embrace eternity' kind.

"The Shadow Broker has a _lot_ to answer for." Liara growled but silently she was cursing Cerberus, they were supposed to have kept Shepard _safe_.

Shepard's smile gave way to concern, "That sounds like you've had a run in with them." she sat forward, "Are you in trouble or something? Is there anything I can do to help?" her offer was instant and deeply sincere.

For half a moment Liara's eyes melted. Her Shepard was still there. Her Shepard who would leap through fire. Would stand between her and a storm of bullets. Would hold her so tenderly even with all her strength and ask with the gentlest of whispers if she was alright. Then her eyes hardened, "I am not in trouble, but you could say the Shadow Broker is."

Shepard pursed her lips and her brow furrowed, "What do you mean?"

"The reason I am an information broker is not just to pay the bills." Liara sat straighter, her shoulders squared, her blue eyes dark and focussed like piercing spears. "I was on a job with a friend. The Shadow Broker's people ambushed us, almost killed me but my friend gave himself to allow me to escape. He was taken."

A measure of understanding lit Shepard's eyes, "So now you're hunting the Shadow Broker."

Liara nodded stiffly, "Now I'm hunting the Shadow Broker." she acknowledged.

Shepard stood and walked around behind the desk, turning Liara's seat and kneeling before the surprised asari. Taking Liara's hands in hers she brought them to her lips, eyes closed as she kissed those hands that had caressed her in her darkest struggles. Soothed her rage when not even her music or punching bag could. Healed her in the aftermath of a groundside fight that had gone awry and Chakwas and the Normandy were too far away.

Liara swallowed, unsure what Shepard was doing and the feel of those soft lips brushing her knuckles, those strong and powerful hands holding her so gently set her heart racing.

Shepard finally looked up, not releasing Liara's hands, when she spoke her husky voice was soft but laden with pleading desperation, "Liara, angel, please don't become what you hunt."

Liara scowled and pulled her hands away, her heart pounding harder as she warred within herself at such a heartfelt plea from the woman she had loved so deeply. "Says the one working for _Cerberus_." she spat with unintended venom.

Shepard recoiled as though she'd been slapped, her eyes wide not at the insult itself but _how _it had been delivered. She recovered quickly and rose, her entire face becoming a blank mask and amber eyes that usually danced for Liara and let her in like no one else were now closed. "It was _not_ my choice to work with Cerberus, I _had no choice_. People are _dying _Liara. Hundreds of thousands abducted by Collectors and the Alliance and Council are doing shit all to stop them. I might be accepting the tools Cerberus gives me but I _am not Cerberus_. I _refuse_ to join their xenophobic cause and lust for power against all others. I _refuse_ to do things _their way_."

Liara bit her lip and her eyes glistened with tears, an overwhelming wave of guilt crashing through her at Shepard's clipped and furious tone.

Shepard activated her omni-tool and sent Liara the dossiers for Samara and Thane. "Seeing as you're an information broker to _pay the bills_. I'm looking for these two people if you want to earn some more credits. Cerberus will pay your fees so you can hold off your asari commando's and flaying me with your mind. I'm sure you know how to contact me should you find anything." she nodded curtly then just turned and left.

If she'd stayed she would have seen Liara crumple, her shoulders wracked with sobs, tears streaming down her face. If she'd stayed she would have asked what had truly happened to Liara to bring out such anger and darkness, for what she'd described wasn't enough to explain the change. If she'd stayed calm she would have noticed Liara's assistant Nyxeris paying far too much attention to what had been going on in that room.

But she hadn't.

Liara's words had cut more deeply than any wound she had ever received.

She had tried so desperately to keep her darkness from tainting Liara. She had denied the love Liara had wanted to share with her. She had been so cautious in the melds to figure out the Prothean Cipher and message from the beacon that Liara had not even _felt_ that beast inside her. But it had not been enough. What else could possibly explain why Liara had channelled Matriarch Benezia at her darkest hour?

On top of that were her already too high levels of anxiety in regards to Miranda, her inner struggle over losing so much of her past and the constant strain to hold on to her humanity amidst the sea of the Prothean Cipher that dwarfed her human mind and that inner beast that threatened to overwhelm her in the face of bloody violence against the innocent. For Liara was right about one thing, she had changed. She was no longer the Stephanie Shepard she had been on the day she died. Even back then, which was only a bare couple of weeks ago to her, she had already been changing.

The question was just what was she changing _to?_


	28. Copied and Pasted

Shepard wandered the markets. She did not want to return to the Normandy right now, the _Cerberus_ vessel. She did not want to see all those logos, granted they'd been getting fewer by the day. The desire to go pummel Grunt had been strong but stronger was the knowledge that going to beat him up every time she got angry was not setting a good example for the young krogan. Of course if she'd had a clearer mind she would have countered that argument quite convincingly. That in fact channelling the aggression in a controlled environment with an opponent of similar strengths, or at least could handle the punishment, was better than unleashing the anger on some poor unfortunate who was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or going ten rounds with a punching bag and _losing._ But clear minded she was not and it was in this state that a female voice called out to her.

"Shepard is that you!"

Shepard stopped, head jerking in the direction the voice had come from.

"It IS you!" A grinning Gianna Parasini strode up to her with a bounce in her step and hand outstretched in greeting.

Shepard smiled, "Gianna." she returned the greeting and clasped hands with the Noveria Internal Affairs investigator.

"Wow, the news said you were dead. What happened?" She asked enthusiastically in her gravelly middle class accented voice. Then she registered just who she was talking to and released Shepard's hands holding up her own and shaking her head, "No wait, probably classified, don't worry about it I never asked." she grinned.

"Actually it's not classified as far as I'm aware but it's a bit of a long story." Shepard shrugged, the friendly warmth and excitement in Gianna was... soothing.

"Well in that case I believe I owe you a beer for your help with Anoleius who is currently serving a very long time in a white collar prison." Gianna winked, "If you've got time that is, I know you're a busy woman."

Shepard straightened her shoulders and nodded, "You know what Gianna, I'd _love_ a beer right now, better than that a brandy."

Gianna chuckled, "Tough day huh?" she gestured for Shepard to follow.

"Yeah." Shepard didn't elaborate and followed Gianna's slender and much more comfortably clad form through the market. The woman had complained about having to wear uncomfortable dresses for her last assignment and now donned a simple but nice burgandy and white form fitting suit that fit right in with the general attire of this area of Illium. She was obviously on a job but what would Noveria IA want out here? Honestly Shepard didn't really care, a familiar face and a few drinks just sounded good right now.

Gianna took them to Eternity, a nice bar that had enough people for this time of day to show it was popular but not too crowded to make it uncomfortable. Asari, humans, turians, salarians even a couple quarians lounged around the different tables, it was too early for any drunken louts so there was just the hum of people enjoying themselves and some nice, soft background music.

It took a few drinks for Shepard to begin to unwind. Gianna proved to be very amiable company indeed. Probably from having worked under cover for so long she could strike up conversation with anyone and knew how to put them at ease. Shepard didn't mind at all that Gianna was using a few of her work charms, having Miranda's example to work from she could generally pick when someone was trying to manipulate her. Sometimes it wasn't so bad to be manipulated like this, she wasn't unaware of it but she did allow it to relax her.

"So, Cerberus huh." Gianna would never have picked it, not after meeting Shepard on Noveria, the fiery Spectre on a mission of utmost importance and high morals that had refused to be dragged into Noverian corporate infighting.

"I _hate_ Cerberus. Their morals and ideals are corrupted so much that even highly intelligent people who should know better just can't see. They're so blinded by the 'advancing humanity' crap they don't even realize the _harm_ they're doing to our race. It's all for the power of _one man_." Shepard growled into her shot of Ice Brandy.

Gianna considered her for a long moment. Reading people was a huge part of her job, reading them and listening to what was said and what wasn't. "You need them though." it was part statement part question.

"They're the _only_ ones willing to give me a ship, crew and resources to take on the Collectors. If it wasn't for that I'd be hunting down the Illusive Man himself to put a bullet between his eyes." she clenched her jaw, her eyes glowing angrily and she knew it, she kept her gaze firmly on her poor defenceless drink. Liara's words burning through her mind.

"So when you're done with the Collectors do it." Gianna shrugged as if it was the simplest thing in the world.

At that Shepard looked up, a little confused.

Gianna leaned forward and met those strange eyes, "Look, it's like what I do for a living. I have to play a role, dress the part, talk the part, make the people around me think I _am_ the part. But I have a purpose, I'm there to stop people breaking the law. Sometimes the roles I play mean that I have to break laws in order to get in close to my targets. Then once I'm done, once I've caught them and my purpose is complete I get to go home, to shake off the role and be myself again." she sat back and looked out the window to her left.

"And how do you do that, be yourself again?" Shepard asked softly.

"There are times that's easier said than done, like if I've been undercover for a long period of time. I have to purge myself. I binge on the things that make me, me."

Shepard listened intently to every word she was saying.

"I eat my favourite meal, a great big pepperoni pizza with beer." Gianna grinned, "Put on my favourite music, wear my favourite clothes, watch my favourite movie, listen to recordings of my family and friends, read my favourite book. I surround myself with the things that are me, that are special to me." she answered the question easily. It was something she faced at the end of every assignment after all. "Sure there are sometimes I'm with my family and friends and I forget I'm not undercover any more. It can be hard and can feel like they're not actually my family or I have no idea what to say to them." her dark brown eyes returned to the riveted ambers of Shepard that had thankfully stopped glowing that eerie red, "It just takes time to acclimatize, to return back into being me. My sister is my lifeline. She's the only one who knows what I really do and when I'm struggling she just... knows. After some jobs I don't know how I'd have found myself again if not for her." she shook her head but was smiling at the thought of her younger sister.

"You're so lucky." Shepard sighed wistfully. "You have a family and home to go back to. For so long my family has been the Alliance, my home packed in my duffle bag and moved from ship to ship." she looked away, lost in her memories, "Almost everything I treasured was destroyed on the Normandy... and not just what fit in my duffle bag. The Alliance and the Council hung me out to dry and the only ones who're showing an ounce of support are terrorists I never _wanted_ anything to do with that didn't involve blowing them up."

Gianna's heart broke a little for the ache she could _feel_ in the powerful, famous and misunderstood woman before her. "So find something. One thing that you can hold on to. Grab it with everything you have and don't let go until you're ready and not when someone tells you to." It was really the only piece of advice she could give and it worked for her.

Shepard became very thoughtful as she contemplated that thought. Something that was uniquely her.

After a few more shots Gianna was looking at her in wonder. "Damn you hold your liquor girl."

Shepard shrugged, "I could skull the entire bottle and won't even get a tingle because of the Cerberus upgrades. I haven't had the time to try out how much it'd take to get me drunk but just thinking about it makes me queasy."

"Can't get drunk huh, that's got to be a capital offense somewhere." Gianna chuckled, her cheeks were a little coloured from the beers she'd had. "Hey wanna help me on a job? It's real easy I swear, I just can't do it because the target will recognize me."

Shepard smiled, "Why the hell not."

A short while later she'd sweet talked an asari into not only showing her an illegal prototype biotic amp that was still in development on Noveria but with a little flirtation she'd even managed to get a significant discount for the shop.

Then Gianna swooped in victoriously to the horror and dismay of the asari. As the asari scrambled away Gianna cupped the side of her mouth, "Talk fast Hermia, when the fines hit you won't be able to _afford_ him!" she called smugly.

Shepard grinned, "That was fun."

Gianna laughed, "I _love_ nailing asari. So ageless and superior, then when you get them they squeal like little girls."

Shepard chuckled, "They really do don't they."

"Thanks for that Shepard. You ever need a hand with anything I can help with, let me know." Gianna extended her hand, she had reports to file now.

Shepard shook the offered hand warmly, "Thanks Gianna, I'll keep that in mind. Have fun making Hermia squirm."

Gianna's eyes glinted with mischief, "Oh I will. Good luck with the Collectors and stuff."

With that they parted ways, Shepard feeling a damn sight better than after she'd left Liara's office. Taking her time to return to the ship she stopped off to buy some more fish and models, something constructive to pass the time with while she waited for information from Miranda about her condition and Liara about their targets.

Shepard sat in Miranda's office in numb silence as her mind processed what Rana had just told her.

Miranda was pacing angrily at the foot of her bed.

"So you're saying that someone discovered how to..." she fumbled for language she understood to interpret the scientific explanation of Rana's, "disconnect specific memory pathways. Which means that Miranda can't make the right connections to link memories even though the memories are all still there."

"Basically." Rana nodded.

"If they can target memories like that why not just erase them if they don't want her to remember me?" Shepard was confused, not truly understanding this at all.

It was a question that had Miranda on edge as well.

"I can't answer that, I can only tell you what we found." Rana shook her head, she had no way to speculate on the motives of the people behind this.

"So does the wrong connections thing explain why I can be dropping significant hints and she doesn't get it?" Shepard asked Rana slowly.

"I'm right _here_ Shepard." Miranda growled.

"I am aware of that, your heels are giving me a headache with all your pacing." Shepard growled right back at her.

Miranda stopped pacing and glared at her silently.

"Yes. Two things will trigger an overstimulation of pain. The first is telling her outright who you are. The second is to visually remind her of who you are, which is why your eyes are problematic." Rana summarized what their tests had shown in answer to Shepard's question.

"_Problematic_." Shepard huffed despondently. "Can you treat this?"

"It will take time..." Rana hedged.

"Weeks if not months." Miranda sunk down into her work chair, her shoulders slumped minutely. "We don't have time."

"Then we'll _make_ time." Shepard asserted instantly.

"What think you can write the Collectors a message asking them to hold off their attacks while you fix the mind of your broken XO?" Miranda scoffed, masking her pain behind angry sarcasm.

Shepard surged to her feet and stormed over to the console, slamming her clenched fists down with a resounding bang and her eyes blazing red she yelled at Miranda furiously, "You are _NOT_ broken!"

Miranda sat back in surprise, her eyes wide and lips slightly parted at the outburst.

"You are _NOT_ a tool to be used and discarded! I don't care if you think that to make yourself feel better but you're a bloody human being Miranda. Shit goes wrong in our bodies that we can't control. Yes someone's purposefully messed with your brain but it _can_ be treated, and until you've fully recovered we _can_ manage this." Shepard clenched her fists on the desk so hard she drew blood as her fingernails cut into the palms of her hands.

Miranda found her voice to shoot back, "We'll _have_ to find a way to manage this because tool or not this," rising to her own feet so she didn't feel so vulnerable she gestured between them, "is a risk. Think rationally Commander, we have no idea when or where the Collectors will strike again. It could be in a couple weeks it could be tomorrow and we must be ready. We haven't even got all of the specialists yet."

"I told you I'd do whatever it takes and I meant it." Shepard growled, "Two of the specialists are here on Illium and I've got Liara looking for them." she didn't feel it wise to add that she _hoped_ Liara was looking for them. "Then there's just Tali and Ash and both have missions to wind up before they're ready for this. In the mean time we'll be here for as long as it takes to find Samara and Thane so _use it_. I have Massani, Jack and Grunt if I need any backup for anything and I highly doubt we'll be seeing any heavy action that will require the full squad." Shepard straightened, pulling away from the console and searching those cool cobalt blue eyes.

"I will not delay our mission but until you locate and recruit Samara and Thane I will undergo treatments. As soon as they're found and we have confirmation that Tali and Ashleigh William's have concluded their business we leave." Miranda reasoned curtly.

Shepard nodded knowing that that was the best she could hope for with the stubborn mission focussed woman, "Agreed."

Seeing the pair like that had reminded Rana of what the little human woman Kasumi had warned her, _not_ to get between them if they started fighting. Now she understood why. Clearing her throat she got their attention, "There is something else."

Miranda frowned while Shepard waited with a feeling of dread in her stomach.

"Miranda can you identify this?" Rana activated her omni-tool and sent an image to the operatives console.

Miranda studied her screen for a moment, "That's an anomaly in Shepard's brain."

"Actually, that's _your_ brain, Miranda. You and Shepard both have this anomaly." Rana corrected her. Miranda had been so focussed on the problem area of her brain she hadn't taken into account the rest of it.

Shepard turned to Miranda slowly, she was fighting internally not to let her rage consume her as Miranda might not have been the one to put this anomaly in her brain.

Miranda was working quickly, bringing up Shepard's neural images beside her own. "This anomaly was documented by Chakwas _before_ project Lazarus before you go jumping to conclusions." She advised, already feeling the surge within Shepard.

Shepard held her tongue, not trusting what she'd say right now.

"We could never figure it out and assumed it to be related to the changes the Prothean beacons and Cipher made to you." Miranda sat back down, staying that anxiety that was churning in the pit of her stomach through working her mind analytically on the problem. "In reconstructing you I ensured that everything was exactly like your last physical, including all the things I and other experts in varying fields just couldn't explain. Yes there were some things we upgraded but they were all based on what you already had, not replacing anything."

Shepard mulled that over in her head, "So someone who _does_ know what this anomaly does copied it from my scans and recreated it in you while they were altering your memory pathways?"

Miranda clenched her jaw, "Damnit. If only we still had the station logs, they might have left _something_ behind to identify them with."

"I'm beginning to wonder if in fact Wilson was working for the Shadow Broker or for someone _else _seeing as the scuttling was a result of _his_ actions." Shepard mused wryly.

Miranda's face snapped up in surprise then anger, "That bastard! He _would_ have had access to everything, to all your data and to me." she realized what Shepard had just deduced herself.

"So we figure out who he was working for." Shepard was loathe to go to Liara to ask for her help but it might just come to that. "But that will be an investigation for someone else at this point in time, we've got other things to worry about. Like..."

Miranda frowned slightly as Shepard's eyes went far away for a long moment, but she did not intrude on Shepard's thoughts as Shepard would share them when she was ready.

"Okay so someone, assuming Wilson was taking orders from this someone, has given us the _same_ neurological anomaly and they altered your memory so you can't recognize who I am but _didn't_ alter _my_ memory pathways. Why didn't they alter mine?" she asked suddenly, her eyes came back into focus and she looked to Miranda.

"Other than I would have caught that?" Miranda frowned at her, she had been highly protective over Shepard during her reconstruction after all. "Any alterations to your brain chemistry could cause catastrophic damage to your mind. Your brain is no longer entirely human and with the Cipher implanted in your mind your neural pathways are infinitely more complex. I had wanted to study it more on the Lazarus station once you'd woken but with the betrayal then Freedom's Progress..." Miranda shook her head, it was a very interesting question though. "Perhaps whatever the purpose behind this memory block is, it only takes one of us not to remember." she sighed and sat back, rubbing her right temple absently. She couldn't help this nagging sense of inferiority that it had been _her_ that had been deemed acceptable to alter, the perfect human specimen.

"But why? Why do this when they obviously _knew_ we'd be working together, that _I'd_ know of our past and try to get you to remember me." Shepard continued in frustration, "Hell the most logical assumption they could have made was that when we first met face to face I'd tell you who I am, you'd have had an aneurism and died right then." she gestured to Miranda angrily.

Miranda shook her head, "It's been gradually intensifying. I would assume that if you _had_ told me back then I would have dismissed it and not believed you, I probably would even now to some degree. I still find it incredibly hard to believe that we knew each other yet I know logically that it makes sense, especially given everything you know about me." she glanced at Shepard, "And how emotionally invested you are in having my mind restored." she added, her voice a touch softer.

Shepard stilled a little, that did explain why Miranda had been so flippant about her childhood. "And when you _do_ get your mind restored you'll understand why." she turned her gaze back to Rana, "Any other surprises?"

Rana nodded, "Given that Miranda's biotics were implanted after birth you may be interested in knowing that you are biotically synchronized to each other."

"What?" Miranda gaped at the asari doctor.

"Both of you operate on the exact same dark energy frequency, you are not just highly compatible, but _perfectly_ compatible and that's why you work so effectively together. If you tried to do that _swarp_ thing you do with someone else it wouldn't have nearly as much effect." Rana looked between those faces, Shepard wasn't nearly as surprised as Miranda as she'd had a little warning from Rana's musings during their sharing.

Miranda was floored, to say the least. It took her a moment to process that and its possible ramifications. "Did you manifest your biotics before or after my operation?" she asked Shepard softly.

"Before." Shepard glanced at her, wondering what she was thinking.

"Was it known that you were such a high potential biotic?"

"Highest on record, it was why I was sent to your school when my family didn't come from money like everyone else." Shepard answered softly.

"So my father had your biotics copied and implanted into me." Miranda felt sick to her stomach.

Shepard moved to walk around the work station to console Miranda but was stopped by a quick shake of Miranda's head.

"Don't. I'd like you both to leave." She asserted crisply, not looking at either of them but her face a stern mask hiding the empty ache she felt inside.

Rana quietly got up and left.

Shepard hesitated, "Miranda..."

"Shepard don't. Just go, please." Miranda whispered, she did _not_ want to get emotional in front of the Commander.

Shepard was torn, the emotional pain was rolling off Miranda in waves and crashing straight into her heart. Did she do as Miranda wanted and leave or push through it? Miranda's pride was a beast in its own right, it would rage at appearing weak in front of another like this. Bowing her head she exhaled a pent up breath as she turned and left as requested.

As soon as the door shut and locked Miranda broke down into tears. Everything about her was copied and pasted from others. The best genes from the best sources money could buy. There was absolutely nothing about her that was unique, that was _Miranda._ It had been almost bearable knowing that even if her biotics had been paid for by her father they'd been her own. Now she discovered even that had been copied, from none other than Commander Stephanie Shepard herself.

Being so distraught she didn't pay attention to EDI's advisory notice that Commander Shepard had left the ship so she was in charge.

* * *

><p><em><strong>So some confirmations of what I'm sure you'd picked up on already, some hopefully unforeseen revelations and no we're not finished with this yet. This just seemed a good place to end this particular chapter. More on just how they're going to be treating Miranda for this coming up soon!<strong>_

_**Oh and Hopelessly Blue... again with the no private messaging! ;) But num num num for the muffins. Glad you're enjoying the drama, really could change the sci-fi to drama or angst couldn't I. I am a Liara fan to so it wasn't easy writing that chapter especially considering how torn up and guilt ridden Liara feels about it. But truthfully she's yet to feel the burn of Seph's anger. Looking forward to the reviews ;)**_

_**:)**_


	29. Professional Distance Airlocked

Miranda was pacing by the airlock. They were supposed to be going to the research facility to study Shepard's biotics and how they interact with the anomaly in her brain to see if there was any clue as to what it was for and what impact it would have on Miranda. But Shepard was late.

"EDI where's Shepard?" she finally demanded.

"In the Loft Operative Lawson." EDI answered calmly.

That was it. Miranda stormed back to the elevator, her arms crossed and her toe tapping in sheer frustration at the woman as she impatiently waited to ascend to the Loft. Time was of the essence and Shepard was _wasting_ it. Barging into the Loft she looked around and determined that Shepard was in the bathroom. About to storm in she stopped herself at the door. Images of the last time she'd burst into the Commander's bathroom flashing across her mind.

Anger abating a little she cleared her throat and knocked, "Shepard is everything okay?" she called through the closed door.

A moment later came the surprisingly unsteady response, "Yeah. I'll... meet you there Miranda."

Miranda hesitated. With her own anger subdued she could feel a deep sense of loss that wasn't her own. Shepard was clearly not okay. That growing sense of concern for her Commander urged her to go in anyway. She stepped through the door into the bathroom and found Shepard once again staring at her reflection. This time she had a towel around her though and her chocolate brown hair was damp but brushed into a semblance of order.

"I thought we agreed if you came into my bathroom to yell at me while I'm naked you'd have to abide by the same dress code." Shepard deadpanned, not looking at Miranda just yet.

"Perhaps when we don't have an appointment to keep." Miranda quipped thinking it was an attempt at humour and analysing Shepard closely. There were no tears, was no look of horror, her back was straight with her shoulders squared and her gaze was lingering on the reflection of her face. "I can feel you're not okay Stephanie. What is it?" her tone was soft though the question was abrupt. She watched as Shepard's brow furrowed and she looked frustrated or anxious, Miranda couldn't decide which.

"Yesterday you were devastated about finding out we share biotics and demanded I leave. I respected that even though all I wanted to do was be there for you." Shepard voice was soft and huskier than normal, she didn't register that Miranda had called her by her first name.

Miranda stiffened and felt her heart beat faster, Shepard was getting angry, she could feel it beginning to swirl through the ache even though her voice was soft.

"Today _I_ asked you to leave but you ignored me and came in anyway." that soft voice began to growl slightly.

Miranda's brow furrowed and she took a deep breath, taking a moment to understand the ache, anger and _hurt_ she was feeling in Shepard. She hadn't wanted to look weak in front of Commander Shepard and here she was barging in on a vulnerable Shepard who didn't want to appear weak in front of _her. _ "I apologize Commander." she turned to leave but was stopped by Shepard's low voice.

"Should I have stayed?" she asked softly, so softly Miranda almost missed it as the door swished open.

The thought of Shepard consoling her was a little mortifying, the great Commander and hero seeing her so weak and emotionally unstable. But right now and back then it had been _Shepard_ who had been broken, and she'd walked away to leave Shepard alone... isolated from everything she knew and feeling trapped by an organization she abhorred. "You told me to get out last time." she reminded, her voice cool to hide the feeling of guilt that was creeping through her.

Shepard closed her eyes and bowed her head a little as the tears welled, "Last time you had been the cause of... your choices were directly responsible for what I was going through." she murmured.

The guilt intensified in both of them.

"Am I..." Shepard's voice was a whisper and choked with emotion, "Is it my fault?"

Miranda hesitated, what exactly was Shepard referring to, "Is what your fault Stephanie?"

"The biotics, the mental block, the brain anomaly... they're all to do with _me_ and they're-they're..." she couldn't hold back the tears and turned her back on Miranda with a choked out, "Goddess..."

Miranda tossed all thoughts of leaving the anguished and guilt ridden woman out of her mind and strode over to her. Reaching up she gently held Shepard's bare shoulder, swallowing at the increased surge of emotions just like on Purgatory, she reached out to soothe Shepard. "It's _not_ your fault. Others have done these things to me, others who've sought to make to make me the perfect tool and have used parts of you to do that."

Shepard sobbed as that didn't make her feel better at all given how Miranda felt about that.

"I don't blame you or hold you responsible for any of this." Miranda meant every word and hoped that Shepard could feel that, she gave Shepard's shoulder a gentle squeeze of encouragement.

The stiff tension in Shepard's shoulders eased a little as she felt the sincerity of Miranda's words flowing into her and that tender gesture that was surprising from the normally cold woman.

Miranda could sense it wasn't enough to breach that wall of chaotic emotions swirling through Shepard though, "I really _am_ sorry about your scars..."

Shepard shook her head, "You couldn't have known how I felt about them, but you _should_ have known how important it is to remember the journey you've been on."

Miranda was caught by surprise as Shepard turned and looked up at her, something wasn't quite right and it wasn't seeing the tears on her face...

"Doesn't matter if it was shit, it still plays a part in who you are by _how_ you respond to it and the choices you make because of it." Shepard was pulling herself together quickly now with the help of Miranda's encouragement and the fact that she'd _stayed_. "I _may_ be a mess right now but I have no intention of staying this way. I just need to... process." she frowned at Miranda's suddenly changed expression and the new surge of emotions that rippled through the woman, "What?"

Miranda gently reached up to touch Shepard's warm, damp cheek looking into her eyes. Her _dark brown_ eyes. Gone were those beautiful golden amber hues and with them a light seemed to have dimmed within Shepard.

Shepard had not expected to feel a powerful _ache_ from Miranda's heart that mingled through her own tumbling emotions suddenly and without warning.

"What have you done?" Miranda managed to breathe, shocked and dismayed by what she was seeing, what she was _feeling _from Shepard. She was still reeling from being able to feel the other woman's emotions so strongly, as though they were her own somehow.

"I told you I'd do whatever it took. My eyes were the cause of..." Shepard's voice hitched in her throat and the tears welled again.

With Miranda's hand on Shepard's cheek and their highly emotional states raging, their biotics swirled together stronger and more uncontrolled than on Purgatory. They couldn't track who was feeling what for a moment until a soothing tenderness and warmth, that was identifiably emanating from Shepard, washed through the tumultuous jumble wrestling with their hearts and calmed their shared inner storm.

_I'd do anything for you Miri. _Shepard's voice whispered in Miranda's mind this time.

Miranda shook her head slightly, wiping the tears with her thumb tenderly, "You didn't have to do this, we could have found another way." her voice was just above a whisper her throat was so tight with the emotions still simmering through her. She could scarcely comprehend this completely foreign sensation of _feeling_ Shepard's emotions though they felt so right. She could feel what Shepard was saying and not saying, what she was _wanting_ to share and the truth of what she really felt through the underlying emotions that accompanied her words.

Miranda _knew_ Shepard was already struggling with her changed appearance and self identity with the removal of her scars. Right now that struggle beat within her own heart as she herself was struggling with who and what she was. Which made this an even _more_ powerful gesture from Shepard. The fact that Shepard had gone out and done this, had chosen to change one of her most beautiful and defining features for _her_, tore through the walls Miranda had so painstakingly built over the years.

A professional working relationship? Miranda almost mentally scoffed, not likely. While they _had_ been working together better this one act of self sacrifice threw all thoughts of maintaining that professional distance out the airlock.

Shepard closed the distance between them, not caring she was only in a towel, and gently slid her arms around Miranda, burying her face in the crook of the slightly taller woman's neck. She could feel the crumbling walls in Miranda but she didn't want to break them or Miranda while she was in such a fragile state. She hadn't realized just how much Miranda finding out her biotics had been copied had rocked the strong, intelligent and stoic woman to the core.

"This was the easiest. Besides they can fix it, it's only temporary." Shepard murmured.

Miranda closed her eyes and held Shepard tightly, "It's _not_ the easiest, the easiest would have been wearing a visor that can display tactical data and enhance your vision during hostile engagements. I was having one made for you..." she murmured into that damp hair that smelled sweetly of coconut and vanilla shampoo.

"But I wouldn't be able to truly look into your eyes." Shepard pulled back a little, still in Miranda's embrace, and smiled up into those glistening, tear filled cobalt blues.

"Now I can't look into yours." Miranda whispered sadly in response as she searched those glistening, red rimmed brown eyes that matched her chocolate hair nicely but were the eyes of a stranger.

"It would have killed you anyway." Shepard shook her head with a small shrug, though she was deeply touched by the sentiment from Miranda, "When the mental block's gone I'll fix my eyes. It's _not _permanent Miri." she was telling herself this as much as Miranda.

Miranda could hear it in her voice and feel it in her being and hesitated. Whatever this connection was between them it was still a jumble and hard to distinguish when they both experienced strong emotions.

Shepard kissed Miranda's cheek and whispered, "I'll be fine. I've got a plan." she gave Miranda a soft squeeze before pulling away from her.

Miranda felt a bit breathless when that connection with Shepard almost but not quite severed at the loss of touch and their calming emotions. She didn't move from the bathroom as Shepard left to get dressed, her mind was too busy processing all this.

Until now she had been struggling with the concept of having known Shepard in the past, that Shepard had been a friend, that all this concern and insistence from Shepard wasn't just about fixing a broken tool.

But no mere _friend_ would do what Shepard had just done for her. Not when she was still trying to adjust to this new life of hers. Having lost so much and being forced to work with an organization she openly loathed. Shepard cared for her, cared for her _deeply_. Shepard really would do whatever it took to support her through this.

Miranda stepped out of the bathroom and took a moment to watch as Shepard pulled on a white sports tank top. Being a marine she was trained to dress quickly and had already donned her underwear and a pair of gray track pants. Next came on a black zip up sweater and sneakers, it looked like Shepard was going for a simple workout and not to undergo intensive testing of her biotics.

Ready to go and not really surprised that Miranda was waiting for her Shepard strode up to her, watching the play of emotions in Miranda's eyes that she could feel a whisper of through her biotics. She stopped before the always immaculate woman. "Miri, I know the others are waiting right now but would you like to join me for drinks tonight? Talk about... this?" she reached over and lightly touched Miranda's hip, slipping her thumb up under Miranda's shirt and brushing the soft warmth of her bare skin.

The touch sent a light jolt through both of them.

"We'll be discussing it during testing, we need to know more..." Miranda responded, all business now as she reached to push Shepard's hand away but found instead that her hand lingered on Shepard's wrist.

Shepard pulled her hand back then with a nod but not before Miranda had felt the flash of disappointment.

Miranda quickly tightened her grip on Shepard's wrist, "But drinks would be appreciated. Might as well get started working off your tab."

Shepard raised a brow quizzically.

"You did mention you'd owe me a few drinks once this was over when we were on the Citadel." Miranda reminded her with a small smile.

"Oh so I've worked up a tab already have I?" Shepard beamed and the disappointment vanished, a glimmer of light returning to those altered eyes. "Well then I'd best make sure I keep on top of that and shout you a drink on a regular basis, considering how often I seem to put my foot in it around you and all."

"Indeed." Miranda nodded, her smile deepening at the thought.

Rana wanted to run both Shepard and Miranda through a gauntlet of biotic tests. She wanted to see if having Shepard in close proximity with Miranda altered anything from yesterdays tests.

Stripped down to skin tight gym shorts and tanks Shepard was strangely shy about seeing Miranda so underclothed! Those long slender legs, her gorgeous alabaster skin, her deliciously smooth abdomen, her toned physique that made the term perfect seem inadequate. Miranda's silken locks were tied up in a high pony tail that looked so damn sexy that Shepard felt decidedly homely next to the goddess of perfection.

Feeling her self-consciousness Miranda touched the small of Shepard's back and tried to reassure her wordlessly.

Shepard's breath hitched in her throat as there was no words, only a powerful sense of acceptance, of admiration even a small flicker of desire that Miranda didn't realize she was projecting. She straightened her shoulders and nodded appreciatively to Miranda.

Rana brought over a box of round silver pads about the diameter of her little finger that Shepard recognized as monitoring patches. Rana smirked mischievously, "I'll let you two sort yourselves out." she handed the box to Miranda.

Miranda took it and looked to Shepard, in business mode now despite their lack of attire, "I assume you know what these are?"

Shepard nodded and took one from the box in Miranda's hand, "They'll track the flow of dark energy through my nodes."

Miranda just nodded and began to apply them herself, watching out of the corner of her eye to make sure Shepard put them in the correct positions. Though she was getting a little more distracted with the graceful movements as Shepard leaned down to do her legs, those long, slender, battle toned legs a few shades darker than Miranda's, how those powerful muscles stretched and rippled with each move...

Shepard was oblivious to Miranda's close attention as she was remembering where all the dozens of dots needed to be placed on her body. That was until she picked up the shift in Miranda through her biotics. Curiously she looked over to see Miranda watching her intently, well watching her _hands_ at any rate. If she couldn't feel the specific warmth in the shift that had her own pulse rate picking up she'd have thought she was doing something wrong... she bit back her grin, "Am I doing it right? It's been awhile..." she asked innocently, fingering a dot on her elbow and studiously examining it.

Miranda smiled and moved to her side, "Here." she offered, fixing up a couple of the dots and placing the ones on her back that traversed down her spine, her fingers lingering a couple times. Standing behind Shepard she leaned in close and murmured into her ear, "Totally saw through that by the way."

"Do I at least rate a cute?" Shepard grinned, turning her head slightly towards Miranda and giving her more access to her neck.

"No." Miranda answered matter-of-factly, her lips tantalizingly close to Shepard's soft, warm skin, Shepard's scent of coconut and vanilla with a hint of something more... metallic filling her senses.

Shepard sighed, tingling from the close proximity of the near naked goddess behind her, the heat of Miranda's breath on her sensitive skin sending hot shivers through her body. She jumped slightly as Miranda's hand lightly grazed the small of her back and made actual contact with her skin. It sparked an increase in her ability to sense the desire and teasing swirling in Miranda and thus increasing her own.

"Cute is not the word I'd use." Miranda purred seductively in Shepard's ear leaving little room for interpretation as to what she was implying.

While not all the monitoring patches were in place Rana was still starting to get information coming through the system and what she was seeing was _very_ interesting... biotically speaking of course.

Shepard's mouth went dry and her knees almost buckled, unconsciously she swayed back into the warm, soft body of Miranda closing the little distance that had separated their bodies. She bit her lip to try and stop the gasp but it came anyway when Miranda steadied her by taking hold of her hips and _didn't_ pull away, the corner of Miranda's lips now against her neck so she could feel her smile. When had Miranda started feeling like _this!_

It was not a new phenomenon to Miranda to have someone dazed and lusting after her, nor for hapless fools to think they've fallen in love with her and try to 'win her heart'. It _was_ new that she had found someone she actually wanted to feel that way and could _feel_ what they felt. In this moment it wasn't lust, oh she was definitely arousing the great Commander Shepard, but there was more, so much _more_ to what Shepard was feeling. It was tentative but deep, as though it had been percolating in Stephanie since they were children, it wasn't sure yet if it wanted the love of friendship or something else.

The longer they stood like this the more aware they started to become of each other at an unprecedented level. Words weren't coming to either mind only emotions, feelings, warmth that flooded through them.

Rana was staring intently at the screen with wide eyes. They were _melding_. Sure it was very basic right now but they were showing the initial steps of asari children when they first began to explore sharing their minds with others. This was _incredible!_ Someone had discovered a way for humans to meld like asari. She wished they'd hurry up and get the rest of the patches on Miranda but she also didn't want to disturb this as the scanners continued to map out the unique biotics of these women.

Shepard finally found her knees again and pulled away from Miranda, feeling instantly cold as she did. Turning to face Miranda with a small smile she took those smouldering cobalt blues captive and gently took the small box from her. There was absolutely _nothing _cold or icy about those eyes right now. Not breaking eye contact she strode around Miranda, Miranda half turning to keep eye contact until she put a hand to the woman's shoulder to stop her.

While Miranda couldn't read those deep brown orbs like she had the delightful amber ones the desire they contained was plain as day and she felt a pang as they were lost to her line of sight.

Shepard pressed the first dot under the pony tail at the base of Miranda's skull, the warmth and silkiness of her skin a strange sensation to her battle hardened finger tips. Miranda's intake of breath was not lost on her but one thought came crashing through all these wonderful sensations.

How will Miranda react when she finds out about her being Persephone?

Shepard's hand hesitated in the box as she was reaching for a patch. She frowned slightly and reluctantly quashed these dangerous feelings. They were here to study biotics and so Rana and Miranda could show her more clearly how they were going to restore Miranda's memory pathways. Quickly but gently she applied the rest of the pads along Miranda's spine, no longer lingering and eyes firmly concentrating on the patches and not that magnificent body she was attaching them to.

Miranda frowned slightly at the sudden change in the woman behind her. What just happened? Looking back with her brow raised curiously as Shepard moved away she saw no answers in that averted gaze and felt uncertainty as the dominant emotion in Shepard. She said nothing as Shepard returned the box to Rana who's expression was schooled into a medical mode.

"I'm going to put you through a battery of tests individually. Then we'll test you together and see if either of your biotics are altered by each other's presence." Rana had a strong feeling they would be.

Shepard flashed Miranda a quick grin and mock salute before the operative left for an adjoining room that was biotically shielded.

Miranda returned with a small smile of her own and a brusque nod as the door closed to separate them.

"Alright Rana, hit me with it." Shepard warmed up her biotics in readiness, wary of that smirk that crossed Rana's elegant asari features.

"Well, you asked for it." Rana's smirk deepened and she activated the program on its highest setting, one that would challenge a matriarch.

Shepard was on her arse in seconds with an undignified grunt.

* * *

><p><em><strong>I realize there's still more questions to be answered but here seemed to be a good place to split and I know there are some anxiously waiting fans chewing fingernails in their anticipation of more! You guys rock!<strong>_

_**Thanks for all the reviews. I do plan to bring in some more characters the game wouldn't. Conrad Verner is NOT one of them.**_

_**Enjoy!  
><strong>_


	30. Biotic Revelations

After the initial beat down of the biotics test Shepard had scowled and fought back hard. She concentrated less on the fact that this was a test and more on making sure she didn't get her arse kicked by the numerous sensor drones that were flying at her. A synthesized voice commanded her what attack form to use and a flash of green with a soft harmonic tone on a sensor indicated which one she was supposed to hit while avoiding the others. A couple times she had to put up her barriers to shield herself from a hit. At the advancement of each stage she took a few knocks, missed a few of the calls but overall she managed to tag eighty percent of the targets in time and with the right biotic attack.

Then Rana had her trying out some of the Prothean techniques.

Shepard was very wary about this. Information could be stolen easily enough and it was one thing to _know_ what she was capable of with normal biotics and another to know just how far outside the standard range she could go.

Rana measured and recorded Shepard's Biotic Vision, detailing what she described herself as seeing. Her breath became a little ragged as Shepard demonstrated how she could rip something apart at the molecular level, the _power_ Shepard exuded was staggering.

Searching her memories Shepard forgot about Rana, forgot about the test, and truly began to explore her Prothean abilities like she'd never had the chance to before.

She created a biotic shell that formed an impenetrable shield not even an M920 Cain could break... for a few seconds at least.

Then a small cloud of swirling micro-singularities that tore through a sensor leaving it a twisted, smoking hunk of metal.

Rana watched in awe as a ring of tumultuous dark energy began spin around Shepard's feet. Then suddenly Shepard was disappearing into it! "Shepard!" she cried out, rushing over helplessly as the dark energy disappeared once Shepard had fallen into it.

In the next room Miranda and Shepard were a tangle of limbs on the floor, Miranda flat on her back with Shepard laying on top of her all akimbo and breathing heavily.

"What the bloody hell was that!" Miranda exclaimed as she tried to disengage herself from the dazed and disoriented Shepard, glancing up warily in the direction Shepard had just fallen from.

Shepard didn't speak for a moment as her mind tried to translate what Miranda had said.

When the look of dazed confusion didn't lift Miranda knelt beside Shepard and helped her to sit up, "Shepard, what did you just do?" she asked.

Before Shepard could respond Rana burst into the room in a panic about to express that Shepard had just vanished but was relieved to see both women in one piece.

Miranda glanced up to catch the look of relief crossing the asari's face but her attention was brought back to Shepard at the increasing anxiety that was beginning to flow through her. "What is it? What's wrong?" she asked in concern, looking over Shepard and seeing no physical injury.

Shepard relaxed as the words started making sense, "Too Prothean." she answered slowly, testing out each word as though it was hard for her to formulate them.

Miranda's eyes narrowed slightly. What did that mean? "Is there a limit on how much of the Prothean techniques you can use?" she asked quickly.

Shepard's brow furrowed as she translated as much as she could before giving up with an annoyed grunt, "Speak slowly please." she asked softly, a little embarrassed.

Rana went back to the console screens to see if there was anything in the scans that could explain this sudden change leaving the two women alone in the small room.

Miranda, kneeling beside the strangely behaving Commander, could hide her visible concern but knew with the growing connection they shared that Shepard would be able to feel how concerned she truly was. "Can you describe what you are feeling?" she asked, pausing slowly and deliberately after every word.

"Prothean brain." Shepard gestured to her head in frustration, "To _ag_-" she stopped as she'd about to say a Prothean word and sought for the English word, "deep in the Cipher for too long. Everything is in Prothean, having trouble translating." she responded slowly, sounding out her words carefully.

"Has this happened before?" Miranda was cursing herself as _again_ her files lacked critical information concerning Shepard.

"Not to this...bad." Shepard was scowling at herself as she couldn't find the word in English she'd been wanting to use, it was on the tip of her tongue and bugging the hell out of her.

Miranda reached up and gently cupped Shepard's face. If this had happened before Shepard would know a way to fix it so she gently soothed the distressed woman, "How did you manage it last time?" She watched as Shepard mulled over her words until she understood them but was not reassured by the darkening scowl or the strange sensations running through Shepard. Was she feeling anger _and_ embarrassment?

"Liara melded, helped me find my humanity." The words were coming back to her a little faster now.

Miranda was surprised at the twist in her gut at hearing that, but personal feelings aside if Shepard needed it... "I'll contact her." she moved to stand but was stopped by Shepard's hand and the shake of her head.

"I... want to listen to _you_, hearing you talk is helping, forcing my brain to find the language." Shepard was asking her to stay a little sheepishly, blushing a little as she averted her gaze from Miranda's sensational figure that was so close...

Miranda smiled and that twisting in her gut subsided. "Well then, I know I was just about finished and we both require a meal before the next stage of testing." she held her hand out to Shepard.

Shepard smiled and took it, smoothly regaining her feet as she stood beside Miranda, "Mmmm food, fastest way to a marine's heart." she grinned, patting her bare stomach. Then she'd realized exactly what she'd said and who she'd said it to and went bright red, "Uh, that is..." she fumbled as the words were lost to her, being flustered the Prothean language came to mind first.

Miranda restrained the chuckle at Shepard's slight panic and calmed her with a soft squeeze of her hand, "I'll keep that in mind."

As Miranda walked to the door Shepard couldn't help the downward glance of her eyes... then she realized she was staring like a teenage boy... or Massani, and shook her head. Chuckling to herself she followed after Miranda quickly.

Sitting in the cafeteria brought quite a bit of unwanted attention in the form of slack jawed stares from other researchers who'd come in for a quick coffee fix or nutrient boost before getting back to work. They were only part-way through their tests so the patches had remained on but both Miranda and Shepard _had_ put on their outer clothes so it wasn't like they were wandering around in skin tight shorts and deliberately tormenting the scientists.

Miranda coolly ignored them and noted that Shepard was once again either oblivious or just didn't care.

"So what was the whole falling out of the sky thing?" Miranda asked her with a curious smile.

"Portal from what I can understand. I have never tried it before." She blushed, her words were slow and deliberate, "I was trying to create it in front of me but for some reason it was beneath me."

It actually took a moment for the operative to digest that, "You can actually create a portal between two points in space?"

Shepard tried to think of the explanation for it. Taking her napkin she unfolded it and placed it on the table between them, flattening it out. "Space/time." she indicated the napkin.

Miranda nodded, very interested in what she was saying.

"Portal does not carve through space/time like a wormhole. It _bends_ space/time," she picked up the two diagonal corners of the napkin and brought them together, "bringing two points into one or at least _close_ to one, not sure, have not explored the theory only application." Shepard shrugged and sat back. She had been exploring her abilities and what she could _do _not how the science behind them worked, she wasn't a scientist after all and it was all in Prothean.

Miranda blinked as she tried to find an explanation for that but space/time theory was not her speciality. "That's incredibly dangerous and would have to require a _lot_ of energy." she mused.

Shepard again shrugged, catching the skeptical tone but not all of the words. Returning her hands to the napkin she scrunched the points together and shook her head, "Not like this, not pushing against, not breaking through." she smoothed it out again and lifted the corners together again, "Bending, no friction." she reiterated.

Miranda would wait until Shepard was able to think more clearly before she asked more questions on it for she could see the potential for such an ability to be put to excellent use in many ways. So she simply nodded and asked the next question that was on her mind. "Can I ask why you didn't want Liara's help with this?" Miranda asked, ensuring she kept her verbal pace slow for Shepard to follow with ease.

Shepard scowled down at her plate, not really seeing what was on it just not wanting to inflict her glare on Miranda. "Went to see her yesterday."

Miranda frowned, why didn't she know that? How could something like _that _escape her attention? Yes she'd been distracted but Shepard had gone to see one of her closest friends and hadn't said a word about it. "I take it, it didn't go so well." she shared her realization softly.

Shepard shook her head, "She has... changed." sadness crept into her. "I tried so hard during the melds to..." her sentence trailed off into a string of Prothean and she didn't realize until Miranda reached across the table and put her hand over Shepard's. Shepard stopped with a start and looked up in surprise.

"Stephanie, I can't speak Prothean. Slow down and concentrate on your words." Miranda instructed her softly. Normally she wouldn't have the patience to coach someone like this, but this was Shepard. She'd spent more than two years putting the woman back together and was still learning new and very surprising things about her. More than that though she was actually starting to _care._

Shepard flushed and looked away in embarrassment but her hand was frozen under Miri's touch, "Sorry." she murmured.

Miranda smiled and gave her hand a light squeeze before sitting back, "Start again."

Shepard took a deep breath and proceeded with great concentration but this was easier than trying to explain some complicated Prothean scientific theory. "You saw what I was capable of on Omega, in the quarantine zone. There is a darkness in me, I keep it under control until something like that happens... when I see innocent little kids torn apart like that it surfaces and all I want, all I _need_ is to tear apart those bastards with my bare hands." she swallowed, face bowed and eyes shut tight. "If my hand hadn't been broken it wouldn't have been my biotics I used to crush them." she whispered.

Miranda was already well aware of that, that Shepard could lose herself to anger and yet still function in a command capacity was remarkable.

"It's why I needed your help at the clinic, to restrain myself, to be... human again." She huffed, brows deeply furrowed, "I've fought it for so long there are days I question if I even _am_ human anymore, I mean I needed an _asari_ to drag my mind back into thinking like a human. How screwed up is that?" she growled more to herself than to the woman listening closely to her every word.

Miranda had stilled. That struggle of being human or not was something she could identify with so well. She touted being the genetically perfect human woman, used it as a shield to hide so much. But in truth she was bits and pieces of so many people there were days she didn't entirely feel human either. Those days she just buried herself in her work to make herself forget, to embrace the knowledge that she was a tool, the best bloody tool ever created.

Shepard took a deep breath as she _felt_ an understanding in Miranda she'd never felt around anyone else, as though Miranda _knew_ exactly what she was talking about. It gave her the encouragement she needed to continue, "When Liara melded with me, in deciphering the beacons and Cipher and helping me... find me again, I always tried to keep that darkness away from her." She slumped back in her chair, forgetting all about her food that wasn't all that flash anyway. "She was so beautiful and innocent and pure and now..." her expression darkened again, "Now she's threatening clients who don't want to pay with the same threat _Benezia_ used on us on Noveria. As hard as I tried, I _still_ tainted her."

"Bullshit." Miranda interjected immediately, cutting into that self-loathing anger that was forming in Shepard. At least Shepard was speaking faster now, as though it wasn't as hard for her to translate the words she wanted, which was a good sign.

Shepard jerked up at hearing Miranda swear like that, it sounded so _dirty_ coming from the refined and immaculate woman sitting before her.

Still keeping her voice measured Miranda elaborated, "Liara is responsible for her own choices and has experienced things you cannot know or understand since you died. She's an _information broker_, that means she does some hard and dangerous things to get information and deals with dangerous people. Her life has depended on her toughening up in the career she's chosen. If," she leaned forward slightly for emphasis, "that's _if_ you've influenced her in that way, it's saved her life. Even when you couldn't be there in person there was a part of you _still protecting her_ a part that now always will."

Shepard listened to the admonishment and not only did she find it was getting easier to understand Miranda but she could kind of see where Miranda was coming from. It still felt as though she'd tainted Liara, Liara was an archaeologist, a _doctor, _she shouldn't _be_ an information broker.

"Stephanie," Miranda tried again as though the anger faded the regret still clung to Shepard.

"Steph." Shepard murmured automatically at registering the name Miranda had just called her.

Miranda hesitated, it sounded so personal to call her that.

"Only my mother called me Stephanie and that's when I was in trouble." Shepard smirked, "Stephanie Evelyn Shepard, you put Mr. Jeffery's down right now!" she imitated her mother's scolding voice.

Miranda's brow rose and her lips quirked in a small smile.

Shepard's smirk widened into an actual grin, "He'd confiscated my piano attachment and I wasn't having a bar of it. So I lifted him biotically, flipped him upside down and shook him around a bit until my piano fell out of his pocket. Of course this was after school and in front of pretty much everyone. I got in big trouble, but he never confiscated anything from me again."

Miranda shook her head with a smile, "I can imagine you'd have been a teacher's worst nightmare."

Shepard laughed, "Yeah, asked so many questions one actually threatened to kick me out of class if I didn't sit on my hands and shut my mouth. Not _my_ fault he couldn't back up his theories."

From that point Shepard began to perk up a little and found herself relaxing with Miranda. As she did and thought about different little stories from her past she found the Prothean language becoming less and less prevalent until she wasn't consciously having to translate what she was hearing or saying.

Returning to the testing for the combined session the pair were much more comfortable with each other and more in tune to each other.

It was a thing of beauty to watch them tear through exercises as one. The way they moved was as though they were in a dance, always aware of where the other was, of what they were doing or about to do. Their biotics hummed together, whispering even louder when they passed close by and visibly brightening whenever they did touch.

The tests that involved them being in physical contact as they carried out different attacks were remarkable.

Shepard was finding it increasingly harder not to turn around and shove Miranda against a wall in a crushing kiss. The air around them was heavy with the smell of ozone and it was making her a little heady. Then there was the fact that Miranda's slender hands were on Shepard's bare waist pouring her biotic energy into Shepard...

Rana had left some time ago as the biotic power of the women working in sync was just too damn dangerous to stay in the same room.

Shepard threw the last sensor drone _through_ the wall, ending the test and left gasping for breath.

Miranda should have let go then, the test was over, the sheer _power_ in Shepard through her touch was breathtaking. _Shepard_ was breathtaking. The slight sheen of perspiration that made her skin glisten in the light, the feel of those muscles rippling beneath her hands, the scent that was only Shepard, the way the small tendrils of hair that had come free from her pony tail curled with the dampness of her sweat.

Shepard had been fighting to beat down that growing desire burning in her, to block that intense heat coming from Miranda. But when Miranda's arms slid around her, encircling her waist and pulling her close she almost lost the will to fight. Then Miranda's full, soft lips were on her neck, tasting her with light flicks of her tongue, and any desire to fight up and left the room.

The moment was broken when a lab tech from the lab next door barged in with an angry, "What is going on in here?"

Shepard groaned in dismay as Miranda straightened and pulled her arms back but surprisingly, and thankfully, her hands remained on Shepard's hips keeping her upright.

"That is _none_ of your concern. Get out, _now_." Miranda commanded him with seething anger and superiority.

The man paled under the frightening glares of both women and scurried away in fear for his life.

Rana came in next seeing as the test was concluded and they shouldn't be throwing around warps, singularities, shockwaves and what not.

Shepard reluctantly found her knees and straightened, pulling away from Miranda's warm, soft body and feeling rather cold as a result.

"Okay patches off and go get cleaned up. I'll go over the results and we can have something to discuss when you return." Rana instructed them calmly, casting only a quick glance at the rather intimate position they were in and going straight to the console.

Miranda began to pull off the patches on Shepard's back as Shepard went to work on the ones on her head. Miranda had to bite her lip and concentrate on the patches at the way Shepard's muscles flexed when she raised her arms, she didn't feel like giving Rana even more of a show than they'd given her earlier.

Shepard was combating the heat from the goddess behind her by playing Nielson's Fifth in her mind. She was concentrating so hard on it she actually started humming, though one can hardly capture a piece like that with a simple little hum.

Miranda smiled and shook her head at the woman, working on removing her own patches now while trying to identify what Shepard was humming.

Patches all removed Shepard turned to help Miranda with the ones on her back and it was only then she realized she was actually humming. Clearing her throat she blushed and stepped around the smirking figure of Miranda.

Starting from the lowest patch and making her way up Shepard removed the patch under that pony tail of dark, thick, silken locks last. As she did she leaned in brushing aside the long hair and ever so lightly grazing her lips against the soft skin from beneath the patch just below her bio-amp implant.

Miranda gasped at the ghost of a kiss, Shepard did not touch her anywhere else, no hands on her back or hips, just the kiss, then she was gone and for a heartbeat Miranda wasn't sure it had even happened. Until she caught sight of the shy smile from Shepard as she took her handful of patches over to their box. That shy little smile warmed Miranda's heart as it hadn't been warmed in so long.

Showered and eager to find out the results of the tests Shepard rocked a little on the balls of her feet, watching Miranda's face as she read over the data herself.

"I'll start off with some of the data regarding Shepard." Rana nodded to the brunette, "From what I can tell your biotics are evolving, becoming more Prothean not just in technique but in _how_ your body uses dark energy." she brought up a file from an unknown source that showed a human biotic creating a warp. "This is what is considered 'normal' for human biotics." she brought up another file that was Shepard's, "This is you." she played them side by side.

Shepard and Miranda _both_ looked stunned.

The 'normal' biotics nodes and energy flow were bright, thick bands of blue light that traversed their body, brightest along their right arm, shoulder and neck region. However, Shepard's was barely visible, a small spark of almost purple light shooting along her arm that didn't travel nearly the distance the 'normal' biotics had. Yet Shepard's attack had been four times as powerful.

"You're becoming more efficient meaning that your biotic stamina and power levels have increased dramatically. I'm sure you've noticed that you can do more without feeling nearly as fatigued or hungry." Rana nodded, it would take more than an hour or so to truly understand this data.

"Yeah, had noticed that, but my appetite hasn't changed, I'm still as hungry as I was before meaning I eat about twice as much as the average human woman." Shepard admitted with a sigh.

Miranda smirked as she recalled seeing Shepard wolf down three bowls of Gardiner's calamari gumbo gleefully, much to the chef's delight.

Rana just nodded and continued, "There was some very interesting things happening in your brain when you began experimenting with Prothean techniques." she played a segment.

It meant very little to Shepard but Miranda watched on with great interest.

"I had thought that the Prothean techniques would align with the neural anomaly, that the anomaly was in fact the Cipher itself. But the anomaly is here." she highlighted a part of the brain that was showing only normal activity whereas other parts of Shepard's brain were alight with the flashes of synapses firing rapidly.

Shepard was deeply confused and scratched her head absently as she tried to figure it out but was drawing nothing but blanks.

"The anomaly only became active when you two began melding." Rana stated simply.

Miranda looked over at her sharply and Shepard spluttered a shocked, "What!"

"It's only basic at the moment, like a child reaching out to another for the first time. But with time and practice I firmly believe, given this data, that you two will be able to fully meld and join your minds should you so choose." Rana smiled between them with bright eyes as it could in fact be the greatest discovery in the development of human biotics, though someone _else_ had figured it out and was keeping very tight lipped about it.

Shepard had gone sheet white in horror at the thought of melding with Miranda.

Miranda's heart raced in great concern at what she was feeling from Shepard. Moving from behind the console she halted as Shepard raised her hand between them and shook her head.

"Don't." Shepard whispered, her breathing ragged. It was as though her entire world had just crumbled around her. She had already tainted one person she loved, it would _break her_ if she tainted Miranda.

Miranda frowned, as if the words would make a difference she declared firmly and with more than a little touch of anger, "I am _not_ Liara don't you even _think_ of comparing us, I am_ not_ some fragile little school girl. I've done things _worse_ than you, Shepard, so you get it out of your head _right now_ that you'll _taint_ me."

Shepard recoiled, surprised that Miranda had seen what she was feeling so quickly as she was only just realizing it herself. Taking a deep breath she nodded slowly. Miranda was right in that she was completely different to Liara, she had done dark things in the name of Cerberus and advancing humanity. But did that mean what good there was still in Miranda would be threatened? "I'll... need some time to process that." she admitted softly.

Miranda felt her gut twisting again with bitter disappointment. She was only just beginning to think that they could be more than just friends yet the thought of Shepard rejecting her, not giving them a chance even, struck her harder than she could have imagined. Schooling her face into the well practiced blank mask she determined within herself to _show_ Shepard they could work. She was Miranda Lawson, the bloody perfect woman, she did _not_ get rejected.

Rana watched the exchange but said nothing even though her heart sank a little at the look on Shepard's face, that hardening of her eyes. When it was clear neither woman was going to say more she continued. "That anomaly was also active when the two of you were using your biotics in sync. So while it may not be Prothean in nature it most assuredly is involved, if not the reason, you are able to... link biotically. Yes your biotics are identical but that is not the reason _why_ you can link, being identical means that you are in sync when you _do_ link." she opted to refrain from using the term 'meld' given Shepard's response to it just then.

Shepard was still reeling from the previous revelation but got the general gist of what Rana was saying and nodded a little numbly.

"I need more time to look at the data but I think your neural link could actually be used to help with Miranda's treatments." Rana offered a little tentatively.

Shepard turned from them abruptly and stalked up to the wall. Bracing herself against it with her hands and forehead she took a deep breath to calm herself.

Miranda winced as a moment later Shepard punched the wall so hard she put her fist through it.

"Fuck!" Shepard hissed and not at what she'd done to the wall.

Rana glanced at Miranda who was watching Shepard closely, her expression a cold mask but there was a slight twitch to her left eye.

No one spoke for a few very tense minutes and Miranda made no move to approach or console Shepard.

Shepard seemed to finally pull herself together and straightened. Her face a mask of determination she turned back and walked up to Miranda.

Miranda said nothing but searched those dark brown eyes, there was still turmoil in Shepard but overriding that was her fierce protective streak.

"I promised you I'd do whatever it took to help you. I meant it." she spoke firmly in Commander tone rather than a personal one.

Miranda nodded a little stiffly, she didn't want _Commander Shepard's_ help for this, she wanted _Steph's_, but she would have to make do with whichever side of Shepard came to her aide.

Shepard looked to Rana, "What would we have to do?" she asked brusquely.

"To start off with simply learning to meld. What happened today was more instinctual, your body's responding to each other's biotic stimulation." Rana kept her tone deliberately clinical.

Shepard still blushed though.

Miranda didn't react.

"Truthfully I'm not certain having an asari teach you would be beneficial for this. The way we meld is different to what you were exhibiting." Rana glanced between them.

"So in other words it would be best for us to test and develop this ourselves." Miranda stated more for Shepard's benefit than her own.

Shepard swallowed back the touch of panic, "But what if by melding Miranda actually finds out who I really am?"

"You were able to keep things from Liara, at this early stage keeping that information from me should be simple for you." Miranda responded quickly, a little too quickly.

Shepard straightened her shoulders and frowned, "You know it's not because I don't _want_ you to know. Goddess Miri, I've wanted you to know since I first realized you _didn't_. I just..." her shoulders dropped minutely, "I can't flip a switch in the way I think, ever since I first melded with Liara I've been terrified of tainting someone, especially someone I love."

Miranda's eyes widened a little and the cool mask cracked slightly.

"I just need a little time to process this, please... please just give me some time." the hint of desperation in Shepard's voice was only minor compared to the inner war she was experiencing, she didn't even realize she'd used the word 'love'.

Miranda could feel the war in her and she softened though the use of 'love' did have her spinning a little, "I understand Steph." she nodded.

There was little else Rana could say with certainty with the day's revelations and needing time to study them so they began the journey back to the ship.

Waiting for a taxi Shepard reached out and gently took Miranda's hand in her own, looking down at it so as not to meet those captivating blue eyes, "I'd still like to have drinks with you tonight, if you're still interested..." her voice was soft and hesitant, almost lost to the busy sounds of Illium.

Miranda gave Shepard's hand a squeeze, "What time?"

"When you've finished your reports, I'd rather not have you thinking about work you need to finish." Shepard glanced up with a small smile.

Miranda returned the smile with a dazzling one of her own, "I'm looking forward to it." she reached up with her other hand and gently tucked a few stray hairs behind Shepard's ear, lightly running her fingertips along Shepard's jaw.

Shepard's smile widened and she didn't release Miranda's hand until the taxi arrived.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Thanks to all my faithful reviewers and the occassional ones! Really appreciating the feedback, some of which is truly making me think a little harder about different things I want to see in the game and how to make them happen in a legit enough way.<strong>_

_**HB I have indeed read Sisirongana's stuff and loved it. I LOVE a good femShep/Miri fic :D **_

_**And for all you readers lost in the world of The Old Republic... SO JEALOUS! Never played an MMO but when I get the money I'm so totally in on this one!**_

_**Always love the reviews and you never know, you might be able to sell me on a really good idea or two! :D Oh and I'm not set on if I've shown you all of Seph's biotic potential yet, she did have quite the interruption after all...**_

_**Until next time! :)**_

_**[After-post thoughts: Had a friendly suggestion that Seph's getting all too powerful biotically so thought I'd let you in on a couple things I've got planned. Yes she's a biotic badass. However, even though she's got the memories of the Prothean abilities and was able to pull them off in a controlled environment things will be a little different when there's bullets flying around. There's also the factor that if she uses too much Prothean stuff it affects her mind which limits how much of it she can actually use in the field at one time. With the portal, let's just say that's not the last time it'll be raining Seph on Miri ;) Hope that helps!]  
><strong>_


	31. Date Night

Shepard was actually nervous as she stood outside the personal quarters of one particular woman. She had come to the realization that she really needed some assistance in a particular department before going out for drinks with a goddess. She _knew_ standing outside these particular quarters was in actual fact probably a very bad idea, but she really didn't have any other option. She could already feel herself regretting it to the very core of her being but her hand still reached for the door chime.

The door swished open to a light and airy, "Hey Shep!"

Shepard stepped into the private domain of the master thief with as much courage as she could muster.

"What's up?" Kasumi cocked her head slightly, very curious about the steely expression on Shepard's face.

Shepard cleared her throat but knew if she didn't get right to the point she'd chicken out and Commander Shepard was _no coward!_ "I need your assistance with something."

"Shoot." Kasumi grinned, tickled pink that Shepard was coming to _her_ for whatever this something was.

"I..." Shepard gulped and her cheeks flushed, "I'm taking Miri out for drinks tonight but don't have anything to wear." The way Kasumi's entire _being _just lit up rang warning bells and at that wicked little grin all Shepard could think was 'Oh _shit._'

"Taking _Miri_ out huh?" Kasumi's voice was filled with delighted mirth and was on her feet in a flash, "Are we talking friend's-drinks or date-drinks?" she asked cheekily.

Shepard answered without hesitation and a pointed look at Kasumi, "Friends."

Kasumi crossed her arms and tapped her toe pointedly, waiting for the _right_ response.

Shepard didn't budge.

"You know if it was just for _friends_ you wouldn't have come to see me right." Kasumi pointed out.

Shepard's eyes widened and her face looked like a kid's who'd been caught in the cookie jar. "Uh..." she blushed and the surprise turned into a scowl that she'd been so easily caught out.

Kasumi couldn't help it, she burst out laughing, "Oh Shep, you really do have it bad." She lightly hit the woman's arm.

Shepard's blush deepened and she attempted to defend herself, "I want to look decent for a friend so I don't embarrass her going somewhere nice in my shipboards or armour."

"I thought your armour _was_ nice_._" Kasumi teased her with her very own words.

Shepard glared at her, "Seriously? You want to help me or not? Because I'm all for leaving if you keep this up."

Kasumi held up her hands submissively with a big grin, "So you realize you can't wear your armour while clothes shopping right?"

Shepard sighed and rolled her eyes, "Yes I have resigned myself to this fact." she sighed, "Hence this." She gestured to herself, she was wearing black slacks and white shirt of what would have been a Cerberus uniform but all the logo's had been carefully removed by one Kelly Chambers.

"Alright then, let's go!" Kasumi grabbed her by the hand and practically dragged Shepard to the elevator before she could change her mind about the whole thing.

It had been two hours. Two hours that felt so much _longer_ to Shepard. Kasumi was finding this far too exciting and she was feeling more and more like a barbie doll for the overly chipper little thief... minus the over sized bust and blonde hair of course. She had tried on dresses and shoes and pants and shirts and had so drawn the line at underwear stating in no uncertain terms that Miranda was _not_ going to be seeing that far. She didn't mention that the woman had already seen her naked far too many times as she'd never hear the end of it.

Yet Shepard persisted because she truly _did_ want to look good for Miranda and Kasumi really wasn't that bad with her perky nature and cheeky grin that was a little endearing.

"Come on Shep let's see it!" Kasumi called out eagerly in anticipation. She'd convinced Shep to try on a stunning dress... convinced, blackmailed minor difference of opinion. But Shep had gallantly taken the dress and disappeared in the changing cubicle some time ago.

There was no response, not even a growling snap for her to 'shut up' or 'go away' or a complaint of 'what were you thinking?'.

Curiously Kasumi approached the door, unlocking it was a snap for the thief who opened it enough to determine that Shep was indeed wearing the dress so she stepped in.

Shepard was just staring at her reflection with a look of shock on her face.

The floor length dress was gorgeous. Silky, soft champagne in colour and hugged Shepard's figure exquisitely. The smooth expanse of her back was left exposed until just above the small of her back where the dress elegantly curved to meet the string of sparkling white gems like diamonds that danced along her spine from the slender halter neck. It clung to her hips before falling away to the floor, a slit in the right side of the dress reached up to her thigh that would give a tantalizing taste of her long legs beneath it when she moved.

Kasumi's eyes flicked to the mirror where she could see the plunging neckline that almost reached Shepard's navel and was elegantly held together by a half dozen small delicate strings of glistening white gems just below her breasts to hold the dress together. The first couple of strings were shorter and straight while the rest gradually became longer and drooped a little more each time until all together they were about the width of Shepard's hand. The dress revealed a lot of Shepard's slightly darker toned skin in a very tasteful and elegant manner that Kasumi just knew would make Miranda swoon.

"Oh we are so buying that one! Don't care if you don't wear it tonight but wow, I mean _wow_." Kasumi gushed softly, eyes a little wide at the sight before her. She grinned, if Shep didn't buy that dress right now she'd just have to come back and 'borrow' it for a good cause.

Shepard couldn't deny that she looked sensational in it but she could barely recognize herself! Who was that gorgeous woman in the reflection? Kasumi's voice broke through her dazed thoughts and she blushed furiously when she saw her in the mirror.

"You look _amazing._" Kasumi gushed with absolute sincerity, beaming up at Shep with a sunny smile and no hint of all the earlier teasing she'd inflicted on the soldier.

"I-I can't wear this!" Shepard shook her head, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Sure you can. Miranda won't be able to take her eyes off you." Kasumi's eyes twinkled under her hood.

Shepard slowly started to smile at that thought.

"Save it for a special night but Shep in all seriousness, you've got to get that dress." Kasumi advised her very strongly and patted her arm lightly before ducking back out of the cubicle.

Shepard was left a little dazed after that one, eventually they found something they both approved of for tonight. Before Shepard could make her escape back to the ship, however, Kasumi had grabbed her hand and dragged her into a salon. There were enough humans on Illium to warrant such an establishment though it was a little surprising to find a couple of asari stylists.

Shepard had to concede that she did need a cut of some kind. She kept her hair tied back in a pony tail during missions and everywhere but her quarters, but right now her hair was the result of regrowth due to the Lazarus project and not entirely... satisfactory if the face on the hair dresser was anything to go by.

Miranda couldn't believe how late it was. She knew Shepard had been waiting for her, and Kasumi had been sending her reminder messages much to her frustration, but Shepard had said for her to finish her reports and given how distracted she'd been of late there had been quite a substantial amount to get through. Closing down her console she quickly proceeded to leave her quarters and head up to the Loft to meet with Shepard finally.

"You're not going in _that_ are you?" Kasumi's voice suddenly stopped Miranda in her tracks at the elevator.

Miranda turned to the younger woman with a frown and slightly raised brow, "We're just having a couple drinks in the Loft, Kasumi." She was slightly annoyed at Kasumi. Given all the messages the meddlesome woman had sent all afternoon Shepard had clearly told her about it. Although it wasn't exactly a secret she didn't want the crew gossiping about anything that might develop between them.

Kasumi's grin became conspiratorial, "Oh _really?_ I happen know that _someone_ spent hours shopping for something to wear so she didn't embarrass a certain someone else by going _out _in her shipboards or armour." she winked then slipped back into her own quarters.

"Wait, what?" Miranda frowned at the retreating hooded figure who just ignored her. Neither she nor Shepard had spoken of going _out_ for drinks only that they'd share them tonight. The knowledge that Shepard had actually taken the time to consider her appearance and wanted to take her out was both surprising and very pleasing. Miranda smiled and returned to her quarters quickly to change into something more fitting. She hadn't opted to change before as _she_ hadn't wanted to make Shepard feel uncomfortable, she was very aware of how self conscious Shepard had been with her initially during the tests. Kasumi had recommended she wear something 'nice', she had a few options to choose from as she was always prepared for anything.

Shepard was surprisingly relaxed. The music she played soothing her soul and causing the Prothean intrusion into her conscious thoughts further back into the Cipher making her feel much more human again. She didn't hear the doors swish open or the click of heels that came to a rather abrupt halt by the fish tank.

Miranda couldn't help but watch for a moment. Shepard generally looked like a different woman when she played her piano, so free, so graceful, without a care in the world. Right now though it was something else to watch her.

Shepard was wearing dark hipster jeans with a black belt fastened by a circular silver buckle, and fashionable calf high black boots. Her top was sleeveless, white for the most part but curving around her bust extending up to and including the stylish collar was black with a black stripe the width of two fingers cutting around behind her back to meet up again on the other side. From just under the bust the top was open fully exposing the battle toned abdomen that given her current attire looked very feminine and downright sexy.

Blue eyes travelling from the boots and up that gorgeous figure came to Shepard's peaceful face and noticed the layered bangs that framed the right side of her face, the rest of Shepard's brown hair pulled away from her face in a simple but elegant twist. Having grown used to seeing her in armour or jogging clothes... or naked, it was so different seeing Shepard dressed up like this, it wasn't over the top or flashy, it was simple but nice, very nice.

Shepard finished the piece and opened her eyes to see Miranda openly admiring her. Grinning she flicked off the piano, "Ah so reports are conquered I take it?"

"You had any doubt?" Miranda returned with an amused half-smile, her eyes twinkling.

Shepard gracefully rose to her feet, "I'd _hoped_ I'd given you incentive." Striding around the coffee table she approached Miranda, appraising her quickly with instant approval but not sure what to say. Miranda had never really liked being complimented on her appearance... or her intelligence, or her biotics or _anything_ really.

Miranda wore a sexy little black dress that came to just above her knees with wide glittering black belt hugging her hips, capped sleeves, a tantalizing V neckline that showed just enough to set hearts racing... much like her usual uniform, and nice strappy heels that showed off her perfect ankles and those incredible legs.

Catching that hesitation Miranda smiled and inclined her head, "You look great Steph." she assured the self conscious woman.

Shepard grinned, her cheeks flushing a little, "So can I actually say you look amazing?" Shepard's heart beat a little faster as she moved a little closer, smoothly gliding into Miranda's personal space without crowding her, her husky voice was soft now, "Or do I tell you how I find the dress_ distracting_?" she asked with an endearing touch of hopefulness in her voice.

Miranda didn't move, didn't have to, she could feel that Shepard wouldn't proceed any closer without her approval. Shepard was excited and hopeful and nervous with a hint of desire flickering away in the background not yet overpowering or insisting on more than perhaps a light kiss on the cheek. So that's what she gave her, reaching up she gently touched Shepard's chin and closed the distance between them to brush her lips across Shepard's cheek. "Thank you Steph. I'd be interested in hearing how you find my dress distracting." she pulled back with a wink and turned to leave.

Shepard grinned triumphantly and followed with a spring in her step, she had a really good feeling about tonight and didn't care how late it was.

Being so late only a couple people saw the dressed up women leaving the Normandy but it wouldn't take long for scuttlebutt to hear of it.

Walking the well lit streets towards the nearest taxi vehicle parking lot the coolness of the evening didn't bother either Miranda or Shepard.

Shepard would have liked to reach over and hold Miranda's hand but felt it was an entirely school girl thing to do so kept her hands to herself. She was very pleased that she'd been able to make Miranda actually laugh by teasing her about her dress while making it clear she thought Miranda looked beautiful.

"So where are we going?" Miranda asked curiously.

"Hey I distinctly remember you asked _me_ out. Aren't you supposed to have a destination in mind?" Shepard grinned at her.

Miranda arched her brow, "I'd just meant in the Loft, Commander."

Shepard's grin wavered slightly at both her wrong assumption and being called Commander as opposed to Steph, "Oh. Well I just figured seeing as we're actually at a nice place as opposed to scooting around the Terminus..." she cleared her throat and slowed her pace a little, "We could go to Eternity, that's not far, or we could go back to the Loft..." Her tone was a little strained in its forced cheerfulness.

"Steph," Miranda's voice was actually gentle for a change at the instant disappointment and self-recrimination she felt from Shepard, "I'd much rather go out somewhere nice while we have the chance. I'm glad you thought of it." she assured her calmly, turning back a little to flash a disarming smile at Shepard.

Shepard blushed but relaxed and smiled, "Good. I don't actually know anywhere decent other than Eternity though."

"Well then, I know the perfect place." Miranda nodded and led the way.

In true Miranda Lawson style the 'perfect place' turned out to be a very classy establishment atop the Keluah Tower. Keluah was primarily business offices of wealthy contractors, however, the top floors were dedicated to a lavish and expensive hotel with associated commodities such as a restaurants, bars, dance club, casino, massage rooms, spa's and other luxuries to both indulge the senses and encourage clients to spend a few more credits.

Miranda had stayed in the extravagant hotel numerous times for though it had the option of some of the more sensual indulgences like Azure it was nowhere near as... trashy. Azure felt more like a whorehouse in comparison to the upper class accommodations of Keluah.

Shepard did her best not to let her jaw drop or eyes turn into saucers as she followed Miranda into the bar.

The designers had kept the bar smaller than expected to add to its exclusive feel. The dominant themes of the bar appeared to be the night sky and water. The roof was a velvety dark blue that was almost black and dotted with little blue lights in the imitation of stars. The actual lights were exquisite clear crystal pieces of art, like someone had tried glass-blowing with diamonds and filled the curving nest of vines with streams of blue light. At the end of each vine was a small sphere of light, that in conjunction with all the other small sphere's, gave off a soft glow which reflected off the water features below.

In the centre of the room the largest water feature softly bubbled away, a soft 's' in shape with two tables tucked in either side of the curves. It was a mesmerizing sight of sweeping whorls of similar clear crystal as the lights, so smooth in form to be almost hypnotic in watching the flow of water bubble over its surfaces.

Seating was arranged in secluded circular pods for the most part. There were a few 'open' tables with padded chairs arranged through the centre of the room but by and large the pods both looked far more comfortable and had more clients reclining in them than the tables for privacy. Smaller water features curved around numerous pods but were nowhere near as dominating as the central feature.

Music played quietly in the background, soft asari wind instruments to float along with the sounds of trickling water.

While Shepard was trying hard not to gawk she managed to follow Miranda to a private pod in a subtly darker corner of the bar. Sliding in it was automatic for both women to position themselves where they could see the rest of the room, which meant at the back of the U-shaped pod almost side by side but with enough distance between them to be able to comfortably face each other.

Miranda tapped the table to activate the holographic ordering system.

Shepard was more interested in the padded seat at the moment, pressing down on it and bouncing a little, "Now _this_ is nice." Her grin excited and eyes twinkling with delight.

Miranda smirked, Shepard was right but she wasn't about to make a big deal of it as to her this was 'normal', one of her usual haunts when on Illium and needing some space from inferior Cerberus operatives.

"Though I'm curious, and this _may_ just be the uncivilized marine in me, but wouldn't all these water fountains make people need to go to the bathroom more often? They'd have to have some pretty decent bathrooms." Shepard mused as she quickly got comfortable leaning back into the plush padding that reached higher than her head to add to the feel of being alone with Miranda.

Miranda shook her head with a soft chuckle, "That they do." was all she said on _that_ particular line of conversation. "What would you like to drink?" she asked instead.

Shepard leaned forward and began to scroll through, this didn't feel like a regular Ice Brandy establishment so she ordered an asari wine that was produced on Thessia, sweet but potent apparently. She'd see if it had _any_ effect on her.

Miranda was surprised by the choice, she'd expected her to order a brandy but then Shepard had stocked her cooler with an assortment of beverages and not just the favoured brandy.

"So you been here often?" Shepard asked conversationally.

"Yes. I've worked from Illium quite a lot, with the right permits there is little considered to be illegal in terms of resources here." Miranda acknowledged and having set up the privacy shield after ordering her own wine she let herself relax and turn her attention to Shepard.

"Of course." Shepard sighed, bloody Cerberus. "So other than relaxing in bars and playing piano what do you do to relax these days?" she changed the subject not wanting to spoil her thoughts on things to do with the Illusive Man.

"I rarely have the time to relax, Steph, there's always something that requires my personal attention to resolve. Here and playing piano are my favourite ways to relax." she admitted with a wistful smile as just mentioning piano had her picturing Shepard's playing earlier.

"So you wouldn't be opposed to my playing for you every now and then?" Shepard asked, rather shyly, her face a little lower and eyes on her twiddling fingers just below the table.

Miranda looked to her quickly at that soft offer and beamed, "I'd enjoy that."

Shepard couldn't help the buzz of excitement at that, having to stop herself from thinking of things she could play for Miri right now.

Comfortable small talk ensued that was relaxing. The first time in years either of them could just put everything aside for a few minutes with a friend. A few drinks into the evening had Miranda loosening up considerably though Shepard had yet to feel any kind of tingle or buzz from the alcohol she'd consumed, much to her dismay.

Shepard frowned at the sudden shift in Miranda, there'd been a lull in their conversation, not an uncomfortable one though. Whatever Miranda was thinking about was clearly upsetting for her, "Miri?" She reached over and lightly put her hand over Miranda's, waiting for Miranda to look at her so she could search those gorgeous blue eyes. "What're you thinking about?"

Miranda didn't pull her hand away from Shepard's warm touch even with knowing that Shepard could now feel what she was feeling far more easily. "When you were speaking with Garrus about Cerberus and... me, you mentioned several things."

Shepard didn't say anything but the entire atmosphere around them had certainly changed.

"I know I'm just a tool for Cerberus, I was for my father until I fled. Being a tool I knew my place, where I fit in the world given... how I came to be." she was studying her wine intently. "Everything about me has been engineered, my looks, my biotics, my intelligence. The only thing I can take credit for are my mistakes." her tone was sad but filled with conviction.

Shepard took a deep breath and spoke only when it was clear Miranda had finished. How could she respond to that deeply held belief, as Steph or the Commander? "Miranda," she reached over with her other hand to hold Miranda's in both of hers.

Miranda couldn't look at her just yet so closed her eyes, keeping her face lowered.

"I don't want a tool, I don't want to use you like that, as though your sole purpose is one particular thing that you can be discarded for once the task is complete." she shook her head at the thought, "You are under my command yes, but you are a living, breathing, intelligent being whose life and soul I value greatly. _Who_ you are is far more important to me than _what_ you can do because what you _choose_ to do and how you _choose_ to act is determined by _who_ you are." She spoke with soft passion, a mix of Steph and the Commander in the response.

Miranda glanced up at Shepard with the glistening of unshed tears in her eyes at not only those deeply personal words but the associated tenderness and _love_ Shepard was sharing with her through their connection.

"Miri, you are so much more than the foundation you were given." she thought quickly, "Please don't hit me for this but I'm a simple marine so bear with me." she smiled and sat forward a little, inching closer to Miranda.

Miranda's brow rose slightly, Shepard was anything _but_ simple and her proximity was starting to have an effect on her.

"Think of yourself like the Normandy. It's the most powerful ship humans have, it has a super intelligent AI for a brain, it has all the bells and whistles it could possibly need and goddess is she a gorgeous looking ship." she smiled, "But without the _captain_ it has no meaning, no goal, no purpose, no _soul_." she cleared her throat, "Not that I'm comparing myself to being the soul of the ship or anything." she quickly asserted.

Miranda rolled her eyes, "Just keep talking Shepard, I'm sure there's a shovel somewhere around here."

Shepard grinned and continued on quickly, "What I'm trying to say is that your father gave you the ship, but _you_ are the captain. Everything you do, the good, the bad, the ugly, the magnificent, it's _all you_. All your choices. _You_ decide where you go in your life, how you use your skills and the foundation you've been given. No one else can take the credit for anything you've done because it's all been _you_. _You_ are the captain of your life and you are no mere tool Miri. You are bloody amazing woman, especially right here." she leaned forward and tapped between Miranda's breasts over her heart with an empowering smile.

Miranda was a little lost for words. Though she perhaps wouldn't have compared herself to a ship she understood what Shepard was trying to tell her and was actually rather eloquent in the delivery of. "I... thank you Shepard." It would take her some time to truly believe it but the fact that she could even consider it, that Shepard believed it with all her heart...

Shepard smiled tenderly, lifting Miranda's hand she turned it to kiss the palm of her hand, not breaking eye contact with the stunning woman beside her.

Perhaps it was the alcohol warming her or just the magnetic pull coming from Shepard but Miranda found herself caressing Shepard's cheek. Then she was leaning in, reaching out with her other hand and sliding it across that warm plane of Shepard's toned stomach, feeling the muscles ripple beneath her touch, reaching around to her hip and pulling her closer. She closed her eyes as their lips touched, Shepard's soft, compliant beneath hers and tasting of sweet asari wine, her scent that was entirely _Shepard_ was intoxicating. She wasn't even fully aware of what she expected from Shepard but when the beautiful marine pulled her closer, deepening the kiss, a moan rumbled through her chest and hungrily she pushed Shepard back against the seat. Pressing up against her, running her fingers through that soft brown hair, her hand sliding up Shepard's side underneath her shirt. She was lost to the world around her outside of Shepard and the burning desire that was welling up within her fiercely.

Shepard only broke the kiss when she needed air, turning her face slightly and gasping for breath. She moaned as the action caused Miranda's full, moist lips to begin tracing her jaw. Turning her face more opened up her neck to the passionate exploration of this woman she'd loved for so long, who'd set the bar for every other relationship she'd ever had causing them all to ultimately fail... for none were Miranda Solheim.

Miranda felt the rapidly beating pulse of Shepard as she lingered on the sensitive spot over the carotid artery and gently sucked on the soft skin.

"Goddess..." Shepard breathed as it sent a surge of hot desire due south and reactively she gripped Miranda tighter.

The alabaster skin of the perfect woman would be marred by bruises from Shepard's powerful grip but right now it only served to encourage her further. Until her movements were stopped by a sharp pain in her hip as she found the table blocking her from getting closer to Shepard and she hissed, pulling back sharply to glare at the offending object.

It was enough of a reprieve for Shepard's clouded mind to remember where they were and that Miranda still had no idea who she was. "You okay?" she asked softly, breathlessly, gently rubbing Miranda's hip.

Miranda seemed to gather her wits again and her already flushed cheeks darkened. She pulled away quickly, putting some distance between them and clearing her throat, "Yes." she answered Shepard's question a little more brusquely than she'd intended.

Shepard smiled at the embarrassment coming from Miranda so sighed contentedly, "That was incredible, I don't think I've _ever_ been kissed like that."

Miranda felt a flutter of satisfaction and smiled, it was a sentiment she'd heard from others but from Stephanie Shepard it actually _meant_ something, "You weren't so bad either."

Shepard chuckled and very lightly hit Miranda's arm, "Not so bad huh? Think I need some practice do you?" She decided it would be a bad idea to add that 'practice makes perfect' considering it was Miranda she was talking to and their earlier conversation.

Miranda huffed, "I don't _practice_, Shepard."

"Need to find someone else do I? Massani'd definitely be game, Garrus'd pose a bit of a challenge with those turian lip plates and I'm sure Jacob'd follow orders..." she laughed as Miranda's icy cold glare landed on her, she deliberately hadn't mentioned any of the girls in case Miranda got the wrong idea. She held up her hands innocently with a cheeky grin to show she was just teasing.

Miranda's glare melted and she rolled her eyes.

It wasn't long after that heated kiss that they departed the Keluah, Shepard paying for the drinks of course, and returned to the Normandy. Their 'friends-date' had most definitely turned into a 'date-date'.

When the doors of the elevator opened up onto deck three Miranda found herself wondering if she should say goodnight now or...

While Miranda was hesitating Shepard took her hand and gently pulled her out with a smile, the taller woman quickly fell into step behind her until they rounded the corner and walked side by side with her. Shepard noted the mess was clear of people, it was four in the morning after all.

Stopping outside Miranda's quarters Miranda keyed in her security code and the door hissed open going to lead Shepard inside she was stopped as the woman didn't move to follow her.

"I'm going to say goodnight here Miri." Shepard said softly.

Miranda turned back to her, a little surprised... and disappointed.

Shepard stepped up to her and kissed her in what she'd intended to be just a chaste kiss on the lips.

Miranda had other ideas. Her arms were around Shepard's strong, slender body in a heartbeat, pulling her close and deepening the kiss once more. She felt a light touch on her hip and found herself guided to the wall, moaning as Shepard's warm body pressed her against the cold bulkhead.

It was incredibly difficult for Shepard to pull back from the searing kiss, but pull back she did, eyes locked with Miri's.

Even though those dark eyes were unfamiliar still there was no mistaking the love that shone through them and it made Miranda's pounding heart almost skip a beat. No one had ever looked at her like _that _before.

Smiling, Shepard stepped right back, hands to her sides, "I had a wonderful time tonight, thank you Miri. I guess the next one will be in the Loft's Lounge." She winked and before Miranda could protest at her departure she turned and strode back to the elevator knowing that if she didn't leave now she'd be following that goddess of a woman back into her quarters and it was just too soon for that.

Miranda watched her go, a feeling fluttering through her that she'd never thought she'd truly experience. While still largely undefined within herself she knew what it was, she knew it because she could already feel it in Shepard, in Steph. God she wanted her memory back! She wanted to _remember_ all of the woman who was capturing her heart.

* * *

><p><em><strong>So I'd thought about chucking a spanner in the works, maybe Liara calling to say she's got intel on Samara or Thane because being an info broker she's been watching for Shep of course and jealously wants to interrupt the date cos she loves Shep... but then I figured with all the trouble I've put these two through they deserve one night of uninterrupted romance... one night ;)<strong>_

_**Always love reviews!**_

_**[After post note: I wasn't overly happy with the original opening paragraph... it just didn't sit right so I edited it a little and picked up a few typos so it should be all good now!]  
><strong>_


	32. Breaking the Broker

After ringing the door chime to Miranda's quarters and being allowed entry into her private domain Shepard stood before the workstation of the beautiful operative who was still typing away but had the smallest of smiles gracing her lips.

Miranda glanced up when Shepard didn't say anything and noticed that Shepard was openly admiring her. Generally she was used to people staring at her chest or arse, and Shepard herself had been quite guilty of that, but right now those dark brown eyes were drinking in her face not her body. That was surprising and felt so much more personal, it made her cheeks flush a little and in turn that caused Shepard's smile to widen.

It was Miranda's voice who broke the silence between them, "Is this about the message from Liara?" she asked in her normal business tone.

Both smiles faded at the mention of it for Liara had quite pointedly asked Shepard how her date had gone with Operative Lawson along with informing her she had information concerning the Justicar Samara.

Shepard nodded, "Yes."

"We need that information, there's nothing to discuss unless you wish me to join you." Miranda sat back from her console, a challenge in her eyes.

"A couple things." Shepard's posture was not that of Steph but of the Commander, back straight, shoulders back, feet apart and expression serious. "First," the Commander posture waivered a little as she tried to find the right words and frowned when she just couldn't find them.

Miranda's brow rose at the frustration emanating from Shepard, "Just say what you're thinking Steph." she instructed with a touch more softness to her tone than before.

Shepard took a deep, nervous breath before just saying it, "I want to remind you of the conversation you overheard between Garrus and I where I told him there was nothing romantic between Liara and I. I wasn't sure if you'd appreciate being reminded though..."

Miranda rose from her workstation and sauntered around to the anxious Commander with a confident smile.

Shepard had already half turned towards Miranda, wondering just what her XO was going to do as this didn't seem like typical behaviour but she wasn't picking up any anger or annoyance coming from her. In fact it was more cocky assurance than anything else... which now had her slightly worried...

Miranda reached up and slid one hand up and behind Shepard's neck, running her fingers through that soft hair, while the other hand possessively pulled Shepard's hip against her.

Shepard gasped at the bold move, her heart rate spiking quickly as did the heat within her when those full, luscious lips closed the distance between them and claimed her. Her arms instinctively wrapped around Miranda, her left hand running up that slender back to take hold of Miranda's left shoulder while her right hand gripped around behind Miranda's hip. She was really wishing that she wasn't in her armour as Miranda pressed up against her.

Miranda smiled a little at the small moan from Steph and lightly sucked on her lower lip before pulling away to whisper in her ear, "I'm fairly confident that you're mine, Stephanie."

"Really? Don't need more convincing? I'd be happy to...ugh..." Her breathless teasing was cut off by a moan as Miranda's lips found that sweet spot she'd discovered last night.

"I'm convinced." Miranda murmured and released the now very hot and flustered Shepard, feeling quite victorious and pleased with herself as she returned to her workstation.

It took a moment or two for Shepard to catch her breath, "Just so you know, that doesn't mean I'm going to magically agree with you on everything, no matter how amazing your kissing is." she asserted with a mock scowl.

Miranda was smirking in delight at having so affected Shepard and also needing a few moments to cool off, "Of course Shepard." she purred in a tone that was clearly saying, 'you have no idea'.

Shepard's eyes narrowed a little but she decided calling Miranda on it was probably not a good idea when she wanted to pin the woman to her chair and return the favour in getting her all hot and flustered. "Okay so next thing, I _do _care about Liara as a friend even though I'm mad at her right now and taking you with me will only rub salt in the wounds. But that _doesn't_ mean that if she asks I won't tell her how much I enjoyed last night with you." she grinned, her eyes sparkling.

Miranda was appeased by that, she'd wanted to go give that asari a piece of her mind. "I enjoyed it too Steph, thank you." she flashed a seductive smile up at Steph, "I might even say yes if you ask me out on an actual date." she winked.

"Might huh? I'll have to keep that in mind." Shepard smirked, using Miranda's favourite line when it came to these things.

Miranda just smiled and nodded in acknowledgement of the phrasing.

The Commander posture finally returned, "Next, I'm guessing the intel Liara has on Samara will lead us to her. I'm going to take Garrus with me, I don't want to take too many people to make her think we're pressuring her into this. From what I can understand of Justicars the asari are as equally terrified of them as they do revere them and honour them with the utmost respect." Shepard was expecting an argument from her XO and wasn't disappointed.

"Therefore you don't want a Cerberus representative or a loose cannon with you when you meet her." There was a flash of anger in Miranda's eyes at that and it snapped through their connection almost physically.

Shepard almost winced, "Yes." she answered firmly anyway, "You know how others view Cerberus and a Justicar is honour bound by their code to kill all who act unjustly. Cerberus fits that bill perfectly as though it attests to advancing humanity it's also performed many horrific experiments to do so." she justified herself to Miranda evenly.

"So how exactly are you going to be able to convince her to stay her hand and _not_ honour her code should she accept joining the mission?" Miranda shot at her quickly, it was a very legitimate question.

"Don't know that yet, but I'll figure something out or I just won't ask her to join us. I highly doubt even _I_ could stop a Justicar from what I've read." Shepard sighed, she really had no idea and had planned on asking Liara about it but that would really depend on how well their discussion went...

Miranda tilted her head a little, "You really do sell yourself short. You're highly intelligent yet you constantly belittle it and with all the changes you've undergone you are incredibly powerful so don't write yourself out just yet." she encouraged the woman before her.

Shepard blushed, she really didn't want to get into the reason why she tended to underwrite herself with Miranda just yet. "Yes well I already have the reputation for blowing everything up and shooting every batarian I see, what the hell would they say about me killing a Justicar? Besides I'd have every _asari_ after my arse for that and not in the melding kind of way."

Miranda smirked, though once again reminded that the asari seemed to be drawn to Shepard like moths to flame. "I can imagine they wouldn't be happy and the Council would disown you again, with Justicars only attacking the unjust after all."

"So even more reason to be treading cautiously with this one. I _really_ don't want to piss her off."

Miranda was amused, "And here I thought the great Commander Shepard feared nothing."

Shepard cocked her head slightly, not smiling at the teasing remark at first but a small one did touch the corner of her lips eventually, "Of course not, if anyone _did_ find out what I feared I'd be in serious trouble with how many people out there would _love_ to see me break."

The amusement was gone at the heaviness that came over Shepard that was felt by Miranda through their connection.

Miranda actually shut down her console, "Want to talk about it?" she asked softly, standing to move to the lounge in her bed area with a gesture for Shepard to come.

Shepard shifted her weight from one foot to the other uncomfortably, "Later?"

Miranda considered her for a moment then nodded, "Whenever you're ready Steph." talking about one's fears was not an easy thing to do, especially if you were someone like Commander Stephanie Shepard who carried the weight of so many on her shoulders it was surprising she could still stand let alone function.

Shepard nodded, she would have preferred _never_ but later she could work around. "I'll keep you updated on any new information about Samara."

Miranda sat back down and flicked on her console once more, "I'll be waiting."

Shepard hesitated, not sure how to leave exactly... what was she supposed to say now?

Miranda glanced up at Shepard's hesitation.

Shepard sighed and shrugged to herself, "Later Miri."

"Steph." Miranda gave a small smile at the slightly awkward retreating form of Shepard, it was a little endearing to see her like that.

Shepard glanced up at Garrus as she stood just outside Liara's office door.

"I'll wait out here." he nodded in understanding and moved to an out of the way place that had a good view of everything that could come in to this area of the building.

Shepard just nodded, relieved. She hoped she wouldn't need her best friend's strong turian shoulders to cry on if Liara threw another dagger in her heart today.

Neither Garrus nor Shepard were aware that a third member of the Normandy crew had followed them and was sticking to the shadows like an invisible wraith.

Liara had been anticipating Stephanie this time and merely nodded in acknowledgment when the human Spectre walked in. Stephanie's stride and posture was that of the Commander and mentally Liara could understand that. She had known as soon as those scathing words had left her lips that she had ripped right through that tender heart hidden behind the armour of so many titles. The title _Commander_ fitted her so well for it summed up her whole being. She _commanded_ and you obeyed, she led and you followed, she smiled and the suns were dimmed by her radiance. This powerful and charismatic woman had let Liara into her heart, not as deeply as Liara had wanted but closer than all but one before her, and Liara had cut it to the core, she had wounded that loyal, warm and honourable heart.

Shepard opted to stand this time and nodded to Liara in return, "Liara, you have information for me?" she noted and ignored the tiny flash of emotion in those blue eyes, didn't even take the time to analyse it.

"Straight to business then." Liara's tone was as stiff as her posture, her heart hurting and knowing that this was all her fault, Steph had come to her with open arms though still struggling with all that had happened and she had in one moment dashed the heart of her beloved friend.

"Unless you have something else you want to say?" Shepard's eyes narrowed and she waited, did Liara even know how much her words had hurt?

Liara desperately wanted to say sorry but those were not the words that came, "How was your date with Operative Lawson? The Keluah Tower is very nice." the tone was cutting and accusatory.

Shepard's eyes flashed red and her biotics were close to flaring, "The jealous school girl routine really isn't your thing Liara." she growled.

Liara flushed and looked away quickly from Shepard's anger.

"If you're wanting to know as a friend then yes, I had a wonderful time with Miri. It was the first time in _years_ either of us could take some time out to actually _relax_ before the shit hits the fan with the Collectors and Reapers and whatever other fucked up thing the universe wants to throw at us." Shepard's voice was low, the huskiness that had been in her voice since waking up on Lazarus more pronounced.

"Oh yes, very relaxing having her in your lap. Is that how Cerberus is keeping your loyalty? Warming your bed with a piece of..." Liara spat through her teeth but was cut off as Shepard lashed out at her furiously.

"Don't you _dare_ finish that sentence T'Soni." Shepard slammed her fist down on the desk so hard it actually warped beneath her.

Liara jumped back, startled at the aggressive display and the terrifying fury that emanated from Shepard. Yes she'd seen it before but _never_ aimed at herself.

Outside even Nyxeris jumped a little and that caused both Garrus and the third member from the Normandy to pay closer attention to the asari. The third member beginning to scan for more specific things.

Shepard clenched her jaw and tried to reign in her biotics before they flared dangerously.

There was silence for a long moment as Liara was just too afraid to talk right now and Shepard really didn't want to say something she'd regret.

"I don't _know_ what your fucking problem is Liara. I wouldn't be working with Cerberus if I had another choice and you know I couldn't love you like you wanted me to. You've _always_ known that." Her voice was soft but still held an angry growl to it.

"Because you felt you had to protect me, that I was too weak for you..." Liara whispered, tears in her eyes.

"Not weak, you were _never_ weak. You were pure and innocent and _young_, you didn't have the emotional foundation to be able to handle all of me without being twisted into something you weren't." Shepard argued instantly, shaking her head at Liara.

Liara stood in angry frustration, "All my life I've had people telling me I'm too young, _nothing_ I've ever done or felt has been taken seriously because _I'm too young_!"

Shepard bit her lip to stop the angry retort about her behaving like a teenager just proved she was exactly that, too young.

The third member scowled as she found the open frequency Nyxeris was listening to and heard the emotional and angry voice of Shepard.

"What you wanted from me was not the same as publishing your research. Intelligence and emotional maturity..." she stopped at the fury that radiated from Liara.

"So you thought me to be _immature?" _Liara seethed, her biotics shimmering.

"Not immature, just not _ready,_ we grow and learn over time and by interacting with others. You spent most of your life _alone_ Liara, you didn't have enough experience in dealing with other people let alone someone with my problems." Shepard shot back in angry frustration.

Outside the soundproofed office Garrus leapt from his seemingly casual position when Nyxeris suddenly slumped in her chair.

Kasumi appeared out of nowhere with a grim expression on her partially covered face, "She's spying on them." she explained gravely.

Garrus growled, "Find out who she was spying for." He turned to go inform Shepard, surprised by the appearance of the little human but not questioning her.

"Don't go in there yet. From what I heard, it's not pretty at the moment." Kasumi warned, pushing the unconscious body of the asari aside and starting to hack her console. As curious as she was by nature she had a feeling that this argument was one she'd deeply regret listening in on.

Garrus stopped and instead turned his attention to securing the asari.

"Yet that didn't stop you from coming to _me_ for comfort." Liara reminded her pointedly, waving her hand at Shepard.

"Did I ever tell you what I needed that comfort _for?_ You think it was just because of the stress of Saren or losing Alenko or being railroaded by the Council and Udina? No! I came to you for a _very different reason _and as a _friend_, you're one of my _best friends_. Everything I kept from you was to protect you from myself. You _think_ you know all there is to know of me, that through the melds you saw all that is within me." Shepard shook her head, "You're wrong. I purposefully hid the darkest parts of myself from you. The part of me that I have to fight every day to keep locked away, the beast in me that rages at the sight of suffering and slavers. You want to see it find some footage from Torfan, you'll see what I did to those Batarians and understand exactly why the Butcher of Torfan was a title _well deserved_."

Liara recoiled, she had never believed that was true, that it had all been political hand washing to try and appease the Batarian's from outright war by saying it was all Shepard's fault and that she'd gone too far.

"I ripped them apart, limb from limb, with my fucking bare hands Liara." she held up her clenched fists that were glowing biotically and shook them at the dumbstruck asari. "I did the fucking same thing with my biotics on Omega to those Blue Suns bastards who thought it was okay to murder innocent little kids for just being human."

Liara sunk back down into her seat, staring up at Stephanie in shock and disbelief.

"_That_ is a part of me I have to live with every single day. Something I had to keep from tainting you with every breath of my being because it would have _killed_ me if it did. Yet here you are, threatening people and channelling the very darkness of your mother when Sovereign indoctrinated her. And when I got on my _knees _and _begged_ you not to go down that road, not to become what you hunt you throw it all back in my face telling me I'm with fucking _Cerberus_." There were unshed tears in Shepard's eyes now that looked so at odds with how red and angry they were.

Liara's shoulders sagged with shame and regret, tears now streaming down her own cheeks.

Shepard stalked over to the window, looking out over the bustling marketplace below with one clenched fist against the glass, the other hanging stiffly by her side.

The silence stretched on between them painfully.

Shepard was waiting for _something_ from Liara, even a simple acknowledgement that Liara had hurt her or was sorry.

Liara was struggling to find the words. Shepard had been right that she had known little about interacting with others, in two years she'd learned a lot but not nearly enough for this.

Shepard groaned and pressed her head against the cool glass, "Fuck. Just give me the bloody information you called me here for T'Soni." she grunted, her heart _aching_ and it came through her voice.

"That's it? All of that and you... you're going to just leave?" Liara sobbed, not quite believing what she'd just heard from Shepard.

"What _more_ do you want from me?" Shepard hit the window with her fist and it cracked, "Isn't this hurting you enough? Because it's fucking breaking my heart Liara. Can't you even see that?" she hissed as her throat was so tight it was hard to breathe let alone talk.

The words finally came at the grief stricken plea from Shepard, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Stephanie. I didn't mean what I said and I deeply regret saying it."

"Which part? That you think I'm a Cerberus lackey or that you think Miranda is using her body to keep me in line like I'm some horny little teenager?" Shepard scoffed and glared over at Liara, "Are you sorry for _spying_ on me in a private moment or trying to tarnish the amazing night I shared with the woman I love?"

Liara recoiled her face falling even further in emotional agony as she realized that the manipulative, cold and heartless Miranda Lawson had done what she'd never been able to do. Miranda Lawson had captured Commander Shepard's heart, whatever this darkness Stephanie had been afraid of tainting her with she felt as though she could share it with Miranda without tainting her. "All of it, I'm sorry for all of it." She took a deep, shaky breath, "But even more so what I said about Cerberus. Did they... did they ever tell you how they recovered your body?"

Warning bells began to ring in Shepard's mind, she stood rigidly by the window, "No, only that the Shadow Broker wanted me and it was quite the fight to get my body." her voice was low, wary.

Liara gripped the edge of her desk, her shoulders shaking a little, "_I_ gave you to them." she whispered brokenly.

Shepard had been standing still before but now she barely moved, barely _breathed_.

"I-I couldn't let you go, they said they could bring you back. I knew that if they could, if it was truly possible that they'd use you for their own purposes and I... I let it happen." she finally admitted what had been eating at her soul these past two years and waited for the enraged consequences.

The silence between them was only verbal as Shepard internally raged and her biotics cracked and sizzled dangerously.

Garrus and Kasumi looked up at the sound of running heels and were shocked when Miranda burst around the corner with a look of fierce determination on her face.

"Uh, I wouldn't go in there right now Miranda." Kasumi advised.

Miranda ignored her, if she was going to calm Shepard down she had to be free from anger herself and that was incredibly difficult this close to the epicentre of the raging biotic she was connected to. She had been walking briskly through the marketplace until moments ago when something in Shepard had clicked, the wrong way, and that darkness she'd been so scared of tainting Liara with was clawing ferociously at her, at them _both _through their connection.

Liara glanced up as the door to her office opened, she had no voice to berate who she assumed would by Nyxeris because she was actually _terrified_ of Shepard right now. Her eyes widened at the sight of the raven haired ice queen whose sole attention was focussed on Shepard and a significant part of her was relieved at the intrusion.

Shepard didn't even realize Miranda was in the room until a warm hand firmly turned her cheek and she found herself glaring into beautiful cobalt blues.

Miranda knew that speaking to Shepard in this state was pointless, instead she _poured _herself into Shepard, soothed that savage beast until it began to still its clawing. Then she leaned in and kissed Shepard, lightly at first, waiting to see how Shepard would respond.

It took a few moments for Shepard to register that Miranda's lips were caressing her own. When it did she moaned and wrapped her arms around her beautiful XO, deepening the kiss with desperation, needing the contact, the warmth, the tenderness and assurance that was filling her, flooding her from the incredible woman in her arms.

Miranda only parted their lips when the anger had completely drained from Shepard and just held her close, cradling her like a child. She closed her eyes again when Shepard buried her face in the crook of her neck and she could feel the hot tears dampening her uniform.

Liara had never witnessed anything like what she was seeing. She had seen love, had longed for it with Shepard, but this... what these two women shared was so much _more_. They were physically _melding._ That should be impossible for two humans! Miranda's mere presence was enough to break through that raging fury, what she assumed was the darkness Shepard had warned her about, had tried to protect her from. Too emotionally distraught to really think of what this was or could mean intellectually or if it was some kind of controlling mechanism Cerberus had put into Shepard to link her to their top operative, she was just grateful that Shepard was no longer angry and did _not_ want to provoke her again. The thought that telling Shepard about her involvement in handing her to Cerberus after already having such a heated argument had probably not been very wise of her crossed her mind.

Emotionally drained and exhausted Shepard took a deep breath, drinking in the scent of Miranda before stepping back and releasing her.

Miranda wordlessly wiped the tears from Shepard's cheeks tenderly and searched her eyes asking with thoughts whispered directly to Shepard's mind, _Are you alright now?_

Shepard nodded, "Thank you." she murmured, her huskiness pronounced once again.

_Would you like me to stay or are you ready to go?_

"I'll be a couple minutes... if you could wait for me?" Shepard asked softly, hopefully.

"Of course Steph." Miranda nodded and brushed her lips against Shepard's lightly one last time before turning to leave. Though she did take a moment to level Liara with a scathing glare before turning her back on her and walking out.

Shepard took a deep breath and wiped her cheeks with the heels of her hands before slumping in one of the chairs facing Liara, elbows on her knees and face in her hands.

Still Liara didn't dare speak.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Shepard straightened and looked to Liara with her Commander mask firmly in place to hide the hurt she was feeling, "Liara, I'm not angry at you for giving me to Cerberus." her tone was almost calm but still carried an edge to it.

Surprise filled those blue asari eyes and her brow furrowed in confusion.

"I'm doing what no one else can and you allowed me to have a second chance at so much more than just life." she shook her head at the asari she was used to seeing so mild-mannered and not who lashed out at her for reasons she still didn't quite grasp. "What I was angry about was the fact that you _knew_ I had no choice, that I would _have_ to work with Cerberus, and you had the _gall_ to accuse me of doing just that as though I now embraced every doctrine Cerberus spouts, betraying all that I am and believe." that edge to her voice sharpened but her face remained masked.

"I said I was sorry." Liara bit her lip to try and stop it from trembling.

"Yet it's still what you thought or you wouldn't have said it in the first place." Shepard pointed out quickly.

"Cerberus is an insidious organization, I had no way of knowing if they altered your personality in any way..." Liara's voice trailed off at the soft red glow that was returning to Shepard's eyes, "But I see now that they haven't. You will do the right thing, you always do the right thing."

Shepard sighed, the glow fading again, "Not always. I make mistakes, I'm not perfect Liara, I never have been and I never will be. I _try_ to do the right thing, but sometimes what people consider 'right' isn't an option. People wouldn't have considered giving my body to Cerberus was right, but there was no other option. People wouldn't consider me working with them now that I'm awake and have a choice in the matter right, but there is _no other option_. The ends don't always justify the means but sometimes those means are bloody and dirty and there's no way around it so it's a matter of choosing the path of less destruction."

Liara nodded, she didn't have the words to respond but what Shepard had said began to shift the weight of guilt that had settled on her heart.

Shepard pulled off her armoured glove, leaned across and held out her hand, palm up on Liara's damaged desk.

Liara slid her hand into the warmth and strength of Shepard's without hesitation.

"Now I think we _both_ need some time to recover, hmm?" Shepard gave that slender blue hand a gentle squeeze.

Liara sighed, "Yes. Thank you for... for understanding why I did it." she managed a sheepish smile, "I have to admit I thought you'd hate me... or kill me for a moment there."

Shepard released Liara's hand and rose to her feet with a grave expression, "You're lucky Miranda came, I almost _did_ lose control of myself. Please don't _ever_ do anything like that again, it'd kill me if I hurt you."

Liara's brow furrowed, "You... that anger has been in you this whole time?" she asked softly.

"It's not anger per say but I can lose control of it if greatly angered. Perhaps if we hadn't had the earlier argument it wouldn't have been a problem but compounded..." Shepard lowered her face, looking at her hand as she pulled on her glove, "On the battlefield it serves its purpose, my enemies should fear me for a very good reason. Thing is few of them ever _live_ to warn others about it." She smirked darkly.

"I can certainly see why." Liara was a little shaky when she accessed her terminal and sent the information she'd gathered on Samara to Shepard's omni-tool.

Shepard's omni-tool lit up and she looked at it automatically, "I'll have Miranda send the funds."

"No don't, please, this is... I can't help you on your mission in any other way." Liara rejected the idea quickly.

"Thanks Liara. If I hear anything that can help you I'll pass it on. How about next time you've got information for me, say about a certain assassin, we go for a drink instead of yelling at each other." Shepard suggested a touch ruefully.

"That would be very agreeable, Stephanie." Liara gave a relieved smile.

"Well then, until next time stay out of trouble." Shepard flicked off her omni-tool and mock saluted before heading out.

"You to Stephanie." Liara slumped back in her chair, exhausted from the tumultuous meeting.

Shepard was so ready to just get out of there but stopped suspiciously at the way her trio were gathered around the secretaries console.

"Hey Shep, you should get Liara out here, seems her secretary was working for the Shadow Broker." Kasumi flicked her wrist at the still unconscious asari.

Shepard took a half step back, turning to see if Liara had heard.

Liara was already on her feet with a scowl firmly in place.

"She had a secondary drive hidden in her console, it's got some _very_ interesting files." Kasumi stepped aside for Liara to take a seat and begin looking over it herself.

"Garrus, Kasumi stay and give Liara a hand?" she asked them softly.

Both were very concerned at the pale face and slightly red rimmed eyes of their Commander so nodded without hesitation.

"Let me know if you need anything else." Shepard didn't have the energy to stay and help right now and knew that between the three of them they'd sort out the problem.

"Thank you but I can handle this." Liara assured her firmly.

"Alright, we'll leave you to it." Shepard nodded and glanced at Miranda, a question in her eyes.

Miranda understood, Shepard needed a brandy big time, she tilted her head in acknowledgement that she'd accompany her.

Only Kasumi noticed the look Shepard and Miranda shared as they both turned and strode away. She smirked, "Hey Garrus we really need to get you some new armour."

"This armour is spirit blessed. I'd be dead without it." Garrus argued, not even about to consider giving it up.

"It's got a huge chunk carved out of it!" Kasumi countered, eager to go shopping with the turian.

"Shepard bought it for me." Garrus stated as if that was the be all and end all of their debate.

"So mount it in a special display but I'm pretty sure she'd be more than happy to spring you for another set." Kasumi grinned at his sentimental attachment that was not typically turian.

Liara glanced over at the fading conversation, she too had a display of armour she was very attached to at home and could certainly understand why Garrus wouldn't want to part with his beloved armour.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Phew I guess all the angst I didn't put into the previous chapter all ended up in here!<strong>_

_**So you may have noticed this chapter was a little delayed... A couple really good reasons! Though one is NOT TOR *sad face***_

_**1. I posted up the next chapter to The Voice of the Wardens for any DA fans, my poor Wardens are feeling very under appreciated BTW so will be trying to get one chapter up for them a week and I'm sure they'd love reviews to ;)**_

_**2. I have discovered Star Trek: Voyager fiction, specifically Gemini1179's B/7 fics. Check out Gemini's ongoing one 'Research and Development' and challenge fic 'The Trials of Herculanna and Sevcules' I think they're awesome. Love your work Gemini!**_

_**Another shout out to Cambia Forma's 'Lo Ti Amero Sempre' a femShep/Miri oneshot at the moment that I'm eagerly awaiting more of!**_

_**Until next time! You can review now ;)  
><strong>_


	33. Recovery

Shepard smiled as she greeted the asari bar tender, same one as the other day when she'd come in with Gianna, "Atheyta."

"Shepard." The asari smirked, this human was not one to forget though she had a different companion today, "You have good taste." she winked after a quick glance of appreciation for the other human woman.

Miranda's brow rose a little at the insinuation.

"I have _great_ taste what're you talking about?" Shepard grinned and produced her credit chit, "Bottle of Ice Brandy thanks." she looked to Miranda who was giving her a look that silently was demanding an explanation. "What would you like?" she asked casually, she'd answer that silent question when they were seated.

"Just get two glasses." Miranda didn't actually mind the brandy and could feel the grin of approval and something else in Shepard.

Atheyta chuckled, "Coming right up hon."

"You do realize I'm converting you right? Before we're done with this mission you'll be ordering Ice Brandy for yourself." Shepard smiled, her eyes twinkling a little at the prospect.

"I'm sure Dr. Chakwas will be pleased she's had such an impact on the younger generation." Miranda smirked, knowing exactly where Shepard first acquired the taste.

Shepard laughed, "Oh she is, she just _grins_ at me every time I bring her a bottle and tells me 'these shots are the only acceptable ones I'll treat you for'."

Bottle and glasses in hand Shepard followed Miranda to the more private room towards the back.

Miranda pulled a chair out to sit down, before she could though Shepard slipped her arms around Miranda's waist and kissed her lightly on the neck, placing the bottle and glasses on the table so she could hold Miranda properly.

They stood there, out of sight of most of the clubs patrons, looking out at the Illium skyline for some time, neither talking. Shepard had wrapped her arms around Miranda's waist and was resting her chin on Miranda's shoulder. Miranda had one hand resting on Shepard's arms while the other reached up to lightly caress her warm, slightly scarred cheek. This time there was no overwhelming surge of emotions or sensations, only quiet, gentle comfort and reassurance.

It was eventually Shepard who spoke first, a soft, husky murmur that sent shivers down Miranda's spine, "Thank you for coming when you did."

Miranda smiled, turning her head a fraction to press her cheek against Shepard's. The warmth that was coming through their connection was tender and there was an endearing shyness to it, "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked softly. She'd thought it best not to remind Shepard that her armour was fitted with a camera so she'd seen most of what had transpired in that office, until it had been clear that Shepard was losing control.

Shepard closed her eyes and held her a bit tighter for a moment, then she kissed Miranda's cheek before letting her go.

Miranda sat down with her usual grace and poured two shots, sliding one over to where Shepard was moving to sit.

Shepard sat down facing the doorway and studied her drink for a moment. "I don't really know what to think. I mean one day she's accusing me of selling out to Cerberus the next she admits she's the one who _gave_ me to Cerberus in the first place." she looked up suddenly with a small scowl, "Why didn't you tell me yesterday?"

"It wasn't my place to tell you and was part of our agreement. She would tell you in her own time when she was ready." Miranda responded calmly, she made no comment concerning her 'selling out to Cerberus' as she knew perfectly well where Shepard stood on that front. Though that did remind her she needed to check on her contacts following up on her investigation into Shepard's claims regarding Cerberus.

"Fair enough." Shepard wasn't about to argue with that. Raising her glass she downed the shot with practiced ease and biotically pulled the bottle over to fill it up again without consciously thinking of her action.

Miranda raised her brow but said nothing, Shepard was distracted at the moment after all.

Just like on the Citadel after the Council meeting Shepard sat there deep in thought, not speaking at all, even her emotions were only rumbling softly through their connection but this close to each other it was a constant flow. Miranda felt a small amount of discomfort at being so intimately aware of what Shepard was feeling and cringed when Shepard looked to her sympathetically as she felt that discomfort in her.

Miranda considered Shepard closely. She'd been watching when Liara had accused her of seducing Shepard to keep her in line and the fierce way Shepard had responded to it had been heart warming, and surprising in its fury. "As I recall you and I have had some heated discussions and you didn't feel so close to losing control." she picked up her shot and sipped it.

Shepard downed her shot, her gaze taking in the Illium skyline through the window to her left as she considered what Miranda had just said. "After Torfan I was given time to recover which gave me the chance to centre myself and lock it away. I haven't been able to do that as well on the Normandy since unleashing it on Omega, then there was the Prothean thing yesterday..."

Understanding lit Miranda's blue eyes, "Which further reduced your mental control making you more vulnerable to provocation, especially from someone you care for."

Shepard turned her gaze back to Miranda and nodded, "I couldn't even feel your presence until you touched me and made me look at you. You didn't just calm me, you helped me find my centre." she smiled and decided that right now it wouldn't be wise to tell Miranda that she _was_ her centre, had been ever since they were girls and this darkness had first started to develop in her.

"Well I'm not going to be able to hold your hand every time you get angry. You need to strengthen your mental control." Miranda warned her, perhaps a little too _professional_ in tone.

Shepard scowled in irritation at being told something so blatantly that she obviously already knew, "It's not something I can do in a day or with all the interruptions on the ship."

"Would you prefer I booked you a room at Keluah for as long as you need?" Miranda offered a touch more softly this time, the mission was too dangerous for them _both_ to be at less than their best.

Shepard cocked her head with a gorgeous little smirk, her mind instantly wanting to respond 'only if you came with me' but she managed to reign in the words... just not the surge of desire that flickered through their connection as for a moment she began to picture helping Miranda out of that tight fitting uniform...

Miranda took a deep breath and nearly bit her lip to stop the gasp as the hot desire from Shepard stoked her own.

Shepard cleared her throat and shook her head clear of the images, "Wow, this is going to take some getting used to. Sorry about that." she mumbled, quickly downing her next shot to cool herself off.

"I've noticed our connection's been growing stronger the more we... use our biotics together." Miranda shared her observation cautiously.

"Maybe we won't have to be touching to speak mind to mind, isn't that a scary thought." Shepard grinned indicating that she didn't actually think it would be so bad.

"Could be useful but learning how to control it is going to be challenging." Miranda sipped from her brandy, watching as Shepard poured another shot.

"Yeah, very distracting knowing that you're gonna feel every time I'm _admiring _you." Shepard smiled sheepishly, finding her shot glass very interesting and unable to hide her embarrassment over the fact.

"Works both ways, I _admire_ you as well Steph." Miranda assured her with a seductive smile.

Shepard chuckled as she just _knew_ Miranda was smiling at her like that on purpose, "Ah so we agree this isn't embarrassing at all right?"

Miranda's seductive smile remained and she leaned forward enticingly, "Knowing that one of the most famous and talented women in the galaxy is greatly _distracted_ by me is certainly quite the ego boost."

Shepard laughed and flicked a little biotic push at her shoulder, just enough to feel like a light tap, "Famous, infamous kinda depends who you talk to. Besides, like you _need_ an ego boost and all, Miss I'm-perfection-personified."

Miranda might have been annoyed or not interested in such a comment about her being perfect if it wasn't for the charming smile and affection she could feel behind it.

"As for Keluah, save it for another time. Once we get Samara and Thane we'll be heading to Benkenstein for a certain party. It looked like a two day trip to get there if I remember right, if you can..." she stopped and frowned, "Wait we never got to talk about what _you_ need other than trying to meld with me." she kicked herself for forgetting that yesterday.

Miranda just shook her head, "It was quite the shock finding out what we did, it's fine." she dismissed Shepard's concern, "If Rana remains on the Normandy we can do what needs to be done there, it won't take more than an hour a day so I'll be able to ensure the crew doesn't disturb you."

"What exactly is it you have to do?" Shepard asked curiously, watching Miranda with great interest as this was something that would affect them both.

"Stimulate the neural pathways to connect properly. It's going to be a gradual process as anything too intense or done too quickly will initiate the defence mechanism. I could do it myself or under Dr. Chakwas supervision but Rana is the more experienced in neural stimulation. Considering how experimental this is it's prudent to have Rana administer the treatment." Miranda slid her glass towards Shepard indicating she'd like more.

Shepard poured with a nod, she would have been surprised that Miranda entrusted anything so important to anyone other than herself but she knew that Miranda was no fool and trying to do this by herself was just asking for something to go horribly wrong. "I wanted Rana to remain on board anyway. Anything she's got from what she studied on Virmire is essential, if we can find a way to _prevent_ indoctrination it could be the difference between kicking the Reapers arses or being Reaper fodder."

"Which means we'll need to purchase suitable equipment for her that will be able to fit into the lab as there's nowhere else to go." Miranda acknowledged, the lab would need to be re-outfitted appropriately to accommodate both Mordin and Rana's research.

Shepard threw back her fourth or was it fifth shot, she wasn't really paying attention, and hummed softly in satisfaction at the smooth tasting liquor, "Do you need my signature or can I just say go for it, you know what needs to be done." she grinned over at Miranda.

Miranda smirked, "You think I _need_ your signature?" she teased.

"Of course you do, I'm famous remember." Shepard beamed, batting her eyelashes cheekily.

Miranda actually laughed, "I think I can do better than just your _signature_, Stephanie." She winked and made Shepard blush at the heated desire that flowed through their connection clearly indicating what she had in mind for 'better'.

"You know you're gonna make me forget we're in a public place here Miranda." Shepard chided her with a smirk.

"Speaking of public place, you have _great_ taste?" Miranda continued to smile, more curious than concerned especially given what she could feel from Shepard.

"I was wondering when you were going to ask about that. Gianna Parasnni, Noveria Internal Affairs was on a job here, owed me a beer for helping her out on Noveria. Helped her out again by convincing an Asari she'd been investigating who'd stolen some prototype mods that I was an interested buyer." Shepard smirked, "It was actually a little fun, especially when Gianna turned up and the target went an all new shade of blue and ran away with her tail between her legs." She chuckled and shook her head, "And Gianna didn't even need a gun."

Miranda shook her head at the mirth Shepard was feeling over that little encounter though it did remind her that she needed to be keeping a closer eye on Shepard. Too much was at stake for a little side dalliance like that to interfere with their mission. She didn't quite concede to herself that there were _other_ reasons she wanted to keep a close eye on Shepard just yet, knowing she was attracted to the gorgeous marine and having that attraction influence her professionalism were two very different things and she was nothing if not a consummate professional.

"We really should get back to the Normandy, I've got to go over this data and have something to eat and I'm sure you had a lot of work you ran out on to keep me in line." Shepard sighed, feeling a little reluctant to go but knowing they didn't have time to just sit around like this, especially with a lead on one of their targets now in her hands.

Miranda hesitated in suggesting that they were already somewhere they could order food as she knew Shepard was right, they did need to get back to work. Finishing off her shot she rose to her feet as Shepard did. She was a little surprised as when she turned to lead the way out Shepard took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"Thanks for coming with me." Shepard smiled and kissed her cheek lightly before striding past the now smiling operative.

Having returned to the Normandy, Shepard was in the mess eating one of Gardner's latest creations and reading over the data Liara had given her. There was quite a bit of information concerning Samara that Ceberus could never have gotten their hands on. But there was far more than just a lead to follow, it turned out that Samara was hunting a dangerous individual, one the Asari feared even discussing out loud. An ardat yakshi. Liara had given her a great deal of data concerning the ardat yakshi and their abilities and Shepard was finding herself reluctant to interfere with Samara's quest.

An asari who when melding with another completely fried out their nervous system and was empowered by it like a drug... the thought of it just made Shepard shudder and think twice about melding with an asari, probably why they both feared and spoke very little of the condition.

A beep on her communicator interrupted her musings.

"Yeah?" she responded absently.

"Shep!" an overly cheerful Kasumi greeted the Commander.

It was then Shepard realized she hadn't seen either her or Garrus since she'd returned to the ship, "What's up Kasumi?"

"I _finally_ managed to get Garrus to try out a new set of armour, cos the set you gave him really has seen better days, but he's refusing to buy it! I need a little backup here! He's not gonna replace the old one cos _you_ bought it for him." She put on her best pouty voice.

Shepard chuckled, "Really? He's that attached to it?"

"Oh I'm sure he'll deny it to his dying breath if you ask him but it's true! Trust me!" Kasumi assured her enthusiastically.

"Well then I'll just have to buy him a new set won't I. Where are you?" she flicked off her omni-tool and rose to her feet.

"Here." Kasumi sent the coordinates to Shep.

Shepard glanced down as her only just switched off omni-tool flicked back to life and showed her where the pair were at. "On my way, just keep pestering him till I get there." She smirked, figuring Kasumi wouldn't have _any_ trouble with that.

Kasumi simply chuckled.

Shepard wondered if Garrus would be alright after spending so long with Kasumi... shopping.

By the time Shepard had found her way through the marketplace to the shop Garrus and Kasumi were at Kasumi had convinced Garrus to not only purchase the armour but some actual clothes as well. Shepard shook her head at the turian with a smirk, "You should see what she made _me_ buy."

Garrus started at the sound of her voice and whirled around with a sudden feeling of nakedness at not being in his armour before Shepard. His fringe flushed in embarrassment until she put her hand on his arm with a grin up at him.

"You look great Garrus. Always pays to have something to do some undercover recon in. Right Kasumi?" she looked to the little woman expectantly.

"I prefer a stealth net but that works to." She grinned, very pleased with her handi-work.

"I don't know, it's not... really my style." He frowned, looking down at himself in the blue and green suit.

"It looks great Garrus, you'll have all the ladies swooning you handsome thug." Shepard grinned and hit him lightly on the arm.

He chuckled, "I take it she convinced you to buy something that'd have the ladies _swooning_ as well?"

"I'm hoping one in particular." Shepard's smirk became a megawatt grin and her eyes sparkled.

"Oh you've _got_ to tell us how your date went!" Kasumi gushed, she hadn't been able to catch up with Shepard since last night.

"You went on a date and you didn't tell me?" Garrus crossed his arms in mock indignation.

"It was just drinks and it wasn't intended as a _date_. Look you really want to know let's buy this stuff, go get Samara then have a good old gossip session like a bunch of old ninnies back on the Normandy." Shepard sighed.

"Do I get to see your swooning suit?" Garrus growled but wasn't able to hide the gleam of mirth in his predatory blue eyes.

"My... seriously? Garrus how positively feminine of you!" Shepard smirked up at him.

Garrus growled in the back of his throat, "I am your best friend and wingman! I need to be certain that your attire will be suitable in your quest to secure your potential mate just as you have given your approval of mine."

Kasumi bit her lip to stop her giggle at the cute display.

"Oh believe me she'll _love it_ but I cannot deny my _wingman_ his right to approve my..." her eyes narrowed, "do you even _know_ what a human female finds attractive?"

At that he flustered a little, "I know in turians it's all about the fringe and the waist, it's not so for humans? Your... hair? I've noticed that some of your kind spend a lot of time grooming it..."

Kasumi couldn't hold it in any more, she burst out laughing, "Oh Garrus, you and I have much to discuss my friend!"

Shepard chuckled and shook her head, very surprised by this turn of events but she didn't blame him at all for wanting to take any excuse to spend time with her. They'd had very little time to just sit and chat since picking him up on Omega, sure they'd sparred but actual talking? Not so much. She most definitely had to rectify that if he was so eager for time with her that he wanted to ensure her _swooning suit_ was adequate.

"So where's this armour?" Shepard decided to rescue her floundering _wingman_.

Garrus looked relieved then sheepish, which was a strange look on a turian as he ducked his face a little and his mandibles clicked, "I hope you don't mind..."

"Don't mind? Garrus _armour_ is replaceable, _you _are not. The one I got you before has served you well but with the damage to the upper chest and neck plate it was only a matter of time before something got through. I'd much rather you get something new." She assured him with a nod. "How about I show you my dress you show me your armour, approve it for battle like a good wingman." She winked.

Garrus laughed and relief flooded him. He'd been worried she'd be upset with him, the armour had cost her a small fortune at a time she hadn't had many spare credits. She'd sacrificed to keep him safe and her sacrifice had saved his life many, many times, and not just the credits but her own blood time and time again. It had been a long and drawn out fight tracking down Saren, but they'd prevailed. They'd prevailed because of her, because she wasn't like the other Spectres at all. Sure she wasn't afraid to skirt the rules, to outright _break_ them if it was required but it was all for the greater good. Her calls never put innocent in danger if she could help it, she fought _for_ the people not in _spite_ of them. She had taught him so much that he didn't care if he looked a fool at times with the human female. She was his best friend, his _only_ friend. There was _nothing_ he wouldn't do for her and when she grinned up at him like that he no longer felt like a fool, or lost, or in despair. Stephanie Shepard gave him the most precious gift a friend could, hope.

* * *

><p><em><strong>After the last chap I felt some recovery was needed. I know I was exhausted!<strong>_

_**Up next Seph will be on her way to Samara and may just meet some old acquaintences along the way...**_

_**Oh and I've started up a link to my tumblr account for this story, little snapshots, bits of info you won't find here and stuff. There's not much there at the moment, a work in progress so if you're interested keep an eye on it: **_

_**bringerofdestruction[dot]tumblr[dot]com (replace the [dot]s with actual dots!)**_

_**Also if you're a DA fan, I've now got 2 stories on the go there, 'The Voice of the Wardens' set in DA: Origins, may cross over into Awakening, and 'Chosen' set in DA2 and will be linked to Voice so expect my worlds to look very different to the games!  
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_**Please review! I am such a review junkie! They totally make my day so if you get excited about alerts for my story please drop me a review, even a quickie! I'm not too fussy! XD**_

_**Thanks for reading! XD  
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	34. Unleashed

_**Sincere apologies for not updating sooner. I have a really good reason why my muse has fallen apart.**_

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><p>Shepard had an uneasy flicker in her stomach as she and Garrus headed towards the police station that was supposed to be keeping track of Samara. She didn't know if it was from the prospect of meeting the Justicar or not but it was damn distracting. Glancing at the turian beside her she smirked at the new armour, "Really does look good there Garrus, might need to brandish a shotgun to keep the ladies off you."<p>

Garrus snorted, "Ladies have a thing for scars."

Shepard grinned but it was only momentary as she thought of a particular lady who did not have a thing for scars, "Well then maybe I better not worry about the shotgun... I'll bring out the Cain we might _both_ need the protection."

Garrus actually laughed which was a really good feeling, something he hadn't done much of in the last couple years. What made her statement even more amusing was the number of asari checking Shepard out in their rather overt way that made it blatantly obvious they were _intrigued_ by the human female striding beside him.

They were heading through the markets when a scent hit Shepard from out of nowhere. She came to an instant halt, her nostrils flaring as she drank in the whisper of a trail, her pupils dilating making everything looked sharper and more focussed, her brain was categorizing the beings she could see into threats or non-threats, their aura's shining a little even though she wasn't using her biotic vision. Turning to trace that scent her senses honed in on a human male who'd just passed them, a man who'd made a point of not looking at her unlike the rest of the people around her. There was something about his aura...

Garrus looked back at Shepard when he realized she wasn't beside him anymore to see her going back in the direction they'd come, "Shepard?"

Shepard was too focussed on the man, on her prey, her thoughts were taken over by instinct and she followed him, slipping into the crowd and seeming to just disappear.

Garrus tried to follow but even his height and predatory senses couldn't see her, "Shepard what are you doing?" he called her comms.

No response.

Now he was starting to get a little concerned, "What's going on Shepard? Talk to me." He demanded, an unsettling feeling writhing in his gut as he looked around and could see no threat but no Shepard either. "EDI can you locate Shepard and keep track of her?"

"_She is currently heading south of the marketplace, I'm sending tracking data to your omni-tool._" EDI responded promptly.

Garrus checked his omni-tool and sure enough a map appeared showing a blip moving quickly away from him. He began to follow quickly, "Is there any indication that something is wrong with her communicator?"

"_It is functioning optimally._"

"Is there anything abnormal in any of her other readings?" He knew that Cerberus had installed medical analysis software into Shepard's armour to be able to monitor her vitals.

There was a pause.

"_Adrenaline has spiked and core temperature has risen, however, the medical analysis system is not equipped for a full medical scan. Is there a problem Garrus?"_ EDI sounded concerned.

"I don't know. One minute we're talking, the next she's gone and isn't responding to her comms. If there was trouble she would've warned me and this is not the kind of prank Shepard would pull for a joke." Garrus muttered, moving quickly to catch up with her without wanting to arouse curious glances or suspicions from the crowded marketplace.

"_Should I inform Operative Lawson?_"

Garrus thought for a second, if anyone could get through to Shepard it would be Miranda, "Yes."

"_Steph, where are you? What's going on?_" Miranda's voice came through her piece and Shepard came to a stop as memories surged.

_That scent. She couldn't get it out of her senses. Her mind was shifting and she could FEEL it. Her heart was pounding so hard it hurt. She was hot, so hot the sweat was beading on her face and pouring down her back. EVERYTHING was assaulting her senses. The breeze cool on her skin. The sounds; peoples footsteps, their voices, their breathing, those nearby she could practically feel their hearts pounding in her ears, then there was the traffic, the sounds of the busy harbour city of Sydney. It was all so loud but it wasn't a wall of sound, no, she could hear and identify everything individually. Her vision was changing, crisper, clearer, focussed, brighter and strange glows began to form around people. She could smell the sweat, the colognes, the perfumes, the ocean, the foods but they all took secondary place to that one scent, that scent that had captured her body and mind, that was dragging her through the street, that she instinctually NEEDED to find!_

_She cringed as her communicator rang in her ear, it was Miri's personal code and it reached into her subconscious. Miri. Miri's calling. Miri. She came to a dead halt, "Miri..."_

_"Seph?" Miri was worried. "Where are you? What's going on? Father's just boosted my security and you're not here."_

_Persephone blinked and looked around as she realized she didn't know where she was, Miri's voice pulling her senses back, "I... I don't know." Her breathing was ragged and she was confused. "I can't... I don't remember..." Now she was starting to panic. That scent wafted through her senses again and she groaned, "Miri..."_

_"Stay where you are, I'll have..." Miri stopped suddenly and Seph could hear shouting through the line. "Damnit!"_

_Then there were shots being fired. _

_Miri was in danger._

_This ignited something in Seph she couldn't remember feeling before. A primal rage that pushed aside whatever this scent was coursed through her and once again instinct took over. "I'm coming Miri." was all she said before she turned and sprinted._

"_Come on Steph, talk to me, what's going on?_" Miranda's matured voice broke into the memories and scent.

"Please tell me you're on the Normandy." Shepard trembled, sweating and heart racing just like so long ago.

"_I'm at the lab cleaning up the files..."_

"Shit! Jacob and Kasumi?" She began to panic, her mind not yet fully freed of the memory with that scent lingering in the air.

"_On the ship, Steph what is it?"_ Miranda's voice was insistent now.

"Last time this happened to me you were attacked. Someone..." The realization that dawned on her was like a sucker punch to her abdomen, "Holy _shit no!" _she sagged against the wall to her left. "EDI hack into the security net of the lab complex Miranda's in."

"_Shepard I must remind you this is a Cerberus facility."_

"So was Lazarus and those bastards got to Miranda there! Now just _DO IT!"_ Shepard ordered fiercely, clenching her fists and fighting to stay upright.

"_As you command. Hacking security systems._"

Upon hearing that and the _panic_ in Shepard, Mirandawas already doing what she could to speed up the data transfers and deleting files. Whoever these people were they couldn't get their hands on the new data concerning Shepard and herself.

"_There is a squad of six armed personnel heading towards Miranda's location._" EDI informed them.

"_I can handle six fools."_ Miranda assured Shepard quickly.

"Just like you did on Lazarus?" Shepard countered softly.

Miranda stilled, whatever they'd done on Lazarus they'd been able to pose as legitimate operatives and had been able to wipe her memory of it.

"I'm coming Miri. EDI slow them down." Shepard growled, instinct kicking in, pure, powerful and possessive instinct. Unleashing her biotics she _rushed_ in a sustained biotic surge that matriarchs would be envious of.

Garrus was nearly bowled over by the surging biotic fury and barely got enough of a look to determine it was Shepard, "Whoa! Shepard!"

"_Garrus, I recommend proceeding to the lab as quickly as possible. Operative Lawson is about to come under hostile fire."_ EDI advised the confused turian.

That made sense. "I'm on it." He went into Archangel mode and took off after Shepard.

Miranda whirled around, biotics flaring as the door behind her opened and a research associate sauntered in with a confident smirk across his face.

"Operative Lawson." He greeted her in an amused tone.

"And who are you?" Miranda demanded, her entire being on high alert as she sensed this man was trouble.

"Oh that's right, we lowly associates are not worthy of the attentions of the Illusive Man's right hand woman." He sneered and put his hand over his heart, "_Pliar Nochli._" He beamed at her.

Miranda's biotics instantly vanished and she felt a wave of sudden and inexplicable exhaustion wash through her, her eyelids so heavy she struggled to keep them open. She grunted and fought with everything she had to stay awake knowing that if she fell it was all over, Shepard was still too far away to be able to do anything.

"Isn't the human brain an amazing thing. A biological machine that can be programmed for so many things. Especially dear little Persephone's, she took to the programme oh so well and look at her now!" He crowed in triumph as she swayed on her feet, admiring the fight she put up.

At the mention of Persephone, Miranda found something within her strengthened, "What did you _do_ to Persephone? Where is she?"

He grinned, "Why don't you ask _Shepard_, oh wait, you won't remember this. _Pliar Nochli!_"

Miranda tried to use her biotics to stop him before he could say it but she couldn't summon the energy and fell like a stone, unable to fight whatever conditioning they'd put in her brain.

The power went out leaving them in the dim light that filtered in through the windows.

With a frown the associate tapped his communicator, "Security team what seems to be the problem?"

There was no response. Whatever had cut the power had cut the comms as well.

"Well we'd better get a move on then." Striding over to the fallen woman he rolled her onto her back and slid a slim head band around her forehead and activated it. The holographic interface flashed over Miranda's face and he began his work.

"_Shepard, Miranda has been compromised and is unconscious. A human male posing as one of the research associates is currently attempting to re-write a sequence into her brain._" EDI informed Shepard quickly.

Shepard snarled and pushed herself harder, faster until it felt as though the entire world had slowed down around her. Her rage at the knowledge that Miranda was being violated unleashed the wild beast within her to a far greater extent than she had ever felt before.

Seeing the speed Shepard had reached EDI did her best to clear the path before her, opening doors, closing off others, altering traffic flow seamlessly and breaking many laws concerning AI's in the process. However, she had been commanded by Shepard to assist in whatever capacity possible.

Shepard burst through the lower levels of the facility and didn't bother with the elevators, she took straight to the stairs. Bounding up them she burst through the opening emergency door and all she could see was red. Snarling she threw herself at the first figure. She couldn't tell if it was male or female; human, turian or asari; military or civilian. It's aura was red. Red meant kill. So kill she did.

Gunfire tore through the air but bounced harmlessly off the biotics shield.

Screams reverberated through the halls but no alarms were activated. All the security systems were down.

There was one last red being between her and the door that led to Miri. It was frantically backing up, trying to get away from her but there was no escape.

Shepard leapt clear over the console the figure was trying to hide behind and snarled as she punched her hand through his chest with biotically empowered force that thrust out the back of his chest with an explosive spray of blood, lung and heart matter. She didn't even notice the terror in his eyes as she pulled back her arm and he fell to the floor lifeless.

When the gunfire and screams had first started the handler had locked both doors, he needed time, this was an incredibly delicate procedure and would take more than ten minutes to complete. With the doors locked he felt safe enough for now. Communications were still down though so he couldn't call for reinforcements. All he had to do was remain calm then slip out the back once his task was done. Persephone had been drawn away in the opposite direction so he didn't have to worry about her. He smirked, that was something he could tick off, she still responded to the pheromones as expected. He figured that it was just the crew of the Normandy coming, they could be dealt with.

The main door suddenly swished open.

He looked up startled. Then all the blood drained from his face.

In strode the very being who was to be feared above all. Her face twisted by an animalistic snarl, her eyes and scars blazing red, her biotics raging around her like a purple tempest, blood dripping from her face and hands. Here was the culmination of their work. The ultimate predator. And she was here. Stalking _him_.

If she was able to get her hands on the Kirohan Device she'd be able to undo everything. All their carefully laid plans would be for naught. He knew he was a dead man. But this was one last thing he could do.

He moved quickly.

So did Shepard.

He got his hand to the device and ripped it from Miranda's head, crushing the main circuitry just as a powerful force threw him back with bone crunching force into the wall. In the blink of an eye she was on him.

Shepard slammed her fist into his chest, but instead of punching through she ripped out his heart.

He coughed up blood, looking down at the lump of flesh in her hand, his vision fading as she tossed it aside.

With a snarl she proceeded to tear him limb from limb. This was the one who'd hurt Miri. She had no control. The beast had taken over. Right now there was nothing of Persephone conscious.

EDI was trying to reach Commander but Shepard wasn't responding. There was something clearly wrong with Shepard. So she tried a different approach. She altered her voice to match Miranda's, "_Stephanie that is enough."_ EDI commanded with the same authority Miranda would.

Shepard stopped.

"_I need your help Stephanie, please turn around."_ EDI was quite pleased when Shepard did so.

Shepard was gasping for breath but at Miranda's voice her senses were returning, slowly but surely. Her eyes focussed on Miranda laying motionless on the ground and her heart skipped a beat, "Miri!"

Kneeling beside her she reached out to lightly shake Miranda and saw the state of her hands. A coil of steel razors tightened around her heart and stomach, "Oh goddess what did I do?" she gasped, horrified as she couldn't _remember_. On Torfan she'd been in control still.

"_Shepard, the data from Rana indicates that you and Operative Lawson can meld your minds. I conclude that doing so will aid in reviving her._" EDI's normal voice came through to her.

"Right." Shepard swallowed. She'd been loath to do this, and especially now that her mind was so ravaged but if it was the only way...

Pulling off her gloves she lay down beside Miri and pressed her forehead against Miranda's, tenderly holding Miri's face in her hands. Taking a few deep breaths she forced herself to calm, to reach into Miri who felt so empty right now. As careful as she could possibly be she let her love flow into Miranda and used it as a bridge between them.

With no real idea if what she was doing was right Shepard felt her consciousness lightly brush against Miranda's. Miranda's was so still. Tentatively she nudged again and this time she caressed that normally brilliant mind.

'_Miri you need to wake up beautiful.'_ She whispered, feeling her words and emotions swirling around Miranda's mind. Subconsciously she was too scared to actually delve into her, to truly meld. The beast within her was too strong, too close to the surface and the thought of tainting Miranda was to terrifying for her to consciously go deeper than this.

'_Come on darling, I'm here, I'm right here, come back to me.'_ She pleaded with Miranda desperately.

Garrus slowed at the carnage Shepard had left in her wake. Throats had been mangled, chests had massive holes in them, heads had been twisted to impossible angles, blood spattered the walls like something out of a horror vid. This was the work of the Butcher of Torfan. Swallowing nervously he made his way through the level, thanking the spirits this was the only floor Shepard had been on, had unleashed her fury upon.

When he found them he felt sick. There had been another human in the room. One that was now beyond any form of recognition beyond genetic.

Shepard was laying over Miranda, their faces pressed together and she was murmuring, begging Miranda to wake up. Her normally brown hair was black and had fallen loose from its tie, now in unruly clumps and dripping red down Miranda's face and neck. Her hands seemed paler than usual having been covered by the gloves but now becoming stained with the drips from her hair.

Garrus had no idea what to do. Was Shepard even stable right now? This was _nothing_ like the Commander he knew and respected.

Shepard groaned, the gentle approach wasn't working, "Miranda Claire Lawson you wake up right now or so help me I'll kick your arse if my name isn't Persephone Eve Calleyuss!"

Garrus started, Shepard's name _wasn't_ Stephanie Shepard? What in the spirits was going on here!

Miranda jerked awake with a startled gasp.

"Oh thank the goddess, I thought I'd lost you." Shepard sobbed and kissed Miranda deeply. That was until Miranda shoved her off.

"What do you think you're doing?" Miranda exclaimed, the metallic taste of blood filling her senses. She looked up at Shepard in shock at her audacity to have kissed her like that then shock turned to horror at how blood covered she was.

Shepard sat up, confused by the emotions she was feeling from Miranda, "Well saving your mind from the people who messed up your memory pathways, that doesn't deserve a kiss?"

"Why on _earth_ would I want to kiss _you, Commander?_" Miranda just about spat, trying to wipe the blood from her face that was feeling sticky and revolting with the sleeve of her shirt.

"What? You were quite happy kissing me at lunch..." Shepard's voice trailed off at the gut wrenching shock and surprise that rippled through Miranda and her own realization, "Oh goddess, what day is it?"

Miranda went to check her omni-tool.

Shepard reached out and stopped her, "What _day is it?"_

Miranda thought for a moment, "Tuesday, sixteenth of march."

Garrus wasn't up to date with human time keeping so looked to Shepard for a response.

"Oh no fucking way..." Shepard sat back on her heels, utterly deflated, her heart crushing at what that meant.

Miranda hissed and clutched at her chest, "What's going on? What's wrong with me?"

Shepard couldn't speak, but she was about to empty her stomach. Clumsily getting to her feet she staggered away to hurl behind the console.

"Shepard!" Garrus rushed over to her filled with worry and confusion.

Shepard cried out at the pain in her chest.

Miranda groaned and collapsed back to the ground at the hot bands constricting her heart.

"There was a... a band on her head... he pulled it off... find it." Shepard forced out.

Garrus nodded, "Right, a band." Immediately he went to search for it.

Shepard knew she had to calm down, she was hurting Miranda she could feel it.

The pain in her chest slowly eased and Miranda looked over to where Shepard was kneeling, hand over her head, head bowed, breathing ragged. Shepard shouldn't be awake yet, she wasn't finished! She wasn't... looking around Miranda realized they were _not_ on Lazarus station. Quickly activating her omni-tool she checked the date.

April twenty-third.

Miranda was seeing the date but finding it hard to process. She had lost _five weeks_ of her memories? In the last five weeks Shepard had woken and they'd... they'd become romantically involved? How in the stars had _that_ happened?

Garrus found the pieces of the device and clenched his mandibles. It was useless. "Uh, Shepard."

Shepard turned to see the pieces in his talons. Red rage crossed her vision and she surged to her feet, "_NO! That fucking bastard!"_ She roared.

Miranda stared for only a moment as Shepard attacked the hunk of flesh that had once been human with unbridled rage. Then she was on her feet, "Shepard!" She rushed over to her, grabbing the marine by the shoulders and pulling her away.

Garrus stayed right back, but was ready to enter the fray should Shepard need to be restrained, it would kill Shepard even more if she ended up hurting Miranda.

"Don't you get it! These people have taken you away from me _TWICE!_ They fucked up your brain so bad if I tell you who I really am you'll die!" Shepard yelled, catching her balance quickly.

Miranda jerked back.

"You _THINK_ you know everything there is to know about me but you're _WRONG!_ You know what they've _LET YOU KNOW!"_ She gestured towards the mutilated body furiously.

Miranda swallowed the bile that was rising in the back of her throat, "And who are _they_?"

"I have no fucking clue. But they're the ones who created this." she held up her bloodied arms, "They fucking _trained_ me to be a beast, an animal when the right triggers are met. _YOU_ being in danger is a trigger. One I don't think they anticipated otherwise they wouldn't be working so hard to erase us." With a cry of rage she lashed out with her biotics and threw the console that Rana had been using yesterday.

"Shepard you need to calm down." Miranda tried to soothe her.

"_CALM DOWN!_ _YOU _are my calm! _YOU_ are my centre! You always have been! Whenever I've lost myself it's memories of _YOU_ that bring me back!" The biotics were rolling off Shepard in her rage and she was beyond dangerous levels now.

Miranda thought quickly, she had to act, if she couldn't calm Shepard, Shepard would kill them all. Closing the distance between them she reached her hand around Shepard's head and brought her in close and hard, kissing her fiercely to try and break through that rage.

It took a moment for Shepard to register that Miranda was kissing her. Then with a sob she clung to Miranda and returned the kiss with a gentle tenderness that had Miranda softening in response.

There was something about the way Shepard was kissing her, those soft lips that were trembling beneath hers, the way Shepard held her so dearly, that had Miranda's heart starting to beat to a different tune. The surging of emotions that were drowning her began to change. The anger and hate melting away into passion and... oh god Shepard _loved _her! As that love reached into her she could feel such depth beneath its waves that explained why Shepard had reacted so violently.

Shepard didn't resist this time when she felt her mind reaching for Miranda's.

Garrus had long since backed out of the room and now stood guard. Wingman he might be but the way those two had started kissing... he wouldn't be surprised if they ended up ripping off the armour and clothes from each other.

Miranda had no idea what this sensation was but it was incredible!

'_I don't know how to help you beyond this. I love you. I've waited for you for so long, I'll wait for you a little longer.'_ Shepard whispered into Miranda's mind.

Miranda gasped but Shepard wouldn't release her, wouldn't let her pull back. There was a presence in her mind, a presence too great, powerful and _alien _it was overwhelming but it was being so gentle with her, caressing, soothing, loving. It was Shepard. Shepard was _melding_ with her. It was breathtaking. _She_ was breathtaking.

Shepard felt Miranda melt against her, _into_ her and she stood strong, holding Miranda steady, keeping her strong. This wasn't about giving in to desires. She wanted to restore Miranda's mind. Rana had said melding would help. EDI had said it would help. No idea how to meld she simply soothed Miranda and in doing so found that she herself was also soothed.

Neither of them realized how long they'd been standing their locked in each other's embrace. When they finally pulled back, gasping for breath they sought each other's eyes, Miranda for an explanation about what had just happened, Shepard to see if Miranda remembered. From the look of awe and wonder in Miranda's eyes and the uncertainty she could feel in her Miranda hadn't remembered.

"Lazarus station was destroyed, Wilson was a mole and turned the mechs against the station personnel. You had to wake me prematurely, hence the scarring," she reached up and touched her cheek.

Under all the blood it had been hard to see but now Miranda could and she grimaced at the thought that all that time and Shepard wasn't perfect like intended.

"Jacob, you and I were the only ones to make it off alive. We hit dirt right away, Freedom's Progress was abducted and there we found it the ones responsible are the Collectors." Shepard bit her lip a little at the surprise and shock within Miranda at that revelation. "We've been gathering specialists for my squad since then. Garrus Vakarian, Mordin Solus, Kasumi Goto, Zaeed Massani, Jack and Grunt so far. We're here on Illium for Justicar Samara and an assassin called Thane Krios as well as to study our biotics, the connection between us and how to undo what has been done to your mind. But it seems that your mind is not the only one that has been manipulated." She looked to the body of the scientist and shuddered. "Rana Thanoptis might have some ideas, she's been working with you to fix this."

Miranda felt sick to the stomach, violated. That someone had been able to do this, to take her memories so completely that none of what Shepard was saying was familiar. However, words aside, what she was _feeling_ with Shepard, this connection, while wild and intense, felt right, _Shepard_ felt right. Hesitantly she reached up and cupped Shepard's face.

Shepard swallowed and stopped speaking, her eyes returning to Miranda's.

"How is it possible that I can feel you like this?" Miranda breathed as the connection intensified at her touch and she waivered on her feet.

Shepard gently took hold of her hips to steady her, "I don't know. I truly don't know. We... share some common anomalies but Rana hasn't found an explanation for them yet. Perhaps we should clean up and talk more on the Normandy."

"I'll contact the Illusive Man, he'll arrange for a Cerberus cleanup crew to handle... this." Miranda nodded towards the brutalized body.

Shepard swallowed and grimaced, how had Miranda been able to kiss her when all she could taste was blood and bile and it was enough to make her stomach churn again. "Tell him he has the fucking _worst_ security if not even his top operative is safe in his own facilities. Oh and you haven't told him about us or that we've been studying our brains to figure out how to fix your neural pathways. You know he'll pull you from this mission if he knew everything." she growled then turned and left.

Miranda took a deep breath as the storm of emotions calmed with Shepard leaving. Shepard was probably right about being pulled from the mission, but was it required? The mission was all that was important, if she compromised it with whatever this was with Shepard... But Shepard had said that she was her calm, her centre. Would Shepard be able to complete the mission without her if that was true? While the thought of being so vital to the mission was a boost to the ego, what it meant was daunting. She had to clean up before calling the Illusive Man anyway, it would give her some time to think.

"_Operative Lawson, I am EDI, the Normandy's artificial intelligence._" EDI introduced herself, she had of course seen everything that had happened.

Miranda was a little startled, "Yes EDI?"

"_I have locked down the level you are currently on, however local law enforcement is on its way."_ She advised both Shepard and Lawson.

"Good work," Shepard spoke before Miranda could, "Garrus hold them off saying this is a SPECTRE investigation."

Miranda blinked as a memory of being on the Citadel with Shepard flashed through her mind. They were sitting in a lounge having drinks after Shepard had just been reinstated into the SPECTRE's. Shaking her head she remembered the feeling of warmth that had come not from the brandy but from seeing Shepard smile at her, a feeling she'd quashed at the time but for some reason stood out right now. That warmth led her mind to Omega, the playful banter between her and Shepard...

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><p><em><strong>I have donned a fictional heavily padded sumo suit and now await your reviews... ;)<strong>_

_**Oh and this chap was totally influenced by 30 Seconds to Mars - Hurricane, just in case you're interested in knowing. ;)  
><strong>_

_**Also**_ _**big thanks to those who were brave enough to review To sei il mio tutto. I call nerves on posting such a provocative piece but given the number of hits and the kind reviews I didn't do to bad. All for you Cambia Forma! Glad you're enjoying it to ;) Hmmm what to do with Seph and Miri...**_

_**Oh and more snippets on my BoD tumblr!**_


	35. Aftermath of the Beast

The hot water ran over her body, turning red as it washed away the blood but she was numb to it. Leaning against the tiles with her forehead and hands hanging limply by her sides she just stood there in a daze. She could handle this. She was Commander Fucking Shepard. She'd won Miri's heart twice, she could do it again. She'd help Miri get her memories back or else just create new ones with her...

But then there was the whole losing control thing on top of that. What had she done? What the _fuck _had happened to her? It was all a haze of rage and red and the scent of blood and the desperation to get to Miri. She couldn't _remember_ anything else! So much blood. The smell of it even now was invading her senses, clogging her pores and making her feel sick but it also stirred up that _thing_ inside her.

She'd been too late. Fallen for that trap with the scent _again_ and been taken too far away from Miri to get there in time. Five weeks, _five weeks_ Miri had lost because she'd been distracted, because this _beast _inside her had picked up that fucking scent and she'd lost control of herself. Goddess what was she? What had they done to her? Had any of those people she'd torn apart just been innocent workers in the wrong place at the wrong time?

Commander Fucking Shepard? Who the fuck was she kidding, this hurt like hell! It was tearing her up inside in so many ways she couldn't think straight. Her shoulder's began to shake with sobs that wracked her whole body. Her knees going weak but she remained standing, putting her hands to the wall to keep upright, her fists tightly clenched. It felt like she was burning up even when she adjusted the water temp for cool water to wash over her.

Everything was so fucked up. How had this happened? Who _were_ these people? What could they possibly _gain_ by making her into an uncontrollable monster?

Miranda bit her lip at the intense heart ache that was emanating from that central shower cubicle. Washing the blood from her face and fixing her hair she stopped, head bowed at the wave of despair that crashed through her from Shepard.

Scattered memories had begun returning, whether it was due to the intense kiss or not she wasn't sure. All of her memories involved Shepard... Stephanie, in some way. In some they were arguing so heatedly she'd been a touch afraid Shepard would actually harm her. In others all she wanted to do was kiss Stephanie. It just didn't make any sense to her right now.

Logically she understood what had happened. She knew exactly where she was, Celonia Labs on Illium, a Cerberus facility studying biotics. Commander Shepard was clearly awake and fully restored, apart from the facial scarring. The Normandy was finished and it's AI functioning quite well apparently. Logically that meant she had lost memories of how she'd arrived at this location and point in time. But logic was _not_ any consolation, especially when she was remembering snippets out of context that made little sense.

Then there was how she'd woken. The strange sensation of another mind actually _touching_ hers. She couldn't remember what was said but she'd felt warmth, fear, anger, love, desperation all intermingled and pulling at her, dragging her mind back from the darkness. When she had finally started coming around lips had been on hers, kissing her with passionate relief she'd been able to _feel_ through this strange connection, tasting heavily of metallic blood.

Of course her first response had been to push the assailant away.

When she'd opened her eyes and found herself looking up at Shepard she'd been shocked, _more_ than shocked at seeing her awake and beside her looking so confused. And the blood... it had been _dripping_ from her she was so drenched in it. It had been... horrific to say the least. She shuddered at the memory of Shepard's rage when they'd discovered the memory loss. The way she'd mutilated that body... this was Commander Shepard, the Butcher of Torfan. All her research and she'd never actually thought about what that title actually meant beyond she killed a group of Batarians in anger. Shepard had lost control... until she'd kissed her.

Miranda clenched her fists, head bowed as she remembered that kiss. She'd expected that Shepard's response to being kissed would be hard, fierce to match the violence she'd just been exhibiting and had been prepared for it. But that hadn't been the case. Shepard had stilled, calmed, responded so gently to her as though the concern of hurting her, of being rough with her was so burned into her subconscious mind that Shepard's... Stephanie's... instinctive response to her was to pull back that violent nature. Whatever it was that Shepard wrestled with it either shrank back or Shepard managed to gain control over it when she was near... no not just near, when she was _touching_ her. That physical contact was what had reached through to her. Shepard had _trembled_ at her touch, her kiss. She had _not_ been prepared for that.

Miranda bit her lip and leaned heavily against the sink. That kiss. She'd never experienced _anything_ remotely like it before. She'd never joined with an Asari but if she could describe it, she would liken what they'd just shared to something akin to what she understood a joining to be. But that was _impossible_. Human's _couldn't meld._

Miranda groaned as a memory surged, her hand going to her face quickly. An asari was speaking to them, to her and Stephanie,

"_I had thought that the Prothean techniques would align with the neural anomaly, that the anomaly was in fact the Cipher itself. But the anomaly is here_. _The anomaly only became active when you two began melding_... _It's only basic at the moment, like a child reaching out to another for the first time. But with time and practice I firmly believe, given this data, that you two will be able to fully meld and join your minds should you so choose."_

She gasped and looked up suddenly at her reflection. She could _meld_ with Stephanie! Is _that_ what this connection was? Her shocked gaze flicked to the reflection of the cubicle door Stephanie was currently showering in.

The raging inferno behind her was becoming increasingly unstable and she could feel it more clearly than any other biotics she'd ever been in contact with. The anger, the confusion, the fear and horror of herself was tearing Shepard apart. Shepard... Stephanie loved her, she knew that, she'd _felt_ that. Had she started loving Stephanie?

The thought was put on hold as her biotics began to quiver, Stephanie was so emotionally unstable right now she was flaring. An unstable biotic was highly dangerous. It pushed her into action as two things were made clear to her, she actually _did _care deeply for Stephanie and right now Stephanie was broken and needed her.

Shepard shivered at the cool breeze that indicated someone had opened the door to the cubicle. She could feel that, that someone was Miranda. "You know we agreed that if you came in on me in the bathroom again you'd abide by the same dress code." Her voice cracked a little with all the emotions that were ripping through her.

Miranda paused as that memory played through her mind and she smiled, "Another time perhaps." Seeing that the water was running clear over Shepard's body, her gorgeous, tightly clenched body that was surrounded by a stormy mist of purple biotics, she picked up the towel and turned off the water.

Shepard bit her lip and clenched her eyes shut when she felt the towel wrap around her, Miranda's arms encircling her, the woman she loved gently pressed against her back.

The scent of Shepard, somehow still a little metallic and heavily laden with the ozone of her biotics, filled Miranda's senses as much as her aching emotional state did. Her own biotics couldn't help but respond to touching Shepard's and it took her breath away as the energy crackled between them. There were flashes sweeping through her mind of pressing up against Stephanie and kissing her somewhere... it looked like the lab when they were doing the testing. She gasped at the memories of them using their biotics in tandem, the way it had felt, how _Stephanie_ had felt, the power they shared, the intensity of their proximity, the overwhelming desire to pin Stephanie to the wall when they'd been kissing but had been rudely interrupted.

Shepard moaned at the merging of their biotics as Miranda's reached into hers. It was incredible, a caress so intimate it made her tremble. Yet she managed to still at what she could feel coming from Miranda, at first it was a strange mix of feelings but it was becoming increasingly passionate and set her heart racing.

Slowly Miranda pulled back a little and turned Stephanie by the shoulders. Stephanie was feeling so hot right now, like molten lava bursting from a volcano, she could just about smell the fire within her. In her mind's eye she could almost imagine her hands burning at the touch of Shepard but for some reason she didn't.

Shepard looked up at Miranda, trying valiantly to mute her pain, but it was so hard looking up into those cobalt blue eyes that were... so alive and captivating right now. She felt so utterly vulnerable not only under their piercing gaze but at how Miranda's biotics were sinking into her, _syncing_ with hers. Her touch was cooling her, _containing_ her and she willingly complied.

Miranda drank in the sight of the Stephanie's glistening face tilted to look up at her, the scars on her cheek had become an angry red from earlier and stood out starkly against her lightly tanned skin. Almost absently she reached up and ran her fingertips over them, "You've aggravated your scars." she murmured.

Shepard's heart was beating faster now, her eyes a little wider at the comment then she frowned and turned away, biting her lip from saying anything. She knew full well what Miranda thought about scars and pulled the towel around her tighter.

Miranda frowned at the pain that comment caused. Gently she tucked Stephanie's wet hair behind her ear and leaned in to lightly brush her lips over the scars, running her fingertips through the dripping wet hair that was so much darker than the normal chocolate she was used to seeing.

Shepard was quivering, taking a sharp breath at the ghost of a kiss, she closed her eyes as Miranda took that as encouragement and pressed closer. She almost dropped the towel in surprise as she felt a hot, soft tongue slowly begin to trace the jagged tears in her face. Heated shocks of desire sparked through her and her knees suddenly felt like jelly.

A pain filled voice was suddenly yelling at Miranda in her mind,

"_They where my life's story etched into my flesh, they were reminders of what I've sacrificed, what I've lost, what I've __given__ in the line of duty and to protect others. They were a part of who I am, of my self-identity, of what makes me, __me._ _And you __opted__ to __remove__ them. Why didn't you just give me blue eyes or blonde hair or tanned skin or a fucking __nose job__?_ _Because you were ordered to bring me back as __me__! __EXACTLY__ as I was! These where __my LIFE__, my life you just __erased__ to make me look pretty_."

The memory was vivid and so real she found it hard to distinguish reality from her memory.

"Stephanie, I'm so sorry, I had no idea they were so important to you." She whispered, her lips barely straying from the scarred cheek.

Shepard took a deep, shaky breath. It was almost exactly what Miranda had said the day she'd discovered Miranda had removed her scars. Only this time she'd used her first name, Miranda had only begun using that recently and in intimate situations when she was wanting to be personal and not professional.

Miranda had entered into Stephanie's personal space with the intent of helping her through the heartache she was feeling and to calm the biotic flaring, but now, in close proximity with the woman, her memories seemed to be surging forward, at least memories that involved Stephanie Shepard. Not wanting to relinquish that she turned Stephanie's face, tilted her chin back and kissed her lips hungrily, a touch of desperation edging through both her emotions and her body.

Shepard could feel it, could feel all of it including the snippets of memory being restored and she moaned, reaching up to pull Miranda closer, forgetting about the towel and barely aware of it falling to the ground as Miranda was pushing her back against the cold tiles. She'd vowed she'd do whatever it took to help Miranda and if kissing her until each and every memory had been restored was what it took she was _not_ going to complain!

Miranda sensed her willingness and for a moment remembered what her original intent had been and felt a touch guilty that it had turned to this... until Stephanie's hands began to roam over her body and the woman in her embrace seemed to open up to her in a way she'd never imagined possible. The physical world seemed to melt away as she felt Stephanie reaching out to her not on a physical level but something so much deeper. Whatever this was, it was emotional yes but intermingled with sensations, cutting pain was soothed by tender warmth, flashes of memories flowed through their minds in a tumultuous exchange where she couldn't tell what belonged to whom. It was all she could do just to _feel_ and she found herself swept up in it.

XXX

Garrus was ready and waiting for local law enforcement but was pleased to see the ground crew from the Normandy arrive first.

"What's going on Garrus? EDI said to get here ASAP." Jacob looked to the turian for an explanation, wondering why the turian was waiting in the hallway.

"Miranda was attacked," Garrus began but was cut off.

Jack scoffed, "The Cheerleader break a nail? I don't have time for this shit."

"same group who got to her on Lazarus." Garrus continued, ignoring the human female, he still didn't understand why she was on the mission. Sure she was a powerful biotic, but so were Shepard and Miranda and they were getting a _Justicar_ if all went to plan.

Jacob drew in a sharp breath, "They get to her?"

Garrus nodded, "From what we could tell they did something to erase the last five weeks of her memory." His voice was grave but there was also a sense of hesitancy, what was he supposed to tell them? Should he let them in? What would they think of Shepard if they saw what she'd done?

"Shit." Jacob exhaled, scratching his cheek as he thought that through, "So she'd still think we're supposed to be on Lazarus and Shepard's still out."

Garrus nodded, "She was... surprised, to say the least."

"Oh Shep's not gonna be happy." Kasumi commented, her stealth net flickering a little. Of course her first thoughts were of the last few days where Shep and Miranda's relationship had taken a turn for the more romantic rather than being at each others throats in the hostile sense.

"She's not, she's _really_ not." Garrus muttered and shifted uncomfortably.

"Huh, bet she's hunting down the bastards right now right." Massani grinned, about to call in with the fiery hellcat he knew would be on a warpath right now.

"No need. She... dealt with them already, at least the ones here." Now he was getting really uncomfortable and tried to clear the rasp in his throat.

Kasumi tilted her head a little as she looked up at the shifty turian, "What'd she do?"

"And why are you out here and not in there Turian?" Grunt growled, jutting his jaw towards the door where Shepard was clearly located.

Now Garrus took a deep breath, "Illium police are on their way and they can't see what's in there. Shepard and Miranda are cleaning up before they call in a Cerberus team to handle the mess Shepard left. As for what she did... let's say I now understand why they call her the Butcher." He straightened and his mandibles clicked, "We'll need people on all the entrances to make sure the police don't get in."

"They call Super Bitch the Butcher?... Wait as in _the_ Butcher of Torfan? _That's_ Shepard?" Jack's eyes lit up at the prospect, she hadn't made that connection, "I _gotta_ see this!" She chuckled and pushed passed Jacob to go through the door.

Garrus sighed as Grunt lumbered after the eager human female but the other three made no move to follow just yet.

Massani had an idea of what to expect, he'd seen the Butcher in action before, _real_ action, not the tame shit she'd kept herself restrained to on Omega because of her broken hand. That was the reason he followed her, he knew damn well not to piss her off and that wherever she went would get the most action... that and he wanted her with him when he confronted Santiago.

Jacob and Kasumi just weren't all that eager to see for themselves what had Garrus so on edge.

"This and the emergency stairwell are the only entrances to the affected area, unless they decide to go through the windows or something, but I doubt it'll come to that." Garrus looked to the humans to see what they'd decide to do.

"It'd be best if at least one of us stays with you." Jacob nodded, security detail he was certainly familiar with having spent the last two years doing it on Lazarus.

"I'll grab the squints and take the stairs, give those lightweights a surprise if they try to slip in the back." Massani smirked and moved out to round up the psychotic nut-job and baby krogan.

"How- how's Shep really doing?" Kasumi asked softly now it was just the three of them.

"Bad. I've never seen her so... angry. By the spirits if she had the power to bring the one who damaged Miranda's mind back to life she'd do so just to rip him apart again and again." He shook his head, he had already decided he wouldn't mention anything about her real name. "I believe she's in a state of shock, both of them are. It'll take Shepard awhile to wash off all the blood I think."

"I'd better go check up on them I think." Kasumi took a deep breath before she too slipped away leaving just Jacob and Garrus to guard the door.

XXX

Jack and Grunt looked around at the carnage, both of them grinning like kids in a candy store.

"Sweet! I had no idea she had _this_ in her!" Jack laughed, kicking over the mangled wreck of a body a little too gleefully.

Grunt took it all in, "I smell rage and fear." His deep gravelly voice seemed to boom in the silence of the destruction around them.

Jack laughed, "Bet they were pissing themselves. Check this guy out! Looks like she punched clean through his chest!"

"Shepard is strong from a human." Grunt nodded in approval, he already know this from how easily she had defeated him when he'd first challenged her.

"Pfft she ain't the only strong human you overgrown lizard." Jack flared her biotics and glared at him fiercely.

"You're all noise and no bite. Without your biotics you're as weak as the rest of your kind." Grunt challenged her.

"Knock it off you two." Massani barked at them, on his way to the fire escape. "You're with me, making sure no damn police idiots get in here."

"We get to scare off cops? I'm so fucking in!" Jack smiled maliciously at the very thought of it, she'd have it out with Grunt later, she wasn't fussy.

Grunt lumbered after the two humans with one last look at the broken and twisted bodies Shepard had left behind. She was a worthy battlemaster.

XXX

Miranda tensed as she felt something dark and menacing at the peripheral edges of Stephanie's mind.

Shepard felt Miranda's response and realized what she was tensing at with a gasp. Pushing Miranda back from her and holding her head with a groan she turned away from the surprised and stunned woman to try and shield her mind from tainting Miranda's.

"Stephanie?" Miranda voiced softly, reaching out to put her hand on Shepard's shoulder.

Shepard shrugged her off, "Don't, please don't. I can't... I can't taint you to." She whispered trying desperately to rein in the beast inside her.

Miranda frowned, she could feel all her progress at calming Shepard unravelling quickly. Words, thoughts and emotions that had been rolling through Shepard came to her. The feral darkness that had taken over Shepard's mind and caused her violence had been triggered. If it was triggered then it was a conditioned response. If it was a conditioned response then _someone_ had programmed her mind with it. Making a quick decision she took Shepard firmly by the shoulders and shoved her against the tiles, "You stop right there Shepard!"

Shepard looked up at her in surprise at the forcefulness in Miranda's being as Miranda pushed herself back into her mind.

"Don't you get it? This thing inside you isn't you being tainted. You've been conditioned, it's not something that can be transferred or can taint others."

"It's _dangerous_ and I can't always control it!"

"That's been made quite evident." Miranda continued to pin Shepard to the wall, a fiercely determined expression and will coursing through her.

Shepard winced at the harsh tone that she couldn't argue with. She turned her face away, eyes closed, face down in shame.

Miranda hissed and grabbed Shepard's jaw forcing her to look up again, "Shepard stop and _think_."

Shepard's looked up at her quickly and her breath hitched in her throat as she felt completely at the mercy of Miranda right now, burning again, wet, naked, broken, vulnerable and confused.

"When do you remember losing control?" Miranda demanded, expecting an answer promptly.

Shepard swallowed, "When EDI said you were in danger."

Miranda had expected that, "You said that I'm your calm, your centre. You only lost control when I was threatened, what does that tell you?"

Shepard took a deep breath and bit her lip, Miranda right now felt cool and unyielding, like solid earth containing her explosive lava and cooling her down. Miranda was so strong and was imposing that strength on her right now, commanding her thoughts to flow in the direction she demanded when Shepard herself felt so lost and out of control. Shepard closed her eyes and exhaled slowly before she whispered her response into Miranda's mind, '_That even the beast knows I'd be lost without you.'_

Miranda was actually startled by that response but she'd work with it, her mind ticking over quickly, "Exactly, so do you think it'd harm me?"

Shepard's eyes flew open in surprise and shock at the simple statement that had such a profound meaning to her. "No." Her response was barely more than a whisper as her mind was trying to wrap itself around the concept Miranda was trying to get her to understand.

Now Miranda smiled, her expression and being softening, "So get it out of your thick head that you need to protect me, _Stephanie_." she released her hold on Shepard's jaw and tapped the side of her head with a smirk.

Shepard found herself relaxing into Miranda's cool strength and smiled, "Thick head huh? I guess you'd know, you had to put it back together after all."

"And I do damn good work." Miranda leaned down again.

"Hmmm that you do." Shepard murmured before those lips were upon hers again in a soft caress, the fear from moments ago melting away at Miranda's words and touch.

Miranda might not have been able to remember everything but this, Stephanie, felt so right. It had been so long since she'd ever let herself feel like this... not since Persephone.

They both groaned when they heard the door open.

"Hey Shep, you in here?" Kasumi's usually perky voice was somewhat subdued.

Miranda turned her head slightly to kiss along Shepard's cheek so she could answer.

"Yeah, hey can you chuck me a towel from the dispenser, mine fell into the water." Shepard sighed, her cheeks flushing as Miranda's hand slid down her side then up to cup her breast which sent a heated wave of desire through her. She could _feel_ Miranda smiling into her neck as she kissed her way down to her pulse point and lingered there.

"Sure thing Shep." Kasumi wasn't sure if she was relieved to have found Shepard after seeing what she'd done to those people outside but she sounded okay, tired but okay. She silently moved over to the dispenser and less than a minute later a fresh white towel was hung over the door of the cubicle Shepard was in. "Garrus gave us a little run down on what happened, are you... alright?"

Shepard smiled as Miranda pulled back, her knees felt a little weak, especially with that smouldering look in Miranda's eyes that promised more later. "I'm okay now."

Miranda winked and reached for the towel.

Shepard made no move to argue when Miranda began to dry her off.

"And Miranda? I haven't seen her yet. Garrus said she's lost some of her memory." Kasumi sat herself on the sink counter, leaning back against the mirror and happy to just wait there for the time being.

Shepard reached up and touched Miranda's cheek, '_You want to answer or shall I?'_

Miranda kissed her hand, "I'm fine Miss Goto, my memories are returning so no permanent damage as far as I can tell."

Kasumi's looked at the cubicles, that sounded suspiciously like Miranda was in the same cubicle as Shep... she tilted her head slightly to listen more attentively, "Ah, that's good..." Was that a gasp? "Wait a minute... am I interrupting something...?"

Shepard and Miranda exchanged a humorous glance, "Well she only started getting really frisky when you came in."

Miranda hit Shepard on the arm with a small pout and Shepard laughed.

"In _that_ case you want me to stay or give you two lovebirds some space?" Kasumi couldn't help but grin, her romantic side winning out over the wary concern she had of Shepard.

"We've got other things to be doing anyway. I'll leave you to handle local law enforcement while I contact the Illusive Man. Keep it vague like you did Binary Helix." Miranda suggested to Shepard, she'd been impressed with how tight lipped Shepard had been when reporters had tried to get the newly commissioned SPECTRE to reveal details about the 'accident' that had happened in Binary Helix's labs on Noveria.

Shepard put on the mock stern face, "SPECTRE investigation, no comment, got it ma'am."

Miranda stole a quick kiss before putting the towel over Shepard's head and tousling her hair.

"Hey what!" Shepard's muffled complaint sounded as she only half-heartedly tried to free herself.

"Make it quick, local law enforcement will be here shortly if they're not already." Miranda smirked and slipped out of the cubicle to a grinning Kasumi waiting outside. Miranda nodded curtly, checked her appearance, a little damp but nothing overly noticeable, then strode out confidently.

Shepard emerged not long after, her hair mussed up which looked a little adorable with her in her armour. It was a good thing her armour was black as the blood didn't stand out so much on it.

Kasumi chuckled, right now Shep did not look like a monstrous killer and it put her at ease.

Shepard huffed and ran her fingers through her hair to try and give it a semblance of order. "Gah, do you have a hair tie or something?" she grumbled.

Kasumi grinned and held a simple black band out to the disgruntled marine, "So, you and Miranda?"

"That's a yes, definitely a yes." Shepard smirked, her eyes twinkling for a moment before she became serious again, "Only took me losing control of my senses and massacring a bunch of idiots who thought they could get away with messing up her brain."

"Uh, yeah, about that... that was a little... uh extreme don't you think?" Kasumi asked nervously.

Shepard took a deep breath, "Miranda isn't the only one who had her brain messed with. I can keep it under control most of the time, unless... unless Miranda's threatened. Then you want to get as far away from me as you can. She's the only..." she closed her eyes and lowered her face, "the only one I'll respond to. She's my centre, what holds me together and keeps me human when so much of my mind is no longer my own."

Kasumi's eyes widened, _that_ was something she'd never anticipated hearing, "So what is it you have to keep under control?"

"The best way I can describe it is that there's a beast inside me I keep locked away. It surfaces when I'm faced with extreme injustice against innocent people but until today there was only once I'd lost control of it."

"Torfan?"

"No, I was fourteen. Miranda was attacked, I saw red but by the time I got there she was safe because of her father's security forces so I didn't hurt anyone. I was still in control on Torfan, and on Omega, but with things that have been happening, the biotic testing, losing myself to the Prothean Cipher the other day, my control has been pushed to the max. So today... today when that fucking scent hit me it triggered the beast and I couldn't fight it, not until I heard Miranda's voice. Then when EDI told me she was attacked..." Shepard didn't need to finish her sentence.

Kasumi reached over and put her hand on Shepard's shoulder, "Sounds to me like this is something you've been struggling with for a long time."

Shepard nodded and looked up at the thief who was still sitting on the counter, "We'll talk about it more later. I'm sure there's going to be a lot of questions and right now I've got to handle this mess as best I can."

Kasumi nodded and gave her a light pat, "Sure thing Shep, I got ya back."

Shepard gave a small smile, "Thanks Kasumi."

With that Shepard left the bathroom putting on her confident bravado and trademark swagger, concentrating her thoughts on remaining calm and in control thanks to Miranda.

Kasumi vanished from sight as she activated her stealth net and followed Shep who clearly had a whole lot more to deal with than she'd ever imagined.

XXX

Shepard strode out into the lobby where Garrus and Jacob were fending off a dozen officers and things were getting... heated.

"Commander Shepard is dead, now weapons down and on the ground _now!"_ A very pissed off Asari officer shouted at Garrus who was being obstinate and refusing to back down.

"I beg to differ _officer_." Shepard's voice cut across all others and she sounded icy cold.

"And who do you think _you _are? Another one of _Commander Shepard's_ lackeys?" the officer sneered.

At that Shepard flared her biotics powerfully, "I _AM _Shepard, and it's _SPECTRE_ in case you missed the newsflash." Even her voice boomed, waves of dark energy pouring from her, flashing with the anger of her words.

There was no small amount of swearing from the officers, asari and turian alike, as they looked upon the enraged and powerful biotic who looked a damn lot like the supposedly dead Commander Shepard.

"Check the Council's records, you'll see that I'm very much alive and very much still a SPECTRE." She snapped at the scowling officer who had yet to lower her weapon. "Now this is a SPECTRE investigation and does not concern your people at this point in time. If I decide your presence is necessary I'll call." She reigned in her biotic energy now.

The officer considered her, "We had calls of screams and gunfire."

Shepard scoffed, "Of course you did, it's _me_, nothing I do happens without screams and gunfire. I'm damn surprised nothing actually blew up." She looked to Garrus, "Nothing blew up did it Garrus?"

Garrus chuckled, "Other than your temper? No, but it's still early in the day, anything could happen." He shrugged and glanced back at the officer.

"Glad you think this situation is _amusing_, _SPECTRE._ I'm _Detective_ Khali, I'll need a scan to verify your identification." She lowered her weapon now and activated her omni-tool.

Shepard took off her glove, though that wasn't usually required she didn't want the scan to pick up the numerous genetic markers her armour would be covered in from all the blood of her victims. She waved her hand over the omni-tool.

After a moment the results came back and Khali's eyes widened as it confirmed that this human woman was indeed _the_ Commander Shepard. "You have my apologies, Commander."

"SPECTRE." She corrected, pulling her glove back on, antagonizing local law enforcement was _not_ the way to go about moving freely with as little scrutiny as possible but right now she had to establish that she had the authority here.

"So what _can_ you tell me about what happened here _SPECTRE_?" Khali was a little brusque in her delivery but SPECTRE's always gave her a headache, especially the famous ones.

"What happened is part of an ongoing investigation that's classified." Shepard had a pretty damn good poker face and right now was putting it to good use.

Khali's eyes narrowed, "Should we be expecting any more bullets?"

"Well nothing's blown up yet, usually does when I'm around."

"Like I said, the day's still young Shepard." Garrus shot her a turian version of a grin with a hint of mirth in his tone.

Shepard shot him a mock scathing glare, "Don't push it Vakarian, or we'll be _sparring_ later."

Garrus just smirked and remained silent.

Khali was distracted for a moment by a communication and she glared at Shepard, "Do you have people on the stairs?"

Shepard glanced at Garrus.

"Massani, Jack and Grunt." He nodded.

Shepard groaned, "Seriously? The shoot now, shoot later and maybe add a little head crushing for the fun of it bunch? And you _seriously_ didn't expect trouble?" She tapped her communicator, "Jack, Grunt put them down! You break them you bought them."

"_Aw Butch you're no fun! How come you got to..."_ Jack began to whine.

Shepard's eyes went red, "Call me that again and I'll fucking rip your heart out then have Lawson bring you back so I can kick your scrawny inked arse out an airlock. Now stand down or I'll give you a _personal_ demonstration of what I can do." She snarled furiously.

Jack swallowed and immediately reigned in her biotics, releasing a turian officer, "_Shutting the fuck up now."_

"Good decision. Grunt?"

"_No skull crushing today, understood Shepard."_ His deep voice rumbled in acknowledgement, he hadn't bothered to do more than growl at the puny officers who'd backed away from him rather promptly.

"Massani, keep'em in line or I'm taking it out on _your_ old, wrinkly arse." Shepard warned him firmly and with pissed off authority.

Massani chuckled, "_Roger that ma'am. Glad you're feelin' better."_

"Stow it Massani." Shepard huffed and ended the communication, "I do recommend pulling your people out, Detective, they're not required and my squad is used to working out in the Terminus."

"Keep them in line _SPECTRE_ and we won't have a problem. I'll be leaving some officers to keep an eye on things and sort out the mess you left of the floors around this one." Khali growled then stalked away, gesturing to her people in frustrated movements.

"Well that could've gone worse." Garrus shrugged, looking to Shepard and taking her in. She was still a little pale but that was probably to be expected after having bathed in blood. He could smell it still covering her armour, the heavy metallic scent of blood and gore that she'd been able to wash off her person but it would take work to wash it off her armour.

"Yeah. I'm guessing a cleanup crew from the Illusive Man will be here shortly, Jacob check their credentials to make sure it isn't Khali's people trying to worm their way in. I'm going to get Miranda back to the ship and out of harms way for now. Good news is she's starting to recover memories, bad news... hell," she rubbed the back of her neck, "we're gonna have to treat any Cerberus personnel we can't personally vouch for with suspicion. Whoever these people are, they've compromised Cerberus." she kept her voice soft so only the two men either side of her could hear her.

Jacob took a deep breath, that was big, huge, the Illusive Man was not going to like this at all. It did, however, assure him that it wasn't his fault they'd gotten to Miranda on Lazarus, that had been eating him up more than a little since finding out what was going on.

Shepard left them to remain on guard and went to find Miranda, she'd be speaking with the Illusive Man and would probably appreciate some back up because it wasn't going to be pretty.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Well got some interesting reviews on the last chapter! He he he. I've stored away the sumo suit until the next time I throw you all a curve ball that has you up in arms! Did I make up for it a little in this one? ;)<br>**_

_**Don't forget to check out my tumblr! (bringerofdestruction. tumblr. com) You'll find some new dossiers up! Oh and post questions on it! You might be surprised who answers! XD  
><strong>_

_**Thank you to everyone who's been reviewing all my stories. It's great encouragement and spurs on my muse for more! So please continue to review! Takes only a minute and I really appreciate it!  
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	36. Emotional Rollercoasters

Shepard didn't have to know where Miranda was, she could feel her as she got closer to the woman she loved. Knocking on an office door she sensed Miri behind she kept her knuckles to a light rap in case Miri was talking to the Illusive Man. When she stuck her head in she found Miranda standing by the window looking deep in thought.

Miranda was indeed lost in thought. She hadn't actually contacted the Illusive Man directly yet. She had the authority to authorize a cleanup crew then inform him once the situation was under control. It was this authority she used right now as it would be best to both give herself time to think of the best way to handle the situation and to return to the Normandy for a secure connection. She almost didn't realize Shepard was in the room with her, until she felt a light, hesitant touch on the small of her back. Glancing over her shoulder she smiled as Shepard stepped into her field of vision.

"So what's the plan? Are you needed here or can Jacob handle it?" Shepard asked more firmly than intended and winced a little, "Sorry, just want to get you to the Normandy as soon as possible," she murmured.

Ordinarily Miranda would have quickly asserted that she could take care of herself, however, in this particular situation she could understand Shepard's concern. "I need to contact the Illusive Man via the secure channel as it is so Jacob will have to handle the cleanup operatives."

"Any idea what you're gonna say to him?" Shepard scoffed at herself, "Scratch that you've probably got it all..."

"No I don't." Miranda interrupted and shook her head. "I don't even fully understand it myself."

Shepard's eyes widened, that was a huge statement in itself. Miranda Lawson was actually admitting to not understanding something. Shaking herself slightly she slid her arms around Miranda's waist and rested her head on Miri's shoulder, "You will. You can figure out most things."

"Just _most_ things?" Miranda smirked, putting her hands over Shepard's arms and leaning into the strong marine beside her, finding no small measure of comfort in the embrace.

Shepard kissed her lightly on the cheek, "Well it just wouldn't be fun if you could figure out _everything_ now would it," she murmured softly.

Miranda shivered and found herself suddenly liking the idea of not knowing everything, not that she ever thought she truly could but Stephanie made it sound so sexy.

Shepard pressed her forehead against the side of Miri's head, "Let's go back to the Normandy, I've had enough of this place," her voice was a whisper solely for Miranda to hear even though there was no one else around.

Miranda understood what she was feeling perfectly clearly without having to rely on their connection to interpret it, "Indeed, I think we've _both_ had more than enough of it."

"Good, cos I told Jacob and Garrus they're in charge." Shepard smirked, holding Miri a little tighter in anticipation for her response.

Miranda tried to jerk around to face Shepard with a scowl but was trapped in her arms.

"Figured if you didn't come willingly I'd drag your sexy ass outta here either over my shoulder or bridal style." Shepard chuckled, letting her light teasing flow into Miri and was rewarded with a huff and roll of the eyes.

"I'd like to see you try," Miranda scoffed at the very idea of it.

Shepard's eyes brightened and a wide smile lit up her face, she loosened her grip and stepped back, "You know the last time you told me that I punched you in the face, knocked you out cold and had you sedated."

Miranda turned to her in disbelief.

"True story, ask Jacob he carried you back to the shuttle." Shepard gave a nonchalant shrug but still grinning cheekily and backed further out of reach, "Bridal style." She winked then began to saunter away.

Miranda could practically feel the vibrations in her chest from Shepard's internal laughing though the frustrating marine refrained from outright doing so. Her first response was indignation. Until she recalled the state Shepard was in only a short time ago. She let out her pent up breath and followed after Shepard. If the teasing made her smile, and given the fact that she didn't remember the event in question, she'd let her get away with it... this once. She tried it again, however, and it was on.

Neither of them had said a word in the taxi ride to the port. Shepard letting Miranda think and Miranda figuring out the best way to handle this situation. But halfway there Shepard _did_ reach over and intertwined their fingers in a reassuring gesture.

Miranda had glanced over to see that Shepard was still looking out the window, concentrating on driving or at least adequately pretending to. Giving Shepard's hand a gentle squeeze she noted the smile that graced the gorgeous marine's lips and decided to continue holding the offered hand.

Before entering the ship Shepard gently took Miranda by the shoulder and stopped her, "Miri,"

Miranda stopped and turned to face Shepard curiously, it was strange being called that after so long.

"Say whatever you need to say to the Illusive Man." Shepard lightly brushed her fingertips over Miranda's heart, "I know how you really feel," she offered gently, a tender smile reached her darkened eyes.

The relief that flooded Miranda was palpable even without their connection. She closed the distance between them and kissed Shepard soundly, _Thank you._

Shepard really wished she wasn't wearing armour right now as she reached up and lightly ran her fingertips over Miranda's cheek, _You're welcome beautiful._

Miranda stopped kissing Shepard and pulled back with a startled expression.

Shepard mentally cursed and shrank a little, her cheeks flaming with embarrassment as she should have remembered how Miranda felt about her body, "Uh... sorry I..." She was stopped by a slender finger pressed against her lips.

Miranda smiled, "You're the first person to call me that and I haven't felt like cringing," she admitted softly, leaning in again, caressing Shepard's face and lightly brushing her lips over Shepard's once more.

When Miranda pulled back Shepard was still blushing but smiled shyly, "Right then, I'm gonna clean up this mess, let me know if you need me for anything." She rapped her knuckles against her breastplate and flakes of caked blood fluttered away.

Miranda donned her usual serious face and nodded, "I'm not sure the Justicar would take kindly to meeting you like that."

Shepard sighed, "Yeah, I'd..." she frowned, looking down at herself and not finishing the '_I'd rip me to shreds to' _that she'd begun to say, "better get going, this'll take me forever," she sighed in disgust and quickly made her way into the ship.

Striding confidently into the holographic communications link up to the Illusive Man, Miranda assumed her normal rigid posture and looked to him with her usual stoic expression, "We have a situation," she began calmly.

"So I see." The Illusive Man waited for her to continue, he had been keeping a very close eye on the Normandy of late and had been patiently waiting for her to make this call. He had every assurance that she would for he knew the way she worked. Miranda was not one to give half a report or alert him to something she herself wasn't fully versed in first, so he had not been worried only waiting.

Miranda had not gone straight to this meeting. Her first stop had been to her quarters where she'd locked the door and gone right to her terminal to look over her records and recent reports. It had been... enlightening, to say the least. So much had happened in the last weeks and _not_ just what was happening between her and Shepard.

She relayed the relevant information to the Illusive Man, which summarized all the factual data they'd discovered pertaining to herself and the memory blocks put in place on Lazarus and back at the lab. Not having any concrete evidence concerning Shepard's battle with her inner beast she made no mention of it at all, nor of their connection.

The Illusive Man listened to all that Miranda said and considered all that she didn't say. He knew there was something of a more personal development occurring between Miranda and Shepard, he'd been keeping close tabs on it in fact. That Miranda said nothing of it right now could mean one of two things; she was using the blossoming relationship as a tool to keep Shepard under control or she truly was 'falling' for her project. Judging by past experience he would assume the former, however he had not gotten to where he was today by making assumptions.

"How has Shepard been dealing with this development then?" The Illusive Man casually tapped the end of his cigarette.

Miranda knew how to play this game perfectly well and flashed him a secretive smile, "She's become very concerned with my wellbeing and very supportive in assisting my recovery. Shepard insisted that Doctor Rana Thanoptis accompany us and has allowed us time to investigate the matter while she locates the subjects on Illium. It appears that when a member of her crew is faced with a personal situation she opens herself up significantly to help them through it."

The Illusive Man took a drag from his cigarette as he listened.

"She has become more compliant and easier to manage over recent weeks now she has had time to adjust to her new environment." She finished responding to his question with a nod.

"The Commander is not one to be toyed with Miranda, I trust your judgement on this matter but I advise that you be cautious in how you manage her. I shall begin an investigation into who these people are and how they've been able circumvent our security measures to ensure it does not happen again. I'm waiting for your report on the matter. Is there anything else?" He looked at her pointedly.

Miranda met his gaze unfazed by his optical implants, "No."

"Then do what you must to restore your memory but ensure Shepard remains focussed. Don't allow her concern for others to cloud her judgement." He tapped the console on the arm of his chair, ending the communication.

Miranda could only presume that he would put together a small team to investigate and hoped with everything within her that team didn't include Kai Leng. She hated that violent xenophobic man on the best of days and did _not_ want him to learn anything personal about her that wasn't already public knowledge. The very thought of him made her shudder. Turning on her heel she strode out and instead of heading right through the lab which she usually did to avoid Jacob she went left into the armoury.

Shepard glanced up, she was almost done, "How'd it go?"

Miranda's gaze roved over the figure of the marine clad only in her skin tight, black underlay and liked what she saw immensely, "Well enough. He's putting together a team to investigate the people who did this." She tapped the side of her head.

"Good. Hope they find the bastards and let me know where to find them because I'm gonna show them exactly how _effective_ their techniques were," Shepard growled aggressively, polishing the last piece of her armour with vigour.

Miranda strode over to her and wordlessly slid her hand across Shepard's shoulders.

Shepard sighed and turned slightly to press her cheek into Miranda's stomach, closing her eyes as she did and just breathing in Miranda's scent.

"I know you want to stop them, but right now we've got bigger concerns. We don't know how long the Justicar will be here, especially if she's hunting a particular person. You're going to have to convince her to put the fate of the galaxy over the fate of a few victims." Miranda tenderly ran her fingers through Shepard's slightly damp hair.

"Yeah. Plan on scoffing down some food then heading out to find her. Just hope I didn't burn any bridges with Khali's people seeing as I have to go to the police tracking office. Fingers crossed I can bat my eyelashes at the Asari on the desk and she'll be eager to comply with my request." Shepard smiled, snaking her arm around Miranda's waist and holding her close.

"They tend to be more interested in that swagger of yours." Miranda pointed out wryly, a touch of jealousy coming through their connection.

"And I thought it was _your_ sexy ass they were all ogling... wait swagger? You think I _swagger?_" Shepard pulled back to look up at Miranda with a raised brow but still kept her arm around Miri's waist.

"You tend to swing your hips when you walk, that constitutes a swagger." Miranda clarified for the clueless woman.

Shepard's eyes sparkled, "So you've been watching my hips then have you." She swivelled around to face Miri now and took hold of the woman's sensuous hips, gently massaging them.

Miranda scowled down at Shepard and crossed her arms, but _didn't_ pull away from her, "I have better things to do with my time."

Shepard couldn't help herself, "Like watch my ass?"

Miranda scoffed, "You wish."

"Certainly do, I know I like watching yours." Shepard's thumbs ran up under Miranda's shirt, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

"You are incorrigible Shepard," huffed Miranda though inwardly she smiled then recriminated herself as Shepard's smirk widened because she felt the inner smile.

"You like it," Shepard purred seductively. She pushed up the right side of Miranda's shirt enough to expose the pale skin of her hip and leaned in.

Miranda bit her lip to stop the gasp as Shepard's soft, moist lips took hold of her. Her right hand snapped down to that chocolate brown hair when Shepard's teeth raked across her skin quickly followed by her warm, wet tongue to soothe the scrape. Her heart raced and she could feel herself heating up quickly when Shepard slowly, tantalizingly kissed her way to her navel with one hand pushing up her shirt while the other slid around behind her and firmly massaged, it felt incredible.

Shepard lazily traced a circle around Miranda's cute little navel with her tongue before she pulled back with an impish smile, "Later beautiful?" she purred, the huskiness in her voice even more pronounced than usual.

"God yes," Miranda breathed, groaning because Shepard had stopped but also because they couldn't do this right now and especially not right here where anyone could waltz in on them. They wouldn't hear the end of it if that happened.

Shepard rose to her feet, pressing up against Miranda and kissing along her jaw to just under her ear, "You know I bought something to share with you for when you get your memory back. But it's a surprise," she whispered softly in Miranda's ear, her lips brushing against the sensitive lobe.

It sent shivers down Miranda's spine, "You know I could just search the Loft and find it myself."

"Ah but that would ruin the surprise, beautiful. Think of it as incentive for you to concentrate on beating this mental block into submission while I concentrate on the mission and getting who we need for it." Shepard finished speaking with a nibbling kiss on the soft, tender skin of Miri's ear.

Miranda moaned deep in the back of her throat so that Shepard only really felt the rumble of it and the accompanied gasp, "I think I can work with that," Miranda managed to say coherently.

"Excellent, now would you like to join me for something to eat before hitting the data feeds, give that incredible mind of yours a little sustenance to improve peak performance?" Shepard smiled into Miranda's neck, running her hands up the slender back of the perfect woman in her arms.

"That sounds like a suitable course of action, to ensure optimum working conditions." Miranda couldn't help but smile at the way Shepard had worded her request and hugged the sexy figure tighter, kissing her neck and feeling the bubbling sense of happiness and relief that was washing through Shepard and further rinsing away the horror of the day.

The Illusive Man had seen enough for the time being and clicked off the feed. Miranda was handling Shepard very well considering how rocky it had been between them initially. He brought up another video file that EDI had captured. It had been surprisingly unorthodox and unprecedented the action the AI had taken to assist Shepard, this action had also been able to record what the AI had seen.

Of particular interest to him were a particular quartet of revelations. First that the AI had been able to influence Shepard out of her frenzied state by imitating Miranda's voice. Second that Shepard's real name was Persephone Eve Calleyuss. Third that _Persephone_ had a prior relationship with Miranda that Miranda was unaware of at this point in time. Finally that if Miranda became aware of _Persephone's_ identity then there was the possibility of it being fatal for his top operative.

Just who was _Persephone,_ what was that thing that possessed her when Miranda was in danger, why was Miranda's voice able to control or rather calm that possessed rage and who had programmed them both?

All these questions and more needed answering.

He tapped his console and called a suitable source to begin investigating, "I have a job for you, I think you'll like it." He smirked.

Shepard sauntered into the tracking office with her confident swagger and cool expression, she'd actually taken the time to observe how the Asari responded to her as she strode through the market place to reach the office. Miranda had been right, the Asari _did_ seem to pay her close attention. How had she not really noticed it before? It actually made her feel rather self conscious but it was a useful tool in keeping the Asari more _helpful_.

At the sound of the door swishing open the overworked and underpaid officer rolled her eyes and groaned to herself. That was until she glanced over and the sexiest human woman she'd ever seen sauntered towards her. Her eyes widened a little at the state of the art black armour, the high end weapons that were clipped on magnetic strips at her hips but thankfully her hands weren't near them for the time being. This was no ordinary merc closing in on her.

"Good afternoon officer," Shepard greeted the stunned Asari with a charming smile and slight nod of her head which caused the bangs that framed the right side of her face to sway forward. Calmly she reached up and tucked them back behind her ear, noting that the Asari was watching her movements closely.

"Well look at _you_, what can I do for you gorgeous?" The officer beamed up at the merc.

Shepard chuckled and held out her hand over the desk for the Asari.

The Asari eagerly took it and shook hands.

"I'm Stephanie Shepard and I'm hoping you could help me with something." She knew that by omitting the 'Commander' her identity would remain hidden for the time being.

"Dara, nice to meet you Stephanie. I can certainly try to help, shoot... uh not literally I mean." The Asari looked worried for a moment.

Shepard released her hand with another chuckle, "Relax, I don't generally shoot unless I'm being shot at first. So unless you plan on shooting me with more than that gorgeous smile you're pretty safe."

Dara's cheeks darkened with a blush at the smooth talking human, "Good to know."

"This is the Tracking Office yes? I'm looking for someone I've been told you're keeping tabs on." Shepard got to business quickly.

Dara nodded and quickly brought up the search screen on her console, "Name?"

"Justicar Samara." Shepard expected a bit of resistance at that and wasn't let down.

Dara looked up with a frown, "Why are you looking for her?" Dara became a little panicked, "Has she killed someone already? That's the _last_ thing we need," she groaned, a headache starting to form at the mere thought of it.

"She hasn't that I'm aware of. I'm on a mission I need her help with."

Dara was instantly skeptical, "You think you can just _ask_ a _Justicar_ to help you on a _mission?_" All previous inclination to help gone at the arrogance of a human to think they could just do that.

"I would say it can't hurt to ask... but given the reputation of the Justicars I think this could hurt plenty." She smirked at first but then became serious, "I may not be Asari, but I am aware of the importance and reverence accorded towards Justicars. This is not a request I'm making lightly nor is my mission an insignificant one. I'm asking you nicely for your assistance, I really don't want to have to invoke my Spectre authority."

At that Dara scoffed, "There hasn't been a human Spectre since Shepard..." As soon as she said it her eyes became saucers, "What did you say your name was again?" her voice was soft in concern.

Shepard smiled, "Stephanie Shepard, first Human Spectre, quite a list of associated names and accomplishments I'm constantly trying to avoid mentioning." She bowed her head respectfully.

"But aren't you-didn't you..." Now Dara was utterly floored.

"Die? Yes. Modern science the associated advancements in medical technology are quite something else. I'm not quite as human as I used to be, lot of cybernetics I'm told. But not cloned, memory intact and a few sweet upgrades so I'm not complaining. Just no setting off an EMP near me, I don't think I'll like that." She winked, grinning from ear to ear to put the Asari officer back at ease.

Dara actually smiled and shook her head with a slight chuckle, "I'll keep that in mind, you might shoot me." The skepticism was replaced with wonder as it sunk in that she was face to face with _the_ Commander Shepard. "So what was it like, taking on Saren and the Geth and saving the Citadel like you did?"

The smile faded and Shepard had to fight the scowl she could feel wanting to show itself, "What kind of question is that? _What was it like?_" she huffed, "It was the hardest mission I've ever been on. I lost good people, friends to Saren and his fucked up..." she stopped herself with a grunt, "Look, that's a really loaded question alright. The Council's done everything in its power to bury what really happened and anything I say on it they make out to be crazy because they can't be bothered trying to comprehend the magnitude of what's coming."

Dara winced, "Alright, I'll give you that was a pretty stupid question. But I'm really curious about what you thinks coming."

Shepard considered her long and hard, gone was the friendly face of moments ago and in its place was the Commander. "Did you see any footage of Saren's flagship?"

"Oh yes, that thing was monstrous!" Dara nodded quickly.

"Did it look like any of the Geth ships?"

Dara thought about it, "Not really, no."

"That's because it wasn't Geth. Now Justicar Samara if you'd be so kind." Shepard nodded to the console.

"But if it wasn't Geth then what was it?" Dara leaned forward on her elbows.

Shepard cursed mentally, "It clearly doesn't matter since the Council have done everything in their power to smother everything about it. _Justicar Samara_ if you please," she put a bit more force into her tone this time.

Dara nodded and quickly brought up the details, "Right, she last checked in to Precinct 4-14, you'll find it here." She showed the famous Spectre the location.

"Thank you Officer Dara, that's all I need for now." Shepard nodded gratefully, really wanting to get out of there immediately.

"You're welcome Spectre, before you go..." Dara became a bit sheepish, "I couldn't get your autograph could I?" the hopeful tone was hard to ignore.

Shepard's thoughts instantly went to a certain Conrad Verner and she cringed. "What would you like me to sign?" She rubbed her neck in resignation chanting _good impression, good impression _in her head.

Dara's face lit up and she looked around for something now that she was on the spot.

Shepard waited, somewhat impatiently.

Finding a blank datapad Dara held it out to Shepard eagerly.

Shepard had learned the hard way that autographs and official signatures needed to look very different. So she'd made her autograph a larger and flowing _CMDR S. Shepard_ as that's the name everyone knew her by and it wasn't accepted as an official signature as it included her rank.

Dara bit her bottom lip to keep from squealing in excitement as _Commander Shepard_ handed back the signed datapad, "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you! If you need anything else come by and see me!"

"Thank you Dara." Shepard nodded then turned and quickly departed the small office station. She took a deep breath and exhaled in relief when the door closed behind her. That was until someone called out her name.

"Commander Shepard? Is that you?"

Stiffening and cringing Shepard turned to find a beautiful but _green skinned_ Asari approaching her with what looked like relief on her face. After a moment she recognized her, "Shiala!" She beamed and moved to meet her with open arms, "Wow Shiala this is a surprise!"

Shiala chuckled, "Indeed, for me as well. I'd heard you passed on." She hugged the human who'd saved her from the Thorian then spared her life on Feros and given her hope.

"Yeah, long story that one," Shepard sighed, not wanting to get into that again so soon.

"No doubt." Shiala pulled back and looked at the young human woman, taking her in closely and noting the change in her eye colour, the fresh scars. Reaching up she lightly ran her fingertips over them, "Life has not been easy since we met has it," her voice was soft, heavy with sadness.

"Hardly." Shepard rolled her eyes but smiled, she didn't mind Shiala touching her face so tenderly after their extensive melding on Feros to transfer the Cipher. This Asari knew far more about her than just about any other living being, had been in the depths of her mind and seen what lurked there, she had shared the burden of the Cipher and understood the truth of what they were to face with the Reapers. "How's Feros doing?"

At that Shiala cupped Shepard's face, her expression further saddened, "That is why I'm here. I'm advocating the colonists to Baria Frontiers."

Shepard frowned in confusion, the name not really ringing any bells right now.

Shiala withdrew her hand, "They're an exploration and medical research group. Since the infection of Thorian spores the Colonists have been suffering residual side effects."

Shepard fired up instantly, "Is it the Thorian? Did it survive our last encounter? I swear say the word and I'm there, I'll make sure it's good and..."

Shiala chuckled at the human, finding her protective concern endearing, "While I can understand your concern considering all the trouble you and your team went to in destroying it you can rest assured that the Thorian is well and truly departed from this universe."

Shepard relaxed and waited for Shiala to continue.

"But the colonists are still suffering side effects from their time under its dominion. Crippling headaches, muscle spasms, shared sensations and other symptoms. The colonists asked me to represent them and find a suitable medical group to study the effects of the spores and seek a cure." At that guilt crossed her elegant features, "I fear I failed them. I approached several groups but as you can well imagine the colonists had very little financial backing once Exo Geni pulled out. Baria Frontiers responded with what we thought was an agreeable, and certainly the cheapest proposal. However, in the fine print of the contract it appears there was a clause that allows Baria Frontiers to perform invasive procedures without prior consent of the colonists."

Shepard clenched her fists and jaws as anger coursed through her, she could _feel_ her eyes starting to glow.

Shiala's brow rose slightly as Shepard's eyes and scars began to glow a soft red, "I've come here to try and re-negotiate the contract to put an end to this, however, the Baria Frontiers representative refuses to re-negotiate and I've hit a wall I cannot seem to surmount."

Shepard didn't need to hear more, "Point me at'em."

"I had hoped you'd help. Erinya is the representative to speak to, her office is in that building there." Shiala gestured to an office front with large windows that came complete with a sky blue skinned Asari scowling at them.

"That's her right?"

"Yes." Shiala wasn't about to comment on her rather nasty disposition at this point in time.

"I'm on it." Shepard straightened her shoulders and brought out the Commander intimidation walk.

Passing a couple of Asari outside the front of Baria Frontiers she paused as she overheard the conversation between them. One of them was clearly very unimpressed with having to deal with the pureblood bitch Erinya and the other going as far as commenting that Erinya had had pureblood kids and purebloods shouldn't be allowed to breed.

Shepard frowned, that was a bit of an extreme viewpoint, but it did brace her for the fact that if Erinya was a bitch even to her own kind then this was going to be interesting.

The atmosphere in the sparse office as Shepard entered was already hostile, Erinya was _already_ glaring at her like she was a geth to be ripped apart. Those blue eyes were narrowed, her blue skin flushed with outrage, her entire face pinched in what appeared to be a perpetual scowl.

"I know why you're here _human_, I saw you speaking with that _Shiala_." Erinya's words were dripping with disdain and she turned her attention to the datapad in her hands, "I've got nothing to say to you."

Shepard's anger flared and it took a great deal of concentration not to allow her biotics to flare as well, she could not control the fierce glow of her cybernetics though. She had to be careful how she proceeded, she could already see herself throwing the Asari against the wall and beating the crap out of her. Whatever she attempted had to be strategic, clearly this bitch didn't like people so appealing to any sense of compassion wasn't going to work without finding out more about her, something that she valued...

"From what I understand the tests you're undertaking on the colonists are needlessly invasive and are not actually aimed at helping them recover from the Thorian Spores, which was _why_ they came to you for help in the first place. What's the point of the tests?" Shepard's husky voice was sharp and to the point, she stood tall with her arms crossed in a posture of _you're not worth my time_. Mostly the posture was to keep her hands away from her guns, but Erinya didn't need to know that.

Erinya scoffed, "I don't need to explain _anything_ to you _human._"

Shepard's eyes narrowed, "Perhaps I need to introduce myself. I'm Shepard, _Commander_ Shepard, as in first _human_ Spectre Shepard."

Erinya looked her over with disbelieving disdain.

"I worked my ass off to save that colony, I shed sweat and blood to fight off Geth, Creepers and that fucking Thorian to save those people. And now _you're_ making their lives a living hell with your fucked up experiments. They've tried the nice approach, now you've got me to deal with," there was a definite threat in Shepard's growling tone as she shifted her position to have one hand on her hip while the other lingered beside her gun.

At the mention of Geth, Erinya's entire being darkened, "Geth, Turians, Krogans, _Humans_, the galaxy would a better off if _none_ of your primitive races ever rose up out of their primordial ooze. If the Asari were the only ones to reach the stars there wouldn't have been all the wars and bloodshed _your_ races have forced us into. Hundreds of thousands of my sisters have been massacred by your bloody and arrogant natures!" Erinya seethed furiously.

Shepard snorted and shook her head at the arrogant and blinded Asari, "Correct me if I'm wrong, _Erinya_, but _Humans_ have only been in the galactic community for a little over thirty years during which time we've _never_ involved the Asari in _any_ disputes. In fact if it wasn't for _Humans_ the Council and Citadel would have been lost throwing you all into chaos and destroying the peace you're currently enjoying. It was the _Human fleet_ that turned the tide of that battle, that defeated Sovereign and mopped up the Geth."

Erinya waved her hand dismissively, "Humans, Turians, Batarians, you're all the same. Give it time and you'll be tearing each others throats out and _my sisters_ will have to end it for you."

Shepard scoffed, "So you write off those around you for what _might_ happen. What the hell happened to you to make you such a xenophobic bitch that even your own _sisters_ despise?"

Erinya slammed the datapad in her hands, "You want to know! _FINE!_ My bond mate was killed on Rannoch during the Geth uprising. My daughters were both killed on the Citadel during Saren and the Geth's attack! So don't you _dare_..."

Shepard cut her off, "What, that's _it?_ You lost your partner and kids to the Geth so you hate everyone?" She shook her head and took a menacing step forward, "My father was assassinated by my girlfriends father. My mother was raped and murdered by Batarian Slavers. I had to watch my friends be raped and have slaver chips shoved into their skulls." Her tone was becoming deeper and darker as she progressed, her eyes becoming bright red murderous globes as she advanced towards Erinya.

Erinya's eyes widened and she began to retreat from the irate human.

"I had to lead a bunch of greenhorn recruits against a Batarian stronghold to free hundreds of people, _Asari included_ from becoming mindless sex toys for the fucking Batarians, after my commanding officer cracked under the pressure and got half of us killed. Then for dealing with those fucking bastards I was called the _Butcher of Torfan. _My entire platoon was wiped out by Thresher Maws and I barely survived myself. I had to leave behind a dear friend to die in a nuclear explosion to stop Saren from unleashing an army of tank bred Krogan along with his Geth. I ordered the strike to protect the Destiny Ascension that cost over three hundred lives and that's something I have to live with every fucking day. So don't _you dare_ think that because you lost your family you have the monopoly on grief, that you can _hate_ everyone else in the galaxy and allow that hate in you to torture _innocent_ people who are just trying to live out their lives in _peace_!" Shepard's voice boomed in the store, reverberating powerfully and was seemingly a crushing weight as Erinya cowered.

"You hate other races when it was fucking _machines, SYNTHETICS_ that killed the people you love. How does that even _work_!" Shepard exclaimed in fierce frustration.

Erinya swallowed, "The Quarian's created the Geth and caused the uprising by attacking them. The Geth that attached the Citadel were led by a Turian, Saren."

Shepard blinked, that she could understand a little more, "So what was your bond mate even _doing_ on Rannoch?" She demanded firmly, not backing away yet.

Erinya began to pace, increasing the distance between herself and the irate Spectre, "Studying their art, their music. She loved music," her voice was soft, saddened at remembering even though it was over three hundred years ago now.

Shepard softened a little in response, "And your daughters? What were they doing on the Citadel?"

"One worked in the Embassy, the other as a greeter for the Consort. They were both so like their father, both loved to meet new people, new races..." her voice trailed off and tears filled her eyes.

"So your bond partner loved other cultures, your children loved other cultures... how do you think they'd feel about you right now with _your _utter hate, disdain and torture for the very ones they loved to be with?" Shepard stood tall and firm, her voice was glacial and merciless in its delivery.

Erinya whirled around to face her with gobsmacked horror etched into her features as that question sunk in.

Shepard said nothing more, she just waited and watched the play of emotions cross that sky blue toned face.

Erinya sobbed and sagged back against the wall, sinking to the ground at the horrifying revelation of what those she loved most would think about her right now and _knowing_ how disappointed and repulsed they'd be.

Shepard waited a moment longer before reigning in her anger, softening her posture and walking over to crouch before she trembling Asari, "You can change that. It probably won't be easy or happen overnight, but _you can change_. Start looking not for the faults in others but for the beauty they can contain. When was the last time you listened to some of the music your love enjoyed?"

Erinya burst into tears, she hadn't listened to anything of her bond mates since she passed into the embrace of the Goddess.

Shepard cringed, she had no idea what to do with tears! But this was an opportunity to really get her point across, while Erinya was in emotional turmoil... she wasn't sure if she should feel bad about this or to simply see this as an opportunity to open the Asari's eyes. With a deep breath she took off her gauntlets and reached up to gently wipe away the tears. Cupping Erinya's face and looking her in the eye she pleaded softly, appealing to her compassion now that the door had been opened, "You have a chance to make a difference in the lives of others. You can _help_ the colonists on Feros in ways I can only dream of doing. My hands are those of a killer, it's the only way I know how to protect others, by getting rid of those who'd do them harm. But if I could exchange them I'd choose the hands of a healer, hands like yours. I wish I could soothe their wounds and broken hearts but that's not my calling. _You_ have that chance, you _can _save them from the suffering they still endure from the Thorian."

Erinya reached up and put her hands over the warm, pale hands of the human woman, Commander Shepard, more tears leaking from her eyes, "There's so much suffering in the universe. How can I continue to add to it?" She took a deep breath, "I'll re-write the contract, I'll do everything in my power to help them. Thank you, thank you for opening my eyes and helping me to see again," she whispered brokenly.

"We're not so bad when you get to know us you know." Shepard smiled and pulled back, standing and offering her hand. Relieved that this seemed to have worked out okay so far.

Erinya took it and was pulled to her shaky feet.

Replacing her gauntlets Shepard watched as Erinya went straight to her console.

"You can tell Shiala I'll have a revised contract to her by tomorrow afternoon."

"Thank you Erinya. I really _am_ sorry for your losses, and I wish you all the best in the future." Shepard nodded her head politely.

Erinya looked up, "Thank you, you as well... Commander Shepard."

Shepard smirked, "Spectre actually, no longer an Alliance Officer." She tapped her fingers to her forehead in a mock salute.

"Spectre Shepard." Erinya bade her farewell to get to work on the contract.

Shepard left the office with a small grin and confident stride.

Shiala had been sitting patiently waiting on a bench overlooking the bustling sky traffic of Illium, meditating to calm her mind while she entrusted the fates of the colonists and herself into the hands of Shepard. She felt someone sit beside her and opened her eyes to see Shepard taking in the view.

"So Erinya's gonna send you a revised contract tomorrow." Shepard kept her gaze out at the view but smirked.

Shiala was filled with such relief that she threw her arms around Shepard and kissed her cheek, "Thank you!"

Shepard blushed and chuckled, "You're welcome Shiala. One thing that's been bothering me though..." she turned to look at Shiala as the Asari pulled back, a joyous smile lighting her green face.

Shiala couldn't wipe that smile from her face and waited for the question.

"Last time you were green I had to kick your ass... repeatedly." Shepard's eyes were a little mischievous but the question was a serious one really.

Shiala sighed, sitting back again, "Those health problems haven't been restricted to the colonists. Since my time with the Thorian I've been having vivid dreams, my biotics have been unstable and my skin tone changed. It... has not been easy to deal with," she admitted softly.

The smile vanished from Shepard's being. She reached over and took hold of Shiala's hand to give it a warm hearted squeeze, "I can't imagine what you've been going through but green or not, you're still beautiful and have an amazing heart to still be helping the colonists after so long." She tried to encourage the Asari who'd been a disciple of Benezia's right up until the end when she'd been sacrificed to the Thorian.

Shiala looked upon the beautiful, young human marine and was deeply touched by her sentiments, "Thank you Shepard."

"Hopefully now that Erinya intends to be much more helpful she'll be able to help you figure it all out." Shepard gave her hand a final squeeze before letting it go.

"How _did_ you get her to change her mind?" Shiala asked curiously.

"Pretty much reminded her that the people she loved had loved other races and would be ashamed of the way she's been behaving." Shepard shrugged like it was no big deal and that she hadn't felt like taking the Asari by the throat and shaking the xenophobia out of her.

"Ah, I see." They sat there for a moment in companionable silence before Shiala spoke again, "How do you do it Shepard? Continue on when the problems of yesterday linger on in new forms?"

Shepard took a deep breath at the softly asked question, "By knowing that I _can_ make a difference. I do my bit and others carry on with their strengths to do what I can't." She turned to look at Shiala, "There will always be suffering but as long as there are people standing up to fight it there will _always_ be hope. You give the colonists hope by even just _trying_ to help them. They know that they're not alone, they're not forgotten, that they _matter_ and it's because you're still there, still will them, still fighting for them as they face new challenges." She reached up and gently cupped Shiala's face, "You can do this," she assured her confidently.

Shiala actually blushed, her cheeks darkening at the praise, "Thank you, I... needed to hear that."

Shepard stood, smiling down at Shiala with a nod.

"You know we should catch up when I'm not busy with the colony and you're not busy doing... whatever it is you do." Shiala smiled a little shyly, cringing as she hadn't even asked Shepard how she was, she'd been so distraught over the situation with the colonists it hadn't even crossed her mind until now.

Shepard grinned, "I'd like that. I don't know how much longer I'll be on Illium but let me know if you have a free afternoon or something." She flicked on her omni-tool and they exchanged codes.

"Until then, be safe Shepard." Shiala rose to her feet and bid farewell to the woman who had given her a future and hope with a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"You too." Shepard was unaware at this point in time that Miranda was very _unimpressed_ with her having started to keep an eye on her through the armours camera after her outburst of anger...

* * *

><p><em><strong>He he he... fun times for Seph when she gets back to the Normandy!<strong>_

_**Thanks to everyone who has put in reviews! From my glorious bunch who have faithfully been reviewing for some time now (NightBrainzz, Gemini1179, Cambia Forma, LeeneSR2, Liege Lord, Bluemarlin, Tiaxelto, Ily18, Surfergirl3537, Hopelessly Blue, Sarah Andr3ws, Kaiya Smith, Losa136, yog (where u been lately?), gosh there's so many of you guys and I'm sure there's more I've forgotten) to people who are only just discovering this story and starting to drop in reviews. To all of you, you have my thanks, you make my day and make it so much more enjoyable to post stories and inspire me to keep writing!**_

_**Also big thanks to a few people I've been pestering and sending snippets of all kinds to: Cambia Forma/theshepardtwins, Madkatxpress and Gemini1179, been loving your input!**_

_**Lastly if you're interested in Star Wars let me know what you think of a new story I've started posting: Dancing in Shadows. (I'll put in here I was totally inspired to write this after reading Elizabeth Carter's 'Knights of the Old Republic: Jedi Secrets' she's done an awesome job, go read em if you're a Star Wars fan and don't mind reading a little femRev/Bastila romance!)**_

_**Hope you enjoyed! ^_^**_

_**[Apologies for the repost, few typos picked up and thanks to Gemini who pointed out I had my Asari names mixed up! Enyala, Erinya... I was close!]  
><strong>_


	37. Facing down the Justicar

Finally finding her way through the air traffic, having dodged some crazy ass impatient drivers in what appeared to be the peak hour rush Shepard pulled up at the car port closest to Precinct 4-14. She took a moment to calm herself having been sorely tempted to shoot a couple drivers who'd nearly run her into oncoming traffic. If she'd been in a Mako those idiots would have been screwed for sure, there'd have been no need for her to whip out the infamous death glare because she _would_ have just rolled right on over them, several times in fact. After all Shepard _was_ rather notorious for hitting everything in sight in the armoured tank and Garrus had enjoyed re-calibrating it after they'd taken it out for a spin.

That thought had Shepard smirking. Garrus certainly spent a lot of time calibrating things, she'd found him on numerous occasions in the forward batteries fiddling around with the big guns of the Normandy. But if he could get them working even better than the Cerberus standard she was so not going to complain.

Thinking of improving things from the stock standard, as much as anything was stock standard on a prototype stealth frigate, thoughts of upgrading other things came to mind. The Normandy SR-2 was based on the old Normandy SR-1, the one that'd been blown out of space by an unknown ship that cut through the Normandy's barriers and hull like a hot knife through butter. That was a bit over two years ago now and Cerberus had used the _same_ barriers and hull plating as the SR-1. Surely there'd be better quality gear available now. She'd speak to Miranda about it, see what the resourceful and well connected operative could get her hands on... other than on one utterly smitten Commander Shepard.

Shepard smirked at _that _thought and finally got out of the air car, her brain having wandered in enough various directions that she'd calmed from the insane traffic.

Striding towards the station she noticed that a few people around the area were looking... less than pleased, quite anxious and flighty upon closer inspection. This was more of a warehouse district from the looks of things, lots of blocky buildings and storage crates rather than the sleek lines of the financial or residential districts. In fact there were not many people around this time of day as they'd mostly gone home from work, only a few people lingered.

One particular small group consisting of a Volus with what seemed like two Turian guards were looking decidedly nervous, at least as far as she could tell with the Volus shifting in what she interpreted as a nervous manner, while an Asari officer read them the riot act over something, over what Shepard didn't particularly care.

This particular precinct seemed rather busy considering how quiet it appeared outside. A good dozen Asari officers were sequestered away at their different consoles several speaking animatedly on their communicators, most looking harried and in a state of becoming increasingly pissed off. Listening to some of the conversations she figured out it was because one of the warehouse districts was an Eclipse base. Not just any base but a bit like the head office in terms of the merc bands presence on Illium.

Shepard sighed in dismay at that revelation. She couldn't see anyone who was in a position to talk to or ask questions of, there was no receptionist to give direction either. So when the officer from outside strode in she cleared her throat, "Excuse me officer, may I have a moment of your time please?"

The officer glanced at her, taking in her sophisticated armour and weapons, "Nice guns, try not to use them in my district though." She nodded and motioned for the human stranger to follow her.

Shepard smirked, she had her customary pistols as well as the prototype ARC projector Cerberus was developing. There was no call for the Cain in residential districts where the massive firepower could harm civilians and the ARC let loose a barrage of electricity like a lightning bolt that bounced around the targets in close proximity to whatever unlucky bastard she was frying but no high powered explosive destruction was usually left in its wake... though Shepard hadn't had the chance to properly test it out... in her hands that could alter, knowing how things tended to explode around her when the shooting started. "No one shoots at me, I won't have to shoot them back," she assured the officer calmly.

"Huh, that's not as encouraging as you might think," the Detective gave a wry little laugh, leading the woman over to her desk, "I'm Detective Anaya, what's the problem today?" She introduced herself with a hint of tiredness in her tone that declared she really didn't have the time or patience for anything major.

"Shepard, Spectre." Shepard introduced herself right off the bat and was rewarded with a swift re-appraisal.

"I thought Commander Shepard was dead," Anaya mused thoughtfully, a little more energy back in her voice.

"So I keep getting told. Look I can see you're busy so I won't take up much of your time. I'm looking for Justicar Samara." She held up her hand as Anaya went to speak, "Yes I know pissing her off is a really bad idea, no I'm not here cos she's killed someone."

Anaya smirked, "Been getting the instant nervous responses huh. Well can you seriously blame us? Someone even offers her a bribe and her Code demands she kills them and in this district it's only a matter of time before that happens. Then poof, intergalactic diplomacy issues. Seriously it's a damn sight easier when they just remain in Asari space," she groused and shook her head before returning her gaze to Commander Shepard's dark brown eyes.

"I really don't envy you, which is why this is going to sound strange." Shepard stood a little straighter and braced herself, "I'm on a critical mission and I need her help. I'm assembling a squad of the best in the galaxies to take down the Collectors for their abductions of hundreds of thousands of human colonists. She's on my list," she gave it to the Detective point blank as she could see this Asari was a no fuss kind of officer.

Anaya's painted brows rose, "Well Justicars _are_ drawn to impossible odds," she mused thoughtfully. She leaned forward and placed her elbows on her desk as the different ramifications rolled through her mind but first and foremost was the answer to one rather large problem she faced, "Look if it gets her out of my district I'll do everything I can to help."

Shepard's eyes narrowed marginally, that was quick, a little _too_ quick.

"There was a murder in the back alley's behind the Eclipse warehouses, a Volus by the name of Dakni Kur. Justicar Samara offered to assist in the investigation and who am I to decline the offer."

"You're letting her take over your investigation?" Shepard asked curiously.

"She's been doing this longer than both our lives put together, saying no would have just been plain stupid," Anaya scoffed, sitting back in her chair and continuing to analyse the famous Spectre standing before her. She could never have imagined facing two such powerful individuals in a matter of days.

Shepard merely inclined her head for the Detective to continue.

"I'm keeping Dakni Kur's business partner, Pitne For, close at hand until we can determine he wasn't involved, business partners can turn sour after all and he has motive. However, there's no evidence to suggest he did it at this point in time hence Justicar Samara is investigating." Anaya gave the quick rundown on the events she was aware of at this point in time. "Samara's at the crime scene right now, I'll call ahead and let the officers on duty know to let you in."

Now it was Shepard's turn to be rather suspicious, "You seem awfully eager to help."

"Hey if you get her out of my district you make my life a whole lot happier and longer. I've just been ordered to detain her before she causes an incident." Anaya shook her head in disgust, "I don't know what she's doing here but I know if I detain her she'll more than likely kill me to continue her mission."

"And your superiors know this?" Shepard's brow rose in surprise.

"Of course they do, I'm just the grunt they want to carry it out while they sit in their comfy offices quivering in their boots at just the mere _mention_ of a Justicar on Illium," the disgust that rang through Anaya's tone was a clear indicator that she was not at all pleased with this situation and frankly, who would be?

"That's ridiculous! Making you comply with an order that would mean certain death." Shepard paused as she considered that, she was recruiting people to join her on a mission that would most likely mean certain death at this point in time. She shook her head, she wouldn't let that happen.

"I'll lose my job if I don't, which is why I'm all for you getting her off of Illium." Anaya shrugged, trying to keep herself relaxed with all the shit that was going on right now.

Shepard gave a soft laugh, "So no hints as to how I'm supposed to keep her from massacring my team? I've got a couple Cerberus operatives, a master thief, a psychotic biotic badass who never made it out of her rebellious teens and I'm also looking for an assassin."

Anaya's brows shot up, "And you seriously _want_ her on your team? Are you crazy?"

Shepard grinned, "Certifiably so."

"Your funeral honey, I really got no idea how to help with that one." Anaya sent her the address for the crime scene, "Watch your ass in those alley's, it's Eclipse turf and they're not welcoming of strangers, especially of the Spectre variety. I don't want a dead Spectre on my watch."

Shepard smirked, "Me either, why do you think I carry my guns everywhere?"

"Well good luck Shepard." Anaya meant it quite sincerely, both in Shepard reaching the Justicar and convincing her to join her mission.

"Thanks for the help, I'll do my best." Shepard looked over the directions to the crime scene quickly, it wasn't too far away but it would take a good ten to fifteen minutes on foot which would be the better approach in keeping a low profile.

Anaya watched the supposedly dead Spectre leave the precinct office and wondered how soon it would be before that belief became a reality. Then again she wouldn't _be_ a Spectre if she couldn't handle herself.

xxx

Shepard followed the directions on the omni-tool and was led to an alley that was cordoned off by the police with two Asari officers standing guard.

One of them recognized Shepard instantly, "Ah Spectre, we've been expecting you. Detective Anaya cleared you to enter the scene. Just... watch yourself, there's been Eclipse activity in these alley's." She thumbed over her shoulder to the darkened corridor behind her.

"Thanks for the heads up." Shepard nodded brusquely and strode through the holographic police cordon without a second glance at the officers. From here on in she stuck to the shadows, grateful for her mostly black armour. It wasn't that she was seeking to avoid confrontation if it was required, but rather she'd prefer to get the drop on whatever Eclipse mercs might pose an annoyance between her and her target.

It wasn't long before she came to where the crime scene was actually located. However, there were numerous mercs and mechs visible but no Justicar. She could hear the leader of this little group of mercs yelling out to her team that another unit had gone in and they'd lost contact with them. Glancing around for where 'gone in' might refer to she noted their attention was on a doorway to the left, perhaps an office space for the warehouses they were currently walking between?

Sneaking up on them she spared a thought for Tali, wishing the spunky little Quarian was there to hack those mechs and set them against their owners.

Shepard paused for a moment as she analysed that thought. Tali _had_ shown her some tricks when it came to dealing with geth, perhaps they'd work on these mechs too? Glancing down at her omni-tool she shook her head, she didn't have the right software currently and it'd take too long.

Instead she whipped out both pistols and simply opened fire without warning taking the mercs completely by surprise. One of the yellow clad asari went down quickly, two highly powered pistols gunning for her head ripped through her weak barriers in moments.

Ducking behind a crate to avoid a burning ball of blue energy that her barriers _could_ have deflected quite easily Shepard picked out her next target. The mechs weren't of much consequence at this point in time as they were still processing the new threat and turning around. But getting rid of them before they became a nuisance would be helpful.

Snapping out her hand she sent a powerful throw that picked up the closest mech and _slammed_ it into the wall with such force it was an explosion of mechanical parts.

The mercs swore, still no idea who they were up against or how many they were facing. The Justicar was supposed to be _inside_ not _behind _them. Quickly gathering their wits about them they dove for cover behind the crates.

"Where is the bitch!"

"I can't see anyone!"

While the mercs were shouting at each other in confusion Shepard threw another mech with her biotics, straight into the cover one of the Asari had hidden behind. The screams told her the mechs explosion had struck home and she followed it up quickly charging towards her prey with pistols blazing.

Now in the midst of the remaining three mercs Shepard's biotics were blazing. One merc she hit with a warp, shredding through her barrier with ease to put a bullet between her eyes. The second she fired at in a continual stream with her left hand reducing her shields to nothing in heartbeats until her head snapped back in a spray of blood. The final merc saw her sisters fall within moments of the attacker appearing and fearfully ducked behind a crate.

Shepard turned to the crate and smirked. Holding out her hand she lifted the entire thing to reveal the terrified merc crouched behind it.

At first the merc didn't respond. She wasn't leaning against the crate and was so caught up in her thoughts of how the fuck she was going to get out of this she didn't notice her cover was gone.

Shepard momentarily considered her options as she looked at the crouching merc. Killing her like this seemed a little cold. Letting the merc go would give her the opportunity to warn the rest of the Eclipse mercs. Shepard sighed and dropped the massive, heavy crate on top of the still unsuspecting merc.

Death was quick, almost instantaneous as the Asari was crushed by both the crate and the biotic force that was exerted on it.

All Eclipse mercs down Shepard sauntered up to the office and strode inside just in time to see an Eclipse merc go flying through the air to smack into the wall, her head snapping back and splitting open her skull on impact. A moment later another was thrown through the glass of the actual office within this smaller storage space, a small platform up on the right.

The asari hit the ground still breathing, looking up fearfully as another Asari stepped into view.

This one was clad in a skin tight red suit that had a very low neckline, in fact it dipped between those blue breasts to her _navel_. What was it with matriarch's and showing off their breasts? And they wondered why males from other species drooled over them so. The collar was high and solid looking, appearing like it was supposed to protect the back of her neck from sniper fire in addition to the thick golden brace around her neck that had intricate carvings decorating it.

Shepard watched as a biotic corona surrounded the Justicar and she lightly floated down from on high like some avenging angel of death. She said nothing to make her presence known just yet, not thinking it wise to surprise said avenging angel of death.

The Justicar strode up to the merc who was trying to crawl back and out of reach without success as a heeled boot came down firmly on the unarmed mercs throat. "You have two choices. To give me the information I seek, or pay for your silence on the matter with your life."

"Screw you bitch! Do you have any idea what she could do to me if I told you that?" The merc snarled up at her, too afraid of whomever she was protecting to divulge the information the Justicar sought.

The Justicar bowed her head momentarily, "Find peace in the embrace of the Goddess." Were her final words before she pushed down hard and twisted, killing the merc quickly.

Movement behind her caught Shepard's attention. In a flash she whipped out her pistol and shot the merc trying to creep up on the Justicar.

The Justicar's barrier flared to life and she lashed out with her hand.

Shepard grunted, putting up her own barriers quick smart and just in time before she slammed into the wall with such force she would have met the same fate as the merc from before.

Seeing her quarry still alive, and quite frankly a little impressed, Samara went to attack her again.

Shepard strengthened her barriers and took another shot, this time killing the merc whose shields had gone down in the initial hits.

Samara frowned as the shot went wide of her, too wide in fact to have actually been aimed at her. Turning to glance over her shoulder she watched as a merc slumped to the ground.

"You're welcome," Shepard drawled with a touch of sarcasm. A little annoyed but it was an understandable response from the lone warrior given the circumstances.

Samara considered the human woman coolly and purposefully chose not to thank her as the sarcasm indicated the human wanted, "I see a well armed human who does not bear the uniform of Eclipse neither do you wish to engage me in battle it seems. What is your purpose?"

"Straight to business then." Shepard clipped her pistols back on her hips, well aware that she was being scrutinized by the matriarch, and met her piercing blue eyes calmly, "I'm Stephanie Shepard, Special Tactics and Reconnaissance. I'm on a critical mission and I'm putting together a team of the best, you're on my list." Shepard flashed her a brief smirk and nod.

There was a slight narrowing of those intense blue eyes, "I sense you speak the truth. However, I am on the hunt for a dangerous criminal."

"An ardat yakshi. I'm aware of that, I understand it's important to track her down," Shepard continued quickly at the subtle shift of surprise in the powerful Asari before her, "I have considerable resources who're good at tracking things, if you help me I'm willing to help you."

Samara was quiet for a long moment and Shepard wasn't sure if she'd managed to convince the Asari or put her off somehow as she wasn't giving anything away in her demeanour.

"The fact that you have found me and are aware of my hunt shows that you do have a considerable source of information. However, I have managed to track the criminal to these Eclipse Sisters, if I lose her trail now I may not be able to pick it up again." Samara gestured to the body at her feet in a graceful motion.

It took a bit for Shepard to hold her tongue from pointing out that killing them would clearly not obtain the information Samara sought instead she offered, "Well then, I'll help, it's apparently what I do. She's not gonna give you anything now so what else do you have?" She nodded to the dead merc.

"Eclipse smuggled her off world, I need the name of the ship they used. However, gaining entrance into their base is no mean feat. My next course of action was to speak with the Volus Pitne For. He has had dealings with Eclipse, dealings it is my understanding that went sour hence Eclipse had his business partner murdered. I shall wait for your results at the police precinct." Samara bowed her head politely.

"What, not gonna help?" Shepard's brow rose.

"We are at a disadvantage, you know of me, however, I know little of you Spectre. Consider this a test to allow me to determine your worth." Samara's stoic expression did not alter in the slightest remaining detached and dispassionate as she spoke in a similarly detached tone of voice.

Shepard took a deep breath to cool herself off from instantly spouting off the _many_ things she'd done that _proved_ she was a worthy leader. "Then while you're at the precinct you can do a bit of a background check into my history. Also perhaps look into the Collectors and the recent abductions of human colonists. If you need a decent source of information give Liara T'Soni a call, she's an information broker who can assist you, Detective Anaya would most likely be happy to help you." Shepard held up her hand at the subtle shift in the Asari's features, "I'm only suggesting it so you can get a better understanding of who I am and a small taste of what I'm up against. It's entirely up to you I meant no offense."

Samara inclined her head in understanding at the rather impertinent human as the suggestion was something she would have been looking into anyway, in regards to finding out more about this human Spectre. It was quite surprising to her that there even _was_ a human Spectre already, they'd only been within the galactic community for barely thirty years. Then again, from what she'd researched on the newly discovered humans that did fit their drive for success and power. She had made it a point to study them with having to branch out of Asari space in the hunt for her quarry and it would be very interesting for her to actually interact and potentially work with a human.

Shepard hesitated for a moment, Pitne For would undoubtedly be back in the precinct area especially if his partner had been murdered. Perhaps he was the Volus with the Turian security? However, that wasn't the reason for her hesitation. She hesitated in knowing whether to walk back with the Justicar or not.

"We shall speak more upon your return to the precinct." Samara moved with power and grace as she strode towards the door.

Shepard sighed, that answered her question. They were making their own ways back.

XXX

Upon returning to the precinct area Shepard approached the Volus she assumed to be Pitne For.

The Turian's shifted to a more discernable defensive position at the approach of the armed human but didn't make any threatening moves just yet.

The heavy sounds of the Volus breathing apparatus filled the air as the Volus looked up at the much taller human, only reaching her waist after all. "Ah, a human, what do you want human?" came the immediate and plainly bored tone of the Volus.

"Pitne For, I presume?" Shepard was in her command mode and came across with firm authority.

"And who might you be?" The Volus didn't answer just yet, his voice very wary now.

"I have a few questions about your dealings with Eclipse, I don't care what you were doing, I just need to know how to get into their base," she asserted quickly, knowing he was hardly about to fess up to anything illegal.

"Hmph, touché would be the apt human term would it not?" the Volus grumped at her not answering his question either.

"It's Shepard, Spectre. You either deal with me or the Justicar and given that you're dealing with Eclipse the Justicar would no doubt kill you on sight so it's in your best interest to answer my questions," Shepard put in the hard word and saw all three before her shiver just at the mention of being in close proximity to the Justicar.

"In that case, yes I am Pitne For and yes I _have_ had dealings with Eclipse," Pitne admitted rather begrudgingly as he was well aware it was as the Spectre had said and in his best interest to _not_ have anything to do with the Justicar.

Shepard said nothing but waited expectantly, her gaze boring into the Volus's suit.

"Minagen X3. A new and very experimental drug designed to boost biotics." Pitne fiddled with his fingers as he gave the explanation as though that answered everything.

Shepard's brow rose slightly as that told her very little in fact.

Seeing the human didn't make the connection Pitne huffed, "Never heard of it before human?"

"Can't say that I'm up with the recent designer drugs no." Shepard shook her head.

"Well Eclipse was very interested in it for the biotic enhancement, however, I may have... failed to mention the side effects of overuse or overdosing. Short of it is it makes the user lose their mind, burns out their neural pathways. They were... not happy when they discovered it for themselves." He shifted his weight from foot to foot uncomfortably.

"Ah, hence they killed your business partner. This helps me get in how?" While it was interesting Shepard didn't particularly care, she wasn't a cop, never had been and she had bigger fish to fry than this stupid and greedy Volus.

"Because of the trading I was given an access card. Of course I had to return it..." his pause indicated there was something else.

Shepard slowly smiled and held out her hand, "Hand it over and I won't mention the truth of your business transaction to the Justicar. Hell I'll even make life miserable for the Eclipse."

Pitne produced a card, "You are correct, I did make a copy and that sounds like an excellent deal."

"So this Minagen, how much do they have? Should I be expecting juiced up biotics in there?" Shepard pocketed the card in a storage compartment in her armour.

"I don't know, they would most likely be very wary of using it given the side effects. How much... four GSTU's in sealed packages containing two hundred doses each."

Shepard's jaw just about dropped and her eyes widened, "Four... shit. No wonder they're pissed off."

Galactic Standard Trading Units equated to roughly three quarters of a tonne by human standards so there was over three tonnes of the biotic enhancing, brain frying chemical currently in Eclipse hands and stored... where exactly Shepard wasn't sure.

"Tell me it's not all at their HQ," she groaned at the thought.

"Not all of it, though more than likely half of it is located there." Pitne admitted and smirked behind his masked suit.

"Great. This is going to be _fantastic_ fun. Try and stay out of trouble while the Justicar's around, she doesn't seem to be the type to let things _slide_." Shepard warned him with a nod and wry smirk adorning her lips.

"I am keeping that firmly in mind. Good luck Spectre." Pitne bowed his head almost respectfully.

Shepard returned the almost respectful gesture with a curt nod before turning and quickly heading towards the waiting taxi cabs in the nearby parking lot as the base was too far too walk to. Did she have time to call for reinforcements? No. Thanks to Samara's efforts to gain the information Eclipse would be on alert and calling in the troops.

However, she _did_ have a handy AI available...

"EDI, busy at the moment?" Shepard asked her AI then shook her head at having asked such a stupid question.

"_My processing capacity is currently not overly tasked,_" came the somewhat amused and curious response from the AI.

"Good, I need to infiltrate an Eclipse base to locate the name of the ship the ardat yakshi the Justicar is after has left on."

"_I shall alert Operative Lawson you require..."_ EDI began but was cut off by the Spectre.

"It's you and me EDI," as Shepard said this a thought occurred to her... why the hell hadn't she gone to EDI first to hack into Eclipse's systems to override their base security? On that note could the AI hack their manifests so she didn't even have to infiltrate the base? Or would that be considered cheating Samara's test... She frowned at that thought. It felt like cheating. She wanted to _prove_ herself and asking an AI to just download the data didn't feel like she showed anything of her own capabilities to the Justicar. She also might not have been made aware of the hazardous chemical Eclipse had stored in massive quantities that could prove to be quite problematic to her.

There was a pause from the AI, "_What would you have me do Spectre?"_

"First thing I need you to do is check to see if Eclipse called in for reinforcements at their main HQ." Shepard was climbing into her taxi cab, the base was too far away to walk and get there in a decent time frame given how much time she'd already wasted walking on foot to the crime scene and back. There just hadn't been any place to get a taxi between the scene and the precinct though and running would have drawn attention she didn't need right now.

"_Searching._" There was a pause as EDI had to locate the Eclipse HQ, then hack into their communication network and sort through the outgoing calls to locate any such attempt that might have been made. For a human this would have taken a good half hour or so to hack into the heavily encrypted network, the AI, however, had little difficulty with this.

Shepard was driving quickly, ducking and weaving through the traffic with a whole lot more gusto this second time around. It was _her_ turn to be the recipient of annoyed horns but she didn't give a shit as time was crucial right now.

"_I have access to their communications network. An automated emergency recall was put out to all Eclipse members in the local districts seven minutes ago._" EDI reported.

"Automated huh. Can you put out the automated 'never mind' notice?" Shepard mused thoughtfully.

EDI had to translate that before responding, "_Cancelling the automated recall and advising situation is all clear._"

"Excellent, a few of the dedicated ones will most likely still come in to find out what happened but that should keep most of them out of the way." Shepard nodded, pleased with the AI. She couldn't have EDI cut their communications altogether just yet as that would definitely alert them to something being wrong. "I'd like a layout of the base, a rough idea of hostile numbers to expect, what mechs they might have, security system's I'll have to deal with, names and faces of important individuals I might encounter and if they're known for their biotics. This Minagen X3 drug could really ruin my day," Shepard finished with a sigh.

"_I shall begin investigating immediately,_" EDI responded with a touch of eager anticipation actually colouring her tone at the fact that Shepard was asking for her assistance as though she was in fact a member of the crew and not simply an advanced VI like the rest of the Normandy's crew, bar Joker, treated her as.

By the time Shepard reached the base she had a great deal of information and took a couple minutes to run over it in the taxi, memorizing some faces of key individuals to avoid or shoot on sight as well as the best possible route to the main office where sensitive information would be held. It was going to take a bit of fancy footwork to get there without detection as secrecy was going to be her best weapon here.

"EDI this is great, thanks," Shepard's voice came off as a little distracted as she was pouring through the intel EDI had dug up in such short order.

"_I always work at optimal capacity,_" there was no hiding the smile in the AI's tone.

Shepard grinned, "You'll let me know if there's anything you want upgraded right? I want you at your best and brightest possible capacity for when we do hit the Collectors."

There was a pause, then in a hesitant tone EDI ventured, "_You are unsatisfied with my current capacity?"_

"Not at all EDI, in fact I'm very impressed. I just thought I'd put the thought out there for you to consider as I'm going to be asking all my ground team what they'll need to be at their best. You might be an AI but I consider you a part of my crew EDI, and you're proving right now that _you_ are not confined to the Normandy even if your servers are physically located there." She didn't have time or the mental space to go deeper into this particular topic with the AI given she was about to embark on a dangerous solo assignment. While EDI would be an incredible asset she wasn't another body or gun to help against hostiles, it would be all up to Shepard...

"_Thank you Shepard._" EDI didn't quite know how to articulate the right kind of response to that, emotions were things she just didn't understand properly just yet though she was trying. She had a growing understanding of them as she watched the crew but she wasn't programmed with them as such, she was _developing_ them as she learned and grew closer with _her_ crew, especially with Persephone Calleyuss known more widely as Stephanie Shepard.

"Welcome. Now then, just putting out a blanket shut down of their security systems will immediately get them up in arms. So what I want you to do is make me a ghost and advise me if I'm about to walk into a room full of mercs or something." Shepard got out of the taxi with a plan already forming in her mind, a plan that involved sneaking and entering and nothing blowing up.

In hindsight Shepard really should have known better.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Oh yes I'm leaving it here! I'm so mean aren't I! Then again you've been waiting for the longest EVER and while I am back on writing - after taking a somewhat stress filled break and hiatus from the internet for varying reasons... I was going to keep the Samara mission altogether but haven't finished writing it so I'm splitting it in two and this was the best place to do that. <strong>_

_**Thoughts on a Shepard and EDI mission?**_

_**Now I know that many of you are playing ME3 so will be highly distracted... I will be joining you in a couple weeks time when I get my copy... for now I happy with quick reviews... button's right there... you know you want you to! (Okay so maybe more like 'you know I want you to' XD)**_

_**OH and I got SWTOR today! Finally! Whoot! Got so excited... installed it... signed up on all the dotted lines... and it won't let me download the patch for it therefore it won't play... *sobs* **_

___**Edit: Seeing as I took out the Interlude as I said I would, anyone who commented on it won't be able to put in a review on chapter 37. You can either pick a chapter you didn't review to review from, send me a PM or wait until I post up the next chapter! Sorry about that, I'd still really love to hear from you!  
><strong>_


	38. Beast Knows Beast

_**Quietly sneaks this on and vanishes back into the ether.**_

* * *

><p>As soon as Shepard opened the door to the Eclipse base a mech powered up right in front of her. Instinctively she whipped out her pistol and three rather loud reports sounded before the mech's head exploded and it crashed back to the ground.<p>

EDI was quick to stifle the alarm, in fact it didn't even have a chance at all to _think_ about sounding with the AI blanketing the internal security systems.

Shepard hesitated, listening for any sound of another response. She cringed at the shouts she could hear faintly through the door to her left. Silently cursing herself for not just getting EDI to hack the bloody mech she jogged over to the door.

"_Shepard, six mercenaries and four LOKI mechs have been alerted to your presence. I have cut off their communication and silenced the alarm,_" EDI informed Shepard calmly.

"Thanks EDI, can you hack the mechs?" Shepard murmured, keeping her voice down for the time being. Ten to one were not favourable odds. She was good but she was also not the raging beast she was when Miri had been in danger and therefore more wary and cautious in her approach, especially with the threat of Minagen being let loose while she was without helmet.

"_Certainly._"

A moment later gunfire ripped through the quietness followed by screams and shouts of surprise.

Shepard took advantage of the confusion to slip through the door and dashed across the open ground to take cover behind some storage crates. Quickly scanning the scene unfolding she found herself on a small loading platform for smaller transports where it looked like nothing much bigger than a gunship could fit in here and there was quite a number of crates being prepped for transport.

Two mechs that had been moving crates with an Asari merc overseeing them had taken the Asari by complete surprise and her crumpled body still had small tendrils of smoke from where bullets had riddled through her armour. The mechs were now advancing on a group of three mercs who were caught between them and another pair of mechs that had been working the other platform.

A couple of the mercs had clearly been hit before they'd put up their barriers, they were all Asari and biotic afterall. The initial confusion was beginning to abate though and one of the mechs was shot down by a combined biotic attack.

Shepard had to move fast. First thing was to bring down those barriers.

XXX

This infiltration mission had been going rather well so far. Shepard's natural ability to move almost silently even in her armour really came into play as she crept passed Eclipse mercs who were loading crates that most likely contained the Minagen X3 into shipping containers. Shepard's skin tingled at the many, many crates of Minagen that lined the halls and every available storage space and she hoped the tingling was only a mental thing. Perhaps a hyper awareness of what was inside those storage containers and what it could do to her if one of them was cracked open in a fire fight.

EDI was making Shepard invisible to the security system, the motion detectors hadn't sensed her entry, the cameras were not seeing her black clad form sneaking through the initial warehouse. Shepard had even made her way into the second warehouse that served as more of a hangar that housed a good half dozen gunships without discovery.

The hangar was filled to the brim with crates of Minagen X3. Just what did Eclipse plan to _do_ with so much of the drug? How in the hell had Pitne For managed to get his hands on all of this if it was an _experimental drug_ still in development? Shepard scowled as she considered that thought momentarily but she couldn't allow herself to be distracted.

Currently she was crossing over a bridge that was above the automated delivery system that delivered crates from what Shepard assumed was a main storage area to here where they could be loaded into appropriate transportation. It was actually quite busy at the moment as Eclipse seemed to be in a hurry to get the Minagen X3 loaded and shipped out somewhere. This concerned Shepard but it was not why she was here. If she could get some intel while she was raiding the office for the police to investigate she'd gladly hand it over.

A concerned EDI snapped Shepard out of her dangerous musings, "_Hostiles approaching from either side of the bridge._"

Shepard mentally cursed. She had nowhere to go! There was _nothing_ to hide behind and she had no stealth net to turn invisible! Looking around quickly she did the first thing that came to mind. She jumped over the rail. Knowing that the Asari would be able to feel biotics being activated she did nothing to cushion her fall other than to roll when she hit the deck, her reinforced skeletal system handling the fall with a little jarring but nothing significant.

Unfortunately she rolled right into a merc who squealed in surprise as something bowled her over and somehow ended up on top of her. That something turned out to be a _someone_, a _human_ someone who looked just as surprised.

Shepard internally winced and managed a hesitant smile, "Uh you couldn't keep this between us could you gorgeous?"

"Get off me! Intruder! INTRUDER!" The Asari lit up her biotics to throw the human off her.

Shepard groaned as the Asari cried out her warning, "Figured." With that she snapped her hands to the mercs head and twisted sharply.

The merc went silent but others had heard.

Shepard was on her feet in a flash and took off at a sprint, "EDI kill the alarms and put the hangar security vids on a repeating loop, see if we can contain this long enough for me to get out of here without every merc on base coming at me."

"_Complying._"

The idea of trying to recover her stealth position was totally blown when the mercs up on the bridge spotted her and opened fire. Their guns roaring to life and those who'd only been a little alarmed at the warning cry now didn't hesitate in going for their weapons. Her shields took a couple hits before she managed to throw herself behind the cover of a shipping crate.

Weaving through the crates she didn't pause to take stock of how many mercs were closing in on her but she did need to contain the situation before they could get reinforcements. The gunfire had stopped, simply because their quarry was out of sight, but the shouts as the mercs rallied and sought her out bounced around the crates and walls.

Peeking out from behind a stack of Minagen crates she saw a pair of mercs up on the bridge and they had an excellent view of the warehouse from where they were. They'd need to be dealt with before she could break from cover. Charging up her biotics Shepard reached out and caught both mercs in a powerful singularity then before the swirling vortex of dark energy could collapse she ripped it apart with a warp that sent both mercs hurtling through the air from the biotic explosion. It also had all of the mercs turn their attention away from the crates for a moment.

Taking a big risk Shepard bolted from the cover of the Minagen crates and made for the exit. Not missing a stride she reached out for one merc who was taking cover behind a hastily erected barrier of empty crates and wrapped her in dark energy.

The merc dropped her gun, her eyes going wide as she was suddenly lifted from the ground. Then her stomach was left behind somewhere as she hurtled back towards the ground and her world went black with a sickening crunch.

Shepard smirked a little and thanked Miranda for that little move once again. The smile was quickly gone as she dropped and rolled under a crate of Minagen that was hurled at her head from off to her right somewhere. Barely missing a beat she was still in motion and dodged a second crate that flew at her a moment later. With her attention now to her right trying to locate the merc throwing things at her she didn't notice at first that the other yellow clad Asari by the exit she was aiming for had a present for her.

It was only her insane reflexes that saved Shepard from copping a crate to the chest, instead it struck her on the shoulder which threw her completely off balance so that when the _next_ crate came from behind in caught her squarely between the shoulders. The force of the hit threw her forward and knocked the wind out of her. Reddish dust exploded from the broken container and encompassed her in a cloud of Minagen. She heard another couple crates get thrown around causing the cloud to grow and swirl around her, blocking out the rest of the world.

Her heart was pounding and the chemical particles that got up her nose caused her to sneeze which then started a coughing fit as she breathed in the Minagen involuntarily. Reflexively she put up her barrier which blocked out the incoming gunfire as the Eclipse mercs fired blindly into the red haze that surrounded her. Her eyes watered, her lungs burned, she could _feel_ it seeping through her skin.

When the coughing fit of the female intruder stopped the mercs that had gathered around the scene cautiously ceased fire but their weapons remained pointed into the red haze.

"Did we get the bitch?"

"Why don't you go in and find out?"

"Anyone get an ID?"

"We lose anyone?"

"What the _hell_ is that?"

All eyes widened at the pulsing glow that accompanied a sudden powerful drawing of dark energy. A feminine voice that was husky and empowered by something otherworldly resonated around them.

"Do you know what happens when you supercharge the biotics of an already powerful biotic?"

A couple of the Asari started backing up.

"You make her a biotic _goddess," _the voice snarled then unleashed a powerful shockwave that exploded in all directions bowling over all the mercs and clearing all of the red haze from the area. In its place stood a woman whose biotic aura was blinding to behold... not that any of the mercs in the vicinity noticed as most were either out cold or had been killed on impact as their bodies had been thrown like dolls into walls and solid containers and other debris.

Unsteady on her feet Shepard crouched where she was. It felt like she was burning up, the dark energy nodes throughout her nervous system were so over stimulated by the drug overdose she could _feel_ the dark energy pulsing as though it was flowing through her very veins. More than that, she could feel the energy of the world around her so much more intimately, as though her mind itself had expanded beyond her physiology's limitations.

Stowing away the pain Shepard couldn't help but embrace the power that was flowing around her, harnessing it and in the back of her mind wondering if it was a really bad idea. Opening her eyes she found that her biotic vision was tinged with red and that she was unable to bring back her normal vision. The biotic power that was coursing through her was just too strong and overwhelmed the rest of her senses.

Hearing running feet Shepard cocked her head slightly at the familiar feel to the energy approaching and recognized the shimmering blue aura of Garrus and the breathtaking silver aura of Miranda.

"Stephanie!" Miranda gasped in shock at the very unstable woman who looked completely stunned and covered from head to toe in a rusty red coloured dust.

"Miri? Garrus? What are you doing here?" Shepard shook herself and started sneezing as that unsettled the dust around her nose.

"Couldn't let you have _all_ the fun Shepard," Garrus smirked.

Miranda had out her omni-tool and was scanning Shepard quickly, her eyes widening at the readings that were coming back.

"Analyze it later Miri, we've gotta go." Shepard took off a dust covered gauntlet and tried to dust off some of the drug from her face which managed only to make her sneezing worse until Garrus stepped in.

"Here," Garrus chuckled and emptied his water flask on her face.

Shepard gasped and nearly choked on a mouthful of the cool liquid but it stopped the sneezing, "Gee thanks Garrus," she drawled as her hand came away from her face _muddy._

"Any time Shepard," he nodded, his mandibles wide in a smirk as he capped the flask.

"_Shepard you have hostiles approaching, I recommend continuing on the previous route through,_" EDI's voice chimed in all of a sudden.

"Right, let's go get this ship manifest, I _really _need a shower!" Shepard turned and jogged towards the door, squinting as the world was so strange and bright and _glowing_ with her augmented vision.

XXX

As they made their way through the warehouse complex Shepard couldn't help but smile at the dreamlike state she was in as they tore through the vastly outmatched mercs. She had her best friend on her left and the woman she loved on her right and in this highly augmented biotic trance she was in she could _feel_ them on a level she'd never been able to before. They pulsed in synchrony with her, she could _anticipate_ their movements, what their next action was going to be through the way their energy flowed through their aura's.

With Miranda it was exquisite as they biotically danced together and Shepards heart raced even faster. She lost all track of time and barely seemed to notice that her vision was deteriorating, she just followed that breathtaking silver aura through the corridors and stairwells with no questions asked. Shepard didn't even realize that she hadn't heard from EDI since that warning in the large loading facility.

That delightful, hazy, biotic bubble was completely ruptured as the destructive trio worked their way through a large number of Loki mechs on a platform area joining the warehouse facility to the high level offices. While the mechs posed no threat themselves they did provide the necessary distraction for a pair of gunships to let loose a barrage of missile fire.

Shepard hastily erected an impenetrable biotic barrier as the fiery barrage struck the platform, however, Miranda who was on point and completely exposed to the blindside attack wasn't fast enough.

Shepards entire world narrowed to a singular point as that beloved and treasured silver aura flared to almost blinding and was sent flying through the air. She _felt_ the sickening crunch as Miranda's body slammed into the solid framework of the building. Then her heart just stopped in her chest as that warm, powerful and oh so compelling silver aura was snuffed out.

Not dimmed.

Not injured.

_Gone._

Shepard's scream of rage and anguish was a wave of biotic force and sound that shook the entire platform and even wrecked havoc on the gunships stabilizers.

XXX

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Are you absolutely positive?"

"Yes."

"Cos you know we could always just turn around..."

Ice blue eyes narrowed up at the forest greens holding her gaze.

The taller brunette let out a dramatic sigh, "Fiiiine. Shoulda just kept mah mouth shut god damnit." With clear resignation she closed those brilliant green eyes and concentrated, bowing her head slightly.

"What's our ETA?" The blue eyed woman called to the pilot of the small shuttle.

"We're coming up to the warehouse now, I'm not getting any chatter out of the ord... wait." There was a pause before the soft Russian accented voice continued, "I'm not getting anything out of the Eclipse base but everything else is normal. I _am_ picking up a hell of a lot of weapons fire though Lieutenant."

The brunette stiffened all of a sudden, "Aw shit, this is a really fucking bad idea, whoever's in there just lost it."

"Doesn't surprise me if she was triggered earlier she's going to be unstable." The blonde Lieutenant shrugged slightly and glanced out the window at the Elysium skyline.

The brunette shook her head, "This one aint like anything I've felt before, and she's... wild."

"Backing down from a challenge? What, you scared?" The Lieutenant purposefully baited, the expression on her pale heart shaped face remaining a mask of calmness.

The brunette scoffed and looked at the woman opposite her sharply then smirked, "Not on your life Sunshine."

"_Govno!_" The Russian pilot suddenly swore and the shuttle jerked causing the two in the back to lose their balance and crash into the wall.

"What the _hell _Chekov?" The Lieutenant snarled at the injury to her dignity.

"We have a... situation. _Something_ just took out two Eclipse gunships and knocked out our stabilizers. Setting down as close as I can to the target," the pilot, Ensign Halle Chekov, quickly regained control of the craft and put them down on a balcony below the damage zone from the gunship explosions.

The Lieutenant glanced at her companion who's normally bronzed skin had paled quite significantly, "What?" The demand was not teasing or playful as she could see whatever it was that was bothering the tall warrior was serious.

Forest green eyes opened and she swallowed, "Have I told you this plan is fucked up? Whoever this chick is she's just gone apeshit and I mean completely off her rocker and the power she's got... Shit Naz she makes me feel like a whelp."

"All the more reason for us to contain her before it's not Eclipse mercs she's massacring," the Lieutenant took a deep breath as Ensign Chekov opened the hatch. Pulling on her navy blue helmet and checking the seal was tight she shouldered her normal medic pack, clipped her collapsed sniper across the small of her back and with her powerful Carnifex hand cannon drawn she lightly jumped down from the shuttle.

"Ya it's the _containing_ her that I'm worried about," sighed the tall warrior under her breath as she followed the marine into the seemingly abandoned complex.

It wasn't long before they came across the first bodies.

The brunette whistled through her teeth, "And I thought I left a mess."

Narrowing her ice blue eyes the Lieutenant quickly surveyed the bodies, "She's wasting energy, too much power," she kept her voice soft in case there were any survivors around, but she highly doubted it.

"Show off," muttered the brunette, leaving the bodies behind quickly and following the path of destruction up a couple levels then passed the balcony that was in tatters from the gunship explosions.

Moving quickly as there was no left from Eclipse to slow them down the brunette stopped them at the entrance to another large store room.

"She's in there, I don't sense anyone else," whispered the brunette.

The green panel on the door suddenly turned red blocking their entrance.

"_Please state your business,_" a feminine voice suddenly sounded through their secured communicators.

"Who the... this is an encrypted Alliance channel, name and rank now!" the Lieutenant snapped, glaring as she looked around for any sign of the intruder.

"_My name is EDI, I am acting under the authorization of Spectre Shepard. However, I am unable to reach her, she is in the room ahead of you and given her current emotional state it is inadvisable for you to enter at this point in time._"

"Shit that's _Shepard_ in there?" the Lieutenant cursed under her breath and suddenly understood why her companion was so concerned that not even her normal bravado was breaking through.

"_Correct. I am unable to raise her on comms and she's showing no signs of calming._"

"Edi was it? Did something happen earlier today, something similar?"

"_Yes._"

"How was she calmed?"

"_I imitated the voice of her XO, however, she is not responding to that this time. I have made numerous attempts using the voices of the people she trusts and none have had an effect._"

"You... imitated someone's voice?"

"_Correct,"_ this time EDI imitated the Lieutenants voice having enough of a voice print from listening in to their soft chatter since their arrival.

"Ok she's good," the brunette grinned at the flushed cheeks of the marine.

"_Her vitals are extremely unstable, she has received an overdose of Minagen X3 from her confrontation with the Eclipse mercenaries. I have called in support which will be arriving shortly but they will not reach her in time._" The lock on the door turned to green, _"Please be careful Lieutenant._"

The marine took a deep breath and removed her helmet, hoping that seeing her face and that she was human might make her less of a threat than the asari mercs. "I want you to hold back, only intervene if she attacks."

"Got it boss, she lifts a finger and I'll have her on her arse."

Cautiously opening the door the first thing that she noticed through the debris that was strewn across the huge room was the pockets of red haze that were still settling from the fight. Picking her way through the tossed crates and bodies she was very aware that the warrior behind her kept her distance but could biotically charge in to take Shepard by surprise in seconds. It didn't take her long to locate the Commander.

Commander Shepard, the hero of the galaxy, was standing over a bloody blue pulp that used to be an asari. Dark energy was swirling around her violently even though she stood still. The marine did pick up that Shepard was clenching and unclenching her hands, it was the only movement the woman was making.

Cautiously skirting around the side of the room so she didn't approach Shepard from behind but from in front she got within talking distance and her trained medical eye was analysing everything before her.

Shepards eyes were closed tight, her face was tear streaked through the dust that clung to her, the veins in her neck were bulging and she was straining fiercely against something unseen.

"Steph, can you hear me?" she asked softly.

For a moment there was no response.

Then confusion furrowed that red stained brow.

"Steph honey, look at me please," she kept her voice gentle and tender, her demeanour calm.

Unfamiliar glowing eyes opened and it was impossible to tell if they were focussed.

"I know you," Shepards voice was a broken husky croak.

"It's been awhile Steph," the Lieutenant nodded approached slowly, warily, watching for any sign of Shepard losing control, "Remember Elysium?"

Shepard snarled and her biotics spiked, "Batarians."

"We stopped them, you led the response on the ground and I patched you up."

Recognition had the biotics subside, "Keya!"

Lieutenant Keya Nastaran smiled and nodded, "You inspired me to join the Alliance. I'm an N5 now, combat med."

Shepard cocked her face to the side, "Why are you here?" The words were slow and ponderous as though Shepard was having trouble forming them.

"Where is here?" Keya asked carefully, stopping her advance within arms reach of the still incredibly dangerous being in front of her.

Shepard frowned and looked around as thought seeing the place for the first time, "I was... Justicar Samara..."

Keya watched those glowing eyes dart from side to side as though they were searching for the answers in her mind.

"Ship manifest to track some... ardat yakshi. But it all went wrong." The confusion on that stained, glowing face broke down into agonized despair, "I couldn't protect them Keya. Oh goddess Miranda!"

The biotic surge was a blast of uncontrolled power that flung Keya back over a desk and scattered a pile of datapads.

The brunette holding back at the door responded by charging in and slamming into Shepard.

This was entirely the wrong thing to do.

Shepard had already felt the charge and her hunters instinct had prepared for the impact.

The biotic clash was like a bomb blast. Everything that wasn't part of the floor was thrown to the walls in every direction.

The desk protected Keya from the worse of it but it still knocked the stuffing out of her and took a moment for her vision to clear and her breath to return. When it did she cursed her companion vehemently then snarled, "Satria if Stephanie doesn't kill you I'm going to whoop your arse!"

Watching the duel Keya lapsed into awed silence. She knew both women from personal experience were brutal in close quarter combat and that was when they were _in control_. Right now Shepard was out of control and Chasen Satria, the last known survivor of a very gruesome test regime, was very close to losing control herself.

They moved so fast it was hard to follow, Shepard was a dancer and could read aura's with such depth that Satria had a very hard time getting a solid hit on her but when she did it cracked like thunder and had the cybernetically enhanced woman wincing. What had Satria so close to losing it, however, was how overwhelming Shepard's power, speed and strength were compared to her own. The chemical induced boost to Shepards biotics went far beyond anything she'd ever faced before. _Every_ hit Shepard landed broke something and that was _with_ her barriers at full strength. Pain was threatening to push Satria over that last edge of control.

Shepard snarled viciously as an elbow grazed her cheek and she responded to the opening given by her opponent with a brutal open palmed upthrust, striking with the heel of her hand so hard the humerus bone of her attacker shattered.

Satria howled in pain and anger and at that moment completely lost control.

"Oh _shit,_" Keya gasped, her eyes widened in fear, as until now she'd hoped that she'd be able to calm them down once they got the fight out of their systems.

Shepard _felt_ the change in her opponent, watched as her strangely peaceful jade aura was overwhelmed by a dark red and black vortex of bestial rage, her very scent changed and the air around her charged with something _other._

As blazing biotic eyes met fierce green their gazes locked and the fight became something entirely different.

For beast knew beast.

XXX

Keya was not biotic. She was not attuned to dark energy by any means. The building charge in the air, the heavy stench of ozone and the visible storm of violet and indigo and blue and black that swirled around _both_ woman was terrifying her more than when they'd been in motion.

For right now they stood, frozen, Shepard still holding Satria's broken arm, Satria was half turned from Shepard from that blow that was supposed to break Shepards nose but she had not moved a millimetre from that painful grip. Their eyes were locked, their nostrils were flared, their chests heaving and their teeth bared at each other.

All Keya could hear was their ragged breaths and the pounding of her own heart. She had done enough research on the conditioning of Chasen Satria to know that right now the most endangered being in the room was herself. Hunters and prey. While the two hunters were locked in on each other they didn't notice her. However, should the worst happen, should one overpower the other, that would leave her with an awakened predator that had been bred to hunt something even they themselves had yet to understand.

That left her with two options.

One. She could try and sneak out of the room and lock the door.

Two. She could try and sedate them both at the same time.

Her blue eyes flicked to the door, judging the distance and whether it was possible for her to flee. Nope that wasn't gonna happen, it was just too far. Flicking back to the stationary duo her heart clenched painfully.

Shepards face was flushed but there were _cracks_ in her skin that were blazing red and orange, that hellish glow was even burning through the blazing biotics of her eyes.

Their body language was subtly changing as well.

Satria though she was taller seemed to be shrinking and starting to shift back.

Shepard was in a full alpha dominating stance, somehow seeming larger and _growing._

Whatever she was going to do, she had to do it fast, and extremely carefully.

XXX

Rage. Strength. Blood.

Teeth. Blood. Darkness.

Blood. Claws. Fire.

Instinct. Blood. Pain.

Ozone. Burning. Blood.

They tore at each other.

Lashed out in that dark plane.

Claws and teeth ripping through muscle and sinew.

Instinct.

Hunter.

Beast.

Burning.

Bloodied.

There was nothing else.

Only the fight.

Only survival.

Only each other.

Both wounded.

Both dangerous.

Both lost.

Black and blood red clashed with black and indigo fire.

The fire burned brighter, hotter, hissing with each spray of blood. Until the attacker came to understand that with every attack she came back more bloodied, more broken, more mangled. Her mind was on fire, she could smell it burning, tasted it. The burning was combined with the metallic flavour of blood so sharp it filled her senses.

Both pulled back.

Both were starting to become more aware.

Their eyes were opening to this strange dark plane that was flashes of colour, sensations, smells, sounds in the all encompassing darkness.

Sleek and powerful, one paced, back and forward, back and forward, limping on six mangled paws that ended in long claws that would be clicking on a hard surface but this plane did not hold that kind of physical form. Its black fur seemed to suck in the red crackling light around it and was marred by tears and bright red blood. A long, thin tail snaked out behind it, whipping from side to side in fury. It snarled through a mouthful of razor fangs and oversized incisors. Yellow catlike eyes with flecks of forest green never left the other form.

Indigo fire licked over the searing lava like skin of the figure crouched on two legs. Slender but muscular arms that ended in five sickeningly sharp talons were held close to her body, resting on the knuckles and giving definite aura of waiting. Wings coated in indigo fire were partially unfurled in readiness to change the very battlefield itself. The pointed oval eyes were large, black with burning amber pupils and saw much. Yet even this powerful being was not untouched by this battle of wills. Claw marks ripped through her skin but instead of liquid blood it was fire tinged with rusty red that dripped from her.

The pacing beast lowered its head slightly and snarled before leaping at the other once more, all of its power and strength put toward this one last strike.

The winged beast leapt, wings outstretched and soaring over the other. The darkness around them swirled with energy and movement and the clash of indigo and red. Those long arms reached down as she flew and raked the exposed back of the beast below her.

Howling in agony and defeat the one below somehow managed to twist, causing more damage to itself as the talons of the one above dug deep, however it was able to lash out with two sets of bloodied claws and ripped into the side of the beast above. It sent them both sprawling and crashing to the edges between the empty void and consciousness as the agony was overwhelming.

Parted and hovering in that place between they both found other senses returning.

Yellow, green flecked eyes darted to the other aura in the area, of soft, velvety roses.

Prey.

Black and amber eyes narrowed at the shift in the aura before her.

XXX

Keya had knelt and was very carefully getting out the strongest sedatives she had. A shiver trickled down her spine, cold and terrifying. Looking up slowly, her heartbeat racing and pounding even louder in her own ears, her world came to a stop. Unrecognizable green eyes locked on hers.

"Chasen..." she breathed in horror, eyes wide and unable to move as fear paralysed her.

Then it happened.

It was a blur of movement.

Keya blinked and Satria had freed herself of Shepards grasp, nearly losing her arm in the process, and was suddenly standing over her. Satria's normally beautiful face that held that infuriatingly lazy smirk was twisted in a hideous mask of bestial rage.

Just as suddenly Satria was gone in a rush of wind and biotics and was something burning?

Spinning on her haunches Keya turned to see Shepard bodily pinning Satria to the wall, wrenching that broken arm further until Satria screamed in submission.

Keya rose to her feet, this was it, this was her only chance. Syringe in each hand and still trembling as she tried to swallow her fear she ran.

Satria stopped screaming as Shepard lowered her head and was gasping for air breathlessly.

Keya came at them from the left side where both necks were exposed. Her mind didn't even cognize that Shepard was _biting_ Satria at the point where her neck and right shoulder met.

The snap hiss of the syringes sounded almost explosively loud to the raw senses of pair on the receiving end.

Shepard jerked back and looked over her shoulder to where Keya was backing up quickly. Satria was falling limp in her arms almost immediately but Shepard herself was an anomaly when it came to medications of any kind and right now it only tingled barely perceptible to her already boiling blood.

Keya watched as those burning eyes widened and snapped to something now behind her, the fire dimming significantly and fury replaced by shock.


	39. Turning Point

**Apologies for the multiple posts! FanFic just wasn't being friendly! Enjoy!**

* * *

><p>Keya's eyes widened as the tall human woman strode straight for Shepard, those long legs closing the distance quickly, dark energy swirled around her like a beacon. It was though she was just asking to get her arse kicked by Shepard! "Lady you have no idea what you're messing with, get out!" she hissed, glancing warily at Shepard who was somehow not only still standing after the heavy sedative but seemed to be in a trance, eyes only for the sexy dark haired brunette and lips parted in an expression of shock.<p>

Miranda ignored the marine, her every sense was focused right now on Stephanie Shepard. To anyone else the immensity, chaos and animalistic mind before her would have been terrifying to feel at the intimate level she could. To anyone else the right response would be to indeed flee. Miranda, however, knew differently. There was something in her that _knew_ Shepard would never hurt her, no matter what state she was in, no matter how wild or feral her mind had gone and that right now Shepard desperately needed her.

Stopping in front of Shepard she gave a sultry smirk and reached up to her shoulder, unclasping the black sleeve but saying nothing. She didn't take her eyes away from Shepards, holding those biotic fires captive with her own. Slowly pulling off her right sleeve she took her time to make sense of the complex being before her.

Shepard was a mess. Minagen had caked to her face from the tears and blood. The cybernetics were being so overworked they'd damaged her skin which caused further widening of the already present cracks. Heat radiated off her as though she was literally on fire but for some reason she wasn't sweating like the normal response of the body should be for overheating. Biotically Shepard was incredibly unstable and there was a _painful_ undertone that permeated them which Miranda couldn't help but wince at internally.

All of that was simply the immediate surface level observation.

Far more important right now was the effect the Minagen combined with the beast had on Shepards _mind_.

So many raw and jumbled emotions that were overlaid with _instinct,_ it was impossible to make sense of. The whole melding of minds thing was just still too new, unexplored and foreign for Miranda to rely on or even attempt to use to dive into that mess just yet. The first thing she needed to do was to calm down that overwhelming storm so that she could begin making _sense_ of it.

Sleeve removed she stepped closer, entering Shepards space purposefully as she reached over and unclipped Shepards flask, her movements slow and steady.

Shepards hand shakily reached up for her face and Miranda subtly shook her head, "Armor off," the order was firm but quietly spoken. The armor was tainted with Minagen and the last thing Miranda wanted was to be compromised herself. Shepard blurred into motion, going for the seals of her armor, shaking it off as though it was on fire and letting the pieces just fall to the ground with a loud clatter.

While she did that Miranda poured the water from the flask over the sleeve she'd removed.

Down to the Minagen free armor underlay Shepard reached up for Miranda's face again and this time Miranda didn't stop her.

Shepard actually bit her lip and whimpered as her fingers brushed those pale, soft cheeks, trailing that perfect jaw and reverently and oh so gently exploring, "Your light went out," she whispered, her voice husky and still confused.

Now it was Miranda's turn to reach up and she began to wipe the dust and grime and blood from Shepards face starting from her forehead and working down, "I'm here now," she murmured gently and smiled tenderly.

Carefully and with the steady hands of a surgeon Miranda washed away the worst of the caked on drug and blood, she was being especially careful around the cracks which were more like open wounds right now. As she did Shepards hands never left her own face and the shock and despair that had surged and fought within Shepard turned to wonder as the touch, the sensation of feeling Miranda physically, mentally and biotically was a balm to whatever it was Shepard had seen in her mind that had pushed her to this state.

The damp material was like a gentle caress compared to the ache Shepards body had been experiencing. With her face as clean as a damp sleeve could make it Shepard closed her eyes and gently touched her forehead to Miranda's, Miranda lowering her face a little to meet Shepard halfway.

Miranda purposefully left those full lips till last and slowly wiped a clean patch of the sleeve across Shepards top lip. She heard the sharp intake of breath, felt the beat change and the temperature starting to rise for a very different reason in Shepard.

Reaching up with her still gloved hand she gently cupped the side of Shepard's face as she drew the sleeve across Shepards trembling bottom lip. When she was done she closed the short distance between them, pressing her hips to Shepard, dropping the ruined sleeve aside and quickly sliding her hand to the bare skin of Shepards neck.

The breath hitched in Shepards throat and she growled, tilting her head back and completely under Miranda's spell as she could see in her aura exactly what she was wanting to do.

XXX

Keya jumped slightly as someone cleared his throat nearby and turned to see a tall Turian with heavily scarred face looking down at her.

"Let's get your friend out of here, Miranda will look after Shepard," he gestured to the slumped form of the unconscious brunette.

Keya frowned, "Who the hell are you?" she snapped, he wore no uniform just merc armour.

"Garrus Vakarian, Shepard's wingman," he winked at her and confidently strode over to where Miranda was gently guiding Shepard away from the unconscious human.

"_Lieutenant Nastaran, the Normandy is prepared to receive Chasen Satria for medical attention. I have contacted your shuttle pilot Ensign Chekov with the quickest route to our location,_" EDI's voice chimed in quickly and calmly.

Keya hesitated for only a moment longer, yes Chasen needed medical attention quickly, there was no telling how much damage had been done and not just physically. Giving only a short, curt nod she quickly followed the Turian and helped move her friend. Risking a quick glance at the woman who had been her inspiration for so long she felt her heart break a little at how Shepard was sobbing into the mysterious Miranda's shoulder and clutching her as if her world would fall apart without her. What had happened to Shepard? How _long_ had she been one of the test subjects? Why the hell hadn't they told her about _Shepard?_

Carefully she checked over Chasen to make sure there was nothing immediately life threatening, she internally winced at the state her arm was in. Shepard sure had done a number on that and would definitely need some intricate work done on the bone. Not to mention all the _other_ injuries, she was damn certain broken ribs and clavicle were on the list and internal bleeding was more than likely.

Without another word the Turian gently picked up Chasen at the nod of approval from Keya and he glanced over to Shepard's fallen gear in silent question.

Keya warily looked over to make sure Miranda had moved Shepard far enough away and quietly gathered up the pieces. Biting her lip as she dropped one of the gauntlets she looked up quickly to see Miranda reaching up and turning Shepards face back to her and thoroughly distracting her with a passionate kiss. Keya exhaled slowly then beat feet out of there, hot on the Turian's heels then leading him to where Chekov was waiting with the shuttle.

XXX

Miranda soothed Stephanie tenderly. She was very relieved that just like last time Shepard had become gentle at her passionate kiss and the beast withdrew back into the depths of that vast and magnificent mind. Words weren't necessary right now. All Shepard wanted was to be held and that wish she was very willing to fulfill.

She had purposefully backed Shepard away from the injured woman and her fallen gear and had felt Shepards attention waiver at the clatter behind them. A heated thought and caress had all other concerns melt away and Shepard relaxed into her.

Surprisingly the most prevalent sensation coursing through Shepard right now was not lust or passion but rather relief. Following that to its source through the blur of colours, emotions and chaos of the drug altered memories Miranda realized why. In that awful hallucination Shepard had thought she'd been killed, lost forever and in that moment something had snapped which is why she was in this broken state.

Miranda gently broke from those soft, warm lips and lightly kissed her way along Shepards jaw and up to her ear. With a smile she gave it a teasing little pull with her teeth and felt the rumble in Shepards chest in response, then whispered both in a seductively soft voice and thought, "I'm here, Stephanie."

It resounded in Shepards psyche and the tears that had threatened broke through the last shred of resolve as she clung to those words and to Miranda. They stood there in tight embrace for several minutes before Miranda felt Shepard physically start to cool which was a very good sign but the Minagen was still causing problems in her system.

"Come on Stephanie, let's get back to the Normandy," Miranda murmured softly, pulling back just enough for Shepard to realize they needed to move.

Shepard nodded and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, sniffling a little as she did she felt a strong pang of loss and uncertainty as she released Miranda.

Miranda simply moved beside her and slipped her arm around Shepard's waist thinking very clearly to her '_I'm right here.'_

Shepard relaxed and leant into her. With her vision still heavily overwhelmed by the biotics she relied on Miranda to guide her but this time felt very different. This time there was a fierce independence and sense of _self_ coming from Miranda that had been missing before. Her mind was still too fractured and all over the place for her to make sense of anything right now though.

XXX

"We're seriously going to the _Normandy_?" Chekov murmured, glancing over her shoulder at the Turian who had carried Satria on board.

"EDI did update you with the coordinates right?" Garrus asked, a little confused for a moment.

"Oh she did, just still can't believe it," Chekov exhaled and got them in the air. She couldn't help the excited grin at the thought of meeting _Commander Shepard_ and seeing the _Normandy_ in person

Garrus chuckled, "Well Dr Chakwas and Professor Mordin will get your friend all patched up."

Keya looked to Satria who was going to be out cold for awhile yet given the heavy sedative she'd been administered, not to mention all of her injuries, "Shepard certainly packs a punch."

"Ha wait till you see her go hand to hand with a Krogan. Your friend here must be something special to not have been plastered all over the walls," Garrus nodded in approval.

"That she is," Keya nodded in agreement, Garrus had no idea _how_ special. Looking up at the Turian with a thoughtful expression she cocked her head slightly, "How did you come to be Shepards _wingman_ of all things?" she asked very curious about that choice of word.

Garrus chuckled, "Now _that_ is a long story. She's one of those people that picks you up, dusts you off and sweeps you along with her from one death defying mission to another."

"She's certainly one of a kind and from what I've seen of her can pull off just about anything," Keya agreed, thinking back to that fateful day on Elysium that had changed her life forever, _Shepard_ had changed her life forever.

"Yeah, well don't trust everything the vids tell you. She's certainly _not_ crazy… at least not in the way they portray it, won't say she's not completely insane with the way she baits then charges at Krogans in blood rage," Garrus chuckled and shook his head slightly.

Keya huffed with a smirk, "Yeah, sounds like her. Did the same to the Batarians on Elysium."

Garrus looked at her sharply and with keen interest, "You were there?"

Keya nodded, "She saved my life, found out I was a med student and put me to work. She's the reason why I joined the Alliance, N4 combat med."

Garrus grinned, his blue eyes sparkling with anticipation at the thought of finding out more about Shepard from someone who'd known her from back then, "You may want to keep that under wraps for a bit when we get to the Normandy or a few of the crew may just tie you down and interrogate you."

Keya stiffened.

Garrus laughed, "Relax not like that." He assured her and put a talon to her shoulder, becoming serious, "Shepard's lost a lot of friends, I'm sure she'll want to have a good long talk with you when she's up for it."

Keya nodded, she had lots of things she wanted to talk to Shepard about as well, "Yeah, she's been through all kinds of hell, I thought she was dead to be honest."

"Long story that one, best she tells you," Garrus wasn't sure it would be wise to mention Cerberus just yet.

Keya simply nodded, her mind was reeling with everything that was going on right now. Discovering not only that Shepard was alive but was one of the subjects of the Hunter Project was incredibly disturbing.

Chakwas wasn't one to simply wait in her medbay for patients to be brought into her realm. Waiting in the shuttle bay her brow rose slightly at the Alliance shuttle that had been repainted and had all the Alliance badges removed but to the trained eye it couldn't be anything else. Patient stretcher hovering by her side she nodded to Garrus as he approached carrying a stranger in his strong arms.

"Dr Chakwas," he nodded to her, carefully placing the human female down.

"This is Chasen?" She was already running scans on her.

Another voice responded, "Yes, she has some medical anomalies you should be aware of."

Chakwas had already spotted them in the quick brain scan as her omni tool was already primed with Shepards medical history, "Ah, yes, I see. Will she need to be restrained?"

Keya frowned slightly at the quick response and _understanding_, "As long as I'm there when she wakes she should be fine."

"She went toe to toe with Shepard?" Chakwas nodded for Garrus to get moving with the stretcher.

"Yeah, stupid idiot," Keya scoffed, she wasn't overly concerned about her friend, Chasen had been pretty beat up before and healed damn fast.

Chakwas actually chuckled, "Well she did better than the krogans, come, let's get her put back together shall we."

"You're not going to wait for the Commander?" Keya looked to the other shuttle that came in behind them.

"Miranda will look after the Commander, doubt I could do anything without sedating _her_ first," Chakwas smiled, there was a touch of wryness in her tone but no malice. She was very aware of how those two felt about each other and Miranda knew Shepard's physiology better than anyone really had a right to know.

Up in the small medbay Keya made sure to stay right out of the way of the doctors. Doctor Chakwas and a salarian doctor called Mordin were working calmly but efficiently on Chasen, knitting her bones back together and restoring the heavy damage that had been inflicted on her. It took her a few minutes to realize that Miranda had not brought Shepard here to the medbay and she glanced out the windows wondering where they were.

xxx

Miranda helped Shepard out of the armor underlay then sought her eyes for permission to help her out of her underwear. The shower was running cool water behind them in readiness to wash out the Minagen that was in Shepards hair and to keep her core temperature down.

Shepard smirked, "Nothing you haven't seen before _Miss Lawson_," she whispered in her damn sexy husky voice.

Miranda smiled and stepped up to Shepard, pressing against her gently as she reached around to unclasp her bra.

Shepard just stood there smiling, even with her eyes closed she could see Miranda's aura with perfect clarity and she was breathtaking to behold.

Miranda stopped millimeters short of touching those lips with her own, lips that until very recently she'd never imagined even wanting to kiss. Lips she could feel curling in that irritating and sexy lopsided smirk, could just about taste and yet they were holding there, not closing the distance between them but not pulling back.

With a smirk of her own Miranda slid the straps from Shepards shoulders, her fingertips lightly brushing that feverish skin that sparked with biotic energy at her touch.

Shepard let the black no frills bra drop to the ground, her breath catching in her throat and biting her bottom lip as Miranda set her heart racing and her temperature rising so quickly she almost forgot to breathe.

Miranda reached down, sliding her hands slowly over Shepard's sides, drinking in the feel of soft skin, firm muscle and swirling biotic energy. Still not closing the distance between her lips and Shepards she closed her eyes and teased the incredible woman in her arms, her warm breath leaving a hot trail along Shepards jaw, down to the sensitive spot on her neck just above her pulse point.

Shepard bit her lip and while she managed to keep herself from shoving Miranda against the wall the best she could hold herself to, that let Miranda keep teasing and keep in control, was to grip Miranda's hips and shudder at the heat that was most definitely not drug induced coursing through her.

The strength of Shepard's grip wasn't lost on Miranda, she could feel the huge amount of self control Shepard was exerting and that was exactly what she needed Shepard to be doing to get the rest of her mind pulled back into line. It was also very, very gratifying that she was enjoying this just as much as Shepard was.

Stepping out of her underwear as they dropped to the ground Shepard found herself being guided by Miranda under the cool water. She hissed as it stung, the water washing the Minagen through the cracks on her face, but it was only momentary.

Miranda felt Shepard pulling away a little at the intrusion of pain on her mind. Not caring about getting wet herself she captured Shepard's lips with her own and drew Shepard back to her. As she did she felt that incredible mind not only open to her but inviting her in, not overpowering her, not swallowing her whole but with all its sheer power and foreignness it was tentative and hopeful and letting her in at her own pace. With a moan she entered that waiting embrace and the world around them changed.

Flashes. Memories. Conflicting emotions. Anger. Heartache. Frustration.

An underpinning of love that was so powerful Miranda was left reeling.

The memories were a mingling of Shepards and her own and it was so hard to tell what belonged to whom in this state and they seemed so inconsequential compared to the emotions and sensations that were running through them.

For the first time in so long Miranda found herself wanting more of someone. Shepard was powerful, mysterious, strong, emotional, gifted, chaotic and _needed_ her. Not just her intelligence, not just her appearance, not just what she could offer to be used but _herself_. It was something only one other person had ever wanted and she'd lost that once. Never again would she let go so easily. She'd never fought for Persephone, until she was gone and it was too late, she hadn't known how.

They both felt something almost physically click into place for Miranda and felt the rush as memories returned.

Shepard pulled back to give Miranda some space and waited with baited breath.

Miranda took a moment to make sense of it then gasped. Eyes wide she looked to Shepard, "I remember waking you up on Lazarus."

Shepard smiled as she could feel it and took a deep breath, relief flooding through her but also a sense of dismay as she'd hoped for a moment that perhaps she'd be able to remember more, "It's a start. Now where were we Miri?"

Miranda huffed as Shepard leaned back in and purposefully stopped, they could both feel she was being cheeky and that she knew Miranda wasn't going to keep kissing her right now, "We're getting that Minagen out of your system before it fries even more of your brain. I put a lot of work getting that back up to scratch."

Shepard chuckled, her biotic lit eyes twinkling a little.

XXX

In the medbay Keya noticed instantly that Shepard had clearly showered as all the Minagen and blood had been properly washed away. She was also a lot calmer, more in control and even though she was still flaring biotically there was a peace about her that had been missing before. It probably had to do with the also damp woman leading her in by the hand.

Keya caught the slight frown from Miranda but the woman didn't address her at all, instead just continued past her to the other free bed and began the process of scrubbing Shepards bloodstream of the dangerous drug. Upon closer inspection of Miranda, Keya noticed that she was also shimmering biotically and wondered once again what the connection between them was. It made her very, very curious about this exotically accented woman who had calmed the raging beast within Shepard with a kiss of all things. She was drop dead gorgeous and held herself with confidence and grace but there was an aura about her that screamed _dangerous_. Her biotics showed she had military training of some kind not to mention she carried a weapon with comfortable ease and was also very clearly a doctor as well as she expertly worked on Shepard.

With Shepard cleaned up, asleep and healing Miranda visibly relaxed. Leaning down she tenderly kissed Shepard's lips, lightly touching her face.

Keya's eyes narrowed a little as her mind flashbacked to Elysium.

"_Hey Doc, got another one for you," the softness in Shepards voice actually had her shuddering, she'd come to know very well what that tone meant. Taking a fortifying breath and turning she put on a friendly smile._

"_Hey there, what's your name sweetie?" Keya quickly took in the terrified and battered girl, the way she clung to the soldier beside her._

"_A-Anna," came the whispered response from a throat hoarse from screaming._

"_Anna, such a lovely name, I'm Keya, come sit down over here, you're safe now." Keya had held out her hand and nodded encouragingly._

_Shepard had gently guided the girl towards her, "Doc's the best, she'll take care of you ok Anna. I've got some more of those bastards to introduce to my bullets." _

_The girl had looked up at Shepard, "Kill them all?"_

_A darkness had washed over Shepard and her eyes actually glowed, "That's the plan gorgeous, every last fucking Batarian I see."_

_Anna had relaxed and nodded, "Good." With that she'd turned back to the Doc and willingly parted with her hero. She knew Shepard would wreak vengeance on the batarian pirates like the biotic goddess she'd been when out of nowhere she'd appeared and ripped off the terrifying batarian who'd been raping her._

_Keya had watched Shepard a moment longer. The marine had led a bunch of civilians and turned them into a fighting force. A force that had grown block by block as they'd pushed back the batarians, freed captured civilians and met up with other soldiers who were either garrisoned in the city or like herself were on shore leave. The pirates had targeted communications and had hit the garrison command center hard so leadership on the ground was practically out of commission. But Shepard had stepped up with fire in her eyes, purpose in her steps and authority in her voice. Keya had no idea what rank she even was but she had to be in her early twenties. _

_There was something about Stephanie Shepard that inspired people. She gave them hope when it seemed hopeless. She wasn't one for flowery speeches but action and her actions had been brutal against the batarians and so gentle when it had come to their victims. _

_Shepard had returned several hours later bloodied and with a few nasty wounds of her own. Keya had turned at the commotion as several kids ran up to her with wide eyes gushing about Shepard being hurt. The woman she had been treating gently put her hand over Keya's and had simply murmured, 'Go.'_

_Finding Shepard limping into the makeshift med center Keya had been astounded that she'd made it this far. Multiple knife wounds and bullet holes that had been slathered with medi-gel, some with the fragments still embedded, had left her covered in blood and dangerously pale. It had taken her an hour in the difficult circumstances and with a growing audience to treat all of the injuries as she'd discovered more with the removing of the tattered uniform. _

_Of course Shepard had insisted on being treated in front of everyone, she wasn't going to go hide in a corner. The whole time she was grinning of all things and telling everyone exactly how she'd gotten each wound with pride as Keya treated it._

_The people listened utterly riveted and their panic at the thought of losing their beacon of hope ebbed away in the face of her courage, optimism and energy. _

_Once she was done Keya sat back and simply looked at Shepards face for a long moment._

"_What is it Doc?"_

"_How do you do it? Keep fighting and smiling no matter how hurt you are?"_

_Shepard had grinned and closed her eyes, relaxing back and taking a deep breath, "I picture her, the girl I love, her gorgeous blue eyes, the way she smiled... We were separated a few years ago and I promised that I'd find her. I'm going to keep that promise," she'd opened her eyes and the smile had gone to be replaced by fury, "and no fucking Batarian is going to stop me."_

Blinking rapidly Keya was a little disoriented but quickly got her bearings again. Looking back to where Miranda was straightening she couldn't help but notice that little smile and those blue eyes and it made sense. Was this the same woman Shepard had been fighting for all those years ago? Or was she simply someone who resembled her first love? Either way she was going to pester Shepard about it when she was up and about again.

With Shepard now stabilizing Miranda left, she didn't interrupt the others while they worked on Chasen and barely cast a glance at Keya herself who was quick to move back out of the way. Keya's gaze followed her for a few moments, the woman clearly had a lot on her mind right now and politeness wasn't one of them.

Looking back to the unconscious Chasen Satria she continued to monitor from afar, she had become a combat med after she'd nearly completed her final rotation and what they were doing at the moment was something she was perfectly capable of. However, what was of more interest to her right now was finding out just how much these people knew of the genetic modifications and neural anomalies in Shepard and Satria.

"Doctor Chakwas, you recognized the anomaly in Chasen's neural structure rather quickly," Keya began softly, waiting to see if she'd be told to wait outside.

"I have encountered it before yes," she nodded, her manner was calm and she continued working on the broken young woman before. Mordin was a pleasure to work with, his constant mutterings and musings like a hamster on coffee were both enlightening and entertaining and they seemed to flow together well considering they hadn't known each other long.

Keya nodded slowly, "Are you aware of any of its functions?"

Doctor Chakwas didn't reply for a moment as she collected her thoughts, "I know it is something not to be trifled with, I also know it's something very powerful people have gone to extreme lengths to protect."

Keya moved over to stand at the end of the bed, her voice soft, "Indeed. How long has Shepard been having episodes like today?"

Doctor Chakwas looked to her with slightly narrowed eyes, "That's not something I can discuss with you Lieutenant, doctor/patient confidentiality."

Keya nodded almost absently, focused on Chasen's peaceful face, "They have triggers, it's different for each subject and they have to identify it and learn to control it or innocent people will die. Once they've been triggered and their hunter instinct's released it takes a very powerful connection to pull them back or they need to tire of their rampage."

Chakwas listened, watching the Lieutenant out of the corner of her eye as she pieced together the bone fragments in Satria's arm.

There was a long moment of silence as Keya thought through what had happened between Shepard and Satria. "Shepard had lost control and was pulling herself back when that idiot charged her. It was brutal, but something I've never seen before happened. We've been studying Chasen for several years now so I know most of her triggers and generally how to calm her but not reliably. It depends what's triggered her if she'll listen to me. During their fight they just stopped and... _stared_ at each other."

Chakwas showed no hint of surprise at that revelation in fact she nodded slightly as she took in that information, "You said _they_. I'm assuming there's more than just Stephanie and Chasen who've been altered like this."

"The few we've found have been… highly unstable," Keya actually winced, "Chasen's been the only one to survive. The others either killed themselves or the only way to stop them was to kill them," her voice was soft, saddened. "They were just kids or teenagers and we haven't been able to identify what about them is so unique that they're chosen by these bastards. They're always one damn step ahead of us, when we get _close_…" she shook her head, her knuckles turning white as she clenched her fists.

Chakwas now stopped what she was doing and looked to Keya, "Lieutenant, I'd be very interested in discussing more with you. However, for the time being you should be aware that this is a Cerberus vessel and everything you say is recorded."

Keya's eyes widened, she paled and took a step back, "_Cerberus?_"

"A temporary measure I can assure you, Shepard can explain more. Most on this ship are loyal to Shepard, many are ex-alliance who were drummed out of the service for supporting her while the brass turned on her. However, I advise caution." Chakwas wasn't about to give the Illusive Man more ammunition against Shepard by talking freely about this, no matter how much she wanted to learn more herself so she could help Shepard.

Keya took a deep breath, "Thank you, Doctor Chakwas. I had no idea… that Cerberus was allowing aliens in their ranks," she glanced from the Salarian professor out to the Turian, Krogan and Asari milling around the lunch room.

"Oh they don't, that's Shepard's influence in putting together her own crew. I'm fully expecting to add a Quarian to the list soon, Shepard prefers a great deal of diversity amongst the people she works with," Chakwas couldn't hide the touch of pride in her voice. Shepard was every bit the Spectre in how much she embraced the other cultures from galactic society, she was exactly the kind of representative Humanity needed… if only the Alliance could realize that.

"No Batarians though," Keya smirked a little darkly.

Chakwas chuckled, "Oh not on your life. The fact she hasn't declared war on them is a miracle and testament to her self control."

"Very understandable given Shepards history," Mordin nodded, "will be very interesting if Shepard can convince the Justicar to join," there was a touch of humor in his voice at the thought.

"A Justicar?" Keya's brow rose, "On a _Cerberus_ ship?"

Chakwas chuckled, "Interesting times indeed."

"Could definitely aid in mission. Or make mission a short one," Mordin began to hum under his breath as he finished up what he was doing.

"What could be so important that Shepard would be willing to do a mission for Cerberus? Especially consider what they _did_ to her…" Keya just couldn't put it together in her mind.

Chakwas sobered quickly, "The Collectors are abducting entire human colonies, hundreds of thousands of people have been taken and neither the Alliance nor the Council have been willing to do anything other than blame it on slavers. Cerberus is giving Shepard the resources to find out more about and put a stop to the abductions."

Keya was silent as she processed that. She'd heard rumors about colonies being attacked by slavers but _this_ was news to her. When had she fallen so far out of the loop?

"So Shepard is doing what she does best, putting together a team of the brightest and hunting down the Collectors like she did Saren," Chakwas finished with a confident nod of approval.

Keya scoffed, "They're as good as dead."

"My thoughts exactly," the gleam in the green eyes of the doctor was one of unmistakable pride and anticipation.

Keya looked over at the sleeping woman. Seeing her so peaceful it was almost hard to imagine that beneath that façade was one of the most dangerous beings in the galaxies. She didn't know how Shepard had managed to keep herself under control but right now seemed to be a turning point. Whatever controls Shepard had been using on herself until now were clearly failing, especially if she'd lost that control twice in one day.

While whatever happened from now was going to be far from easy, Keya took a moment in the quietness to let a sense of relief wash over her. Anything was possible with Shepard and even with the Cerberus issue maybe, just maybe they'd be able to figure out what had been done to her and Chasen… and more importantly, why.

**Hope everyone's had a lovely Christmas or whatever holiday you celebrate this time of year!**

**oh and *GASP* less than a month between chapters! \o/**

**Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! I've missed you awesome peoples!**


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